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Fighting for Your Marriage: A Deluxe Revised Edition of the Classic Best-seller for Enhancing Marriage and Preventing Divorce Paperback – April 26, 2010


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Fighting for Your Marriage: A Deluxe Revised Edition of the Classic Best-seller for Enhancing Marriage and Preventing Divorce + How to Avoid Falling in Love with a Jerk + The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country's Foremost Relationship Expert
Price for all three: $39.01

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Product Details

  • Paperback: 464 pages
  • Publisher: Jossey-Bass; 3 edition (April 26, 2010)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0470485914
  • ISBN-13: 978-0470485910
  • Product Dimensions: 9 x 6.6 x 1.2 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1.3 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (41 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #33,746 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

Review

"The authors provide an encyclopedia-like wealth of information, from escaping destructive patterns to controlling conflict to playing together." (Library Journal, May 15, 2010)

From the Back Cover

Since 1994, the best-selling classic Fighting for Your Marriage has been the go-to reference for couples that want to enhance their marriage and prevent divorce. This thoroughly revised and updated third edition (which contains a new instructional DVD for couples) is based on the widely acclaimed PREP (Prevention and Relationship Enhancement Program) approach. Groundbreaking studies have found that couples who use the strategies of this proven approach are able to handle conflict more constructively, protect their happiness, and reduce the odds of breaking up.

The authors have included a wealth of proven, research-based techniques and down-to-earth guidance for all couples who seek to promote greater character and pleasure in their long-term relationships.

Praise for Fighting for Your Marriage

"A divorce prevention society should be formed to place a copy of this book in every hotel room in this country. Every wife or husband struggling to stay married, especially happily married, should read this book."
Maggie Gallagher, coauthor, The Case for Marriage: Why Married People Are Happier, Healthier, and Better Off Financially

"I love this book! If you want to be happily, successfully married, buy it, master it, and it's all you'll ever need. While you're at it, buy a copy for every couple you love. You won't need one for your kids, they'll learn by watching you."
Diane Sollee, founder and director, Coalition for Marriage, Family and Couples Education

Customer Reviews

Great, informative book every couple should read to get a troubled marriage back on track.
BigE
This book is great because you can read it out of order and it still gives you ideas on how to help your marriage.
Kumu Kaiapuni Hawaii
It is very well written, easy to read and even humorous to keep interest and a good attitude while reading it.
Aubrey Prunty

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

10 of 11 people found the following review helpful By Carolyn K. Patterson on September 13, 2010
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
"Fighting for Your Marriage" is a great book. I not only saw how my husband reacts to situations, but also saw myself very clearly. I have begun to correct my attitude and how I approach issues and have noticed a better response from him. Great exercises. I recommend this book to anyone just starting out or those individuals who have been married a long time and are struggling.
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19 of 24 people found the following review helpful By Allan M. Lees on August 8, 2010
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Sadly I discovered this book too late for my own marriage - my wife had already gone by the time I read this. I'd worked hard on the relationship for over six years, but in retrospect I can see we both lacked crucial skills and insights, though it's probable that in the end nothing will save a relationship under certain circumstances. But for those times when things are in the balance and the right steps can make all the difference, this is the book to read.

Like all self-help books it takes nearly 300 pages to say what could be said in 15, but that's par for the course and no doubt many people will find it helpful to take the time to get through the repetitions and iterations. I found each section of the book to contain something of value, and at many times during the book I found myself thinking "I wish I'd thought of that" or "I wish we'd had this tool" and in general little was silly or wrong aside from two supposed "facts." The first is that, according to the authors, research shows people who live together before getting married have less successful marriages than those that marry before living together. I've seen a lot of data over the years and I know this claim to be based on a very incomplete understanding of what the data actually reveals. In Europe, for example, there have been several well-designed studies that clearly show couples who live together for at least 18 months prior to marriage have both happier and longer-lasting relationships. The second error is the statement that couples who have strong religious beliefs have happier marriages. Again, I'm not aware of this being the case from real-world data and the examples cited by the authors in the appendix are, upon closer inspection, flawed and highly selective.
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5 of 5 people found the following review helpful By Dandelion on November 29, 2012
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
Great book. Takes some time to do the reading and exercises but after 18 yrs of marriage this book offered new perspectives on couple communication. I have read other cookie cutter books but this one had real applicable exercises and small daily tips to boosting smooth understanding of one another and "fighting fair" tips that were golden.

I have always known that any relationship worth keeping is going to take some detours from smooth sailing and I wish I had read this book before my first romantic relationship. However reading aloud to one another was a great bonding experience for my verteran marriage! Some chapters were rough...ones we noticed touched on our specific struggles while others egnited old passions and were full of fun!
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6 of 7 people found the following review helpful By Andrew P. Sholtes on August 21, 2013
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
I was certified by PREP in 1997 by one of the Authors of this book, by Dr. Stanley. I have held many seminars based on this book to close to a thousand couples. This is still a book, after so many editions that speaks to the topic most effectively, regardless of gender, cultural or educational background.
We all should fight for our marriage! It takes a consciencious effort to maintain a mutually nurturing relationship. It just does not happen miraculously by itself. Being in love is a good start but it is hardly enought many years down the road.
The imprimis of the book is that conflict resolution skills are the most important in a stable marriage. Conflict will occur in every relationship. How well we can resolve them will determine the quality of relationship.
This book has repaired and saved many marriages in my 16 years of marriage counseling. I always have free copies in my office and encourage every couple to get their own copies and read them. It also worked with couples who were separated by great distance, such as military deployment. Each spouse got their own copy and read it in sync while they were apart. I am familiar with some of the other popular books on this subject. Some are excellent, some are rubbish, but this is the most comprehensive. I also know that it actually works.
Reading this book BEFORE getting married could be the mandatory seatbelt law of marriages... So buckle in!
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By Tallrey on May 27, 2014
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
The only problem with this book is that I do not seem to be able to hang onto it. :-) I keep buying them and giving them to married couples or to engaged couples. I have led a couple's ministry in my church and therefore have read tons of relationship books. This is the best I have read. This particular copy I bought for my engaged daughter and future son in law. I think it is a must read for any couple.
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3 of 4 people found the following review helpful By helluvagoodnews on June 9, 2014
Format: Paperback
The 20th and 21st centuries has shown us a change in the trends of marriage; people are marrying total strangers, for very stupid and self-serving reasons, and people are quick to just throw a relationship away when it becomes even a tad hard. Let me just say that I am a flawed individual when it comes to dealing with my current relationship. My partner and I would fight a lot, by withdrawing or by becoming very aggressive. We would fight like cats and dogs and many times I have contemplated to just walk away from him forever. It was all too much. He never let me go, of course, always clinging onto me with tears in his eyes. We love each other but we just do not know how to fight fair.

That's where this book comes in to the rescue.

I read the entire thing, cover to cover, and have implemented it's exercises to my relationship. I cannot stress this enough, but the exercises are simply magical. The screaming matches were over; we no longer withdrew from each other. Sure, there has been a couple of relapses, but they get shorter and less intense each time. The Speaker-Listener Technique is a MIRACLE to do in our communication. Like I said, we still have some work to do, but the difference between how we used to be (fighting, screaming, etc) to how we talk now is like day and night. I realize that nothing is more important than the health of our relationship as well as my partner as a whole human being, with wants and needs just like I do. I honor my commitment with him and now I cannot imagine ever desiring a divorce or separation from him, and we're not even married yet! (We are engaged.)

Too often, the media tells us to just go through relationships like we do with clothes. It might be fun for the short-term, but does it really make you happy deep down?
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