As a parent of a child with Asperger's Syndrome, I try to read whatever I can about living with Asperger's as a family and communicating with the world in which we live. I appreciate the voice of other parents with kids on the Autism Spectrum for their unique perspective and the candid moments they share which only another parent raising a child on the spectrum could possibly understand. I find the how-to and self-help books on Asperger's that are written by people who only see their little blip on the spectrum and cannot broaden their horizons to include the reader in the journey to be entirely too preachy, unrealistic, and I lose interest.
The author of "Get Out, Explore, and Have Fun" initially lost me as in the preface she speaks about her son with PDD-NOS but then, in the preface and the beginning of the book, alienates the reader by making gross generalizations and making negative "however" remarks about specific educational programs and therapies, some of which seem to be based on her one experience rather than research or even talking to parents who have tried them with their kids or the professionals that conduct the various programs. Lisa Jo Rudy is rather gung ho, in the very beginning of the book, about not coddling one's autistic child and seems to favor shoving the autistic child straight out of the nest and the results will be a beneficial learning experience no matter what. It reads, to me, as though she has not had any experience with children with autism and their families, which I know is not the case, so I'm surprised that I came away with this feeling, just in the opening pages of her book.
I think this book suffers from what I consider to be "The Secret" syndrome- think positive and everything will be positive. The reality, is that with a kid with autism, many parents find that "expect the best but prepare for the worst" is the norm, and frankly, my son with Asperger's doesn't cramp my style and we don't hold him back from experiences, but we do make an effort to modulate where needed so that he can get the most out of a specific experience. In the preface and the early chapters, the author seems to advocate for immersion and maybe her child and her experience is not with individuals with sensory challenges.
Don't get me wrong, I am all for kids (regardless of their wiring) having fun and experiencing the world, but as a parent of a child who spent the first month of preschool washing his hands compulsively because the water and the action dampened the sound and movement that was overwhelming in the new environment, I have learned that it is important for our kids to have all of the recreational and life experiences possible, but if you throw them right in and say that they will be stronger because they will learn from the negative interactions and adapt to the negative environmental cues, then you are ignoring the reality that is life with autism, asperger's, and sensory issues. If my kid could get past the sensory stuff just by being in the mix, then I probably wouldn't be reading every book and article on the subject and working with him on a daily basis so that he can tackle the world.
What this book does right, though it almost lost me before we got there, is that it offers various recreational groups suggestions on how to accommodate a child with autism, and the positives of the child with autism, while getting rid of any fears they may have about including a child who is not neurotypical in their programs. Lisa Jo Rudy's professional experience is in this particular area and here is where she shines. The lecture-y, singular perspective of the beginning of the book almost fades from memory as she shoes ways that kids may need help participating, and encourages parents to pursue inclusion and gives them the tools to advocate for their children in an area that isn't often covered with any depth in other publications (though physical disabilities are often covered, neurobiological differences are often "invisible" to the casual observer, and that makes dealing with the public, and often family and friends, and participating in the whole world a challenge, and quite exhausting). I love that she presents lists and ways to address concerns (the facility's and our own, as parents) and mentions some alternate programs that parents may not be aware of at more traditional recreational outlets (like special needs swim classes at the Y).
I will keep this book on my reference shelf, as the tips, suggestions, and parental empowerment (once you get past the beginning) are quite good jumping off points for pursuing a more active experience, in the community, for the family.
On a personal note, I have Asperger's as well, and I was only diagnosed shortly after my son was (the apple doesn't fall far from the tree apparently!). I am 34. I think I take issue with the idea of dropping a kid with AS/ASD into a mainstream program as preferential over a program where their needs are considered so they can adapt and grow, because I was the kid dropped into programs and dealing with bullies, and my own shortcomings (I'm a thorough researcher and an excellent metalsmith, but anything sports related is not my forte, and thankfully at 34 I can laugh at it, but at 4-18 the criticism from peers and adults was devastating and paralyzing. My belief in raising my son is the old adage about learning to walk before you can run. There are not breaks from things being a therapeutic experience in raising my child, as everything is a learning and therapeutic experience, but that doesn't make it exhausting and boring and dreadful for the child or for us. I also think that throwing caution to the wind and putting a child with sensory and communication and neurological differences overall in a situation where their challenges are going to eclipse any benefit, without appropriate support (which includes therapy, assistance, practice, social skills/stories, etc) can do serious damage. I do appreciate that this book then covered the aides, assistance, etc... but the beginning definitely sounded like some of the tripe we have to deal with from family members who don't bother to read the literature or even listen to our stories (ie "he needs to socialize more and he'll be fine"...Put my kid in a room of 100 kids his age and most of them will eventually communicate with another kid in some way. My kid will be taking apart the water fountain to inspect the plumbing.)
