78 of 84 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Fun and Fast Read With Great Life Tips, July 13, 2009
This review is from: French Women Don't Sleep Alone (Paperback)
Sometimes a book can just strike you at the right moment. That's the way it was for me when I picked up a copy of Jamie Cat Callan's "French Women Don't Sleep Alone." I started reading and finished within two hours. I smiled all the way through.
Unlike some of the other Francophile lifestyle books like "
French Women Don't Get Fat" and "
Entre Nous: A Woman's Guide to Finding Her Inner French Girl," "French Women Don't Sleep Alone" may masquerade as pure fun, but the tips accrued by Callan in her efforts to understand the mystique of her French grandmother can be utilized by American women who have spent too much time becoming empowered rivals to their male counterparts rather than real flesh and blood women and mean more to its reader than learning how to tie a scarf, wear a pencil skirt and heels, eat small bites and leave food on your plate.
Callan is so right when she simply restates what is as plain as the nez on your visage: Men and women are different. Well, duh . . . Well, serious duh! We are different, however, for the last forty years we have been trying to be the same. We burnt our bras - (I didn't--I need mine) and let down our guards by `being honest' and `telling it like it is' (yes, I have been guilty of this.) But to what avail? Has it done us any good? Are we more enlightened or do we just become extremely cynical, eat more ice cream and kvetsh about the ten pounds we have gained? We complain about our men and try to change them--make them into sensitive women! Yes, we do. We want to be included in and consulted on everything they do, but then we scream when we discover that we have trained them to do absolutely nothing. We've made it too easy.
Callan concentrates her study on the French woman, but I think her comments encompass most Europeans. American women want their men to understand them while European women relish the fact that they don't. The worlds of men and women are different. Why not enjoy ours and let them enjoy theirs? What are we afraid that we will miss? Nothing that we actually want.
Wisely, Callan comments on the overt sexuality and celebrity worshiping generations of younger women that show it all while wishing they were someone else. European women know how to dress--classic pieces paired with something eclectic--a show of leg, maybe some cleavage, but never both at once. Elegant yet fun. Jeans that fit right, not the ones that some superstar wore.
So what's the secret that French women know that has eluded us on the other side of the pond? Once we find our mates we expect to be joined at the hip. We give up all our mystery; recount little things that bore us let alone our men. Instead of developing that woman that our man fell in love with in the first place, we become complacent and lazy, expecting to be entertained rather than independently continuing to grow while on our own paths. We expect one path to encompass two people and that really doesn't make any sense at all.
If my comments have intrigued you, Callan's free and easy prose will delight you. Her insights make her an honorary candidate for the next Marianne. She will teach you not to date, that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach, the power of keeping your life in tact through the coterie (your circle of friends) and most importantly, the escape to a secret garden.
Bottom line? Jamie Cat Callan's how-to on finding love, "French Women Don't Sleep Alone," is sure to please even the most disgruntled feminist. Fast, fun and insightful it comes highly recommended by this reviewer who spent a few hours in her own Jardin Secret while reading it. Oui, Oui!
Diana Faillace Von Behren
"reneofc"
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55 of 68 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars
There are better books on this topic, May 5, 2009
This review is from: French Women Don't Sleep Alone (Paperback)
I have spent a lot of time in France, have many French friends, have dated French men, and have read all the comparable books on this topic, so I was really looking forward to reading this one. What a letdown. For starters, a good proofreader/editor/translator would have been helpful...way too many grammatical and spelling errors (in both English and French...surely *someone* should have caught that Blvd. St. Michel is not Blvd. St. Mitchel)! That aside, this was nothing but a retread of all the books that Callan quoted in her own book(true, she did give the other authors credit), and those were better written. And, while there definitely is a difference between how French and American women approach life and love, what this book doesn't address is that there's a difference between how French and American *men* approach life and love as well...while some (or even most, I would agree) of the author's suggestions certainly mirror my own attitude toward life and relationships, unfortunately, she doesn't take into account that what works in French society and in French relationships does not necessarily translate when dealing with American relationships (more's the pity, since I'm more of the French mindset myself!). I'd say if you want to read this book, get it from the library and save the money...at the very least, read the other books written on the topic. (One that wasn't mentioned that explores both the male and female perspective is "Women and Men: A Philosophical Conversation," by Francoise Giroud and Bernard-Henri Levy.)
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20 of 24 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars
Review From A Professional Matchmaker, August 30, 2010
This review is from: French Women Don't Sleep Alone (Paperback)
As someone who reads a good deal on the topics of dating, love and relationships and who hears more than an earful from both men and women on this subject each day, I do not think "French Women Don't Sleep Alone" is a valuable read to women seeking to improve the quality of their love lives/relationships and, thus, I would not recommend it.
Unfortunately, there is very little substance in "French Women Don't Sleep Alone" - rather, it is in essence one woman's idealization of the French culture. If one were to read this book without any other knowledge on the topic, one would think that French women are all perfect specimens of beauty and all masters at the art of love with absolutely no issues to wrestle with when it comes to dating/relationships - it is this type of extreme bias that makes the book lose credibility (as one other reviewer commented here - the prevalence of mistresses/adultery in the French culture demonstrates that perhaps French women don't have it all down as the author suggests). The book's attempts to be cute and whimsical generally fell flat for me and I could not agree more with the reviewer who wrote that if she wanted a cookbook, she would have bought one. The recipes add nothing to the book - perhaps Ms. Callan thought they would be cute and helpful but it was almost irritating to come across - recommending some excellent cookbooks would have added more value to the reader. Likewise, her heavy emphasis on the single woman's need to throw dinner parties is also misguided for a good portion of the population considering that in urban areas most single females who live in apartments do not have the space to entertain the way Ms. Callan suggests.
To be fair, the book does offer a few helpful suggestions. I agree whole heartedly with Ms. Callan's observations on the elegant/tasteful dressing tips to be taken from French women. And I also agree with her commentary on how French women tend to let men be men more than American women do (and so I agree with her advice to celebrate the differences between the sexes). As there is limited value in the book (VERY limited), I give it one star.
Simply put, there are so many other books on this subject that are more interesting, more informative and a far better use of a reader's time.
Marni Galison, President and Founder
Sunday at Noon Matchmaking and Events
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