Customer Reviews

Finding Purpose Beyond Our Pain: Uncover the Hidden Potential in Life's Most Common Struggles

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If you are the type of person who writes notes in margins and uses a highlighter, this is the book for you. I promise you will have something on every page. It has taken me a long time to review this book because it is just packed with excellent information that comes to you straight from scripture. I love scripture and I really love it when someone gives me their example of how to apply it to life-now in this place and time. If you are not a Christian and you have wondered what exactly Christians believe, this book will tell it to you in the very beginning. If you are a Christian and you want to impact someone's life who is struggling, recommend this book to them.

Whatever your pain, whatever your struggle-this book will address it. AND, it will guide you in the right steps to move past it and find the purpose and calling God has for you. It encourages you to explore the things God means for you to accomplish for the Kingdom-once you can move beyond the pain that cripples you.

My favorite part of the book, because I am a grown up middle schooler, is where he compares our lives to a toilet. Sin is the nastiness in the toilet. Why do we let it collect and stink and be disgusting when God will flush it away if we allow Him? Okay-that is not a direct quote, but you get the idea. AND, it is a really good analogy.
This one joins "How to Love Someone You Can't Stand" in my constant re-reading status. One of those books you need to read, wait a while and then come back and read it again.

Finding Purpose Beyond our pain is a very balanced and helpful look at why God allows pain in the world. When we are in the midst of a difficult life situation, we are often tempted to ask the question: Why me, God? This book gives an answer.

Pain is an opportunity to grow and to find a better relationship with Jesus. I found the book quite balanced. It provides a framework to look at your life situation and try to see the lessons behind your present troubles. The authors have chosen to deal with several of the most difficult life situations: injustice, rejection, loneliness, loss, discipline, failure and death. In each case, they discuss their experiences with real people experiencing these problems and finding in them an opportunity for growth.

I don't believe this book is the perfect antidote to suffering, but I do think that it has a positive message that can help the sufferer bear his trials and learn from them. I found it a very hopeful book. I'm sure that people can argue with the theology, but the underlying message is clear: Don't wallow in your pain; use it as an impetus to improve your outlook on life.

How many times have we asked questions like, "Why did God allow that innocent child to be abused?" "How can I deal with this failure?" or "How can I live without my spouse?"

Meier deals with these questions and more in his latest book, Finding Purpose Beyond Our Pain. As Meier says, everyone deals with struggles of some kind, whether it's injustice, rejection, loneliness, loss, discipline, failure or death. Meier uses this book to explain not only how to get through these struggles, but how to grow through them.

As someone who has experienced pain and who came out of a church where "struggles happen only to those whose faith is weak or who are out of God's will," I was interested in reading how Meier would explain these struggles and what his suggestions would be to overcome them.

I was not disappointed. Using interesting stories, he quickly identified with pain and demonstrated how it feels to experience pain. He then explained how pain could affect us emotionally, physically and mentally; and what happens if we are unable to move through it. Finally, he provides sound advice and solid Biblical teaching to help us not only overcome the pain, but also to use our pain for the good of others.

In short, Meier's book gave me hope; and as Romans 5:5 says, hope does not disappoint. I recommend this book for anyone going through the struggles of life.

This book helps people understand and act on the potential for growth through seven common sources of pain in life. Biblically based but with practical approaches to dealing with injustice, rejection, loneliness, loss, discipline, failure, and death, the authors challenge us to discover the lessons a loving God is teaching. Readers can grow in appreciation of how God works in their lives, drawing closer to Him through the unpleasant and sometimes devastating circumstances we all suffer because of our fallen nature.

Smoothly written and logically composed, it offers the flexibility of going directly to sections of interest, losing nothing when bypassing previous sections. Moreover, the "Finding Purpose Beyond..." suggestions and challenges at the end of each section help to focus on moving toward real happiness through the suffering we cannot escape. I found the content of this feature very thought-provoking and helpful.

Engaging stories of individuals the authors have treated in their practices illustrate their points and enliven the writing along with appropriate Biblical quotes. I highly recommend this book to people looking for answers to circumstances troubling them, wondering where God is in all of it, and how life can be better.

[...]

* Hardcover: 304 pages
* Publisher: Thomas Nelson (November 3, 2009)
* Language: English
* ISBN-10: 0785229221
* ISBN-13: 978-0785229223

'I cannot contain my approval of this book. There is truth here that every Christian needs to read and understand. In this book the authors take us on a journey through scripture and what God taught related to the pain that inevitably comes into every life.

There is no way to avoid the things that life brings, such as death. Every person who lives very long will experience the death of those they know and love and eventually we will all have to deal with our own death in this world. This book will help you to understand how we can grow and become mature in our faith as face these difficult times.

Losing a job, suffering an illness or that of a loved one, disease, divorce, etc... We live in a fallen world but the authors of this book help us to find meaning and purpose in every situation we will face in this life and the benefits for the life to come. There really is a purpose and a plan in God's economy.

Too many people today are living depressed and discouraged because of what they have had to face in life as well as the many who are losing hope because of the fear of what they will have to face in the future. This book is for you. Get it, devour it, share it. Every page has something you can use to understand life and the struggles we face.

This book will remain in my library to help those who come for counsel and I will read it over and over, not only to help others but to remind myself, God really does understand and care, there really is a plan in the madness.

Ronnie

I began reading Finding Purpose Beyond Our Pain: Uncover the Hidden Potential in Life's Most Common Struggles well over a month ago. I've sticky markers throughout it, and I wish I could share so much with you - but, instead, I hope I can encourage you to put this at the top of your reading list for this year. As Christians we all go through pain or watch dear loved ones go through deep valleys. I was concerned at first, the viewpoint coming from the authors, two psychiatrists - Dr. Paul Meier and Dr. David L. Henderson. But it is so Scripture-filled and hit me in so many areas of my life.

On the back cover of the book, it states a thought provking statement to encourage you to read:

"What if, instead of chasing after a pain-free existence, we saw adversity as an ally? A temporary companion who leads us away from danger and toward healing? A trainer who pushes us through to the next level of growth?"

The authors give encouragements in not just getting through pain and trials but how to grow through the seven common sources of pain in life: injustice, rejection, loneliness, loss, discipline, failure, and death. I appreciated the authors' thoughts on loneliness:

"You will never find complete relatedness in anyone else but God. He is the only one who can relate to us completely and who can heal us of the pain of loneliness. The indwelling of Christ into our humanity is what completes us, making us whole. Ironically, this is the starting point for developing healthy relatedness to others."

I've shared over the past five years on my blogs of the earthly loss of our son and daughter. One thing my husband and I have struggled with in the last year is the feeling of lost time . . . the long healing process and feeling like we missed out on so much with our family as we healed through a fog. I loved this assurance:

"Perhaps you are mourning over lost time. Be encouraged, knowing that God does not operate under the constraints of human scheduling. He can use even "wasted time" for His glory if we give it over to Him. He can bring meaning and purpose to our lives, no matter what time we have left on earth."

And this on losses:

"God always has a purpose for our losses, and His purposes are motivated out of a genuine longing to see us gain what is greater . . . Job's losses were horrific and extremely painful. We would not wish them on anyone, and neither would Job. Yet Job is having a great time up in heaven right now, perhaps reflecting on earthly life and thinking, Wow, it was worth all that temporary pain to have a book of the Bible written about it that has helped millions of sufferers to learn from their pain and quit guilt tripping over it. If you knew your current losses and pain would one day accomplish great things, not just in your life but the lives of many others, would a life of loss be worth living to you?"

Throughout Finding Purpose Beyond Our Pain: Uncover the Hidden Potential in Life's Most Common Struggles are stories of real people these authors counseled in their practices to illustrate their points, show life changes and how God and His Word can heal. This is a book I will be recommending.

This book was provided for review by Thomas Nelson Publishers and this review expresses my honest opinion.

The premise of this book is that our pain can set the stage for amazing accomplishments and personal growth. In 270 pages, Paul Meier and David Henderson take the reader through a discussion of common sources of suffering: injustice, rejection, loneliness, loss, discipline, failure, and death. Ideas are punctuated with stories from their own lives and the lives of people they have known.

The stories add weight and validity to the principles Meier and Henderson teach. For me, that was the best part of the book. I especially loved the stories from their families.

But I had a hard time finishing the book. In places, I had to work to be engaged. For 270 pages, I tried to understand why. These authors have a wealth of experience and many valuable things to teach. Their stories are great. Why did my mind wander and my interest sputter like a candle flame in the wind?

I decided, near the end, that the book tries to do too much. It tries to be a one-size-fits-all guide to pain for mankind. This creates an impossible goal. Pain is too personal for this approach. The authors risk the impression of pat and formulaic answers. The resolution of pain is very different for each type of wound. The answers are not the same for a widow mourning the loss of a beloved husband, a faithful employee who lost his job after 30 years, a returning war veteran, and an adult who was sexually abused as a child. Let me say it again: these are not the same.

There are principles that apply to every healing process, but pain is distinct and personal. The readers seeking real answers to hard questions will be disappointed. And that's precisely the problem. The readers of this book will likely be individuals who have experienced a lot of pain.
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As a Book Review Blogger for Thomas Nelson, I received a complimentary copy of this book. Thomas Nelson Book Review Bloggers has recently acquired a new name: BookSneeze.

Pain is not the enemy, but a catalyst for growth. That is the premise of FINDING PURPOSE BEYOND OUR PAIN. The authors help the reader get past the physical and emotional pain in their lives by focusing on what we can learn from the painful experience and how it can help them grow and change.

I found this premise interesting. I've not been through a lot of physical pain, but much emotional pain, and I can attest that being open to change and learning through the experiences did help me to grow both emotionally and spiritually. My husband has found the same in his daily physical pain due to a serious neck injury.

The book was thought provoking and easy to read. I highly recommend it.

It is an awesome book that talks about the things in life that we can't control and how to use those things as positives rather than negatives. It explains why God allows pain and suffering and how to not just ask why but to use it to draw closer to Him to get through these things. Very well written. Pain is an opportunity to grow and to find a better relationship with Jesus. I found the book quite balanced. It provides a framework to look at your life situation and try to see the lessons behind your present troubles. The authors have chosen to deal with several of the most difficult life situations: injustice, rejection, loneliness, loss, discipline, failure and death. In each case, they discuss their experiences with real people experiencing these problems and finding in them an opportunity for growth.
Personally I felt this book really helped explain why and how to use that pain for good. Awesome book. Glad I was given the chance to read it.

Title: Finding Purpose Beyond Our Pain: Uncover the Hidden Potential in Life's Most Common Struggles
Authors: Paul Meier, M.D. and David L. Henderson, M.D.
Publisher: Thomas Nelson, 2009
281 pp. (incl. Notes)

Every now and then I read a book that is so full of wisdom, insight, encouragement, or other life-enhancing power that I want to stay with this sentence or that paragraph. As I continue reading, I may want to stop to explore further what I've just read and how it might apply in my life. Reading Finding Purpose... was like that, for me, and I have some revisiting to do. This book should have a place in every home, because none of us escapes the pains of life.

Drs. Meier and Henderson focus on seven major "universal struggles": Injustice, Rejection, Loneliness, Loss, Discipline, Failure, and Death. Each section contains four chapters offering insights, perspective, and stories of individuals who experienced the type of struggle being discussed. Each section stands alone, so the book can be read as needed, when we find ourselves dealing with any of these seven common sources of pain.

What Meier and Henderson want us to grasp is that "pain is not the enemy" (p. xv) and that, if we will look and listen for God's perspective, we can find the "light beyond our most common struggles" (p. xvii).

As I write this, I am thinking of a disaster that occurred on Interstate 10, in Arizona, just one week ago, as a result of a major dust storm. A series of crashes involving 20 vehicles left at least three people dead, including two teen siblings, and many injuries. We had just driven through the same dust storm and were perhaps a mile beyond, when the crashes occurred.

When I think about the individuals whose lives were forever changed, in those brief moments, I can well imagine that those whose loved ones are gone are grieving, today, from the loss, the deaths, the seeming injustice and apparent lack of purpose to it all. Many will experience the loneliness of separation from loved ones, along with the physical and emotional pain of their injuries.

Finding Purpose... speaks to these and other pains and points us, always, to God, to seek His comfort and to cooperate with Him in finding that purpose that will bring meaning and healing to our lives. The authors do not minimize the realities of pain or spout spiritual pablum. Their approach is spiritual, in that they write as Christians who have personally experienced these same struggles; it is also practical, drawing on their mutual experience as psychiatrists who, every day, listen to and work with individuals who are dealing with pain in any of its manifestations.

So "[t]he next time you experience pain, find the perfecting purpose it plays in your future--beyond the pain[--]and use that powerful knowledge to endure the pain today. . . . Don't give out; don't give in; don't give up until you have found it" (p. 278).