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Fondling Your Muse: Infallible Advice From a Published Author to the Writerly Aspirant [Hardcover]

John Warner (Author)
3.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (18 customer reviews)

Price: $19.99 & eligible for FREE Super Saver Shipping on orders over $25. Details
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Book Description

September 15, 2005
"Desperation is the mother of invention, and if you think you have a future as a writer, you're nothing if not desperate." Such is the advice of John Warner in this innovative and slightly insane book. Equal parts humour and strange instruction, Fondling Your Muse is:; Packed with quirky tips from the editor of McSweeney's Internet Tendency; Clearly one-of-a-kind in its earnest advice to helpless, lazy, and untalented writers; A new spin on timeless writing problems exploiting writers' most vicious insecurities with flair, this guide will make writers worse at the craft and, as a result, eminently more publishable.

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Editorial Reviews

About the Author

John Warner is a successful editor of many books and has published many popular novels with his unique writing ability.

Product Details

  • Hardcover: 224 pages
  • Publisher: Writers Digest Books (September 15, 2005)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1582973482
  • ISBN-13: 978-1582973487
  • Product Dimensions: 7.4 x 5.3 x 0.9 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 13.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 3.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (18 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,174,061 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

John Warner is an author of humor, fiction, and non-fiction, a longtime editor of McSweeney's Internet Tendency and a teacher, currently at College of Charleston. His writing advice parody, Fondling Your Muse: Infallible Advice from a Published Author to the Writerly Aspirant was a BookSense pick and My First Presidentiary: A Scrapbook of George W. Bush (co-authored with Kevin Guilfoile) was a number one Washington Post bestseller. He is a co-color commentator for the Tournament of Books and an occasional one man book recommending service known as The Biblioracle.

 

Customer Reviews

18 Reviews
5 star:
 (11)
4 star:
 (2)
3 star:
 (1)
2 star:
 (1)
1 star:
 (3)
 
 
 
 
 
Average Customer Review
3.9 out of 5 stars (18 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

26 of 30 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars A very good read, October 5, 2005
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This review is from: Fondling Your Muse: Infallible Advice From a Published Author to the Writerly Aspirant (Hardcover)
This book dishes up the same writing old writing advice in a fresh, funny, and original way. For example, instead of saying the familiar "Turn off the TV," he enthusiastically suggests TiVo as a time management tool. He also responds to Stephen King's writing suggestions such as "Remove every extraneous word." His response: "Idea. Good. This one." Even if you already know all this, "Fondling Your Muse" is still insightful, ironic, and highly entertaining. You won't find any writing exercises or basic, dry definitions of omniscient point of view, or recommendations to keep a journal, but at the very least, it's inspiring stuff.

(Caution: if you're a fan of Ann Coulter or certain tax cuts, this book may not be for you.)
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10 of 11 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Matchless! (in the realm of humorous books on writing-advice), February 13, 2006
By 
James Yeh (Brooklyn, NY, USA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
This review is from: Fondling Your Muse: Infallible Advice From a Published Author to the Writerly Aspirant (Hardcover)
John Warner's Fondling Your Muse is an uncommonly funny and clever book. Written by the editor of McSweeney's Internet Tendency, this book is not a straight-ahead 12-step program on how to become a writer. If you couldn't tell that from the tone of the title, you probably aren't going to enjoy the book. That said, if you did "get" it, this book will hit the funny bone often and directly, leaving your elbow feeling numb and tingly (in a good way).

The book often made me laugh out loud. Its tone, to over-generalize, is basically an ironic smarty-pants meets silly grade schooler (which, as can be expected, quite similar to that of McSweeney's Internet Tendency). What I liked best about the book is that, while taking numerous jabs at anyone from Oprah, to Stephen King, to John Updike, to Gee Dubya, to Hillary Clinton, Warner never seems snarky or mean. The tone remains playful as Warner's tongue is held firmly in cheek, and the result in a book that is pretty much delightful in its entirety. As one who Warner would deem "writerly aspirant", I found the book to be dead-on when it comes to characterizing the various writer stereotypes, conversations, and mindsets. This is the perfect gift for your friend who dreams of writing, yet is able to take her/himself not-so seriously. Even those who aren't planning on writing the Great American Novel or publishing volumes of their nature poetry can, I think, appreciate this book.
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7 of 7 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Wear Depends when reading this book, December 30, 2005
This review is from: Fondling Your Muse: Infallible Advice From a Published Author to the Writerly Aspirant (Hardcover)
Being a writer,I bought this book thinking it would give me pointers and help with the epiphanies that writers sometimes get if they're lucky. It DOES give pointers (some of them a poke in the eye)and is a real good book to sit down and enjoy. It is so funny that I recommend wearing Depends and bracing your ribs with a pillow before you start reading. Yes, it's that good. THis is the funniest book on writing I've found yet (and I am a biblophile). I recommend this book even if you are not a writer or never have given it any thought. You'll enjoy it anyway.
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