Customer Reviews

French for Cats: All the French Your Cat Will Ever Need

5 star:		(14)
4 star:		(3)
3 star:		(0)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(1)

 

 

In this delightful little book, wonderfully and perceptively illustrated with humourous line-art drawings, you will, as the title suggests, find 'All the French Your Cat will Ever Need'. For those of you who follow my writing, you may find this review to be shorter than average. There is a good reason for this -- the book is shorter than average; about 80 pages or so, and on average fewer than 20 words per page.

In this volume, you will learn what a French cat (le chat) does...

Je miaule, Je ronronne, Je dors
(I meow, I purr, I sleep)

Je cours rapidement d'une piece a l'autre sans aucune raison apparente
(I run rapidly from room to room for no apparent reason)

Je reste assis et je regarde fixement dans le vide pendant des heures
(I sit and stare at nothing for hours on end)

...and does not do...

Je ne cours pas apres les voitures
(I do not chase cars)

Je n'attrape pas les Frisbees dans ma bouche
(I do not catch Frisbees in my mouth)

Of course, the French cat will need appropriate food (gourmet, no less)...

L'Oiseau, La Souris, Le Poisson, Le Vilaine Grosse Bestiole
(the bird, the mouse, the fish, the big ugly bug)

...served in an elegant manner...

Le Bol pour Manger
(the Food Bowl)

...served at the appropriate time.

Je veux qu'on remplisse mon bol
(I want food in my bowl)

Je veux qu'on remplisse mon bol immediatement
(I want food in my bowl now)

...

J'attends qu'on me serve...
(I'm waiting...)

Of course, a responsible cat person will need to subject le chat to the occasion unpleasant experience...

Surtout je n'aime pas aller chez le veterinaire
(I really do not like to go to the vet)

Je ne veux pas qu'on me pique avec une aiguille enorme
(I do not want to be studck with a huge needle)

Je ne veux pas etre chatre
(I do not want to be neutered)

So, if you ever wondered what it would be like for your cat to produce a fur-ball in French (voila!) or the craftiness of French cat-thinking (how to get the enemy lawn mower to attack the bad neighbour child), this book is definitely for you.

Beware, however, even though this is 'All the French Your Cat Will Ever Need', there is a second helping, 'Advanced French for Exceptional Cats', to be found in a second volume exclusively for 'sophisticated cats as smart as yours'.

To be sure to understand le chat with savoir-faire, both volumes are an absolute necessity. Written by Henri de la Barbe (Henry Beard) (also know for scholarly necessities 'Latin for All Occasions' and 'Miss Piggy's Guide to Life'), and illustrated with wit and charm by Gary Zamchick, these books make delightful fun reading for an hour, and perfect gifts for cat lovers and francophiles alike.

Aside from being a very funny compendium of cat thought and behavior, this book helped me learn French by inspiring me to remember and use phrases such as "I think I am going to cough up a hairball" (useful in bad French restaurants) and "I prefer to bathe myself." The sentences may be cute and silly, but they are in proper French, with proper sentence structure, and simple enough to provide useful grammatical tools and vocabulary. The pictures are cute, too.

If nothing else, it will amuse your friends who love cats (and even those who don't).

I received this little book as a gift in 1991 and I still enjoy going through it. The author begins with the basics: The Cat (le Chat), cat parts, cat wardrobe, cat toys, cat names, etc. The text is written in a very "catty" attitude, and if you have cats, you will definitely appreciate it! The drawings are very cute and reflect the "cattitude" throughout -- a lifted eyebrow here, a scowl there. Some excerpts are particularly funny, as in the description of "What I Do": "I meow. I purr. I sit and stare at nothing for hours on end. I run rapidly from room to room for no apparent reason." (All cat owners will be nodding in understanding.) However, not only is the English amusing, the French is very accurate as well. After all, this IS a guide on speaking French... Monsieur de la Barbe demonstrates this with his translation of The Fur Ball: "I think I am going to cough up a fur ball...Here it comes now...(next page)...Voilà." My absolute favorite section of the book, though, is the trip to the vet. Male cat owners will definitely sympathize at the sight of the helpless kitty tied down to a table while lying on his back. The poor little guy has only one comment: "Je ne veux pas être châtré." ("I do not want to be neutered.") I keep my copy on my desk at work so that I can share the humor with others. If you know any cat lovers (even non-French-speaking ones!) and want to give them a lasting chuckle, this is the book! Merci beaucoup, M. de la Barbe!

Don't judge this dainty little book by its cover. While the artwork could pass for that in a children's book, the choice of phrases for translation targets a jaded adult sense of humor. The contrast between the two made me laugh that much harder.

Don't over think this one. This little book won't be mentioned on Oprah or noted at your book club. Just buy a used copy of this book and stuff it into your jacket pocket until you need to pass some time with a smile on your face. If you like cats or just want to brush-up on your French you'll find this colorfully illustrated book a delight. There is an added benefit beyond your amusement. You will find the experiences of "le chat" useful in social situations. The next time you are at a boring function remember what your feline friend would say.

Je crois que je vais cracher une boule de poils
(I think I am going to cough up a fur ball)

This is really a very funny book and it leaves one wondering if Mr Beard has been a cat in a previous life. His perception of all the French a cat would need is clear indeed.

If you know someone with a cat, this would make a very fine gift. Just don't leave it lying where their furry companion can find it - it may just give them some ideas! It would similarly make a great gift for a young person grappling with French lessons - it would give them something to astound their teacher with!

As a cat lover and as a (not so continuous) student of the French language, I thought this book was funny. The author has certainly captured the attitude of most cats in this world. If you want a chuckle here and there and to learn a little French along the way, then this is the book for you.

As both a French minor and a cat owner, this book touches on two worlds that are very dear to me! The book is extremely funny, and will be read and re-read time and time again. The French is charming as well, and at times is tongue-in-cheek. The "cat" name Garfield is translated Garchamps. (Those who have to be told that champs is the translation of "field" will miss the humor in this, Tant pis.) It is a bit pricy, which is why it is 4 stars instead of 5. But it is extremely funny. (Hélas, je me répète).

I "read" this book to my ailing kitty. He loved my imperfect* French as much as my perfect French. It was as much a healing endeavor** for me as it was a "goodbye kitty" for my beloved pet and decades-long companion.

* Out of practice for over 20 years
** Some stuff just remains, non?

If nothng else, fabricate a book, in any language. Our pets deserve the best.

This book used many words I hadn't used recently, and my kitty didn't know, but he beamed at me for trying to pronounce them. Thank you for helping me cope.

Sending you a purr....

WHETHER YOU HAVE A CAT - OT NOT- THIS BOOK IS FUN.
AS USUAL BEFORE ORDERING,I CHECKED THE "LOOK INSIDE THIS BOOK" PAGES, AND FOUND MYSELF LAUGHING. THE CAT COMMENTS ARE THE VERY THINGS ANY REASONABLE CAT WOULD MUTTER- OR MEOW. THE LINE DRAWINGS ARE APPEALING AS WELL.
I GAVE A COPY TO MY TEENAGE GRANDDAUGHTER WHO IS TAKING 1ST YEAR FRENCH IN SCHOOL. (WONDER HOW SHE'LL USE IT FOR EXTRA CREDIT...) NOW I NEED A COPY FOR MYSELF!