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Fifty Shades of Chicken: A Parody in a Cookbook [Kindle Edition]

F.L. Fowler
4.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (334 customer reviews)

Print List Price: $19.99
Kindle Price: $9.99
You Save: $10.00 (50%)
Sold by: Random House LLC

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Book Description

Dripping Thighs, Sticky Chicken Fingers, Vanilla Chicken, Chicken with a Lardon, Bacon-Bound Wings, Spatchcock Chicken, Learning-to-Truss-You Chicken, Holy Hell Wings, Mustard-Spanked Chicken, and more, more, more!
 
Fifty chicken recipes, each more seductive than the last, in a book that makes every dinner a turn-on. 
 
“I want you to see this. Then you’ll know everything. It’s a cookbook,” he says and opens to some recipes, with color photos. “I want to prepare you, very much.” This isn’t just about getting me hot till my juices run clear, and then a little rest. There’s pulling, jerking, stuffing, trussing. Fifty preparations. He promises we’ll start out slow, with wine and a good oiling . . . Holy crap. “I will control everything that happens here,” he says. “You can leave anytime, but as long as you stay, you’re my ingredient.” I’ll be transformed from a raw, organic bird into something—what? Something delicious.
 
So begins the adventures of Miss Chicken, a young free-range, from raw innocence to golden brown ecstasy, in this spoof-in-a-cookbook that simmers in the afterglow of E.L. James’s sensational Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy. Like Anastasia Steele, Miss Chicken finds herself at the mercy of a dominating man, in this case, a wealthy, sexy, and very hungry chef.  

And before long, from unbearably slow drizzling to trussing, Miss Chicken discovers the sheer thrill of becoming the main course. A parody in three acts—“The Novice Bird” (easy recipes for roasters), “Falling to Pieces” (parts perfect for weeknight meals), and “Advanced Techniques” (the climax of cooking)—Fifty Shades of Chicken is a cookbook of fifty irresistible, repertoire-boosting chicken dishes that will leave you hungry for more.

With memorable tips and revealing photographs, Fifty Shades of Chicken will have you dominating dinner.


From the Hardcover edition.


Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

Featured Recipe: Dripping Thighs

Dripping Thighs

The way his apron hangs from his hips already has me all wobbly. But as he coats my thighs with sticky liquid I can hardly contain myself. Is it the wine, or is my aroma starting to drive him crazy too? He heats me up fast, it won’t take much too?

He heats me up fast, it won’t take much to finish me off now. His lips quirk up to a smile. My own juices are mixing with the coating and running all over the place. I get the strangest, sweetest, hedonistic feeling up and down. It’s epicureanism run wild!

He spreads my thighs out on a plate. Sticky hands and at least five wet napkins. What will the housekeeper think? Who cares?

Ingredients
  • 1 pound boneless, skinless chicken thighs, patted dry with paper towels
  • 2 garlic cloves, finely chopped
  • 1 teaspoon plus pinch coarse kosher salt
  • ½ teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
  • 1 sweet onion, thinly sliced
  • 1 cup white wine
  • 1 bay leaf
  • 1 cinnamon stick
  • 2 tablespoons unsalted butter
  • 1 tablespoon honey
Directions

Preheat the oven to 450 degrees F. In a large bowl, toss the chicken, garlic, 1 teaspoon salt, and pepper together.

In a small saucepan, simmer together onion, wine, bay leaf, cinnamon stick, and a pinch of salt until most of the liquid has evaporated, 15 to 20 minutes. Toss in the honey and butter.

Spoon the mixture over the chicken and toss well. Spread thighs, onion mixture, and any juices onto a baking sheet. Bake until chicken is no longer pink and onions are meltingly tender and caramelized, about 25 minutes.

Review

“…it will undoubtedly become one of America's most cherished cookbooks of all time.”
-Eater.com
 
“Like any good parody, this manages to make fun of both the flabby porn of "Fifty Shades" and the gushing language of "food porn…” -BonAppetit.com
 
“…this genius little tidbit that combines the sexual and the culinary…” -Glamour.com
 
“All signs indicate that Fifty Shades of Chicken, a new cookbook parodying erotic novel Fifty Shades of Grey, is the real deal. We can't get over the hilarity of the description on the book's web site.” -Huffington Post

"The book that spawned “mommy porn” has now given a new meaning to playing with your food. . . You’ll never look at chickens the same way again." -Salon.com

"Besides clever writing with laugh-out-loud double entendres, Fifty Shades of Chicken offers 50 (of course) tempting recipes, among them Crunchy Chicken Parmesan Croquettes and Cranberry Baked Chicken With Apple Cider." -The Republic

Product Details

  • File Size: 14901 KB
  • Print Length: 160 pages
  • Publisher: Clarkson Potter (November 13, 2012)
  • Sold by: Random House LLC
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B009JU5G9C
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Lending: Not Enabled
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #177,834 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
  •  Would you like to give feedback on images?.


Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
86 of 89 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Nice Breasts November 15, 2012
Format:Hardcover|Verified Purchase
Fifty Shades of Chicken: A Parody in a Cookbook opens with the genius dedication, "For chicken lovers everywhere," and just gets lewder from there. In addition to being a parody of "Fifty Shades of Grey"-style erotica written from the perspective of a young hen, "Fifty Shades of Chicken" is also a lavishly illustrated cookbook in its own right. With titles like "Plain Vanilla Chicken" and "Steamy White Meat," the recipes are what makes this book more than a one-note joke or gag gift (pun intended). If only more cookbooks were this profane.
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50 of 53 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars High quality - and terribly entertaining! November 18, 2012
Format:Hardcover|Verified Purchase
After reading a couple of excerpts, I decided that I had to get this book - I was hoping it would be the perfect wedding present. I pre-ordered 4 copies, and they arrived yesterday. I am completely impressed with the quality of the book itself, and the pictures are somewhere in between traditional glossy cookbook pictures and tasteful food erotica (male hands, forearms, and abs are pictured - and those are high quality as well!). There are a couple of pages where there is a very minor blurring / shading issue with the text (only noticeable because the rest of the book is so impeccably done), but other than that, I am completely happy. I look forward to giving this at bridal showers, anniversary parties, or any other event I can think of!
** Important disclaimer - I have not tried any of the recipes. However, they look wonderful - and I laughed myself silly reading the cookbook last night! Hurray for FL Fowler!
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54 of 58 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Dripping Thighs?!? Extra Virgin Breasts?!? Yes Please!!! December 14, 2012
Format:Hardcover|Verified Purchase
What can be said about this book?!? I picked up a copy for my Mother, my sister, and my aunt as a Christmas present. I believe all of them have read 50 Shades of Grey. Regardless if they have or haven't it should be worth a laugh at Christmas time, right?!? When the book arrived I just had to open it. Being a guy, I have not read the original book (not enough pictures for me) but my wife had (thank God) so I knew what the premise was. Boy did it have me rolling on the ground laughing. It is VERY well written. I read it to my wife, out loud, in the best Patrick Stewart voice I could muster. While I might not get all the "inside" jokes that people who followed the original picked up on, I can recognize good writing when I see it. This was VERY well done! The book is beautiful. Nice print, nice pictures, nice feeling to the pages and the binding. Just all around well printed book. I am the cook of our household being a former Sous chef. I have not made anything out if this book yet since the only copies I have are going to other people. But, yes I will admit, I have ordered a copy for myself to read, alone, by the fire for some "inspiration". It truly is food porn in the greatest way! Can I get one in the 50 Shades of Pork?!? This are some bad things that I want to do to some ham hocks!!! (I have seen the 50 shades of bacon but I don't think it is done to the same quality or by the same people based on the amazon preview I can look at)

To the person that gave this book 3 stars because it is gross to think of your food sexually... Lighten up.. No one was implying that you sick a drumstick in your gigi. Although you might want to take the stick out of your... oh never mind!!
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27 of 31 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Need a napkin, please.... November 28, 2012
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
Fifty Shades of Chicken left me hungry and wanting for more. At first blush, I wanted to be that chicken.. to be touched and marinated. Cooked. I wanted Shifty Blades to want me every day.
This book is more than just a parody. It draws the reader in with breathy stories and succulent recipes. Absolutely finger licking delicious. And Julia, she is behind it all. Tsk.Tsk.
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Awesome! November 27, 2012
By Laura S
Format:Hardcover|Verified Purchase
This is a great value. High quality hard cover book, it will make a great funny Christmas present for friends that cook.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars This book rules February 1, 2013
Format:Hardcover|Verified Purchase
Need I say more?

I bought this as a Christmas gift for my sister-in-law and she died laughing. She loves to cook, she loves the original Fifty Shades and now she Loves her new cook book.

This is definitely a gift that keeps on giving!
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars All things beautiful.... November 27, 2012
Format:Hardcover|Verified Purchase
.... come in sleek little packages. The book looks beautiful and skimming through it was a treat. It fit the NPR review. Thanks very much!
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9 of 12 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Terrific Gift November 16, 2012
Format:Hardcover|Verified Purchase
This is a gift for my sister. I read about this book in the newspaper and it sounded cute. Although, once it arrived I could see it is even better. I look forward to her reaction when she opens the gift, and then begins to read the book/look at its pictures.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
Great gag gift for a friends bachelorette party! Plus awesome recipes.
Published 2 days ago by Kassie
1.0 out of 5 stars Disgusting!
A disgusting mockery of the murder of innocent animals!
Published 3 days ago by Debbie Bemister
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
Hilarious, I ordered a few to keep for future gifts to friends.
Published 8 days ago by Lauryn
5.0 out of 5 stars It's a very fun, entertaining book
It's a very fun, entertaining book. I got it as a joke, and I wasn't quite expecting as good recipes, that this book offered.
Really impressed,
Five stars.
Published 12 days ago by Ben Pratt
5.0 out of 5 stars Perfect gift
This was such a great gift for a secret santa. The recipes actually look great! I recommend this.
Published 14 days ago by Shauna Tara
5.0 out of 5 stars Damn! Look at that guy... I mean chicken... Totally meant chicken ;)
This book is HILARIOUS! I gave it to one of my best friends for her birthday and she busted out laughing in the middle of a restaurant for 5 minutes XD I've never been so excited... Read more
Published 20 days ago by stephanie
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
funny gift. give for a Bride...
Published 23 days ago by ME Sims
4.0 out of 5 stars Four Stars
What recipes I have tried have been really tasty. Who knew?
Published 26 days ago by Jane M. Taylor
5.0 out of 5 stars ... received this book as a gift and I absolutely loved it. The...
I received this book as a gift and I absolutely loved it. The descriptions of chef preparing chicken was sensual and steamy. Not to mention absolutely hilarious! Read more
Published 1 month ago by MVS
4.0 out of 5 stars Unique chicken recipes
If you like chicken recipes, there are several imaginative examples which makes the book valuable.
Published 1 month ago by chathcock
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