Customer Reviews

Five Conversations You Must Have with Your Daughter

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Vicki Courtney has written a wonderful resource for mothers. 5 Conversations You Must Have With Your Daughter is full of encouraging advice about how to approach the tough topics with your daughter at each stage of her growing up years. Topics like:

* Your are more than the sum of your body parts.
* Don't be in such a hurry to grow up.
* Sex is great and worth the wait.
* It's OK to dream about marriage and motherhood.
* Girls' gone wild are a dime a dozen - dare to be virtuous.

She not only shares her advice, but her experiences - both good and bad, and information from a lot research that helps you understand the battle we are facing in raising daughters.

While I personally do not agree with absolutely everything Vicki wrote (mostly technique or a particular approach) I would still highly recommend this book for any mom to read no matter how old your daughter is. I have always anticipated having these conversations with my daughters because I want to be the one to share with them rather then let them fall into the world's false beliefs.

I noticed that at times Vicki seemed to be ultra careful in one area and then more "liberal" in another compared to what I would be. When reading/listening to this book I highly suggest you think about the information given and prayerfully make changes in your family in agreement with your husband. I think you will find a lot of helpful information and ideas to aid you in being a better mother to your daughter(s).

The one and only negative I have on this book is that I really did not like the way that it was read on the audio version. However, it was not bad enough to cause me to stop listening. The one caution I have is to make sure you listen to it out of the hearing range of any children of any age. This is most definitely a book for mothers only.

* * * * *

This review copy was courtesy of Oasis Audio.

Reading this book has not only opened my eyes to the huge lies that society is forcing down our throats; but it has helped me to realize that I have been involved in teaching them to my own daughter! Mostly because I, too, have believed many of these lies; however, now that I see the truth, I am thankful that my own daughters are young enough that I can train them up in the ways of the Lord and teach them to save themselves--physically and emotionally--for a man who deserves them!

I would recommend this book to anyone with daughters and even to any female at all; undoubtedly, all females are helping to shape the lives of young girls around them. Whether they be neighbors, church members, neices or friend's daughters, this book is a clear, concise explanation of what has happened to society over the years, and further--how we can improve it!

I'm about 75% finished with this book. I bought it because I have a 6 yr old daughter and I work with the high school students in my church. Vicki does present some good facts and thoughts, and I've used those to facilitate some good conversations with both my family and my small group. However, I have to make an effort to read this book because I cannot stomach her judgemental attitude. Heaven forbid her good, Christian daughter would befriend a non-believer. Or that a teenager would buy a birthday gift for someone from Victoria's Secret (does she not know they have the most comfortable cotton panties? Or that VS's lotions and PJ's are a very popular bday gift?). Or that a "good, virtuous Christian girl" would not want to marry as soon as she graduates college... Again, good info, but I feel the need to work around some of the things presented here. I am literally needing to talk myself into finishing the book.

This book is clearly intended for moms, but this dad learned a lot.

I began reading this book on a plane during a business trip. Based on the title alone, no less than five flight attendants thanked me for reading it and expressed their wish that their fathers had read something similar. I was also approached by a couple of female passengers. None of my four flights passed without someone commenting on the book. Obviously, the topic of this book fills a need.

The author is unabashedly Christian, but her information and guidance are applicable regardless of your religious tendencies. If you're uncomfortable with Christianity, just mentally substitute "grandpa" for God and "Important Psychology Textbook" for Bible, and you'll discover that it really is universal. The author espouses her ideals but is careful to explain that each family and each daughter are different, and that an overly strict "one size fits all" approach will not be successful. She also accepts that every parent is imperfect, having made their own mistakes while growing up (and likely continuing to make mistakes). She admits her own mistakes and is very open about the abortion she had as a young woman. Obviously, this is not a woman who would disown her daughter for pre-marital sex or teen pregnancy, but she recognizes these are not the goals. This book offers great information and guidance on ways to reduce their likelihood.

What opened my eyes the most was the information on the effect of media on little girls. When I look at a covermodel on a magazine, I think "Wow, she's hot." I generally take little notice of the men on magazine covers (sorry, I'm just a typical guy). However, when young girls see a covermodel, they think "Ugh, I don't look like that, so I must need to diet, wear more make-up, dress more provocatively, etc." I was also surprised at just how much teen girls measure their self worth by the attention they get from boys. Talk about a recipe for eating disorders, teen sex, etc.

After reading the book (and several by Dannah Gresh on related topics), I have already begun these conversations with my daughters (7 and 5 yrs old). Before reading the books, I thought I could wait until my daughters were in their teens before having "the talk." Now I realize that there is not just "the talk," but rather many conversations that must start while they are young and must be ongoing. Just the other day, I showed my girls a magazine cover of Faith Hill and the original (before photoshop) version. They were amazed at how much "editing" was done for one of the most beautiful women in the world. They came away understanding that "nobody looks like the woman on the magazine...not even the woman on the magazine!" These conversations are just too important to risk the consequences of not having them.

This book is the perfect tool for parenting young girls. It is a common sense approach to helping our girls navigate through the rough waters of growing up and teaching them not to grow up too soon. Our children are constantly bombarded with lies from our culture and this Christian based book helps parents take control of teaching our girls to grow up in a Godly way. Much research was done for this book and the statistics she quotes will make you realize how culture has fooled our girls into believing and doing unthinkable things at such young ages. As in all of Vicki Courtney's books, you will find direction, support and comfort in parenting the right way, not the worldly way. Read this book and read it soon... no parent who takes a sincere interest in raising Godly women will want to parent one minute without it.

I loved this book. It taught me alot about myself and my childhood. It helped me to understand how to deal with future issues that I know I will come across with my two daughters. The author never tells you that your ways are wrong or right. She only gives you suggestions that may or may not work for your daughter. I will definitely use this book as my daughters grow.

love,love,love it has not helped my understand kids and yound adults but my own life, could not put it down! I now understand why certain things happened in my own life and how I could prevent them in my own kids lives as well as other youth around me whom I want to mentor...highly recommeded.

My husband and I have been in student ministry for almost two decades and I have yet to find a book for parents of girls that is so honest, so straightforwardly truthful and so disturbing (in a good, motivating, don't-you-dare-ignore -this-message kind of way!) We minster to girls from across the spectrum spiritually and socio-economically and this book bears out what we have been witnessing. I cannot wait for the mother daughter book study that is supposed to be coming out in the spring. I'm already putting together a group of moms and daughters to go through it. Thanks Vicki!

I'm so glad I read this book when my daughter is only 8. It was a heads-up on what to expect in the coming years, but also made me aware of subtle messages that I and the culture of the day are already sending to my daughter. It had some great ideas for what to talk about as her sexuality emerges and how to go about it. (For example, never occurred to me until I read this book to brainstorm ways to say no to a guy who is pressuring you to go farther physically. What a common sense idea.) If you're turned off by all things Christian, this aspect of the book will probably distract you, but if you can get past that or if you're already with her on that, there is a LOT of food for thought here. Even if you don't agree with her view of all the issues, it gets you thinking about them.

This book is a great conversation starter and eye opener for me. There are topics that I just don't think about because things have changed so much since I was a teen. It is so helpful in knowing WHAT to talk about and HOW to talk about those subjects.