A Friend Like Henry: The Remarkable True Story of an Autistic Boy and the Dog That Unlocked His World [Paperback]

Nuala Gardner (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: September 1, 2008

"The incredible story of a family with an autistic son, Dale, who conquers his disability thanks to the special bond he forms with Henry, a golden retriever puppy ... This is a fascinating and inspiring real-life account."
- Woman & Home

a friend like henry
The remarkable true story of an autistic boy and the dog that unlocked his world
When Jamie and Nuala Gardner chose a puppy for their son, Dale, they weren't an ordinary family choosing an ordinary pet. Dale's autism was so severe that the smallest deviation from his routine could provoke a terrifying tantrum. Family life was almost destroyed by his condition, and his parents spent most of their waking hours trying to break into their son's autistic world and give him the help he so desperately needed. But after years of constant effort and slow progress, the Gardners' lives were transformed when they welcomed a new member into the family, Henry, a gorgeous golden retriever puppy. The bond between Dale and his dog would change their lives ...

"This touching story is an emotional rollercoaster."
- Book Review

"Emotionally charged, this is a story that raises powerful issues in a deeply personal and insightful manner."
- Irish Examiner

Editorial Reviews

Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.

By the time we took Dale up to his room to settle him for the night, he was much calmer, although he insisted that Henry stay with him at all times. Even when Henry was lying beside him on top of the blanket, Dale still needed reassurance that his dog was not going away and was feeling all right. I had an idea and whispered to Jamie, who then said in Henry's deep voice, "Dale, I'm feeling much better now. Please take my Band-aid off."

Jamie gently removed the Band-aid, saying, "Dale, I'll put this in the trash-we won't need it any more."

Dale's face immediately flooded with relief and Jamie left me to say goodnight to him.

"Dale, give Henry his night-time kiss," I told him. "It's time to sleep."

He turned and did so, saying, "Night, night, Henry. Love you. See you in the morning."

I tucked Dale in and kissed him, saying, "Goodnight, Dale," as I cautiously turned to leave.
Then came his quiet, upset little voice, wanting more reassurance: "Mummy, Dale loves his dog."

I didn't want to make any more of a fuss and carried on, saying, "Yes, darling, and Henry loves Dale."

As I opened the bedroom door wider, Dale repeated softly, "Mummy, Dale loves his dog."

"Yes, that's good," I replied, still trying to leave. Then I stopped dead in my tracks as his next words hit me.

"And Dale loves his mummy."

Just five little words, yet I was numb, paralyzed with shock. Then somehow my brain started to function again, although my heart was pounding-I desperately didn't want to get this wrong. I turned around and knelt down beside Dale's bed, where I gave him a cautious and gentle hug, telling him, "Mummy loves you, too. And Daddy loves you. Goodnight, Dale."

His sweet, small voice replied, "And Dale loves Daddy."

I kissed him on the head, quietly left the room and wept-copious, silent tears. Through this mist I noticed Jamie, who had been waiting on the landing to see whether Dale had settled. We just gazed at each other, disbelieving. Then he took me in his arms as I continued to weep.

Product Details

• Paperback: 272 pages
• Publisher: Sourcebooks, Inc. (September 1, 2008)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1402214065
• ISBN-13: 978-1402214066
• Product Dimensions: 7.9 x 5.2 x 0.8 inches
• Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (23 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #434,886 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

9 of 9 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Profoundly Moving, October 15, 2008

By 

A. Riley (USA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: A Friend Like Henry: The Remarkable True Story of an Autistic Boy and the Dog That Unlocked His World (Paperback)

I kind of feel like I don't even know where to start talking about this book. I knew very little about what families with autistic children go through, and after reading this book, a first hand account of a mother with two autistic children, I feel I can empathize much more with the struggle they go through. And while all the daily tasks and events, the simple communications and learning events most parents take for granted are extraordinarily more difficult, this book is in no way a downer.

First of all, I think the Gardners are fantastic parents. They worked tirelessly to help their son live the most normal life he possibly could. After years of working with him and using his obsessions (such as with Mickey Mouse and Thomas the Tank Engine) to teach him about human emotions and connecting with other people to minimal results, they discovered he loved dogs. And so they researched and searched until they were able to find a golden retriever puppy...the breed they thought would be a perfect fit.

A wonderful testament to the glory of dogs, this dog loved their son and became a companion to him and helped this family "get their son back."

This book is the story of a life...of Jamie and Nuala's life, of Dale's life, and of Henry's life. It's about struggle and triumph...parental love and the love of a dog. It's profoundly moving, inspiring, and educational. I highly, highly recommend it. Just be sure to have a box of tissues nearby when you read....you'll need it.

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Honest, blunt, rewarding, October 31, 2008

By 

DJ Kirkby (Hampshire, England) - See all my reviews

This review is from: A Friend Like Henry: The Remarkable True Story of an Autistic Boy and the Dog That Unlocked His World (Paperback)

a friend like henry,written by Nuala Gardner and published by Sourcebooks is a parents' book about autism...with all the fluffy bits removed. Honest, blunt, significant, rewarding. A well written, meaningful and very readable book.

a friend like henry is a book that tells the reader how frustrating, enlightening and magical living with autism can be, both for the person on the spectrum and those that live in the world parallel to ours.
I am happy to say that at no time in this book is it ever implied that Dale should be 'cured' of his autism, it is obvious throughout the book that the search is for coping mechanisms and behavioral modification.

One of the things I enjoyed most was that Nuala does not claim that pet therapy is the only solution to the above dilemma but she does openly and honestly share one way of using an autistic child's obsession to their family's best advantage.

One of the things I disliked the most about this book (besides the use of all lower case for the title and author name), was the way it rewired all my emotions and made me cry every few pages. I found that I had to pace myself through this book by reading it in between several others in order to give my emotions a break. I nearly couldn't continue on reading it at the end but I am not going to tell you why, as it will 'ruin' the ending for you. However, I am happy that I did carry on.

After reading this book I am still convinced that our N3S is still the child most likely to be savaged by a dog but I picked up a few tips encouraging on behavioral modification which we will apply through other mediums.

The section where Dale 'speaks' at the end of the book along with Nuala's afterword are nice twists and are the perfect ending to what I feel is a triumph of literary honesty. This is a very special book.

I speak as both an adult Aspie and a mother of an Aspie child when I say that this book will break your heart into several pieces and then show you interesting new ways to put it back together again.

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Dog is One's Best Friend, January 25, 2011

By 

BeatleBangs1964 (United States) - See all my reviews
(TOP 1000 REVIEWER)    (VINE VOICE)   

This review is from: A Friend Like Henry: The Remarkable True Story of an Autistic Boy and the Dog That Unlocked His World (Paperback)

On February 18, 1994 the Gardners made a fateful decision. They decided to go ahead and get a therapy dog, ostensibly a pet for their son Dale, who, then 5 had autism. Dale at that time was marginally verbal and devoted to his stuffed Mickey Mouse, Thomas the Tank and to following routines.

The dog, whom Dale named Henry after a character who was featured with Thomas the Tank would prove invaluable. He learned alongside with Henry. When Henry was being housebroken and rewarded with a treat each time he used the great outdoors, Nuala used this as a teaching moment for Dale. Dale, then 5 became fully toilet trained after seeing Henry master this skill. His drawing skills also improved. Shortly after Henry arrived, Dale drew a recognizable picture of a dog labelled "Henry." It was the first representational drawing he had made.

Nuala and Jamie Gardner would "talk" through the dog to teach Dale and communicate with him. They would pretend to "be" the dog and speak as if the dog were, as in "I love it when Dale plays with me," and "I wish Dale would share his blanket with me." In time, this method paid dividends. Dale's behavior became less autistic and by the time he was 7, was able to tolerate a birthday party. He was also able to accept seeing familiar objects in different settings, such as a tire being used as a swing. He had fewer meltdowns and ordinary words such as "okay," "proud" and "school" no longer sent him into a frenzy. By 2000, he was promoted to the local public school in his Scottish town.

Thanks to Henry, Dale's world expanded. He got to go to Disneyland for his 8th birthday in 1996. He almost got to move to Austin, TX when Jamie was exploring a job possibility at the well-known technology firm, AMD (American Micro Device).

In February of 2000, Dale, then nearly 12 became a brother. His sister Amy developed normally, but began displaying autistic tendencies within her first year. Since Henry was by then becoming elderly (he was 6 when Amy was born), a therapy dog was specially purchased for her. She named him Henry as a nod to Dale's wonderful dog. Her autistic behaviors were very different from those of her brother. She developed special interests and could stay focussed on them for interminably long periods.

Sadly, Henry died in April 2006 at the age of 12 (almost 13), but the legacy of his healing work will always live. Dale wrote an excellent postscript to this book and included a beautiful drawing of Henry.

Cowboy & Wills: A Love Story is another excellent book about how a boy with autism was moved off the spectrum with the help of his beloved dog. The Horse Boy: A Father's Quest to Heal His Son is yet another stellar book about how animals reached a child with autism.