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The Five Secrets You Must Discover Before You Die [Paperback]

John B. Izzo
4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (54 customer reviews)

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Book Description

January 1, 2008
What are the secrets to finding happiness? Why do some people live well and die happy? John Izzo asked thousands of people to identify the wisest person they knew. "The Five Secrets You Must Discover Before You Die" shares what he learned from over 200 people aged 60-106 whom others said had found the meaning in life. From town barbers to Holocaust survivors, from aboriginal chiefs to CEO's, these people had over 18,000 years of life experience. With warmth and wit, this book shares the "Five Secrets" to a happy and purpose-filled life which Izzo distilled from listening to these stories. Dr. Izzo also shows the reader how to put these secrets into practice in our lives. This book will make you laugh, bring you to tears, and inspire you to discover what matters long before you die. Based on a highly acclaimed TV series appearing on public television, this book takes the reader on a heart-warming and profound journey to find lasting happiness.

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The Five Secrets You Must Discover Before You Die + Life's Greatest Lessons: 20 Things That Matter + The Top Five Regrets of the Dying: A Life Transformed by the Dearly Departing
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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

From the pushy title on down, corporate speaker Izzo (president of The Izzo Group) offers lots of insistent but uninspiring advice for an audience presumably unfamiliar with the real value behind clichés like "be true to your self," "leave no regrets" and "live the moment." Based on interviews with the 235 wisest individuals Izzo could find (culled from some 15,000 nominees), advice boils down to commonsense sayings and platitudes ("every day is a gift"), illustrated by short anecdotes and personal insights. Those new to the self-help genre will find tried and true advice, but little to motivate a real life change.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

Review

"In my experience, the two things humans want most are to find happiness and to find meaning," Izzo writes. In this ready-made spiritual quest, the business consultant and ordained Presbyterian minister interviewed more than 200 people from ages 60 to 106. The answers they received led him and his team to the belief that there are five secrets to happiness. Izzo's interviewees were selected after relatives and friends submitted their names as wise people with something to teach. The list was narrowed from 1,000 names to a diverse group that includes men and women, Muslims and Christians, doctors, barbers, priests, and aboriginal people.

Throughout the book, Izzo presents each lesson with heartfelt responses and anecdotes from these wise elders to illustrate how living each lesson has made them fulfilled and unafraid of death. "Just be yourself" has been the advice of every parent since Polonius. Izzo found that the simple phrase, "be true to yourself," is the first secret. Seventy-two-year-old Elsa told the author, "In order to tell a person the secret to happiness, I would have to sit down with them, look them deeply in the eyes, find out who they are, find out what their dreams are." A college professor discussed with him the difference he sees every day between his students who are following their dreams and those who aren't. Izzo also explains that the word "sin" comes from an ancient Greek word related to archery that literally means "to miss the mark." He believes that to sin, in the original sense of the word, means to "miss the mark of what you intended your life to be." After "leave no regrets," "become love," and "live the moment," the book's final secret is "give more than you take." As George, a seventy-one-year-old physicist, put it, "sooner or later you realize that you are not going to take anything with you but you can leave something behind." Each chapter ends with questions that encourage readers to think about the way they are living their own lives, such as, "Did I make the world a better place this week in some small way?"

In a society where old age is often seen as weakness, The Five Secrets is a refreshing reminder that our elders have much to teach. Izzo writes, "Whenever I am going to take a trip, I choose hotels by using a website that taps into the experiences of hundreds of other travelers ... It occurred to me that one could apply this same method to discovering the secrets to living well and dying happy." How many pitfalls and heartaches could be avoided if we consulted with travelers who have taken the road before?

-- Foreword Magazine, January/February 2008

Verdict: In the burgeoning world of self-help books, Izzo's "five secrets"--"be true to yourself," "leave no regrets," "become love," "live the moment," and "give more than you take"--aren't exactly secrets anymore. But his book takes off on the strength of his methodology of surveying "wide elders." Readers will want to know more about these interviewees and see the accompanying public television series to air widely in the spring of 2008. Highly recommended for all public libraries.


Background: Izzo, CEO of the consulting and training firm that bears his name, and his staff received recommendations from thousands of people regarding who they went to for advice and who they felt had found happiness and purpose in their lives. From the thousands of "wise elders," a diverse group of 235 North American people between the ages of 59 and 105 were selected for in-depth interviews about their lives and feelings. From these stories, Izzo culled the common themes that make up the "secrets" to happiness. In order to incorporate the secrets to happiness, he points out that each of us must discern what really matters to us and incorporate it into our lives; he suggests personal questions to ask ourselves to find our personal path to happiness, as well as weekly and daily reflections.

-- Library Journal, December 4, 2008

Product Details

  • Paperback: 178 pages
  • Publisher: Berrett-Koehler Publishers (January 1, 2008)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1576754758
  • ISBN-13: 978-1576754757
  • Product Dimensions: 5.5 x 0.6 x 8.5 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 9.1 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (54 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #36,739 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

John Izzo is one of North America's most prominent voices on finding more purpose in life and work. His website is http://www.drjohnizzo.com . John is a regular contributor to CSRWire.com .
John has devoted the past 25 years of his life and career to facilitating deeper conversations about values, work, life, leadership and success. He has worked with thousands of leaders, professionals and front-line colleagues to foster workplaces of excellence, purpose, learning and renewal. His clients have ranged from high tech to high touch, hotels to hospitals, and from government agencies to entrepreneurial start-ups. Drawing on his early work in ministry and thousands of programs on creating "Spirited Workplaces," Izzo challenges people to strive to live their values, connect with each other and to humbly balance achievement with fulfillment. Izzo is the author of several books, including the bestselling Awakening Corporate Soul. He has served on the faculties of The University of California -San Diego, and Kent State University.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
32 of 32 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars the purpose is wisdom January 9, 2008
Format:Paperback
Looking to our elders for guidance is a time honored and wise practice that unfortunately is not played out often enough. John Izzo encourages us to go back to that tradition in his book "The Five Secrets You Must Discover Before You Die." Seeking the secrets to happiness, it makes sense to look to those who have lived it.

John interviewed over 200 people, all over the age of 60 and some up into their hundreds, who had been identified by their own friends and family as "the one person they knew who had found happiness and meaning." These people were asked such questions as: "What has brought you the greatest sense of meaning and purpose in life?" and "What is the greatest fear at the end of life?" They were asked to finish the sentence: "I wish I had..." These elders came from all walks of life and acted many roles; some were authors, professors, or business owners, others were a nurse, psychologist, biologist, and a barber. Amazingly, or expectedly, their answers were quite similar. Therein are the five secrets.

The first, and only one I will divulge, is "Be True to Your Self." Of course this can mean different things to each person who reads the words, but author John Izzo guides readers to the purpose behind them. His guidance leads one to ask in this chapter, "Am I following my heart?" "Is my life focused on the things that really matter to me?" and "Am I being the person I want to be in this world?" Answering these questions will lead a person to be true to themselves. Izzo demonstrates the secret by sharing stories from his interviewees. They share by example, much as elders have done since the dawn of humanity. This brings the secret to life for us, and then Izzo gives us homework. He gives us questions to ask ourselves each day or week, that bring the secret home and to the front of the mind. Practice, practice, practice. And so on, with each of the five secrets.

This book is a gem. It is an obvious quest to go to our wise members of society and seek answers to life's questions, but many of us no longer do it. "The Five Secrets You Must Discover Before You Die" does it for us, and hopefully will prompt us to do it ourselves with our own elders. The stories here are all about living wisely, living in the moment; some are funny, while others are poignant. All should be thought-provoking. The consistency of the lessons makes for an easy to understand and digest plan. Taking one secret at a time to work on may be best for some people, pausing in the consumption of the book to work on that particular goal. Other may devour the entire book in one sitting and go back to reflect more carefully as they consider each message. The end result is surely one that will be self fulfilling and inspired. While the title may cause one to stop for a second, for good reason and cause, the content and purpose is wisdom.
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27 of 27 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars "Leave with no regrets..." January 19, 2008
Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase
John Izzo interviewed 200+ people over the age 60 who were described by many others as happy and wise people. Through in-depth interviews, he learns the five secrets of life:

1. Why do some people find meaning & die happy
2. Why I talked to the town barber (and 200 other people over 60) about life
3. The first secret: be true to your self
4. The second secret: leave no regrets
5. The third secret: become love
6. The fourth secret: live the moment
7. The fifth secret: give more than you take
8. When you know you have to go (putting secrets into practice)
9. Preparing to die well: happy people are not afraid to die
10.A final lesson: it's never too late to live the secrets
Epilogue: How this book changed me

The author writes in conversational tone and supported his secrets with colorful anecdotes and personal reflections. For example, in the second secret (leave no regrets) Izzo states that in "his experience from the last 30 years, validated in these interviews, death is not what we fear the most. When we have lived life fully and done what we hoped to do, we can accept death with grace. What we fear most is not having lived to the fullest extent possible, to come to the end of our life with our final words being `I wish I had.'...to leave no regrets we must live with courage, moving toward what we want rather than away from what we fear."

While the 5 secrets aren't a surprise to many, there are many powerful insights in this book that leave you thinking. And while it's one thing to know the secrets, it's an entirely different (and more difficult) matter to put them into action.

If you enjoyed this book, pick up John's Izzo other gem - Second Innocence.
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32 of 34 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars A Good Day to Die April 22, 2008
Format:Paperback
What are the secrets to finding happiness and living wisely? This second line of the first chapter captures the purpose of Dr. John Izzo's new book The Five Serects You Must Discover Before You Die (2008 Berrett-Koehler Publishers, Inc.). The book is an urgent plea to the reader to embrace life--in ever encounter, every experience, every emotion every single day.

Izzo proposes we do that by accepting that life is limited to an unknown amount of time for each of us but that within this limited time we have unlimited opportunities to choose to find meaning by living a purposeful life and thereby find happiness.

He interviewed several hundred older people--"wise elders"--based on the recommendations of persons who recognized them as sources of wisdom. In this way, Izzo turns to ordinary folks who have lived full lives for the wisdom necessary to do the same. If other great teachers of our time and previous times have said it before, so be it. Now we receive the wisdom from the local barber, the Holocaust survivor, the grandma on the porch rocker.....All of Izzo's sources are over 60 because, the author said, this is the age at which most people tend to reflect on life. They're done having and getting; they are looking back on all that they have done.

This diverse group offered insights that came down to these five points:

1. Be true to yourself by living with intention. Know your heart's desire and seek it.

2. Live with no regrets. Regrets, Izzo said, are most persons' biggest fear--not dying itself. So mend fences, make peace, and move your life into a place of peace. The best way to live without regret, Izzo says, is to take chances, pursue those dreams, and accept the failure that might be your way. Rather than be crushed by failure, learn from it.

3. Become love. Love is not an emotion but a choice, a way of being that involves seeing ourselves and others with kindness and compassion. That love creates the opportunities to follow your bliss, heal hurts in yourself and others, and to find peace despite challenges and hardships.

4. Live in the moment. Right here right. That's all.

5. Give more than you take. Izzo explores that wonderful idea of finding yourself and then losing yourself. Once you identify your heart's desire and live your life pursuing it, the chance of accumulating any regrets is reduced. Once you become love, kindness itself becomes part of your purpose, and each moment offers all the joy of a lifetime. This creates an abundance of resources in the forms of love, trust, hope, joy, kindness, compassion. Draw from this deep well and give it away. Leave the campsite better than you found it, as one wise elder put it.

And then, as the saying goes, you will wake each day knowing it is a good day to die.
Posted by SandyCarlson at 6:51 AM 0 comments
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Secrets
I have this book as a hard copy and is a great book to read I was very happy to find it available for my kindle!

Thank you
Published 1 month ago by Angie Ahmed
5.0 out of 5 stars gut geschriebeenes Buch mit realen Handlungsanweisungen un zeitnah...
Ein richtig gut geschriebenes Buch, sehr menschennah und mit realen Handlungsanweisungen, die für jeden sofort umsetzbar sind. Read more
Published 3 months ago by Sauer, Rainer
2.0 out of 5 stars Did not care for this book....
Not at all what I expected. Just do not care for the book at all. Can not recommend it to anyone.
Published 3 months ago by Sherry
3.0 out of 5 stars Reiterate the common sense facts of life
Common sense stuff, this book just makes you think about things, life and have a go at everything, have no regrets
Published 3 months ago by Dawn Crook
5.0 out of 5 stars Dr. Izzo
He is a delight to listen to in person and his book enhances his seminars. Great take home information to use personally and professionally.
Published 3 months ago by Lisa Poggas
5.0 out of 5 stars Beyond excellent! Easy read!! Is what we know but keep forgetting!
Everyone should read this every few or six months... The info is basic... Easy to read... Reminds us how precious life is... Read more
Published 4 months ago by Angel Fumagalli
4.0 out of 5 stars Five Secrets - Well worth reading.
I recommend this book to anyone seeking happiness and focus in their life. Many good ideas and viewpoints to ponder!
Published 5 months ago by Wm. F.
5.0 out of 5 stars A gift
Invest four hours in this gem of a book to learn from the life wisdom of older folks. At times reassuring, at times challenging, and above all times the book is loving and... Read more
Published 6 months ago by Steve Pollock
4.0 out of 5 stars Wonderful information to stop and think about!
The information in this book helps me be more aware of my thoughts and actions in everyday interactions with all people I have contact with. Read more
Published 10 months ago by Lisa
5.0 out of 5 stars Changed how I looked at life
I didn't "read" the book; I listen to the cd and I'm on my second time thru. This book gives you what to think about when you are looking at the way you are living your life. Read more
Published 10 months ago by Chris
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