After more than two decades as a psychotherapist, relationship counselor and author (Finding True Love, etc.), Kingma suggests turning away from issues of the personality to those of the soul in loving relationships. She spends a lot of time criticizing "traditional" marriage ("suffocates the individual vivid soul") and the nuclear family ("intense focus and neurosis"), but she eventually does include them among the many possibilities of "soulful relationships." While her overall message of acceptance for, and celebration of, the many varieties of love seems perfectly sound, it's questionable whether a majority of American adults today would view "multiple-person relationships, relationships that defy age or gender boundaries, or embody astonishing emotional or spiritual acrobatics" as "failures or aberrations." Kingma offers comfort for the occasional pangs of concern over not having fulfilled the myth of get-married-and-live-happily-ever-after, but her discussions of "relaxing boundaries" and forgiveness could be problematic for those facing issues of addiction or abuse. Her implication that changing the "forms" of relationships makes them "illumined" is debatable, moreover. Her most valuable contribution here seems to be her discussion of the "ten qualities of a soulful relationship": self-awareness, aliveness, realism, honesty, generosity, empathy, forgiveness, thanksgiving, consecration and joy. As she wisely makes clear, these soulful attributes can be present, or not, in myriad forms of relationship.
Copyright 1998 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to the Hardcover edition.
"Daphne Rose Kingma is one of the Knowers on the planet, one of the women who see things, and pass on the information. With this book, I hope her information reaches even further and wider, past our personalities, past our barriers, past our resistances to love. She takes our hands and guides us past the war zones of relationships to the peaceful meadows of a higher love."
--Marianne Williamson, author of A Return to Love
"In this innovative book, Daphne Rose Kingma breaks down the popular myth of how love is 'supposed' to be by introducing us to a broad spectrum of intimate connections. She reveals how to work through the various confrontations that every relationship encounters and reach deeper levels of love and intimacy."
--John Gray, author of Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus
From the Hardcover edition.
Not very helpful or,deep,enough . Most things mentioned were obvious .Published 5 months ago by eve
This will completely change your view and experience of love! It's such a ground-breaking book! And it has such a poetic, soothing voice! Read morePublished 14 months ago by Kundan Chhabra
This is a great book. I have shared it with others and everyone finds it insightful and valuable. I would highly recommend it.Published 19 months ago by Fay Otto
I thought the book was very repetitive, and I could hardly wait to be finished with it.
However, it did provide food for thought within my own marriage relationship.
This is an excellent book for anyone exploring non-concensus ways of Being in relationships, and for anyone who is on their Soul Path & following their heart.Published on December 19, 2012 by Chehale
This book has amazing insight into love & relationships. It really helped me expand my perception of love & become more of a realist. Read morePublished on January 31, 2011 by IrieViz
This book is such a beacon of light for the future of relationships. I was inspired, touched and delighted with every idea and vision the author shares. Read morePublished on May 17, 2009 by A. Kesler
Since I was young I have had many non-traditional relationships. I picked this book up because the way Kingma writes speaks to my soul. Read morePublished on November 24, 2007 by R. Fairchild