Foreskin's Lament: A Memoir (Hardcover)

~ (Author) "When I was a child, my parents and teachers told me about a man who was very strong..." (more)
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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Auslander, a magazine writer, describes his Orthodox Jewish upbringing as theological abuse in this sardonic, twitchy memoir that waits for the other shoe to drop from on high. The title refers to his agitation over whether to circumcise his soon to be born son, yet another Jewish ritual stirring confusion and fear in his soul. Flitting haphazardly between expectant-father neuroses in Woodstock, N.Y., and childhood neuroses in Monsey, N.Y., Auslander labors mightily to channel Philip Roth with cutting, comically anxious spiels lamenting his claustrophobic house, off-kilter family and the temptations of all things nonkosher, from shiksas to Slim Jims. The irony of his name, Shalom (Hebrew for peace), isn't lost on him, a tormented soul gripped with dread, fending off an alcoholic, abusive father while imagining his heavenly one as a menacing, mocking, inescapable presence. Fond of tormenting himself with worst-case scenarios, he concludes, That would be so God. Like Roth's Portnoy, he commits minor acts of rebellion and awaits his punishment with youthful literal-mindedness. But this memoir is too wonky to engage the reader's sympathy or cut free Auslander's persona from the swath of stereotype—and he can't sublimate his rage into the cultural mischief that brightens Roth's oeuvre. That said, a surprisingly poignant ending awaits readers. (Oct.)
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From Bookmarks Magazine

Shalom Auslander, author of Beware of God: Stories (2005) and a contributor to This American Life, reveals his ambivalence about God through fear, black humor, and undirected anger. If Foreskin’s Lament sounds like a terrible rage against God, it is, in parts, but it coalesces into a fascinating reflection on the role of faith and ritual in modern life. Most reviewers found Auslander’s stories about his tormented life refreshing, moving, and humorousâ€"for example, the story of his father building an ark for the synagogue, only to be ostracized, struck a high note. However, a few criticized Auslander’s tendency to mask real anger and deep questions with comedy. Beneath the humor, however, lies a reflective memoir on religion’s powerful holdâ€"and why, sometimes, it’s so hard to shake it off.

Copyright © 2004 Phillips & Nelson Media, Inc.

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Product Details

• Hardcover: 320 pages
• Publisher: Riverhead Hardcover; First Edition. 1 in number line edition (October 4, 2007)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1594489556
• ISBN-13: 978-1594489556
• Product Dimensions: 8.1 x 5.4 x 1.2 inches
• Shipping Weight: 12 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 3.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (60 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #260,508 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

50 of 66 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Funny, poignant, and very readable, October 7, 2007

By	Debra Hamel (TwitterLit.com) - See all my reviews (TOP 500 REVIEWER)    (REAL NAME)

Shalom Auslander grew up in the 1970s and 80s in Monsey, New York, in an Orthodox Jewish family, with all that entailed: the arcana of kosher dietary restrictions; the uniform of the Orthodox Jew--tzitzis and peyis and yarmulke; the mind-numbing bordeom of Sabbath, when most worthwhile human activitiy is forbidden by Jewish law.

"It was forbidden to watch TV, it was forbidden to write, it was forbidden to draw, it was forbidden to color. It was forbidden to play with trains because they used electricity. It was forbidden to play with Legos because it was considered building. It was forbidden to play with Silly Putty because if you pressed it against a newspaper it would transfer some of the ink to itself, and so it was considered printing."

More specifically, Auslander grew up in an unhappy Orthodox Jewish family. His father was belligerent and volatile and given to threats involving amputation. His mother wallowed in misery and home decorating. It's hardly surprising that in adulthood Auslander has complicated relationships with both his family and God, the latter an angry entity who, much like Auslander's father, specializes in inconsistent and disproportionate punishments. But Auslander still believes. He believes, for example, that God keeps a particularly careful eye on his misdemeanors, and he is always expecting God to screw him over.

Auslander writes about his fallings-out with both family and God in his very readable memoir Foreskin's Lament. (The reason for the title is made clear about halfway through the book.) He describes the various ways he acted out against both as a teenager; his back-and-forthing on the question of keeping kosher; his self-imposed, frankly shocking acts of penance. The book is a fast read and fascinating for the light it sheds on the lifestyle of the ultra-Orthodox and on Auslander in particular. It is both funny (with one of the most original acknowledgment pages you'll ever read) and poignant, especially when the author is describing his conflicted relationship with his father, whom he manages to portray as both unlikeable and tragic.

Auslander's book serves as a healthy reminder of the perverse influence of religion:

"Thousands of years ago, a terrified, half-made old man genitally mutilated his son, hoping it would buy him some points with the Being he hoped was running the show. Over the years, equally terrified men wrote blessings and composed prayers and devised rituals and ordained that an empty seat be left for Elijah. Six thousand years later, a father will not look his grandson in the face, and a mother and sister will defend such behavior, because the child wasn't mutilitated in precisely the right fashion.

"Come see what your sons are doing in the world."

The author is still not fully recovered from the effects of his religious instruction, but he's happier. It's just a shame that he had to waste so much energy and so much time undergoing that indoctrination and, in turn, in attempting to slough it off.

-- Debra Hamel

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars A darkly humorous memoir. Did I mention dark?, March 9, 2008

By	Steven Saus (Dayton, OH) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

"Wow - they really did a number on you."

It's a line Auslander's wife and mine both say with a frightening regularity. Perhaps that's why I immediately resonated with this book, despite my lack of Orthodox Jew-ness, growing up in a completely different environment (West Virginia instead of New York) and other massive differences.

Then again, I was raised Catholic and have worn a Flying Spaghetti Monster T-shirt to Mass. Under a sweater, just in case someone (human or divine) noticed and decided to strike me down.

The humor I found was not the humor of slapstick or manners. It is the humor of deep, dark irony. It's the wry smile as the last thing that could go wrong *does* go wrong.

This is a darkly humorous book, and painfully honest. The zingers are real - but they apply to you more than you think.

You can either laugh or cry.

One thing is for sure.

God is laughing. Even if He doesn't exist.

10 of 13 people found the following review helpful:

2.0 out of 5 stars As his wife says, they really did a number on him., August 9, 2008

By	Sunny @ the Library "sunnyatthelibrary.com" (USA) - See all my reviews

I wanted to like this book. I heard an interview in which Auslander read the first page or so, and thought it sounded really funny. As someone that grew up in what was, at times, an overbearing religious environment and a semi-dysfunctional home, I was sure I could understand, and laugh along with him.

But my, oh my, Auslander is angry. Very, very angry. And more so than the humor, this is what permeated this book for me. In many places, it completely washed out the humor.

Don't get me wrong, he's a funny man and knows how to turn a phrase for comic effect. There were moments I really, really enjoyed, and even one or two that made me laugh out loud. (Who names their kid peace?)

But I guess I was expecting something more like David Sedaris -- a man who really knows how to make the most of a screwed up and depressing situation.

Foreskin's Lament just left me uncomfortable, and possibly worried about Shalom's blood pressure. You just can't hang on to anger like that, can you?