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Forty Beads: The Simple, Sexy Secret for Transforming Your Marriage [Paperback]

Carolyn Evans
4.3 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (36 customer reviews)

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Book Description

April 26, 2011
With a hilarious, tell-it-like-it-is, girlfriend-to-girlfriend tone, author Carolyn Evans provides married women with an innovative method that is sure to breathe new life into their marital relationship. The Forty Beads Method works by dissolving the negative tension that builds around sex (specifically, the frequency with which it does or does not occur) and replacing it with the sex life you always thought you should have, which in turn creates the relationship you've always wanted. In 40 short chapters, author Carolyn Evans illuminates her readers in psychologically-savvy detail why sex is so important to the success of a marriage, and exactly how to put it to the front burner of their relationship in a playful, fun way.

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Forty Beads: The Simple, Sexy Secret for Transforming Your Marriage + The Forty Beads Gift + The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts
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Editorial Reviews

Review

Kirkus, 4/1/11
A creative catalyst for remedying an ailing sex life. When Evans was facing a particularly arduous period in her marriage, she knew she needed to do something to reignite her love life. She decided to offer her husband sex on a daily basis for 40 straight days, marking each one off with the drop of a Venetian bead into a mason jar. Thus was born the Forty Beads Method, an approach that “assumes a disparity that often exists between the male and female libidos and offers a way to close the gap.” Evans’ observations about sex and marriage and advice for other couples who want to try this at home are laced with attention-grabbing anecdotes and humor. When she explained her plan to her husband, she writes, he "looked at me as if I were Venus, the Goddess of Love, sailing into the bedroom on a clamshell." But she makes unsubstantiated and sweeping generalizations about men throughout the text, most notably in "Sex: The Deal," in which she writes, “Men love sex and for most of them, it’s their favorite thing in the whole world.” She employs limited scientific evidence to justify her oversimplified views. And while the author invites homosexuals to try this method, she fails to suggest any possible modifications to the heterosexual approach to her program. Also includes guidelines for creating a supportive community of Beaders. For women who need help dealing with the sexual power struggles of their relationship.

Kim Barnouin, Co-Author of The New York Times #1 Bestseller Skinny Bitch
"Forty Beads made me laugh out loud and take notes.  Going on 10 years of marriage, I could totally relate to this book.  I read it at just the right time, and my husband will be indebted to Carolyn Evans for her wisdom for many years. A must read for all women."

Fiftyisthenewforty.net, May 2011
“With a keen sense of humor entirely devoid of snarky or resentful undertones, Evans makes it crystal clear that the key difference between men and women is that “men have to have sex to feel close, and conversely, a woman has to feel close to her husband to want to have sex with him.”  Bingo.”

 

About the Author

Carolyn Evans, MSW developed The Forty Beads Method quite by accident, but when it changed her marriage in such an incredible way, she just had to share it with everyone. A singer/songwriter and former therapist, Carolyn writes for Skirt! Magazine and spends time meeting with her fellow “Beaders” as she supports the growing Forty Beads nation.


Product Details

  • Paperback: 214 pages
  • Publisher: Running Press (April 26, 2011)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0762439289
  • ISBN-13: 978-0762439287
  • Product Dimensions: 7.3 x 5.3 x 0.6 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 8.3 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.3 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (36 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #35,930 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

About Carolyn Evans

Carolyn Evans, author of Forty Beads; The Simple, Sexy Secret for Transforming Your Marriage, is writing this book because she just has to tell you. .Because she hopes that The Forty Beads Method -- a method she developed quite by accident -- just might change your marriage and your life in the same profoundly positive way that it has changed her life and the lives of other women who've tried it.

Before stumbling across The Forty Beads Method, Evans was an aspiring singer/songwriter who recorded two records and performed regularly with her band. She continues to write songs -- mainly country music, but hung up the late-night performing grind in favor of achieving a healthy circadian rhythm and a happy home life. These days Evans spends her time meeting with women -- both online and in person -- who are using the Forty Beads Method as she supports the growing Forty Beads Community. Evans majored in psychology at the University of the South and holds a master's in social work degree from the University of Georgia. She lives in Charleston, South Carolina with her husband, two children and their big black Lab.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
17 of 17 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars changed my life!!! May 20, 2012
Format:Paperback
I saw Carolyn on the TODAY show and thought she was funny and real and that the book sounded interesting, so I bought it. I was not disappointed... this book was so true to my life it was almost uncanny. I adore my husband, we have great sex when we have it... but it always seems like he's groping me and hounding me for it and I'm looking for a reason to avoid it. The more he hounds and gropes, the more I avoid--and the madder I get. Nobody wins.

So I read this book. And I got some beads. And then... I did nothing for six months. The beads sat on a shelf collecting dust. I was terrified to give them to my husband, because I just knew he was going to engage in what Evans calls "obsessive bead dropping", which wouldn't really help the situation. For some reason those damned beads taunted me, though, so for our anniversary I decided to give him the beads. I'll be honest--it wasn't the most gracious of gifts. I basically told him that if he abused the beads I'd just take them back and the deal would be off. (I think that's against the rules, but I needed my little escape clause.)

But a funny thing happened. He didn't get obsessive or abuse the beads AT ALL. He was always a great guy--the ONE thing that bugged me was the groping/begging... and it STOPPED. Almost immediately. Suddenly instead of avoiding all talk about sex, we were laughing about it together. He'd drop a bead in my bowl and swagger around the place like some kind of king or cowboy--which of course made me laugh, which makes me love him even more.

If you're hesitant to try this method, what do you have to lose? If sex is an issue in your marriage, you're probably sick of talking and arguing about it. The beads take that pressure off, and make sex fun again. Take it from someone who was genuinely afraid to get started, and now actually looks forward to hearing the "plink!" of a bead in my bead catcher.
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10 of 10 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars I want the whole world to know about it!!! August 31, 2012
Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase
It is one of the best books I was recommended to read and I can't wait to start Beading! Thank you for so honestly sharing your intimacy and experience with us.

3 months later...
When I reviewed this amazing book, I had just finished to read it, hoping and excited it will bring something adventurous to our intimate life!
And it did! Big time! I love this method, and so does my husband!
It is fun, adventurous, challenging at times, and so strengthening and reinforcing our amazing love.
I want the whole world to know about it!!! BUY BUY BUY!!!
Was this review helpful to you?
12 of 14 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars What a fun book! July 8, 2011
Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase
I really enjoyed the book. The fourty beads method was just what my husband and I needed in our marriage.
After 25 years, it took all the pressure off sex and made it fun again!
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Would recommend
Awsome book to learn how to rekindle the fire and bring closeness to your marriage.Also it helps us be on the same page about sexual needs.
Published 16 days ago by Darwin
5.0 out of 5 stars so excited to try
being married 27 years and 4 kids now all in college and grad school and my husband only being 51 and me 48 its time to get back to being "us" again and getting to know... Read more
Published 20 days ago by Robin L. Regan
5.0 out of 5 stars WOW
This book is amazing! Such a simple process, yet effective. It completely transformed our marriage. I highly recommend it for everyone!
Published 1 month ago by Corinne Mathiesen
5.0 out of 5 stars A great idea, beads or not
We got this book and use the concept. It adds some fun, amour, and zest to our loving, and takes some of the occasional ackwardness away. Read more
Published 1 month ago by David P. Hooker
5.0 out of 5 stars Sometimes we all need a plan
I very much enjoyed reading this book. Relationships are hard enough, but when you add kids intimacy can suffer. This book comes up with a solution that keeps it simple. Read more
Published 2 months ago by DBOneTime
4.0 out of 5 stars So far so good
I'm still reading this book but so far I love it! I love that it reads like you are talking to a friend. It's got common sense, humor and great information!
Published 2 months ago by Crystal L. Stone
5.0 out of 5 stars Forty Beads
I would recommend this to any couple who wants to just add some fun to their love life! My husband and I have been no I have thoroughly enjoyed this book and continue to. Read more
Published 2 months ago by Amy H,
5.0 out of 5 stars Great! Can't wait to start!
This is fantastic. We aren't even in a slump, and I think it's going to be really great for our marriage. Read more
Published 2 months ago by J. Wentzell
5.0 out of 5 stars This book is great!
I saw this book/author on The Doctors and ordered immediately. I read this book in one night! It is such a fun read that you won't want to get up. Read more
Published 3 months ago by rain
5.0 out of 5 stars So simple
Wow felt like I was talking to a close friend reading this book. I am excited to start beading with Valentine's day coming it'll work out perfectly.
Published 3 months ago by Laurie L.
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