Customer Reviews

Get Out, Explore, and Have Fun!: How Families of Children With Autism or Asperger Syndrome Can Get the Most Out of Community Activities

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A little background is in order. I have a 10 yr old son with Autism. He was born with a chromosomal deletion (8p23.1) that can cause severe behavioral issues. He also has some physical challenges. In the beginning we were too busy, bluntly, keeping him alive to worry about getting out--in fact the first two years we were on quarantine keeping him in to keep germs and sickness out. Then when we were medically out of the woods more his behaviors became so challenging we (like the author of this book) had him kicked out of every preschool he attended. By age 5 he was in a lock down psych ward -- and we were being told he would need to be institutionalized for the remainder of his life. They gave him so many labels we couldn't keep them straight. We had people in and out of our lives constantly -- leaving us with no privacy, no sense of family, and little sense of hope. Enter a nurse from the ward who took me aside and told me she thought my son might be autistic (not bipolar, ADHD, depressed, or any other of the things all the Doctor's wanted to dx him with) and encouraged us to take him to the regional center for evaluation. Turns out that was correct and we finally turned the corner.

I say this because if this book can be applied to my situation, where my sons history included behaviors like severe perseveration, violence, and limited food choices (amongst many other things), it can apply to nearly anybody's situation with an autistic kid. Really.

The author starts by addressing many of the common issues/thoughts/ideas that come up when you are the parent of an autistic kid. From ignorance to fear to guilt it's covered. For me and my family most of our thought centers on behavior -- how will my son behave? What will they think of me in light of his behavior? The author not only deals with this issue but promptly states that there will be times when things don't go well. Toughen up mom. Keep trying. That's a message that is good for me to hear. It is all too easy to sit in the apartment and handle my son doing things he likes to do and take a break from the world. She does not come across as preachy either.

I very much appreciated the author's guilt free way to get this across. I don't know how other parents feel but I feel guilty. Since my son was little just getting through the day was a major challenge. As he got older and his behaviors a bit better we ventured out a little but even a trip to Target is fraught with problems - he could run (he's an escape artist) or push someone or just melt down. Taking him anywhere is just so challenging that the effort hardly seems worth it. Yet I would like to give him some of the same opportunities other kids have. Let's not even speak about the way this affects his NT (normal) sister who, like the authors daughter, is very close to her brother.

In Get Out, Explore, and Have Fun! the author provides fairly detailed information about many types of outings. Sports, museums, performing arts, social clubs, camps, and more. Each chapter provides a really well done encapsulation of the type of outing, challenges, resources, who it might be appropriate for and some real world family stories (often her own) as well as all sorts of hints and tips. She includes a couple of chapters for how to present inclusion to the groups or outing locations including sample proposals. There is also a resource section in the back.

For those of you who understand acronyms like ABA, RDI, etc she used Greenspan's floortime with her son and she also mentions Garnder's multiple intelligences and Gray's social stories. These will all be familiar things if you have done any amount of research into Autism and Aspergers.

So what's my plan? My daughter is very into drama and theatre. Since my son loves TV and movies I decided that this would be the chapter we would work on first (my son hates sports and is not very good at them and really struggles with making friends). After going through the chapter we (my daughter and I) decided we will go to a play. The author mentions you can be a participant or an observer. We'll start with observation. We're very excited and I feel better prepared for this to be successful yet grounded in a realism that not everything is going to work.

The next outing will be natural world. We live near a canyon and that should be a great place to start exploring. My son hates sand so even though we are by the ocean we seldom venture that way. I do wish the author had included more about the natural world outside of camp though. Much of the info in that chapter is camp related but we have a wide variety of options locally that are not camp's like horseback riding, ranches, pretend digs, local lake's, etc. Some of these things are not only natural world though so I'll use the other chapters to assist.

And that's the point. Whether or not we are successful we tried. I think that is the overall message in this book. Jessica Kingsley publisher is, in my opinion, the top Autism and Aspergers book company. This book is just as excellent as their others. In a world where so many of the resources on ASD kids centers on the TYPE of therapy you should do (including pro's and con's) we really needed a great book like this written at a parent's level. It's realistic, easy to read and reference, and comes at the topic from a practical bent. It is absolutely worth your time to pick up for your reference library. Do yourself a favor though and make sure it is prominently featured so you'll be encouraged to use it frequently!

As a parent of a child with Asperger's Syndrome, I try to read whatever I can about living with Asperger's as a family and communicating with the world in which we live. I appreciate the voice of other parents with kids on the Autism Spectrum for their unique perspective and the candid moments they share which only another parent raising a child on the spectrum could possibly understand. I find the how-to and self-help books on Asperger's that are written by people who only see their little blip on the spectrum and cannot broaden their horizons to include the reader in the journey to be entirely too preachy, unrealistic, and I lose interest.

The author of "Get Out, Explore, and Have Fun" initially lost me as in the preface she speaks about her son with PDD-NOS but then, in the preface and the beginning of the book, alienates the reader by making gross generalizations and making negative "however" remarks about specific educational programs and therapies, some of which seem to be based on her one experience rather than research or even talking to parents who have tried them with their kids or the professionals that conduct the various programs. Lisa Jo Rudy is rather gung ho, in the very beginning of the book, about not coddling one's autistic child and seems to favor shoving the autistic child straight out of the nest and the results will be a beneficial learning experience no matter what. It reads, to me, as though she has not had any experience with children with autism and their families, which I know is not the case, so I'm surprised that I came away with this feeling, just in the opening pages of her book.

I think this book suffers from what I consider to be "The Secret" syndrome- think positive and everything will be positive. The reality, is that with a kid with autism, many parents find that "expect the best but prepare for the worst" is the norm, and frankly, my son with Asperger's doesn't cramp my style and we don't hold him back from experiences, but we do make an effort to modulate where needed so that he can get the most out of a specific experience. In the preface and the early chapters, the author seems to advocate for immersion and maybe her child and her experience is not with individuals with sensory challenges.

Don't get me wrong, I am all for kids (regardless of their wiring) having fun and experiencing the world, but as a parent of a child who spent the first month of preschool washing his hands compulsively because the water and the action dampened the sound and movement that was overwhelming in the new environment, I have learned that it is important for our kids to have all of the recreational and life experiences possible, but if you throw them right in and say that they will be stronger because they will learn from the negative interactions and adapt to the negative environmental cues, then you are ignoring the reality that is life with autism, asperger's, and sensory issues. If my kid could get past the sensory stuff just by being in the mix, then I probably wouldn't be reading every book and article on the subject and working with him on a daily basis so that he can tackle the world.

What this book does right, though it almost lost me before we got there, is that it offers various recreational groups suggestions on how to accommodate a child with autism, and the positives of the child with autism, while getting rid of any fears they may have about including a child who is not neurotypical in their programs. Lisa Jo Rudy's professional experience is in this particular area and here is where she shines. The lecture-y, singular perspective of the beginning of the book almost fades from memory as she shoes ways that kids may need help participating, and encourages parents to pursue inclusion and gives them the tools to advocate for their children in an area that isn't often covered with any depth in other publications (though physical disabilities are often covered, neurobiological differences are often "invisible" to the casual observer, and that makes dealing with the public, and often family and friends, and participating in the whole world a challenge, and quite exhausting). I love that she presents lists and ways to address concerns (the facility's and our own, as parents) and mentions some alternate programs that parents may not be aware of at more traditional recreational outlets (like special needs swim classes at the Y).

I will keep this book on my reference shelf, as the tips, suggestions, and parental empowerment (once you get past the beginning) are quite good jumping off points for pursuing a more active experience, in the community, for the family.

On a personal note, I have Asperger's as well, and I was only diagnosed shortly after my son was (the apple doesn't fall far from the tree apparently!). I am 34. I think I take issue with the idea of dropping a kid with AS/ASD into a mainstream program as preferential over a program where their needs are considered so they can adapt and grow, because I was the kid dropped into programs and dealing with bullies, and my own shortcomings (I'm a thorough researcher and an excellent metalsmith, but anything sports related is not my forte, and thankfully at 34 I can laugh at it, but at 4-18 the criticism from peers and adults was devastating and paralyzing. My belief in raising my son is the old adage about learning to walk before you can run. There are not breaks from things being a therapeutic experience in raising my child, as everything is a learning and therapeutic experience, but that doesn't make it exhausting and boring and dreadful for the child or for us. I also think that throwing caution to the wind and putting a child with sensory and communication and neurological differences overall in a situation where their challenges are going to eclipse any benefit, without appropriate support (which includes therapy, assistance, practice, social skills/stories, etc) can do serious damage. I do appreciate that this book then covered the aides, assistance, etc... but the beginning definitely sounded like some of the tripe we have to deal with from family members who don't bother to read the literature or even listen to our stories (ie "he needs to socialize more and he'll be fine"...Put my kid in a room of 100 kids his age and most of them will eventually communicate with another kid in some way. My kid will be taking apart the water fountain to inspect the plumbing.)

I heartily recommend Lisa Rudy's new book, "Get Out, Explore and Have Fun" - and not just because I and my son are quoted in it (and I got a complimentary copy).

Let me give you a bit of background, so that you can understand why she doesn't just "talk the talk," but has also "walked the walk" of involving a child with autism in the community and in activities.

My son was a charter camper in Camp Outlook, the inclusion model adaptation of a typical YMCA camp modified for children with Asperger's Syndrome that she created and nurtured ([...]); it was his ESY program after kindergarten, and I learned of it through a parents' support group. That camp was the first time that we heard about what my son had done well during the day, rather than the bad things he had done - it was a truly a life changing experience for him and for us. (Full disclosure: partially as a result of his involvement in Camp Outlook, I was appointed to (and still hold a seat on) the Board of Directors of the YMCA of Philadelphia and Vicinity, and advocated for the expansion of the original camp to other branches.) In short, the advice in this book is based on real life success, not just ideas that sound good in theory.

The day I received my copy, a friend who is a case manager at a local wraparound agency (a group that provides in-home therapists to persons with autism) happened to be visiting us. When he saw the book, and its contents, he immediately saw how helpful it could be to his work (and that of the persons he supervises), and planned to order a copy immediately.

From my personal experience, I have tried to involve my son in as many experiences outside our home as possible, including Scouting, Challenger baseball and our church's religious education program (all mentioned in the book), as well as the YMCA Adventure Guides (which gave him the self confidence to speak about his activities of the prior month at each meeting when the "talking stick" came to him, with practice, of course). I have found that often the key to success has been learning how to accommodate his needs, so that he can get the desired benefit or enjoyment without potential pitfalls (and knowing what activities to avoid in the first place, such as soccer). For example, the Disney special needs pass (discussed in the book) was a critical way of making our visit to Disneyworld a success for our whole family, including our typical child. I think that this book provides a host of such ideas on ways to adapt activities to increase the chances of success for a child with autism, as well as helping parents, caregivers and service providers (like my friend) create ways to develop their own accommodations for situations not covered in the book.

In my advocacy in various contexts, such as religious education or adaptive sports, I have tried to provide a consistent message to parents of children with disabilities. Don't assume your child can't do something because of his or her autism - you may have to provide accommodations, be involved yourself as a leader to facilitate your child's participation, and plan the event intensively, but your child is capable of many great things. This book provides plenty of tools to make that effort easier.

I encourage parents to buy it not only as a checklist of possible outings, but also to reinforce their confidence in their own abilities to take their own child out into the world to have fun.

The release of this book was a timely one for my family. My daughter has PDD-NOS on the autistic spectrum, and her learning specialist at school had just told us that she was ready to start getting out into the community more, and that it would help greatly building her sense of accomplishment and confidence.

I was hesitant. We have been to a few places such as the zoo or the children's museum without incident but if something was slightly different, it had set off a tantrum of epic levels. After reading this book, I felt more at ease and ready to try again. It contains several activities that are more suited to an autistic child, including sports that are non-competitive and provide a way to help build muscle endurance and stamina which in turn can help with motor skill issues. She gives tip sheets that you can provide to the leader of the activity and suggestions for helping your child adjust to the new activity.

Most importantly, I love the attitude of the book, which is that you have to try. You may have to try a few things before you find the fit, and most importantly you have to participate at first too. Eventually you may be able to drop your child off, but for very social activities such as boy scouts, you will most likely have to heavily participate.

We have tried several things since reading the book including soccer, ice skating, and more trips to the playground. Soccer was a no go for now since the coordination needs some work on my daughter's part, but ice skating has worked wonders. After only 3 trips she is able to balance on her own for at least 10 minutes at a time and she is really enjoying it. Next we will be looking for a religious community using the tips in the book as I have missed that the most.

If you have a child on the spectrum and have felt ostracized because of it, this book is worth getting for help on finding new places for you and your child to enjoy.

If you are a parent or caregiver of a child with symptoms of Austism or Asperger Syndrome, this book is a great launching point. I strongly recommend it for ECEAP/HeadStart Family Libraries. The chapters are logical and written with multiple challenges in mind. For instance, a day at a zoo with a 5 year old has different challenges than it would be if the child were 17! Problem solving and potential alternatives are already thought out and well presented in easy to understand language. As teacher, I see how much enrichment this book can provide for kids that need to practice social skills in the real world without disastrous results from over stimulation. Check it out!

Lisa Jo Rudy is the [...] guide for Autism, and as such, she works hard at impartiality and inclusivity. I've previously asserted that this amounted to straddling the fence, and as such, was bound to irritate both those who think vaccines did it and those who don't. At Countering Age of Autism (my blog), I don't straddle that line of impartiality, wanting to provide factual and helpful information while not offending parents. I don't have to keep my opinions to myself and not choose a side and I'm not trying to be a central watering hole, so to speak. Rudy, on the other hand, manages a site that is a central water hole, and she does it well. On any given post, you will see comments from people who believe fervently in vaccines as a cause of autism discussing the post's contents alongside science-based, neurodiverse advocates. The exchanges can and do get heated, but by and large, areas of commonality can be revealed and discussed openly and freely.

I seriously underestimated Rudy and the level of tact and maneuvering it takes to create that kind of welcoming environment and of the importance of doing so. Not everything is two dimensional and the divide between parents is not nearly as stark as Huffington Post regular posters and Age of Autism would make you believe. This is something I've learned as I've stepped further away from the pugilistic enterprise that posting over at Huff on the autism-related threads is. It's also helped that I've communicated more over the last year with parents whose beliefs regarding their child's autism run the gamut and yet somehow, we've managed to fairly easily work together to try to advocate for others in need and to forge friendships, as well, based on the mutual desire to make the world a better place for our children. It's refreshing and heartwarming to realize that we have common interests that rise above the questions of causation.

I've come a long way from that us or them view. I think it's important to directly counter misinformation, but I don't think that should be the only thing or the main thing to engage in. Far more important is the question of how do we make the world more accepting, more appreciative of, and more accommodating for our children and others with disabilities?

Rudy indirectly addresses this question in her newly published book, Get Out, Explore, and Have Fun! Within the first twenty pages, I realized that here, too, was another person whose common interests and, more importantly, common experiences resonated with me. From the beginning, Rudy makes it clear that those divisions of causation and therapies won't be present in her book: it isn't about that. And what a relief to just have that all shoved aside as so much of the background noise that it really should be. Most of us, hopefully, don't spend all our time stuck in that morass, fighting out those battles. For all that Countering focuses on refuting misinformation regarding vaccines, autism, and various therapies, almost none of it spills over into my real world life with my children, which is focused on helping them navigate the wider world successfully.

Here , then, is a book that isn't going to wade through that mess of divisions, either. Instead, Rudy's book will focus on "getting out into the real world and participating in community activities." In the end, Rudy's right when she points out how important this is; this will matter far more for our children's future than any spittle-filled rant war at Huffington Post or any of the other places where such debates can be had between the diehards.

Rudy's first focal point is on the inadequacy of the school system to educate our children, how often the time with our children is wasted trying to achieve normalcy, and yet acknowledging the reality that the school system is hamstrung with the current legal requirements.

Schools, in general, are poorly equipped to foster curiosity and interest in typically developing children. For children with autism, school can be one long nightmare. Rudy points out that schools aren't set up to give kids, especially our children, the kind of learning environment that would best benefit them: "In fact, professional visitor-study organizations have reviewed, codified, and assessed the impact of hands-on, inquiry-based learning for children, teens, and families and found it to be extraordinarily valuable across the board." Unfortunately, that's not what most kids get: "Overall, students with autism have a very limited school life."

Rudy's book, then, is a guide to create that for our children outside of the school environment. With the schools' concerns focused on normalizing our children, our children are "unlikely to connect with like-minded individuals, build relationships based on common interests, or find opportunities to learn, grow, and lead in fields that interest them." We must do what we can to help foster our children's creativity, their areas of interest and help them forge relationships with like-minded individuals, and we can do this by getting out into the community.

Rudy details the ways in which community businesses' interest in catering to the needs of the autism population has changed as the prevalence (and awareness) of autism has increased, as well as the financial pressure many businesses face creating an incentive to draw in any customers. She notes, though, that many families continue to be reluctant to explore the wider world with their autistic children: many providers of daycare and kid-centered activities don't really display the tolerance towards special-needs children that they purport to; the mistaken assumption by parents that therapy should be nonstop, parental fears regarding "failure or embarrassment," "low expectations" of autistic children by adults, over-protectiveness by parents, lack of awareness by parents of the importance of" multisensory learning," autistic children's lack of interest in regular kid-centric activities, and a lack of information regarding available local resources.

The above reasons for keeping autistic children at home and uninvolved in the local community can all be mitigated. Information is a key way to get around many of these issues. Working with local businesses to foster acceptance and understanding is important. Making sure that unfriendly businesses know that the word will indeed get around regarding how unfriendly they are to the disabled is a powerful tool.

Parents need to be better informed regarding the need for balance; real world experiences are an important and absolutely vital component to helping our children fit into the wider world. If the goal is integration and acceptance into society, this cannot be done while hiding our children at home and immersing them in narrow therapies that do not translate to real world situations. We can find a way to balance the need to keep our children safe while letting them experience the wider world.

Rudy notes our children need a variety of experiences if we want to discover their potential talents and interests. She points out: "Besides--and this is very important--the fact that a child is "typically developing" does not mean he will be capable, kind, attentive, or self-aware. In other words, you needn't assume that your child's autism will make him more difficult or less competent than other children."

Chapter one closes with a list of practical tips that helps to set the stage for chapter two, which covers getting started on getting out and exploring. Preparation is key, as almost all of us parents of autistic children well know!

Rudy visits again the reasons for getting our children involved in the wider world. Yes, it absolutely takes more work, more thought, more effort to do this with our children, but it is a fundamentally important part of making them ready for their future. Rudy writes, "By involving your child--and yourself, by extension--in the ordinary world, you make it possible him to know what's expected

of him, not just by therapists, parents, and teachers but also by peers."

As parents contemplate this somewhat daunting idea of helping our children engage in the wider world, Rudy provides some suggestions: remembering that our children often walk the "fine line between interest and perseveration," that our children "may do things differently," that talking isn't always important, and as a mother of three on the spectrum, one I wholeheartedly echo: "a thick skin" is imperative.

Rudy provides a series of things for families to try: popular culture, the natural world, musical instruments, "marble mazes"--a very interesting idea, as well as sports. If your child doesn't seem to have regular kid interests, that's okay; Rudy suggests a number of things that relate to your child's particular special interest and activities that might interest them.

Once you're ready to get on out there, Rudy suggests some handy tools you'll need: "an intact sense of humor" (I've found a tendency to delight in the odd, the wacky and the absurd really helps), time, energy, patience, flexibility, and gasoline. Sometimes the things that most interest our children will require an investment of time and money to drive to the particular activity, event, or person who makes a connection with our children.

If your family is a blend of neurotypicality and neurodiverse, Rudy offers suggestions for siblings of autistic children, as well.

Chapter two, as will all the chapters in this delightful book, ends with a series of top tips. Chapter three focuses on the community and how to select the right opportunities for you and your children. Chapter four looks at various sporting events and activities, while chapter five picks up on various youth groups like the scouts, 4-H, and the YMCA. Chapter six looks at learning environments like museums, zoos and aquariums. Chapter seven explores faith-based options. Chapters eight through ten explore the performing arts, the natural world, and special interests and family outings. Each chapter is well-organized, filled with ideas and with solid tips for making these ideas a reality. Personal anecdotes are helpfully placed. This is not dry reading by any means. Rudy has a warm, friendly demeanor throughout the text, and readers will feel right at home with her as she leads them through an abundance of ideas. There really is something here for everyone.

The book closes with the concerns we as parents have for inclusion. It also, importantly, offers Rudy's own experience with accepting the need to stop for a minute, an hour, a day, or more, when things have just gotten to be too much. It's absolutely okay to take breaks from trying to take the world by storm, from trying to carve a place for our child in the wider world, and to take care of ourselves so that we can emerge refreshed and ready to wade back into the challenges of working for inclusion.

This is a book that any parent of autistic children will find entertaining and helpful. I highly recommend it.

This book is fairly well-researched, and the author offers many specific of how to deal with different concerns in different situations. I don't find this book really useful for my own situation... first of all my kids are not really on the disabling end of the spectrum, more just socially challenged and easily stressed. So I don't really have to prepare for events quite as thoroughly as this author suggests. Also since I tend to be similar my kids in some ways, we naturally are attracted to the same settings and situations.

I guess I don't really need a book about what works for my kids. This book would be a difficult topic to write about. Different people have different struggles and different preferences, even if they have the same diagnosis. Also many of the things the author suggests seem like they should be obvious to any parent of a child on the spectrum--yes, individual sports are perhaps preferable to team sports.

I do like the many photos of real-life kids involved in programs, accompanied by real success stories.

My reason for ordering this book was my sweet 6 yr old grandson, who had just been diagnosed with Asperger's. We had a trip to the local Children's Museum that became a disaster!

The ideas in this book have helped his parents and us to understand what he can handle and what he can't. This way we can tailor family outings to things that he can enjoy as much as the other children.

This book is full of helps, ideas, encouragement, and smiles for all of us who are blessed to love a child with these challenges. Put it on your bookshelf!

Lisa Jo Rudy gives some practical ways to be involved in the community. Her suggestions not only are helpful now, but they are also helpful in planning for the future. Her wisdom can be used to empower kids with special needs to grow into adults who are at home in their communities.

Get Out, Explore, and Have Fun provides parents of Asperger or autism kids with a fine encouragement to get the family involved with the community. From pinpointing family activities from sports to science to museums, science institutions and the arts, this provides handouts about autism and ideas on how institutions can include kids with special needs.