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Free from Lies: Discovering Your True Needs Paperback – June 7, 2010


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Free from Lies: Discovering Your True Needs + The Drama of the Gifted Child: The Search for the True Self, Revised Edition + The Body Never Lies: The Lingering Effects of Hurtful Parenting
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Product Details

  • Paperback 288 pages
  • Publisher: W. W. Norton & Company (June 7, 2010)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0393338509
  • ISBN-13: 978-0393338508
  • Product Dimensions: 8.2 x 5.5 x 0.7 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 7.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (18 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #122,197 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

Review

Free from Lies is a clarion call from one of the great psychological minds of our time.” (Stephen Kamsi, Saybrook Graduate School, San Francisco)

About the Author

Alice Miller (1923-2010) is the author of such classic works as The Drama of the Gifted Child, Prisoners of Childhood, The Body Never Lies, From Rage to Courage, and Free from Lies.

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Customer Reviews

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As can be said of her other books, well worth reading and keeping.
mizbehaves
Alice Miller is especially skilled at defining these complex relationships with completely understandable descriptions.
DAG
If you want to change the way you view the world and the people in it, read her book, any of her books.
Benita Lee

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

62 of 70 people found the following review helpful By Nico1908 on August 12, 2009
Format: Hardcover
This was the first book by Alice Miller I've ever read and I found it interesting, although according to her very broad definition, most, if not all of us are the victims of physical/emotional/psychological childhood abuse of some sort or other - it definitely made me view my own childhood in a new light.

Unfortunately, about half the book consist of her responses to letters or e-mails she has received, a transcript of a lengthy interview, and what appears to be an autobiographical letter to her daughter and her own mother. - The author had my full attention for the first half of the book but she lost me in the second part.

To sum it up: If you are looking for a "ten steps" kind of book, this is not it. "Free From Lies" will give you an overview of Ms. Miller's views on how deeply childhood abuse affects us as adults. It will encourage you to seek an "empathic therapist" rather than a therapist who confirms the patient's deep-seated conviction that somehow the treatment she/he received from her parents as a child was normal or her/his fault or even deserved. The book will also give you some basic tips as to how to find a suitable therapist.

Save your money and get it from the local library!
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29 of 32 people found the following review helpful By Midwest Book Review on September 15, 2009
Format: Hardcover
FREE FROM LIES: DISCOVERING YOUR TRUE NEEDS is from any who denied that they suffered physical and emotional abuse as children. Former victims can heal by discovering and acknowledging their true history instead of denying it - and this explains why a therapist should become a witness to the survivor of such cruelty rather than the usual neutral therapeutic role. A powerful survey, this is a pick for any general or health lending library.
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41 of 48 people found the following review helpful By Jenny on October 13, 2009
Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
Childhood, the base for the rest of our lives... why as parents would we ever choose to make it a cruel base?

It is time to wake up, stop repeating what was done to us, discover new loving ways to treat our children, admit our parents did it wrong and not feel the need in the very same breath to excuse that.

We all have choices in life, we do not have to spank/beat our kids just because it was done to us. We can think for ourselves and realize that hitting a child can NeVeR be right or justified. Alice Miller suggests we think of a giant coming over to us and hitting us over and over... How would you feel? Scared, petrified, humiliated? Yes, all of these things plus more unwanted feelings. Talking and teaching with kindness is so much better in every way. Wouldn't it be great to live in a world where all the people were brought up with love, hugs and kisses, and kindness and when that person did something that was perceived as wrong, that instead of punishment and spanking, got a gentle explanation. The prisons would be empty.
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16 of 18 people found the following review helpful By Amazon Customer on October 23, 2009
Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
I found this book very helpful in seeing through the lies I grew up with and working toward overcoming them and making my life my own.
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14 of 18 people found the following review helpful By Madelene on August 30, 2009
Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
I know the value of this writer's material (Alice Miller) - she did not disappoint. All her books, including this one, are excellent tools for identifying those vague uncomfortable feelings that become emotional blocks.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful By DAG on November 23, 2012
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Alice Miller is especially skilled at defining these complex relationships with completely understandable descriptions. I wish there were audio versions, but other than that, this is her best book yet.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By mizbehaves on June 7, 2013
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Another insightful book from Miller, in which she explores the traumas of childhood and the methods for overcoming them.

As can be said of her other books, well worth reading and keeping.
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4 of 5 people found the following review helpful By Evalyn F. Segal on December 26, 2012
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
I have read many of Alice Miller's books, starting with the Drama of the Gifted Child, which was recommended to me by my psychotherapist. It changed my life. Then I read many more of her books, including the book of her self-therapeutic artwork. Her analysis of how childhood abuse produces a monster like Adolf Hitler (and Joseph Stalin and others) is very valuable. However, she has only one theme: childhood abuse is uniquitous and destructive of the person. Abused children become damaged adults, sometimes carrying on the abuse on their own children. This is a valuable theme, but how many books does it take to say it? Maybe she wrote book after book, all saying the same thing, in an effort to reach new audiences. She even tried to interest the Pope in taking up the cause.
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