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Firstborn Advantage, The: Making Your Birth Order Work for You Hardcover – Bargain Price, September 1, 2008


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Product Details

  • Hardcover: 288 pages
  • Publisher: Revell (September 1, 2008)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0800719115
  • ASIN: B002MAQTMO
  • Product Dimensions: 8.6 x 5.5 x 1.1 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (51 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #449,528 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

What do Jennifer Aniston and Angelina Jolie have in common? And how do they share that certain something with Ulysses S. Grant? They're all first-borns, and in this breezy book, psychologist and birth order expert Leman delves into how birth order influences the first-born personality and upends some conventional thinking (e.g., only children and the first child of either sex is automatically a first-born—hence Jolie who has an elder brother can be classified as such) and illustrates first-borns' classic traits: reliability, perfectionism, a penchant for list making and black-and-white thinking, some social introversion but strong leadership abilities. Gender, parental treatment and family size are just as important as chronology, argues the author, who does an admirable job balancing the hope and hype of familial ranking and integrates compelling theories about how schooling and relationships work to address how first-borns can maximize desirable personality traits and minimize liabilities. His spirited and exceptionally easy read will appeal to those readers interested in understanding better whence they came and how to move forward with success. (Sept.)
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

From the Inside Flap

How can you put your firstborn tendencies to work for you? The Firstborn Advantage reveals the secrets. In this fascinating book, bestselling author, humorist, and psychologist Dr. Kevin Leman shows you how to • take advantage of being a firstborn • overcome the perfectionism that holds you back • learn how to bounce back when you fail • find balance in your work and relationships • find out what you really want from life • motivate your children to do well in school without doing their homework for them • relate to others who are not firstborns--a spouse, a friend, a co-worker Whether you are the firstborn in your family or the functional firstborn, The Firstborn Advantage can help you win every time, all the time, without sacrificing your dreams in the process. Dr. Leman shows you how it's done.

More About the Author

Dr. Kevin Leman, an internationally known psychologist, radio and television personality, and speaker, has taught and entertained audiences worldwide with his wit and commonsense psychology. The best-selling and award-winning author has made house calls for hundreds of radio and television programs, including "The View" with Barbara Walters, "The Today Show," "Oprah," CBS's "The Early Show," "Live with Regis Philbin," CNN's "American Morning," and "LIFE Today" with James Robison, and he has served as a contributing family psychologist to "Good Morning America." He is the founder and president of Couples of Promise, an organization designed and committed to helping couples remain happily married. Dr. Leman is also a charter faculty member of iQuestions.com. He has written over 30 best-selling books about marriage and family issues, including "The Birth Order Book" and "Sheet Music: Uncovering the Secrets of Sexual Intimacy in Marriage." Dr. Leman and his wife, Sande, live in Tucson. They have five children.

Customer Reviews

4.7 out of 5 stars
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This book is an easy and great read.
Stacy Harp
This book helped me to understand myself, and even laugh at some of the things I say and the reason why I want everything just so.
Mrs. Val G. Gordon
In THE FIRSTBORN ADVANTAGE, bestselling author Dr. Kevin Leman helps firstborns make the very most of their birth order.
FaithfulReader.com

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

Format: Hardcover
What's your birth order? Were you a firstborn, middle child or the baby of the family? Were you an only child? No matter what your birth order, odds are that it's affecting you more than you realize. In THE FIRSTBORN ADVANTAGE, bestselling author Dr. Kevin Leman helps firstborns make the very most of their birth order. Here's the fascinating twist in Leman's assessment: birth order not only deals with the ordinal position of a child but also his or her functional birth position. This means that even if you aren't the oldest in a family, you still may have firstborn tendencies that affect your outlook and approach to life.

Leman points to a variety of variables that play into birth order. For example, if you're from a large family, it's not just the oldest who is a firstborn; there are others with firstborn tendencies. The reasoning is that in a large family of six or eight or more children, the family divides down into subunits. So among the three or four youngest children, one may assume the role as the oldest.

In addition, gender can play a role in firstborn tendencies. Leman writes: "You don't have to be a rocket scientist to realize that if there are four boys and one girl in your family, there's something unique about one of your kids." He points out that both the oldest male and female could have firstborn traits. An age gap of five or more years can also create firstborn traits in a non-firstborn. Other factors that can influence these traits are blended families and significant mental or physical differences among children.

Why is this so important? Because even if you're not a firstborn, you may have firstborn traits. If so, this book is for you! In an easy-to-read manner, Leman takes a good look at the firstborn personality.
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10 of 11 people found the following review helpful By Stacy Harp on November 16, 2008
Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
I have heard Dr. Leman on numerous occasions on the radio, and after one such interview I decided to purchase a copy of his latest book The First Born Advantage.

This book is an easy and great read. It will offer you insight as to the weaknesses and strengths of being a first born child. It will encourage you and make you think, and most importantly, notice the people around you who are first born.

Buy it, you won't be disappointed.
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7 of 7 people found the following review helpful By irish girl on November 30, 2008
Format: Hardcover
I'm married to a super first born who always had me wondering about why he does what he does. After reading this book, I have a better understanding about him and how he operates. I see things differently now, after gaining more insight into what makes him so organized & business-like. I appreciated this book for what it offered me. Although I am the middle child in my family, I bought this book to help me understand my spouse and it really did. Great read. Funny. Insightful.
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5 of 5 people found the following review helpful By SweetSoulX on April 2, 2010
Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
Being a firstborn, I picked it up with skepticism. First off, I am not a regular practicer of Christian faiths, so like always, I approached with caution. But I was fairly impressed and didn't feel overwhelmed by religious reference. There were some references, of course, but not enough to clog the gears or harm the text.

The information inside is jam packed. You could read the whole thing in one sitting, but you won't because there are tons of details to pick up on and think through. Every two pages I quit reading so I can digest what the author just said and tweak things I feel need tweaking. It also explains a lot about others from other birth orders, allowing me to understand better what my younger brother has perhaps experienced and I've only known through trying to glean information off of other not-firstborns in passing. It also told me how I'm strung, why I'm strung, and how to unstring myself more often in order to enjoy the things I am able to do.

A few things I wish it went over (or that the author had grown up books about) was more details about other siblings and what they experience. I'd have liked to have read more about what my siblings go through and been able to place why they respond to me in some ways that they do, but he has not written any books yet of this sort.
A few times he also goes off on tangents about personality traits that did not really relate to the discussion at hand. A part at about chapter 3 or 4 is more attempting to build courage in the reader to focus and become more capable as a person, but as he should already know, since we are already reading his book, it should be clear that we know what we want already and just think that a little housekeeping or inspiration will do, not a seven page "you're a good person" talk.
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5 of 5 people found the following review helpful By B. Wills on December 22, 2008
Format: Hardcover
Really good down to earth information on First Borns. What to do about being FB and what not to do. How to relate to other siblings and why.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful By grace williams on July 9, 2011
Format: Audio CD Verified Purchase
This audio cd is right on target. Dr. Leman, as usual, does an excellent job in pinpointing the myriad advantages of being the first born in the family. It is true that first borns which include us onlies are more mature, conscientious, and goal oriented than later born children.

Dr. Leman is an excellent theorist and practician regarding birth order typology. However, I learned something new about the psychology of the first born-there are people with first born and/or only child characteristics although they were not technically the first borns in their respective families.

I am an only and my mother is a first born. My mother was a typical first born-she loved being in charge and believed that she was always right. As a first born, she was often in conflict with superior staff because she believed that she knew more than they did. Even though we are close, we often clashed because of our strong personalities. I, too, believe that I am right and always gloat about it. I am also fiercely ambitious and believe in achieving the highest and if not, I would be miserable. The Firstborn Advantage is an excellent read and/or a good listen. It can be purchased in either book or cd form. Please purchase this enlightening treatise on the first born experience.
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