Forever Today: A True Story of Lost Memory and Never-Ending Love [Import] [Paperback]

Deborah Wearing (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: March 3, 2006

The man who lost his memory: the story of an English musician crippled by total amnesia, and the wife who tried to find a cure, then ran away to start her life over, and finally came back to him.

Clive Wearing is one of the most famous, extreme cases of amnesia ever known. In 1985, while at the height of his success as a conductor and BBC music producer, a virus completely destroyed the memory part of his brain, leaving him trapped in a limbo of the constant present where every conscious moment was as if he had just woken from a ten-year coma. For seven years he was kept in the general ward of a London hospital while his wife Deborah campaigned for better conditions and searched hopelessly for a cure. As damaged as Clive was, the musical part of his brain was unaffected, as was his passionate love for Deborah.

Finding there was no way to bring Clive back, Deborah eventually fled to America to start her life again. Then, miraculously, in their transatlantic phone calls she noticed Clive starting to recover some of his memory, and she was pulled back to England. Today, although he still lives in care, they are closer than ever.

This is the story of an extreme condition that is a reminder of what it means to be human. It is also a woman’s quest to understand, control, and escape from a nightmare. Finally, it is insight into a bond that runs deeper than conscious thought, a love overcoming the most tragic handicap.

Editorial Reviews

Review

This is a harrowing, haunting and heartening book - a loss-story which is also a love story. It takes us deep inside the question of what it means to be human' - Andrew Motion; 'Sometimes terrifying, sometimes very funny, and always deeply moving, Deborah Wearing's beautifully written testament to a love that survives all the ravages of her husband's amnesia is a book to seize the heart' - Lindsay Clarke, author of the Whitbread winning The Chymical Wedding; 'A remarkable book: absorbing, moving and humbling' - Fay Weldon

About the Author

Deborah Wearing campaigned for ten years for special medical services for the brain-damaged, and founded The Amnesia Association. She now combines writing with her work as an administrator for Britain’s National Health Service.

Product Details

• Paperback: 400 pages
• Publisher: Corgi (March 3, 2006)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0552771694
• ISBN-13: 978-0552771696
• Product Dimensions: 7.8 x 4.8 x 1.1 inches
• Shipping Weight: 12 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (7 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #608,570 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

16 of 16 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Love and Courage, February 13, 2008

By 

Wordlover "Expat'nNYC" (NYC) - See all my reviews
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This review is from: Forever Today (Hardcover)

This is the most awe-inspiring book I have ever read. The story of an unbelievable tragedy which struck down the career of a brilliant man, musician/conductor, husband (Clive Wearing) into a life of the severest amnesia ever known. Through this book, written by his wife Deborah, we see a wonderfully, caring, and courageous young woman who loves, cares for and nurtures Clive in the hellish existence which has become their life. She does this for the man she dearly loves and who loves her in return (they are truly "one".) Only when the book is ending, after Deborah has sought solace and answers from a long way from home, does she find what she has been seeking; the ultimate help with which to continue her life with the only man she truly loves. No-one should ever have to go through anything as dreadful as this.....yet without going through this pain, tragedy and loneliness endured by both Clive and Deborah - in different ways, we are privy to the old adage that "Love conquers all". A very personal insight into their lives - a privilege to read, an inspiration to all.

7 of 7 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars The Saddest Love Story in the World, January 13, 2009

By 

Robert Carlberg (Seattle) - See all my reviews
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This review is from: Forever Today: A True Story of Lost Memory and Never-Ending Love (Paperback)

Deborah Wearing was married to Clive just 18 months when he was struck with viral encephalitis, which destroyed large portions of his brain including his hippocampus. Ever since then, Clive has been unable to make any new memories. Every day, every hour -- every few minutes -- he finds himself waking anew for the first time ever.

Two things he knows: 1) something terrible has happened to him (because he has a black hole where his memory should be) and 2) he loves his wife Deborah.

Every time he sees her, he thinks it's the first time in a long time. Even if it's only been a couple of minutes....

Deborah's heartbreaking story is told with intelligence and admirable strength, as she navigates the unfamiliar shoals of dealing with catastrophic brain injury, a National Health Service unprepared to deal with healthy-but-dependent patients, her own frustration with Clive's 7-second attention span, and the guilt of leaving him with caregivers. She's a remarkably persistent woman to have accomplished all that she has for ABI (acquired brain injury) patients while simultaneously nurturing one of her own.

Clive was an accomplished musician and conductor before the injury (working with among others John Taverner and Michael Nyman), and his musical abilities are oddly untouched by his amnesia. Stories of him sight-reading scores, playing the piano or conducting his choral group send shivers up the spine.

As a former publicist Deborah's writing is fluid, engaging and moving, making this book difficult to interrupt. She rarely indulges in maudlin self-pity, although she would have every right. Clive's story has been filmed at least twice, and featured in two Oliver Sacks books, and from that evidence Deborah if anything understates the tragedy of her situation.

In the last chapter she describes turning to religion for solace, and one can't help but draw parallels between these two anchors in her life.

A fascinating fascinating book.

3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:

3.0 out of 5 stars a bit scattered, but fascinating and quite moving, August 16, 2010

By 

Abeer Y. Hoque (New York City) - See all my reviews
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This review is from: Forever Today (Hardcover)

'Forever Today' is a memoir by Deborah Wearing, the devoted wife of Clive Wearing, a highly intelligent and accomplished musician and conductor whose brain was half eaten away by a virus, causing him to have the worst case of amnesia then known - lasting only a few seconds at a time. He remembered who he was, his history until a few years before the devastating infection, and his immense love for his wife. Like most dense amnesiacs, he retained no ability to make new memories, but fascinatingly was able to function almost normally when conducting familiar music.

It's not just his story, but also a story of her love, which is remarkable and touching for its perseverance and depth. And it's a story about the British medical and insurance system, and how Mrs. Wearing helped change the landscape and care for Britons with ABI (Acquired Brain Injury).

I thought the last third got a bit scattered and tangential, and needed a good editor. But in any case, like many books on dementia and memory loss that I've read, FT is both wrenching and inspiring in showing how the families of those affected learn to accept and find joy in ever smaller successes.