Funny Quotes: The Best of Unintentional Humor [Paperback]

Drew Peacock (Author)

Out of Print--Limited Availability.

Book Description

Publication Date: September 26, 2005

You know it: someone wants to say something, but once said, it takes a whole different meaning. Like this church bulletin during the minister's illness: "God is good. Dr. Hargreaves is better." Or this ad on a billboard: "Tired of the same old diet plans that don't work? Try this one!" Or this doctor's comment on a patient chart: "The patient has been depressed ever since she began seeing me in 1993." Funny Quotes is an extensive collection of the best of unintentional humor. It features quotes from resumes and cover letters ("My experience in horticulture is well-rooted."), employee efficiency reports ("This employee should go far - and the sooner he starts, the better we'll be."), insurance claims ("I saw a slow moving, sad faced old gentleman as he bounced off the roof of my car."). Other quotes come from courts, restaurants, newspapers, tourists, kids, school absence excuses, etc., you name it... The bonus section has some of the best verbal blunders from famous people like George W. Bush (bushisms), Samuel Goldwyn or Murray Walker.

#outer_postBodyPS { display: none; } #psGradient { display: none; } #psPlaceHolder { display: none; } #psExpand { display: none; } You know it: someone wants to say something, but once said, it takes a whole different meaning. Like this church bulletin during the minister's illness: "God is good. Dr. Hargreaves is better." Or this ad on a billboard: "Tired of the same old diet plans that don't work? Try this one!" Or this doctor's comment on a patient chart: "The patient has been depressed ever since she began seeing me in 1993." Funny Quotes is an extensive collection of the best of unintentional humor. It features quotes from resumes and cover letters ("My experience in horticulture is well-rooted."), employee efficiency reports ("This employee should go far - and the sooner he starts, the better we'll be."), insurance claims ("I saw a slow moving, sad faced old gentleman as he bounced off the roof of my car."). Other quotes come from courts, restaurants, newspapers, tourists, kids, school absence excuses, etc., you name it... The bonus section has some of the best verbal blunders from famous people like George W. Bush (bushisms), Samuel Goldwyn or Murray Walker.

Product Details

Paperback: 158 pages
Publisher: Harvard Academia Publishing (September 26, 2005)
ISBN-10: 0973923903
ISBN-13: 978-0973923902
Product Dimensions: 7.8 x 5.2 x 0.5 inches
Shipping Weight: 7.2 ounces
Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #5,309,659 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Front Cover | Table of Contents | First Pages | Back Cover | Surprise Me!

Inside This Book (learn more)

First Sentence:
"Experience: Watered, groomed, and fed the family dog for years." Read the first page

Key Phrases - Statistically Improbable Phrases (SIPs): (learn more)
leaving last job, absent yesterday, tourism web site

Key Phrases - Capitalized Phrases (CAPs): (learn more)
Hong Kong, New Zealand, United States, Chinese Restaurant, New York, Gerald Ford, British Columbia, Queen Victoria, Visitor Information Centre, Pedicab Driver, The Kung Fu Cult Master

New!
Concordance | Text Stats

Browse Sample Pages:
Front Cover | Table of Contents | First Pages | Back Cover | Surprise Me!

Citations (learn more)

This book cites 10 books:

The Origin Of Species: 150th Anniversary Edition by Charles Darwin on page 152
Earth in the Balance: Ecology and the Human Spirit by Albert Gore on page 138
On the Origin of Species (Penguin Classics) by Charles Darwin on page 152
Slow Waltz in Cedar Bend by Robert James Waller on page 86
The First Commandment by A. L. David on page 109

See all 10 books this book cites

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