Enter your mobile number or email address below and we'll send you a link to download the free Kindle App. Then you can start reading Kindle books on your smartphone, tablet, or computer - no Kindle device required.
To get the free app, enter your email address or mobile phone number.
Fondling Your Muse: Infallible Advice From a Published Author to the Writerly Aspirant Hardcover – September 15, 2005
Top 20 lists in Books
View the top 20 best sellers of all time, the most reviewed books of all time and some of our editors' favorite picks. Learn more
Customers Who Viewed This Item Also Viewed
More About the Author
Top Customer Reviews
(Caution: if you're a fan of Ann Coulter or certain tax cuts, this book may not be for you.)
The book often made me laugh out loud. Its tone, to over-generalize, is basically an ironic smarty-pants meets silly grade schooler (which, as can be expected, quite similar to that of McSweeney's Internet Tendency). What I liked best about the book is that, while taking numerous jabs at anyone from Oprah, to Stephen King, to John Updike, to Gee Dubya, to Hillary Clinton, Warner never seems snarky or mean. The tone remains playful as Warner's tongue is held firmly in cheek, and the result in a book that is pretty much delightful in its entirety. As one who Warner would deem "writerly aspirant", I found the book to be dead-on when it comes to characterizing the various writer stereotypes, conversations, and mindsets. This is the perfect gift for your friend who dreams of writing, yet is able to take her/himself not-so seriously. Even those who aren't planning on writing the Great American Novel or publishing volumes of their nature poetry can, I think, appreciate this book.
It was oddly helpful in a way not unlike when you're reading a gut-bustingly funny book while at the same time eating a bowl of Friendly's "Forbidden Chocolate Explosion" ice cream, and suddenly all of the ice cream comes spurting out of your nose because you just came upon the most hilarious passage you've ever read, and then you realize how "a propos" the name of the ice cream is, and you clean yourself up and go to the store because that was the last of the ice cream, and you're searching the frozen food section while trying to ignore the awkward-yet-gawking looks you've been receiving from the other shoppers, and an acquaintance comes up to you and you say hi, and he asks how it's going and what that crusty brown spot is on your left cheek, and you're like "Crusty brown spot? What crusty brown spot?", and he shuffles his feet on the linoleum and coughs in an unconvincing manner and makes a hasty exit, and you start getting an uncomfortable feeling and rush to the bathroom, but you don't know where it is so you ask the stock guy in aisle 3, and he refuses to make eye contact while pointing you in the approximate direction, and you finally get in there and see your flourescently-lit reflection in the mirror and you're all "Oh my god! I've got Friendly's 'Forbidden Chocolate Explosion' on my face! Thank goodness somebody told me! That could have been really embarrassing!"
This book was a must-buy because a few weeks ago (I think it was a Tuesday), two thugs (who later confessed to having been hired by the author) accosted me in an alleyway and shoved a copy of "Fondling Your Muse" at me while grunting, "Must buy. Must buy." They were wearing trenchcoats, so...Read more ›
What a way to turn the writing advice genre on its head. While there IS real advice to be found in John Warner's "Fondling Your Muse," it's just buried in the folds of all that humor. I had to keep reminding myself to pay attention between the lines to information I was reading for. This is witty as hell, tongue-in-cheek, hilarious (as the title would suggest, of course). And I hope no one takes all of Warner's suggestions seriously--I can see the lawsuits now!
Read Warner for his humor, for his in-sight into how the book world "really" works, for his dripping wit and sarcasm--it's worth the chuckles and outright laughter. "Fondling Your Muse" is the ideal antidote I needed to counteract the sturm-und-drang self-imposed reading list I've been working through lately. Awesome stuff!
Most Recent Customer Reviews
Although this is nowhere near as side-splittingly wonderful (or as useful) as How Not to Write a Novel, it's still an amusing, chuckle-worthy parody of the genre of "writing... Read morePublished on August 21, 2012 by Meaghan
A force to be reckon with, the Catholic Church contributes many good things to society. Besides feeding, teaching, and pasturing millions around the globe, the Church is the... Read morePublished on August 11, 2011 by Dr. Wilson Trivino
Dazzling, devious, delicious. Like a twelve layer devil's food cake that gives you the pure unadulterated joy of fulfillment and then turns your intestines to goop. Read morePublished on June 17, 2009 by Beth Poppet
John Warner, Fondling Your Muse (Writer's Digest, 2005)
I was unaware, until faced with the cover of this book, that Warner was the editor of McSweeney's, and as soon as... Read more
People must have thought I was losing my mind, as they passed while I was reading this book to pass some time before work. Read morePublished on December 27, 2006 by Robin L. Cole
I gave this book one star because you can't give no stars. Like other reviewers, I am taking this book back to the store. Read morePublished on December 8, 2006 by Margaret DeAngelis
I saw the title and thought, "I am not so sure about
this one...." and found myself angry at first for
the author's insatiable ability to be so... Read more
I have not read this book, but based on what a friend's nephew told me about it, I may enjoy it. I look forward to possibly getting this book for my birthday. Read morePublished on January 4, 2006 by Beerzie Boy