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Free from Lies: Discovering Your True Needs Hardcover – June 29, 2009

4.6 out of 5 stars 23 customer reviews

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Frequently Bought Together

  • Free from Lies: Discovering Your True Needs
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  • The Drama of the Gifted Child: The Search for the True Self, Revised Edition
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  • The Body Never Lies: The Lingering Effects of Hurtful Parenting
Total price: $43.05
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Editorial Reviews

Review

Free from Lies is a clarion call from one of the great psychological minds of our time. — Stephen Kamsi, Saybrook Graduate School, San Francisco

About the Author

Alice Miller (1923-2010) is the author of such classic works as The Drama of the Gifted Child, Prisoners of Childhood, The Body Never Lies, From Rage to Courage, and Free from Lies.
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Product Details

  • Hardcover: 282 pages
  • Publisher: W. W. Norton & Company (June 29, 2009)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0393069133
  • ISBN-13: 978-0393069136
  • Product Dimensions: 5.9 x 1.1 x 8.6 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 13.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (23 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,049,472 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

Top Customer Reviews

Format: Hardcover
This was the first book by Alice Miller I've ever read and I found it interesting, although according to her very broad definition, most, if not all of us are the victims of physical/emotional/psychological childhood abuse of some sort or other - it definitely made me view my own childhood in a new light.

Unfortunately, about half the book consist of her responses to letters or e-mails she has received, a transcript of a lengthy interview, and what appears to be an autobiographical letter to her daughter and her own mother. - The author had my full attention for the first half of the book but she lost me in the second part.

To sum it up: If you are looking for a "ten steps" kind of book, this is not it. "Free From Lies" will give you an overview of Ms. Miller's views on how deeply childhood abuse affects us as adults. It will encourage you to seek an "empathic therapist" rather than a therapist who confirms the patient's deep-seated conviction that somehow the treatment she/he received from her parents as a child was normal or her/his fault or even deserved. The book will also give you some basic tips as to how to find a suitable therapist.

Save your money and get it from the local library!
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By Jenny on October 13, 2009
Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
Childhood, the base for the rest of our lives... why as parents would we ever choose to make it a cruel base?

It is time to wake up, stop repeating what was done to us, discover new loving ways to treat our children, admit our parents did it wrong and not feel the need in the very same breath to excuse that.

We all have choices in life, we do not have to spank/beat our kids just because it was done to us. We can think for ourselves and realize that hitting a child can NeVeR be right or justified. Alice Miller suggests we think of a giant coming over to us and hitting us over and over... How would you feel? Scared, petrified, humiliated? Yes, all of these things plus more unwanted feelings. Talking and teaching with kindness is so much better in every way. Wouldn't it be great to live in a world where all the people were brought up with love, hugs and kisses, and kindness and when that person did something that was perceived as wrong, that instead of punishment and spanking, got a gentle explanation. The prisons would be empty.
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Format: Hardcover
FREE FROM LIES: DISCOVERING YOUR TRUE NEEDS is from any who denied that they suffered physical and emotional abuse as children. Former victims can heal by discovering and acknowledging their true history instead of denying it - and this explains why a therapist should become a witness to the survivor of such cruelty rather than the usual neutral therapeutic role. A powerful survey, this is a pick for any general or health lending library.
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Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
I have read many of Alice Miller's books, starting with the Drama of the Gifted Child, which was recommended to me by my psychotherapist. It changed my life. Then I read many more of her books, including the book of her self-therapeutic artwork. Her analysis of how childhood abuse produces a monster like Adolf Hitler (and Joseph Stalin and others) is very valuable. However, she has only one theme: childhood abuse is uniquitous and destructive of the person. Abused children become damaged adults, sometimes carrying on the abuse on their own children. This is a valuable theme, but how many books does it take to say it? Maybe she wrote book after book, all saying the same thing, in an effort to reach new audiences. She even tried to interest the Pope in taking up the cause.
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Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
In this book, Alice Miller shows how we can really free ourselves — and save our lives — by finding the true history of our childhood and recognizing the lies and hypocrisy so prevalent in our society. I loved that she included some of the articles published on her website because it’s much easier to read them in the book and digest the insights. This book really helped me permanently remove the invisible reins of guilt, fear and shame put upon me by my childhood abusers, so that no one else could grab them to keep me hostage and chained in their emotional traps.
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Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
I found this book very helpful in seeing through the lies I grew up with and working toward overcoming them and making my life my own.
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Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Alice Miller is especially skilled at defining these complex relationships with completely understandable descriptions. I wish there were audio versions, but other than that, this is her best book yet.
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Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
I am 82 years of age, my life's work has been uncovering those "lies", understanding the origins, human beings propensity to 'pass on' unto the 3rd and 4th generations those same lies.
I have most of Alice Millers books and my gratitude to her for her 'expose of this human phenomonon' is the most important piece of my search for meaning in my life.
I do not cease to be amazed at the human pschye. It's protection against the ''blows' of ignorance, it's ability to heal and restore itself,
and create within the ability to overcome the long ago abuse and once again be the wonderful loving person we were at birth.
All of that is not without struggle throughout life. Even now, I have to return to the basics, and separate where my negative emotions
are coming from. It remains a continuing mental and emotional battle to 'find' the REAL me. Without Alice's books, I cannot imagine where I might be. Thank you so very much!
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