Following Foo: (the electronic adventures of The Chestnut Man) [Hardcover]

B.D. Wong (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: May 13, 2003

Every now and then there comes along a literary voice so strong, so originally sincere, and so uniquely distinct that the words on the page seem to sing and to scream and to dance -- all at once and all on their own. Such is the wonderful writing debut of acclaimed actor B.D. Wong.

With a remarkable mixture of upbeat optimism, unexpected hilarity, and heart-wrenching sadness, Wong takes the reader deep inside both his psyche and the neonatal intensive care unit where he spent the better part of three months following the harrowing medical twists and turns that took place after the premature birth of his twins."Once upon a time," as Wong explains in his true story, Following Foo: (the electronic adventures of the Chestnut Man), "my partner and I found ourselves expecting, with the help of a surrogate mother, modern medical science, and lots of good luck and prayers. To add to our blessing, she was carrying twins! Things were pretty swell ... until the twins arrived almost three months early. For those of you who don't know, babies that come almost three months early are pretty little, and boy are they scary-looking. Especially when you're their dad ... "

Originally based on a series of real-time E-mails sent to keep his friends and family abreast of the daily madness and miracles of "early" parenthood, this book is a gem, a joy, and an inspiration to anyone who has ever taken a ride on the roller coaster of life and tried to keep both sense of humor and sanity intact.

Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

High tech meets high touch in actor B.D. Wong’s remarkable electronic parenting memoir, Following Foo The story begins when the surrogate mother, carrying twins for Wong and longtime partner Richie, gives birth 11 weeks early. The loss of the first twin and the anguished nurturing of the tiny Foo are described in a series of e-mails for friends, family and theatrical colleagues, whose responses are also reprinted. Readers ride the roller coaster of Foo’s surgeries, eye exams, pneumonia scares, dropping heart rate, and brochospasms. Although Wong is writing about a unique situation, he manages to capture the fear and awe that every parent will recognize.

Wong’s wiry alertness, sly show-business humor, and aching vulnerability are a potent mix. In one e-mail, he captures the terror and tenderness of the intensive-care nursery. In another, he celebrates Foo’s first, long- awaited "poop." He overeats, describes his parents in loving detail, and leaves the door of a hospital refrigerator (packed with frozen breast milk) wide open. The author’s voice crackles with love, energy and astute observation. Occasionally his essays--for example, one written from baby Foo’s perspective--seem forced. Also, the decision to include the name-dropping "credits" of the friends who responded to his e-mails mar this otherwise exceptional tale. Still, these don't obscure the book's charms. Early in the book, Wong compares his newborn son to "a little chestnut man—a wise old man selling chestnuts on a snowy night." By the book’s end, it is Wong’s hard-won wisdom that will warm readers. --Barbara Mackoff

From Publishers Weekly

In this charismatic parenting memoir, Tony Award-winning actor Wong details the days following the premature birth of his biological twin boys via surrogate mother. Based on e-mail messages Wong sent to family and friends, the book recounts Wong's and his partner's remarkable highs and lows on the road to parenthood. When surrogate mother Shauna goes into labor two months early in California, Wong, on location on the West Coast, rushes with her to the hospital. In the following hours, Wong becomes a father, but loses one son, a victim of "twin to twin transfusion syndrome," a serious condition not uncommon in identical twin pregnancies. Facing the death of Boaz and the delicate survival of Jackson Foo is not easy. Dealing with bereavement and jubilation at once, Wong says farewell to Boaz and devotes the next three months to Foo's survival in the ICU, where he encounters a challenging roller-coaster ride of experiences and emotions. Foo (born at two pounds, 14 ounces) is a fighter, and with the love of his dads and a strong supporting cast, readers follow his progress to eventual triumph. Written with humor and wit, Wong's memoir often compares his real-life experiences to TV or movies; he writes of medical personnel with compassion and includes e-mail from friends and family in the narration of his tiny hero's journey. Wong's is a story of fatherhood, struggle and the rejuvenating power of love that will undoubtedly garner a standing ovation from parents, particularly those who have met with close calls of their own.
Copyright 2003 Reed Business Information, Inc.

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Product Details

• Hardcover: 400 pages
• Publisher: HarperEntertainment; 1 edition (May 13, 2003)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0060529539
• ISBN-13: 978-0060529536
• Product Dimensions: 8.3 x 5.6 x 1.5 inches
• Shipping Weight: 1.4 pounds
• Average Customer Review: 4.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (21 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #933,693 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

12 of 12 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars From the Point of View of a Preemie Mom, May 19, 2004

By 

"mom2julia" (Framingham, MA USA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Following Foo: (the electronic adventures of The Chestnut Man) (Hardcover)

When I saw this book, I just had to read it. Not because of who the author was or that he was gay, but because he LIVED what I was LIVING. Mr. Wong's book is the ONLY book about NICU babies that I would suggest as a MUST READ for critically premature parents! It doesn't help you understand the medical terms, it helps you understand YOU, as a parent of a tiny ray of life in a plastic box.
I lost a premature daughter (Mary) at 23 weeks, eleven months after that my second premature baby (Julia)was born at a whopping 28 weeks. I still was grieving Mary's death while trying to stay "upbeat" and "positive" about my Julia in the NICU. I joked, I laughed, but I hid A LOT of emotions. Everybody tells you how strong you are, what a brave person you are, while inside you are screaming "WHY MY CHILDREN!?!". You feel like you are the ONLY person in the world who feels that way.
Well, Mr. Wong's book is the ONLY book I have read that made me feel like I wasn't going crazy. He not only addressed the issues of being a parent of a NICU baby, but losing a child, and the realities of coping with that loss while being exatically happy your child has made a huge accomplishment (She either pooped, or ate half a teaspoon of breastmilk... major things in a NICU).
His humor at the most critical of times is very similar to how I dealt with things when the dr.s would say... "Well, Julia had a good day today, she only stopped breathing twice, and oh, by the way, her blood levels show she may need a transfustion, etc."
Life in the NICU is like constantly waiting for the shoe to drop! And when it does, it is usually a size 15 triple E!

I would love for Mr. Wong to do a follow up to his book, maybe "Following Foo, The Early Years". Julia is now 18 months old, and we are dealing with Early Intervention, Boston Children's Hospital, Weight issues, and Mom (or Dad) going nuts trying to keep it all in check. I would dearly love to hear some advice. Plus, I fell in love with his adorable son in this book and would love to know how he is doing!

15 of 17 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars I don't like roller coasters, but i sure do like this book, May 26, 2003

By 

Larry Mark "editor of MyJewishBooks.com" (nyc) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Following Foo: (the electronic adventures of The Chestnut Man) (Hardcover)

...It was on this evening that the actor/singer B.D. Wong and his talent agent partner, Richard Jackson, became fathers in Modesto, CA. Their twin sons were born woefully, dangerously, nearly 3 months premature. Over the next several months, Wong kept his ever increasing list of friends informed of the roller coaster progress, the ups and downs, through a series of emailed updates. These introspective, mesmerizing, hopeful, honest emails got passed around, and have been compiled to create this book. At times it elicits chuckles, sometimes you will thank god for unsung heroic healthcare workers, and at other times your eyes will well up with tears. The book is an adventurous journey into fatherhood, Jewish and Chinese American families, medical miracles, social work, gynecology, as well as sprinkling asides into life in television and film acting, food, and parenting.

The words are presented in a variety of fonts and styles to add drama to the reading. Graphics from the Milton Bradley games of Operation and Ka-boom also drive home some messages. Wong also includes some of the songs he wrote, such as his ode to Poop.

The book is impossible to put down, as you hunger to learn whether first-born Boaz Dov Wong (Boaz: the swift, strong, hospitable, giving biblical character who rescues Ruth and fathers the line of King David; Dov: the quiet strength of a peaceful bear) and younger Jackson Foo Wong (Jackson/Yohanan: for his father's surname, graciousness of god; Foo: wealth, for his grandfather) will survive and thrive. At the end of each update, Wong includes snippets of the emails responses he received from friends, family, nurses, and doctors, including other famous celebrity/parents, such as Joel Gray, Jane Kazmarek, Barbara Barry, Margaret Cho, Michelle Kwan, and John Lithgow. David Hirson, a playwright, wrote it best when he repsonded in an email to Wong, that each bulletin [was] "...melancholy, funny, spirited, rallying, sometimes buoyant, sometimes exhausting..." For readers who need linear stories, start with Update 8; all other can begin with the Preface.

10 of 11 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars B.D. Wong touches the heart and soul, September 19, 2003

By 

"tranquil03" - See all my reviews

This review is from: Following Foo: (the electronic adventures of The Chestnut Man) (Hardcover)

Following Foo is actor and writer B.D. Wong's account of the saga of his and his partner Richie's decision to have a child through surrogacy, and how that choice came to beautiful and heart wrenching fruition through the premature birth of twin boys Jackson (Foo) and Boaz. Oh, but it is so much more than a chronological recap of events in the process of pregnancy, birth and nurturing. It is a window into the daily and hourly emotional upheavals that attend the impending birth of a child (in this case, children)as well as the joys and sorrows experienced by loving parents and dedicated medical professionals as they join in the struggle to nurture new life. Moreover, this exceptional work is a moving tribute to the human spirit exemplified in the courage of two beautiful souls, Jackson and Boaz. Mr. Wong captures the very essence of the human capacity and need for love in this warm, often times humorous, always compelling work. A significant portion of the book is composed of supportive e-mails from friends and family. While at first glance, this might seem a distraction, it is actually an integral and enjoyable part of the journey, which serves not only to lighten the tension that is so ever present in the struggle for survival that all premature infants undergo and so effectively communicated to the reader by Mr. Wong, but it also serves to show a beautiful community of love and concern that was empowering and life-affirming. This superbly paced narrative is intelligent , whimsical and keenly observant of the human condition. It is highly recommended.