Customer Reviews

The Four Conversations: Daily Communication That Gets Results

5 star:		(12)
4 star:		(1)
3 star:		(0)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

At a recent Board Meeting where our non-profit organization struggled over some challenging programmatic and fiscal decisions, one Board member remarked that "Hope is not a strategy."
The Four Conversations gives design, strategy, and tools for designing the future through understanding how productive conversation works, bringing clarity to daily communications, and illustrating with realtistic scenarios workplace pitfalls and the role conversational design and patterns play. The tools for a successful conversational workplace- and strategies to replace the vague strategy of hope- were exactly the impetus I needed.

As a manager I have read several different books to assist with communication. They are often filled with complex charts and theories and are problematic in both theory and execution. The Four Conversations is not one of those books! This is probably the single most effective communication tool I have used.
At work, I have started to experiment with the different conversations. I have been able to identify where my communication was ineffective, and how I am contributing to entertaining the excuses for poor performance and missed deadlines. I will say that in the short time I have been using the 4 conversations, I have gotten what I wanted earlier. I would say that so far I am saving myself at minimum of 2-4 hours a week. Making the expectations clear and getting good promises has been the biggest help, along with having the closure conversations and acknowledging what has not been done.

Not only useful in my professional life, The Four Conversations have been effective in my personal life as well My wife always "loves" when I read a new communication book. Occasionally, she will say "So what wondrous book are you reading now?" Applying this book to communication with my wife has made for a happier home as well! Instead of thinking that she should know what I want, I have been more direct in communication at home. On a side note, this has been one book I have read that she has not minded. (very effective!)

I would HIGHLY recommend this book to anyone who is interested in increasing the effectiveness of their communication either personally or professionally. I believe this should be required reading for anyone who manages others in an organization.

The Ford's have co-authored a very valuable book, especially for individuals with management and leadership responsibilities. The book is very well-written and organized; accordingly, it is engaging and easy to read in a single sitting. Very practical tactics and examples are presented regarding recommended and effective ways to interact and comunicate with others. This book will contribute to your professional development and be a valuable addition to your personal library.

The Four Conversations: Daily Communications That Gets Results explains the types of conversations needed to move an idea through to its fulfillment. Using real life examples of failures that are turned into successes by using the correct conversation, Jeffrey and Laurie Ford open the door to a new level of effectiveness and partnership in all aspects of life. In a clear and appealingly conversational tone, they guide you through the four conversations, making them tools to put into immediate use. Whether you are having a conversation with a neighbor to resolve a community issue or launching an idea to change the world, this is the book you want to reference.

If you want to have more productive conversations with people, this book is clearly a winner. It is clear and simple and instantly usable. I added just a few things to what I say and it is making all the difference in the world in how people are responding to me.

I am a coach and after a first read I was able to put it to use effectively with a client who grabbed the concept with lit up eyes. My mind is seeing applications for the tools in this book all over the place.

Lately, I have become fascinated with the questions words: Who? What? When? Where? Why? How?

We use those queries to navigate the world. Jeffrey and Laurie Ford show the same thing in The Four Conversations but through the lens of management and with the interchanges that should be taking place in the workplace.

The Fords believe conversation can be classified into four types. Initiative conversations set the vision and direction, like John F. Kennedy's 1961 speech that committed putting men on the moon. If initiative conversations are about what, when, and why, understanding discussions answer the who and the how. These conversations ground individuals at the start of a project by laying out the roles they will play, and reinforce the value of the initiative. Understanding conversations do not create action, however; that's the purpose of performance conversations: ask that something be done and obtain a promise for completion. Closure conversations mark an ending and create the opportunity for new beginnings.

The authors also point out that we favor some kinds of discussion. Most of us overuse understanding conversation thinking we need to spend extra time getting buying, when managers would get better results with a balanced and intentional approach to the conversations we use with reports.

Reducing tardiness on projects comes from using all four types of conversation effectively. Closure conversations heal wounds. Interrogating excuses through performance discussions can reveal whether individuals did everything they could. Altering the rate of progress toward a goal is as simple as increasing the frequency and the magnitude of what you ask for.

"Of course." is what I kept thinking as I read the book. The Four Conversations is a good book for new managers and even better book for long time managers, as they'll easily recognize the power of the conversations prescribed.

The Four Conversations has impacted both my professional & personal life. Since I am still new to the concepts suggested in the book, I do not believe that I have developed a new way of speaking. This will continue to be a work-in-process. However, I noticed a very immediate change in the way that I am listening to conversations. As I am engaged in certain conversations - mostly centered upon some type of conflict - I find myself classifying the conversations that are occurring, as well as, the conversations that led to the current predicament. This has been extremely helpful in making certain closure is reached, and a new beginning may start - no matter the difficulty.

In addition, I have spent consdierable time examining the framework of Initiative Statements within the context of my role as a Sales Representative. In particular, framing the statement and "accomplishment ingredients" in a way that will differentiate my organization from competitors. Before each "opportunity" call, I am making certain that my "pitch" clearly states the what, when, & why. For the brief amount of time that I have been utilizing this strategy, it has brought structure and greater clarity to what it is that I believe both organizations want out of a potential partnership.

This book is a must read for all of those who depend upon communication for success (everyone).

Some of the work we do in client organizations is designed to help people develop new behaviors for themselves and those they work with. The key way we do this is to have our clients focus on their communication patterns - their habitual conversations with others.

When clients discover how their conversations limit their personal and organizational results, they want to know what new practices they can adopt - how can they change their communications to achieve alignment, foster engagement and collaboration , and promote accountability.

It is in this arena that the Fords have modeled these "conversations" - conversations that have people more effectively act, understand, relate and complete their work. The Four Conversations explores four different types of communication that when used appropriately, will have a positive impact on the results people produce when working with others.

This is not a hard or lengthy read. It's a book I recommend to my clients, and to anyone interested in better relationships, greater success, and more productive communication.

Brian J. Stuhlmuller
Sr. V.P.
Distinctions, Inc.

Nobody would ever describe me as an introvert, or someone who isn't willing or able to speak my mind - I've always had the ability to talk. But at the same time, I was lacking the skills needed to express my ideas effectively, or enhance my working relationships. I needed to learn how to focus my talk in the right way in order to feel confident in my personal communication, and to achieve the results I wanted. What "The Four Conversations" provided was a way to get past all of the programmatic ways of thinking about communication that tend to either make communication seem too difficult, or teach you that if you don't communicate in a certain set pattern it won't work out in the end. Throughout the quarter, I learned that we overthink the process of management way too much, and that in doing so we actually create more obstacles for ourselves. There are enough obstacles in organizations as it is, not knowing how to approach someone shouldn't be one of them. Knowing how to use the Four Conversations gives me a huge advantage in my role as project manager. In my interpersonal relationships at work, I've been able to not only create accountability that wasn't existent otherwise, and I've also been able to get over my personal fear of proposing new ideas to senior management - simply because I knew what types of conversations to have and how to make them work.

Strange that nearly all of the five-star reviews for this book are from users who have submitted only one review...

Anyway, this is a basic blocking & tackling management book that focuses on daily conversations with your direct reports and also with matrixed resources who do not report to you. There is nothing groundbreaking here, but they do such a good job walking you through the purpose and application of these conversations that you're definitely going to learn something. I immediately took away some solid insights that I want to apply to my team.

Loses one star for its repetitiveness (which makes the book 40 pages longer than it should be), the cornball examples (many of which sound contrived), and the overly simplistic--almost childlike--tone of the author.

Overall though I like this and recommend it particularly to new managers!

NOTE TO KINDLE USERS: The publisher has set an unusually low limit on the number of highlight "clippings" that you can make in this book. After reading it I opened my clippings file and discovered that all of my clips from the second half of the book were replaced with, "You have reached the clipping limit for this item". Very irritating.