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Freedom's Just Another Word

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I have read Dan Hays' book FREEDOM'S JUST ANOTHER WORD twice now, and I have found it to be one of the honest accounts of a man's journey to find himself by dealing with the problems of his past. All of us know someone who has been scarred in their youth by some form of abuse or neglect. I believe, though, if we take the time to analyze why some people choose the path in life that they do, we can also see that there is at times some unfinished business in their past that needs to be resolved.

Dan didn't just accept the effects of his troubled past. He made the conscious decision to look at the cause and find a way to bring some form of closure to it. It's not an easy process, but meaningful change is never easy. That doesn't mean, however, that it's not possible with hard work.

This is a beautifully written story of a man's spiritual journey toward emotional healing. It tells the story of the author's relationship with the father he has grown, through the course of a difficult childhood, to love and respect. In the course of the story he begins to reconcile that man with the father he ultimately remembers. Although there is some recounting of instances of abuse, the author does not dwell on them, merely recounts them as part of the journey. He struggles to uncover the hidden pain and the hidden past that have limited his life and move beyond them to reconciliation with his memories, himself, and God. I felt that this was an intense memoir, but not the type of "victim" literature that has saturated the market in the last few years. This is the story of healing and a trek toward light, love and forgiveness. I would recommend this book to anyone struggling with issues of abuse, alcoholism, self-doubt, or anyone looking for an inspirational story of one person's triumph of over the forces of inner darkness.

Dan's book is the hope of healing from the pain and shame of an abusive childhood and all the possibilities that entails. "Freedom is just another word" reminded me of so many of my own issues and made me realize that I am not alone in my experience: I too grew up in a household riddled with alcoholism and then my father left us to fend for ourselves. As an adult, I have blown great job interviews through the same terror of being validated or selected...or even being trapped. When you are abandoned as a child you think you have to get "picked" and once you do then you go out and do it again and again, because "not getting picked" is your own personal story which you recreate until you finally choose to do the work in order to get healed. Dan examines the correlation between our earthly Father and our heavenly father; he disconnects the two to find peace. Dan asks the questions that most people would rather shove under the rug and forget about. My favorite part is when Dan visualizes the "cord of anger" that is "cut off with a chain saw." Mine was a tree branch that needed to be snapped, and to this day I visualize this when circumstance is trying for me. Each step of Dan's journey takes the reader closer to their closure, slowly, methodically; leaving no stone unturned. Through this difficult journey he is ultimately healed. I highly recommend this book for anyone looking for true complete healing from alcoholism or abuse or whatever. Dan's book will point the way out.

In Freedom's Just Another Word, Dan Hayes retraces some of his childhood memories of places he lived which returns forgotten or blocked memories of his childhood to Dan - things he wasn't sure that he wanted to remember. Want to or not, Dan knew he needed to remember to release the blocks that were killing him and blocking his potential success in life and his career.

The memories that Dan recovered initially brought up a lot of pain and terror to Dan's mind and body. Those memories brought up rage over incidents in his childhood, anger at his dad and at God. Dan saw his human father as being punishing, unforgiving and uncaring. He saw God in the same harsh light. In remembering his childhood, Dan discovered an alcoholic father who beat young Danny when the father was in alcoholic blackouts. Through the pages of his book, you see Dan able to reclaim the parts of his soul that he thought his dad had murdered during the alcoholic blackouts.

Part of Dan's journey brought him face to face with a God that Dan was angry with. Dan came out the other side knowing that God had always taken care of him. Dan discovered that his anger at God was okay. Dan didn't die when he expressed his anger at God. God understood.

Reading Dan's book will cause me to go back and peel away more layers of my issues as an Adult Child of an Alcoholic and as an incest survivor. I am in awe of the healing that Dan has done. He is an inspiration to my own journey. When I read the last page of the book, I did not want the story to end. Thank God that Dan is writing more books about his journey to recovery.

Many of us have experienced difficulties in our relationships; Dan L Hays brings to light a poignant story of dealing with a parent who didn't know how to deal with the frustration, pain and anguish of never feeling things were quite good enough. In this case, the struggles were with his father; a man the author loved but never understood what drove him to act the way he did; with beligerence and a hostile sense of angst.

Many of us experience similar parental relationship issues; it took a very long time for Hays to come to terms with his father's anguish, especially since it manifested itself through a confusing and demoralizing dose of physical and mental abuse. The low self-esteem that resulted for Hays nearly ended in total despair; yet he had the courage to seek counseling, and wasn't afraid to admit he was a lost soul.

It would've been very easy for Hays to have simply written his father off, as so many in similar situations have done. However, he sensed his father's tortured existence wasn't a choice he really wanted to make; he simply didn't know how to deal with the emotions that overcame him during his life. Hays not only uncovers what made his father feel so despondent for the entire time he interacted with him; he also gets to the root of his own problems as well.

The way Hays is able to resolve all the conflict that tortured him in his life, makes for a most uplifting and spiritually enlightening conclusion to this wonderful story. We all could learn something from Hays' life's experiences. It's truly a moving and emotionally charged narrative; it'll make you a better person for having read it.

Once you start to read "Freedom's Just Another Word" you won't be able to stop. It is a love story between a father and a son who have been torn apart and spiritually tortured by the disease of alcoholism. Dan L Hays gives his readers a realistic intimate accounting of his struggles and triumphs throughout his journey to overcome the obstacles placed in his life as a result of having an abusive alcoholic father. He brilliantly tells his story in a way that the average person can relate. It comes from his heart. His gut wrenching descriptions of what he experienced during his desperate low points bring you into his nightmare in a way that you will feel his pain whether you have a frame of reference of your own or not.
You will cry and with him.
When he shares his triumphs you will feel his relief and joy that he survived another hurdle...you will feel like he is next to you telling you his story face to face...and you will want to reach out and pat him on the back and congratulate him.
You will celebrate with him.
If you have ever wondered what all the talk was about concerning alcoholism and adult children of alcoholics, this book will give you the most vivid up close and personal true to life description you could ever want.
Ultimately, Dan's courage to tell his amazing story sends a message to those fighting their own battle, regardless of its nature, that the human spirit can and will survive the worst of the worst...that love can heal anything. His is a story that needed to be written for his healing and needs to be read for the benefit for all.

This book is more than a trip out of darkness: It's a man's journey through emotions and life experiences. FREEDOM'S JUST ANOTHER WORD will touch most each of us, but in different ways. I identified with the author's journey, but more with his feelings of loneliness and not belonging. I've been there, and it wasn't a pleasant journey to arrive where I am. When you read the pages of the book, you'll take that journey along with the author. And in the end, it WAS a good journey.

The Author shares his life with such transparency that it challenges you to take a good look at your own! A life story of a boy growing up in an alcoholic home.. but still longing to find that safe place- in his fathers heart. Dan draws you into his process of growing from a child into a man...but through all his pain- he learns to become a son! How the author uncovers his pain, walks through his pain and on into freedom is a must for all to read.
Dan may your life in writing continue to give others hope!

Kelly Parr
[...]

"Freedom's Just Another Word" is a powerful book for anyone who has had to deal with the aftermath of an abusive childhood. I was mesmerized from the first chapter! Dan's gifted writing immediately pulls you into his inner soul and you soon realize that this is not a "fluff" book but one written "straight from the gut." I was absolutely enthralled with his honesty and willingness to share with the reader his journey through the various stages of his journey to wholeness. Dan does what few authors do: he writes with brutal honesty and in so doing, his readers can immediately identify with him. This intense connection between the author and reader continues throughout the entire book.

For anyone who has "stuffed their pain" this book is a must read. It gives the blueprint on how to deal with those gnawing inner feelings of turmoil and how to not only bring them to the surface but to squarely face them. I appreciate Dan's candor and his courage to take us through his journey so that we can know how to obtain our own freedom from the past. I learned so much from his book about my own journey - although our stories are so different. This book talks about such deep inner pain, but it is not a book that will bum you out - it is a book full of hope and encouragement. Get ready for a powerful book that you cannot read without being deeply touched, educated and inspired. Never stop writing Dan - your gift is so desperately needed!

Linda Fossen, author "Out of the Miry Clay: Freedom from Childhood Sexual Abuse"

A courageous story of recovery from the effects of the alcoholism of his father, and a courageous telling of the story. Dan's story should inspire others who came from similar backgrounds to undertake the arduous journey of recovery. He not only tells you that it can be done, but how to do it.

I read the book almost at one sitting, having stopped only for a bite to eat. Dan's story unfolds like a mystery as he reveals step-by-step his process of recovery and his discoveries. In this it turned out to be a page tuner; I could hardly wait to get to the next page to find out what he learned and how he resolved the next issue.

Not only was it compelling reading and well written, but written well enough that it stands as the only Print on Demand book that I have read cover-to-cover.
Carl H. Slater. M.D.