Customer Reviews

Finding Forgiveness: A Seven-Step Program for Letting Go of Anger and Bitterness

5 star:		(6)
4 star:		(1)
3 star:		(0)
2 star:		(2)
1 star:		(1)

 

 

This book helped me immensely. I learned steps to forgive in ways that were helpful without blame. The stories of individuals in each chapter helped illustrate how to approach a very tough subject. And Dr. Borris' suggestions really made sense. A very powerful approach! I highly recommend it.

It is no wonder to me why this book was choosen as one of the finalist for the "Books for a Better Life Award". Dr. Borris approachs a difficult subject with compassion and common sense. She is able to communicate the value of forgiveness to the forgiver without losing site of the pain the individual suffered.

This book provides a very practical stepped process to transform destructive emotions, extreme suffering, and trauma into a powerful sense of justice and love. This book outlines complex cycles of violence (both physical and psychological) and illustrates how they can be redirected to personal and collective courage and healing. The key, however, to this book is the need to participate in the rating system, uncover the grief, and heal the traumas through the discipline of the exercises and practices suggested.

I must admit that when I began reading Dr. Borris' book, "Finding Forgiveness," I thought it would be another self-help book that provided trite suggestions. Instead, I found a book that was absorbing and profound. Moreover, it delivered practical information that has improved my life. Following the steps outlined in the book, I was able to resolve an old family wound. I have recommended this book to several of my colleagues who have also benefitted from this book's wisdom.

This is one of the best books on forgiveness I've ever read. The seven steps are in a useful order to start working through whatever issue you have. It is more designed for hardcore forgiveness, for those acts that have ravaged someone's life.

Some forgiveness books seem to focus on how to develop a forgiving mindset and let go of those little wrongs committed by others, that don't damage your life but cause resentments; this in itself is important.

Finding Forgiveness is when there is a cycle in someone's life. Something terrible has happened to them and as a result they become angry, twisted people at times harming others. This is the right book for those who have to overcome and transcend great personal adversity. It is a book that is to be studied and applied to your life rather than just read and reflected on.

Healing advice for the entire planet! Dr. Borris is genuinely compassionate and insightful in her writing about the ultimate expressions of forgiveness. Her experience in the world of healing and forgiveness is invaluable!! A wonderful read and a very important read. I highly recommend this book to everyone and anyone looking to find forgiveness and inner peace!!

I bought this book for my sister whose behavior has broken up our family. I browsed the content before purchasing it and it seems like a perfect fit for her. I'm hoping it will change her way of thinking. If this book can help our family get back together I will post the results. I gave this to her for Christmas and hope she is reading it.

The tone of this authors voice grated on my nerves from the beginning, and I had to set it down a short way in. She seemed condescending. I think her premise is probably quite good but I could not get past her style.

It was pretty good till I got to chapter 8 titled "stop running and face your guilt". I found it impossible to relate to this man and equally impossible to find ANY sympathy for him once I read that he molested his oldest son. And to have this man write about overcoming guilt and forgiving himself and being one with the universe...I could have puked. There is absolutely no freaking way I am finishing this book and I DO NOT recommend it to anyone!

First off, I'm always wary of books written by PHD's. They tend to be overly academic and not based with real world experience. This book even has "rating scales" for each aspect...as if you can actually put a number on these things. This book tries to be practical and spiritual. And is disjuncted because of that. There is a lot of confusion and overly wordiness that makes it hard to understand. The part that's more spiritual where its just stories being told is much more coherent.

The seven steps outlined in the description are significantly different than in the book. The one's in the book are not at all clear or compelling. Here they are:

1. Becoming clear.

2. Telling your story.

3. Working with anger.

4 Working with guilt.

5. Reframing the situation

6. Absorbing pain.

7. Gaining inner peace.

The explanations for each are confusing and not helpful. In fact if the first 40 pages were edited for clarity and simplicity you could sell that as an informative short book. (If you want a good book on anger that works check out Marshall Rosenbergs book) There are also contradictory statements in the book. She will say "People don't know the meaning of forgiveness." Then two sentences later she will say, "Everyone has to decide there own meaning of forgiveness." (I agree with the reviewer who says the authors tone is condesending.)

The problem is the first 41 pages are practical and the rest of the book are stories of different people. The practical steps were not useful. I did gain some insights from the stories, but I feel like the book is misrepresented. The book doesn't fulfill on any of the promises made on the descrip or even on the book jacket.

All in all it doesn't seem like a worthwhile model to follow. If you are looking for a spiritual book on forgiveness, this might be a good book for you. If you are looking for a book that helps you deal with your anger, not so much.