In the Garden of Our Dreams: Memoirs of a Marriage [Hardcover]

Shirlee Taylor Haizlip (Author), Harold C. Haizlip (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: October 1998

Shirlee Taylor Haizlip, bestselling author of The Sweeter the Juice, and her husband, Harold C. Haizlip, describe, with unwavering commitment to each other, their families, and their race, what hard work, good luck, and most important, unshakable love can accomplish. Told in their alternating voices, In the Garden of Our Dreams is a portrait of their nearly forty-year love affair. Born into a generation reared in segregation, Harold, the Southerner, and Shirlee, the Northerner, strove not only to marry their individual differences in reaching for common happiness, but also joined the larger struggle of their generation to achieve integration and racial equality. In this intimate and moving memoir, the couple reflects on how they defined themselves as African Americans during some of the most important years in America's struggle with issues of race, class, and equality. Uplifting and romantic, In the Garden of Our Dreams gives all couples hope in this time of increasing cynicism about the value of marriage and the effect each individual can have in the larger struggle against society's ills.

Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

She was an African American princess, raised in a racially mixed Connecticut neighborhood and taught by her father "to go after whatever I thought I could do." He came from a poor section of Washington, D.C., and supported his brilliant academic career with scholarships and part-time jobs. But when they met in 1957, their shared aspirations to "uplift the race" and force white America to accept them on their own terms drew them together. Married in 1959, the Haizlips held various socially conscious jobs while experiencing the tumult of the 1960s from an unusual vantage point; when Martin Luther King Jr. was assassinated, Shirlee Haizlip notes, "I stopped wearing white gloves." They lived in a privileged, integrated world but never wavered in their commitment to help less fortunate black people. And their joint memoir sketches the evolution of both a marriage between very different personalities and the racial landscape in America. Pungent political awareness leavens the sentimentality of the couple's family portrait, and alternating first-person narratives give the story a "he said, she said" completeness, doing justice to two powerful individuals who quarreled but maintained an unshakeable bond. --Wendy Smith

From Library Journal

Shirlee Taylor Haizlip, author of The Sweeter the Juice (LJ 1/94), a family memoir about her family's mixed racial heritage, and Harold Haizlip, an educator and administrator, have written the story of their marriage. Engaging as a love story, it is also intellectually satisfying as a social history of the Fifties to the Nineties. The Haizlips met on a blind date at Harvard and enjoyed the early years of their marriage in style as part of the arty New York scene, but they arrived in the Eighties unemployed with two daughters. Fierce determination, resourcefulness, and belief in each other bring them to easier times by the book's end. Following them from New York to the Virgin Islands to New Haven to Los Angeles, we hear the story of their life passages and goals from both points of view?they take turns telling it. Marriage memoirs are rare; Madeleine L'Engle's Two-Part Invention (LJ 11/15/88) comes to mind, but it is written in just one voice. Inspiring in this age of divorce, and highly recommended for all libraries.?Barbara O'Hara, Free Lib. of Philadelphia
Copyright 1998 Reed Business Information, Inc.

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Product Details

• Hardcover: 306 pages
• Publisher: Kodansha Amer Inc; 1st ed edition (October 1998)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1568362544
• ISBN-13: 978-1568362540
• Product Dimensions: 9.3 x 6.2 x 1.3 inches
• Shipping Weight: 1.5 pounds
• Average Customer Review: 4.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (10 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,816,695 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Love and commitment transcend tribulations, September 6, 1999

By A Customer

This review is from: In the Garden of Our Dreams: Memoirs of a Marriage (Hardcover)

The Haizlips have written a lyrical memoir of their forty year marriage, demonstrating over and over that love and commitment are the foundation of a lasting relationship. Despite the challenges that they encountered, this steadfast foundation never waivered. The previous reviewer somehow missed the most poignant message of their story. Racism is the ever present snake in the garden. As recounted in Shirlee's first book, The Sweeter the Juice, the issue of color and race in America is a powerful destroyer of families. However, Shirlee and Harold have managed not to succomb to the bitterness that bigotry and hatred can breed, but have built a life together and contributed to the greater good of sociey, reflecting their love for each other. I was awed by their story and felt priveleged to read it. My life is richer for having read this work, but even more so for having had the pleasure of calling them my friends.

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars An enjoyable read., March 20, 2000

By A Customer

This review is from: In the Garden of Our Dreams: Memoirs of Our Marriage (Paperback)

I enjoyed this book immensely. I previously believed that the Taylor/Haizlip story was somewhat snobby, with two daughters who went to Yale, and the big beautiful houses they lived in, yadda yadda yadda, but in reading this book, I realized that this was not the case. They have struggled and perservered. I especially enjoyed Harold's story and "getting to know him". I sort of knew Shirlee's story since I read The Sweeter the Juice, and it was really nice to read of how they fell in love, and most importantly, how they've remained in love along with their other trials and tribulations. This book definitely has it all. I was pleased to actually have something that I actually wanted to read on the train to and from work. I also must say that the segments outlining Shirlee's driving adventures had me laughing out loud, too! I highly recommend this book, and wish it didn't end.

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars This memoir was exciting and inspiring, hard to put down., August 9, 1999

By A Customer

This review is from: In the Garden of Our Dreams: Memoirs of a Marriage (Hardcover)

I enjoyed Shirlee Taylor Haizlip's first book, "The Sweeter the Juice," so much I could not wait to read "In the Garden of Our Dreams." I chose it as the number one book on my summer reading list. I was not disappointed. I could hardly put it down. My family teased me because I was so enthralled with the book I tried to stand at the stove and cook and read it simultaneously. Needless to say their meals suffered somewhat. I thoroughly enjoyed this book because it showed a couple really committed to their marriage vows. They loved and supported each other through thick and thin, good times and bad times. Harold has stayed in love with his wife for forty years and has always remained faithful to her. Shirlee kept loving her husband and believing in him even when his jobs did not always work out. She always thought about what was best for her husband and the children when she made decisions. I enjoyed seeing their commitment to each other. They did not paint themselves as perfect to the reader either. They honestly admitted their faults and shortcomings. They had their share of problems with job changes, raising their daughters, dealing with their extended family, and having to deal with racism. But I admired how Shirlee and Harold could communiate with each other and talk things through. Harold seemed to really listen to his wife and respect her opinion. Being the daughter of a prominent Baptist minister, Shirlee relied on her faith throughout the years to to get her through the hard times. It was a good lesson for me to see her strength and grace in facing challenges. It did not matter to me that they were well educated, were upper middle class, and were part of the so-called "black bourgeois." What really captivated me was the committed love they had for each other, their family and friends. I will cherish this book and let it serve as an inspiration and guide to me in my marriage.