Customer Reviews

The Flip Side: Break Free of the Behaviors That Hold You Back

5 star:		(17)
4 star:		(2)
3 star:		(0)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

Talking about capitalizing on a name... :) The Flip Side: Break Free of the Behaviors That Hold You Back by Flip Flippen. This was a book I picked up on in one of the personal productivity blogs I follow, and it is one of the most practical, easy-to-understand books on personal change that I've read recently. Even better, he goes into how *you* can react and respond more effectively to each personality type. And trust me, you'll find your problem coworker/friend/acquaintance in here with no problem. :)

Part 1 - Understanding Personal Constraints: Something Is Holding You Back; The Foundations of OPC (Overcoming Personal Constraints); The Five Laws of Personal Constraints; Overview - The Top 10 Killer Constraints
Part 2 - Identifying Personal Constraints: #1 - Bulletproof (Overconfident); #2 - Ostriches (Low Self-Confidence); #3 - Marshmallows (Overly Nurturing); #4 - Critics (Too Demanding, Nitpicky, or Harsh); #5 - Icebergs (Low Nurturing); #6 - Flatliners (Low Passion, Vision, or Drive); #7 - Bulldozers (Overly Dominant); #8 - Turtles (Resistant to Change); #9 - Volcanoes (Aggressive, Angry); #10 - Quick Draw (Low Self-Control, Impulsive)
Part 3 - Overcoming Personal Constraints: Building Your TrAction Plan; Constraints Are Personal - My Story; Personal-Constraint Combinations; OPC Starts at Home; OPC in the Workplace; Personal Constraints and Culture; Listening to What Others Say - The Power of Honest Feedback
Conclusion - Raised in Captivity; Next Steps; Acknowledgments; Index

I'm sure glad I don't have any of these... NOT! :)

Each of the constraint chapters uses a couple of examples (some historical, some personal from the author's work) to show how a particular trait can play out and limit one's effectiveness. This is followed by the "Are You ..." checklist, which has 10 questions you can ask yourself to see where you fall in terms of that constraint. If you're on the high end of the scale, you'll be interested in the "So I'm ... Help Me!" section that follows. That's where Flippen lays out specific actions you can take to change this part of your behavior. Even better, that section is followed by a "How Can I Deal With A ... Person?". That's where you get to find out what types of communication and actions you can take to make your interactions with that personality type go better. The goal isn't to change them (although that would be nice), but it's more like survival skills so you don't get caught in the debris and aftermath of their limitations.

And in case you're wondering, I have marshmellow-y tendencies with a little flatliner and turtle thrown in...

I think that any book that helps you categorize or examine your behaviors can have a positive influence. The Flip Side seems to work better than most in that you don't have to struggle to see yourself or others in the scenarios, and the advice and actions are concrete and do-able. If you're looking to kick things up another level in your life (or avoid kicking someone else in frustration), I'd recommend this book...

From the moment you open this book, you'll know why the flip theme fit its message perfectly. Most self-help books teach us to look to our strengths to achieve success. The Flip Side shows us we need to overcome our personal constraints if we expect to reach our full potential.

Many of us look around and see others living lives we only dream of. According to Flippen, the only thing holding us back is something he calls our personal constraints. Once we understand that, then identify what our constraints are, we can go to work to overcome them.

He offers ten types of personal constraints, ranging from low self-control to overconfidence and variations in between. Each of the ten types has its own chapter to help the reader determine, through stories and examples and checklists, which personal constraint best fits the reader.

Believing we need feedback from others in order to get a clear image of self, Flippen recommends finding a "feedback partner."

According to Flippen, behavior change makes a bigger impact quicker than thinking change does. He devotes a chapter to building a TrAction Plan(tm) for determining personal constraints, then creating steps to overcome those constraints.

The book is a bit heavy on stories, including Flippen's own. His company is the largest educational trainer in North America. With his thirty years' experience and impressive client list that includes Nolan Ryan and the executive director of Joel Osteen Ministries and Lakewood Church, one might expect more how-to, however.

Armchair Interviews says: If you want to flip to the other side and work on your constraints rather than your strengths, this book is a good place to start.

Written by head of The Flippin Group and expert motivational coach Flip Flippen, The Flip Side: Break Free of the Behaviors That Hold You Back is a no-nonsense self-help guide to identifying how personal constraints and often unconscious restrictions can hold one back from one's full potential. Breaking free of those restraints and learning to "flip" negative thoughts and behaviors into positive ones form the core of The Flip Side. Negative personality-driven trait types are listed and range from "bulldozers" (too dominant, ignoring all dissenting options) to "marshmallows" (too nurturing, avoiding conflict at the expense of their happiness) and "quick draws" (too impulsive, with poor self-control). A readily accessible guide to improving one's strengths through recognizing and turning around one's weaknesses.

Over the past 30 years I have read many, many self help books and it appears that within the structure of general self help books most authors tend to stroll down one of two comfort paths: One path tends to be ego laden within the authors own expertise and intentions with little acknowledgment to other possibilities or solutions. If the author did not experience it, then it must not exist and we are pulled down a path of only the author's view or adaption, hence we are held to the author's own growth pattern with little glimpse of anything else. The second and more common path is written in a way as to keep the own author's behavior away from the direction of the book as if their own character could flaw the outcome of the book's message or purpose. An example would be an author who knows how to schedule their time accurately and conveys it eloquently with active experiences and involvement but distances them self from other areas of the book when their own flaws are in conflict with their message. In other words, we like or adapt to the book based on the working principles and descriptions used in the book without much connection to the actual author. I think our parents said it best with: "Do as I say and not as I do."
Here is a book that takes a different path; a book written in authenticity as the author uses his own history and working principles to convey who he is and with total acceptance and intention that we probably are not like him. This book is not hypothetical but instead uses real experiences and examples covering each principle or point completely. This might be the only motivational book I have read in over 5 years that does not use any inspirational quotes and I can understand why because most books need additional validity from a third party to make them influential or believable, whereas this book stands on its own with sound principles and examples. To write in this manner takes a special person who can convey them self soulfully and openly and still stay true to their intended path.
This book is written about constraints that limit our daily lives and how to realistically reduce or eliminate them in a simplified manner. I do not believe someone can appreciate the methods or principles of this book without reading the book completely as each constraint is structured to exemplify the others. Not only are we informed on how to deal with our own constraints but we are also led to understand the limiting constraints in others, making us better leaders, managers, spouses etc. As the author honestly conveys his own constraints, we also gain a better insight of his own style of writing and can utilize these understandings to gain a better knowledge making this book a "Catch 22" with a positive ending. To not grow from this book is to ignore the very principles illustrated and clarified completely to our benefit. I see the possibility of not only improving my own limitations but to be a better communicator and interpreter from each constraint and behavioral example. I must confess that I found the first half of this book average and not until I discovered all of the constraints and their limitations did I come to really appreciate the author and find my own limiting thoughts that withheld valuable information from me. I found that the book was written exactly as it is because this is who the author is and it is up to me to interpret it accordingly. Thank you for this array of valuable insights.

I'll be totally up front. I know Flip Flippen, I've worked with him and benefited from his God-given talents. So maybe it doesn't surprise you that I give The Flip Side a 5-star rating.

Within these pages are the keys to unlocking your full potential and from a different perspective - Flip talks about removing the constraints that limit your upside, unlike many who take the angle of building on your strengths.

The book is easy to read, but difficult to implement. You must be fully committed to being honest with yourself. The more you put into the process, the more benefits you will reap from it - no surprise there. Flip's engaging stories will tug on your heart strings and encourage the brutal honesty that is necessary for growth.

Anyone with an open mind and a desire to be better tommorrow than they are today - at work, at home, in the community - will find this book a winner.

I am in my 51 years old and always searching for ways/methods/techniques that could help us in our daily life, to make it easier or at least, acceptable.
After reading this book, I can say this is an extraordinary book!! Easy and simple to understand and with precious tips that now I know I will be able to handle my own life in a way I do like. I only regreat I did not buy this before!!!

Are you an ostrich or bulldozer? A flat liner or a critic? The Flip Side - Break Free of the Behaviors That Hold You Back helps you to identify the constraints that hold you back and how to work with people that fall into those categories. It then helps you to create a "TrAction Plan" to overcome and deal with these traits.

For example - Chapter 9 deals with icebergs. Icebergs are emotionally tough. They are often seen as emotionally untouchable. The chapter begins by discussing several scenarios encountered by the author. Then it asks a series of questions. Once you total your score, the chapter begins by offering advice on how to "fix" being an iceberg.

After discussing each of the constraints, the authors help the readers to prepare a "TrAction" plan. While you may not need to read the entire book to get "help." There are very interesting suggestions on how to change - if your desire is to have a better life.

Change is hard. It's hard because it's personal and painful. But it's good because it brightens your future. The Flipside, by motivational leadership coach and mentor, Flip Flippen, manages to inspire you to look within without beating you up on the way. The most important lesson - at least, for me - was learning to listen without prejudgment. It helped me open up a new level of understanding; via improved listening skills, with my wife that helped us rekindle our love affair. I'm usually not one for motivational ballyhoo but this book helped me open doors that allowed me to take a more powerful look at the image I presented to the world. If you're ready, willing and able to take an honest look at yourself and improve the image you present to the world and your family, read, The Flipside, by Flip Flippen, you'll see yourself in a new and more positive light.

Expecting to find a couple of constraints I could work on, I discovered within myself a complex mix of strengths and weakness in all areas. Flip does an excellent job of addressing personal needs and suggesting strategies for getting along with the constraints of others in the process. Five stars for sure.

Gave this to a friend of mine that needed this. Amazing book. Great seller too. Thanks so much Vickie