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Fifty Shades of Gravy [Kindle Edition]

Jenny Ric
3.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (16 customer reviews)

Kindle Price: $0.99
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Book Description

When culinary student Vanessa Biscuits attends cooking class with renowned chef Chef Gray, she encounters a man who is beautiful, brilliant, and intimidating. The unworldly, innocent Vanessa is startled to realize she wants this man and, despite his enigmatic reserve, finds she is desperate. For so many things. Desperate for Chef Gray, desperate for a semblance of a personality, desperate for a dimension that makes her deeper than the average puddle.

Fortunately for Vanessa she is spared the need to become in any way interesting in her own right. Unable to resist her pedestrian beauty, half wittedness, bland spirit and slavish, dog like devotion Gray admits he wants her on his own terms – covered in gravy.

Fifty Shades of Gravy is a tale that will obsess you, repossess your furniture and stay with you forever no matter how many eviction notices you serve it.

Product Details

  • File Size: 58 KB
  • Simultaneous Device Usage: Unlimited
  • Publisher: Generic Books (May 9, 2012)
  • Sold by: Amazon Digital Services, Inc.
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B00820LRAC
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Word Wise: Not Enabled
  • Lending: Enabled
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #658,163 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
18 of 20 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Oh my, golly gosh darn May 11, 2012
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
At the moment, "Fifty Shades of Grey" is the book people love to hate -- it's bad, it's silly, it's a fanfic based on "Twilight"... and it's hilarious.

So it was inevitable that there would be a parody of it. And "Fifty Shades of Gravy" is a pretty decent parody, lampooning the sort of useless, vapid, excessively virginal heroines that star in "Fifty Shades of Grey" and "Twilight"... not to mention the chiseled, abusive love interests with cheeks like "slabs of granite."

Vanessa Biscuits is a 22-year-old girl who is (naturally) the most gorgeous woman around, completely virginal, and has "the sensibilities and understanding of the world of a fifty-year-old woman." She lives with her dad Charlton in the town of Sporks, because "I have to live with one of my parents because I have all the independence of a marshmallow bunny.'

But one day at culinary school, surrounded by sexless personality-free drones, Vanessa sees... HIM.

"Him" is the devastating sexy Chef Grey, who is there to teach them about making bread... and to demonstrate kneading technique in a, um, very unorthodox way. Vanessa's "down there nether regions" tingle furiously for Grey... but she does not know the bizarre sexual desires that only she can satisfy! And no, I am not going to mention what they are.

"Fifty Shades of Gravy" is a pretty brief parody, but Jenny Ric packs a lot of spoofery into it -- especially since it not only spoofs "50 Shades of Grey" (Grey whips Vanessa with a string of sausages) but also the wretched "Twilight" books (he creeps into her bedroom at night... wearing a chef's hat). It's just a lot of snarky fun.

Ric takes particular aim at the virginal, prematurely middle-aged, vapid, horny girls at the center of both books.
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10 of 12 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars ..."Gonna Season You Right..." May 11, 2012
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
What do you get when you take Twilight, add some re-worked Twilight fanfic and then snark the heck outta both of them?


Fifty Shades Of Gravy is one of the funniest spoofs you'll read this year. I even spewed a few servings of brown stuff myself a few times while reading it (coffee, that is).

Our heroine, Vanessa Biscuits, a self-absorbed young lady who's obsessed with Wuthering Heights and lives with her father, attends Culinary School in the small town of Sporks, which is often dry and sunny but sometimes wet and humid. The newest teacher, Chef Gray, makes her lady parts quiver and as he's immediately drawn to her as well, gives her a private lesson on kneading buns.

The funniest scene had to be when Chef gets to creepily stalk Vanessa in her bedroom, just the way every tween girl dreams of. She's willing to indulge his manly advances but he'll only have her on his terms...

This. Is. Funny.
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6 of 8 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars LOL Worthy May 11, 2012
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
Yes, I did laugh out loud a few times. Fifty Shades of Gravy is a silly parody but I think the author gave too much away in the book description. It is worth the 5 minutes of reading time for the laughs and bad writing. Good job!
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5.0 out of 5 stars can't wait for the movie May 1, 2013
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
I love this book I canno wait until the movie comes out. I will make sure that I go an see it with my friends
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1.0 out of 5 stars Overrated trash! March 21, 2013
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
I fail to understand the continuing popularity of this book. It is poorly written. Gratuitous sexuality veiled in the weakest of plots leaves me cold. There are so many great books out there, well-written, with sexual content that flows with the story, I chose this book because of its "popularity," and I feel cheated.
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1.0 out of 5 stars horrible February 12, 2013
Format:Kindle Edition
Is not a very good parody. The writer needs to reread the original and try again. They also need to look up the word parody, reread their book, and see if they really believe that it is a parody of the original.
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2.0 out of 5 stars Odd December 2, 2012
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
I knew going into it it was going to be quirky, but this book is just weird! It just really was not worth downloading, & I am pretty easy to please when it comes to books!
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3.0 out of 5 stars huh? November 21, 2012
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
i have read most of the "fifty shades" parodies and some are quite good...this is not one of them...she tries too hard to emulate the original....not really funny
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
1.0 out of 5 stars Fifty Shades og Gravy
50 Shades if Gravy - not every a good parody, deleted, did not and would not recommend to anyone, waste of valuable reading time
Published on January 20, 2013 by HGB
1.0 out of 5 stars Terrible
Do not waste your money on this short story. This is the worst thing I've ever read in my life.
Just terrible.
Published on November 15, 2012 by Kindle Reader 6
3.0 out of 5 stars entertaining but too short
A spinoff from FIFTY SHADES OF GREY. Entertaining but too short. It's ok. I've read a lot better spinoffs before.
Published on November 5, 2012 by Amazon Customer
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Star Gravy!
In this send-up Ric treats up to a slight mash-up of Twilight and Fifty Shades Of Grey set in a culinary school, where the dumb and ditzy Vanessa Biscuits falls under the spell of... Read more
Published on September 15, 2012 by Master_Vyle
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent parody
Oh my...this is hilarious!It made me laugh throughout the time.Now, I don't regret having read the original book,because if I hadn't I wouldn't have enjoyed this parody so much. Read more
Published on September 1, 2012 by Elena
5.0 out of 5 stars Fifty Shades Of ... Hilarious
One word describes this brief parody of Fifty Shades Of Grey - hilarious.
Jenny Ric tells the entire story with lots of laughs in about 30 pages, compared to the original... Read more
Published on June 27, 2012 by Mouse
1.0 out of 5 stars Two words: not funny
This is a short (10-15 pages?) story meant to poke fun at the Fifty series, but the humor wasn't there nor was there much parody to Fifty Shades of Grey. Not worth the . Read more
Published on May 20, 2012 by Karlyn - Taxidermy for the Ladies
5.0 out of 5 stars redemption
i think the other reviewers missed the message under the humorous, sarcastic snark. this is a story of innocence redeeming the cruel but wounded Chef. OMG! i cried! i laughed! Read more
Published on May 12, 2012 by Coyote Rising
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