Flirtexting: How to Text Your Way to His Heart [Paperback]

Olivia Baniuszewicz (Author), Debra Goldstein (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: April 2, 2009

Looking for love? Got a cell phone? It's time to flirtext!

Flirtexting—flirting via text (think Blackberry) in search of fun and love—has revolutionized the dating game. And savvy girls can learn how to make the technology work for them in this definitive guide to using flirtexting to find a guy (or two). Here are the rules, spelled out clearly, fearlessly, and with more than a hint of attitude.

You see, rather than feel disappointed that her guy isn't making an effort to talk F2F (face to face), the flirtexting aficionado works it. Debra Goldstein and Olivia Baniuszewicz, graduates of The Rules and He's Just Not That Into You, guide their readers into the next generation of love. Not to give too much away, but the secret is having the advantage of time—and the power to keep the ball in her court until she lets it go. Readers will learn how to create the BPT (best possible text), save themselves from sending the right text to the wrong person, master the steps to manipulate a text, know just when to reply, and much more. This is a book that every bold and modern woman with two opposable thumbs will love.

Product Details

• Paperback: 192 pages
• Publisher: Skyhorse Publishing (April 2, 2009)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1602393672
• ISBN-13: 978-1602393677
• Product Dimensions: 7.7 x 5.1 x 0.7 inches
• Shipping Weight: 15.2 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 4.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (23 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #575,121 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Arguing that "boys text; therefore girls need to know how to flirtext," first-time authors (and, presumably, BFFAEs) Goldstein and Baniuszewicz show the next generation of single women how to entertain suitors with the art of text message flirtation. Taking a healthy cut from The Rules ("playing a little hard to get, to get what you want"), the duo schools readers on timing replies, canceling dates and, perhaps most importantly, how to avoid "mis-texting." Dissecting every possible text-based interaction (often with multiple examples), Goldstein and Baniuszewicz's overwrought guidebook will be received, depending on one's perspective, as either indispensable or hopelessly immature. Walking readers through all facets of text message craft (including enlisting the aid of friends), the exuberant authors also supply plenty of sample responses and conversations, a litany of guy-centric movie quotes (because "guys love to quote movies") and a guide to common abbreviations (including BFFAE: "best friends forever and ever"). With this guide at hand, young singles won't be at a loss for words-at least until the next F2F (face to face) encounter. 20 color illus.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

About the Author

Olivia Baniuszewicz is an authority on digital dating and the co-creator of Flirtexting.com. She has appeared as a textpert on NBC Today, CNN, and MTV and is a frequent contributor to the Huffington Post.

Debra Goldstein is a leading expert on digital dating and the co-creator of Flirtexting.com. Her work has appeared in Cosmopolitan, Glamour, Seventeen, and InStyle. Debra appears frequently on national television and radio.

Product Details

• Paperback: 192 pages
• Publisher: Skyhorse Publishing (April 2, 2009)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1602393672
• ISBN-13: 978-1602393677
• Product Dimensions: 7.7 x 5.1 x 0.7 inches
• Shipping Weight: 15.2 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 4.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (23 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #575,121 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

25 of 28 people found the following review helpful

1.0 out of 5 stars Biggest Waste Of Time February 23, 2011

By Just Stopping By

Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase

This book was horrible and I only gave it one star because when I left the stars blank, Amazon would not let me post my review. The pages are cut thick to take up space and the few pages in the book have empty content. If you want to take time reading a book about how texting became popular, why it's all the rage and how okay it is to text when trying to get with a dude, this is the book for you. I was under the impression this was a guide to help you shoot back savvy replies when you are so lost on what to say to a guy you really like over the phone. We have all had those moments. Do we text? Is it too soon? How do I reply to what he said and how long do I wait? What does he mean by that text? Sure, we would love to hear the answers but this book isnt the place to find it. Save your money!

9 of 9 people found the following review helpful

1.0 out of 5 stars Not Impressed, not worth the money! September 10, 2010

By nyc gal

Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase

Wasn't impressed with this book, they just shared common knowledge and common sense...really learned nothing new.

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful

1.0 out of 5 stars Text and the City: Dating Advice for Generation Me. June 7, 2012

By dotsetloops

Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase

Here's this book in a nutshell: two twentysomething Valley Girls read He's Just Not That Into You (Other than a paragraph-long "Ode" early on, there's really not that much of The Rules here), and decided to write a book of texting advice as an adjoinder. After illustrations and photos of the two authors, there's about 80 pages of advice on how to write Diablo Cody-esque texts and time them so that you don't look desperate.

Authors Olivia Baniuszewicz and Debra Goldstein appear to miss what made their precursors big sellers. I would argue that the real triumph of The Rules and He's Just Not That Into You lied not in the ideas, but in the rhetoric. It wasn't just that they were advocating that women merely play coy, but that their advice was delivered in a black and white, yes-or-no fashion. Flirtexting lays out different scenarios and what you might your message might suggest to a potential suitor based on the time you send it, but ultimately leave the final call up to you. It comes off as more of a showcase for the authors to show off their superior texting skills, rather than a real roadmap for snagging the man of your dreams. One might come away more confused (as I did) rather than informed by the advice. Books like The Rules and He's Just Not That Into You are read by insecure women of all kinds looking for straightforward answers, not by alpha females looking to be wittier.

Baniuszewicz and Goldstein may be living the life they dreamed about watching "Sex and the City" in high school and college (and thus, envied by many young women), but that's hardly a gauge as to whether or not you can give good dating advice. I'm no fan of The Rules, but anyone who's read that book can tell you that it's written from the perspective of reformed doormats.... The Rules and its sequels utilize social proof and cautionary tales to drive their point home. These girls have no life experience, or at least not the kind that can offer enlightened dating advice. Early on, they advise readers against coming across as "Fast-Track Jane", the woman desperate to find Mr. Right, but they don't explain what the consequences might be if they do. They don't give any indication that they've experienced real heartbreak, and it ends up coming off as less tough love, more mean girl. On the other hand, the authors appear to take The Rules at face value (i.e. a game), as they define The Rules as "playing hard to get...to get what you want", and that might even be because of a lack of life experience.

Again, I'm not a fan of the "hard-to-get", tough love approach to dating advice. However, if you're looking for a book of texting advice along those lines, Vanessa Taylor's Kindle-only Text. Love. Power. is a more worthwhile read. It's straightforward, no filler, and it offers clear-cut guidelines of when it is and isn't appropriate to text. Not recommended to anyone who is old enough to legally buy a drink. Read more ›

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful

2.0 out of 5 stars Light on content June 7, 2009

By CarolG

Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase

Prucahsed for a single friend, I found this book had only a few good tips but had more fluff than real advice or helpful content.
I returned it and bought her something else.

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Tips were Fantastic! September 17, 2010

By Lizzie

Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase

Land-line telephones were around for decades and that gave generations of women advice to pass down or to share with their friends on how to handle guys on the phone. But this is really the first generation that must deal with flirting without tone of voice as a guide. That's where this book is the bible of texting with a flirtatious slant. I read this in an afternoon and it opened my eyes to all the mistakes girls make and how to fix those mistakes. Will be recommending this book to every girl who wonders "why doesn't he text me"" or "why did he stop texting me?" Great Advice!

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Keeping it real August 10, 2010

By Hotchick

Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase

I love the quick wit of the authors. I think it's a must have for any girl entering the new age in dating. LUV IT!!!! I take it on the go with me...fits well in my purse.

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Totally relevant! May 26, 2009

By D.P.

Format:Paperback

This book is awesome! It is totally relevant to dating these days, and it's a quick read with a ton of helpful advice. I highly recommend it to anyone in a relationship... even one that's past the initial dating stage. Buy it for yourself or for a friend... you won't regret it!

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars My Favorite Book May 21, 2009

By Karen

Format:Paperback

This book is fantastic. It's honest, helpful and gave me the tough love I needed to hear! It had SUCH good advice that my sister went to go buy it the next day. We are so glad to know that someone has finally written a MUST HAVE guide to lay down the rules and offer awesome examples on the art of flirting over text.