Getting More: How to Negotiate to Achieve Your Goals in the Real World [Hardcover]

Stuart Diamond (Author)

Book Description

Release date: December 28, 2010

This new model of human interaction has been chosen by Google to train the entire company worldwide (30,000 employees), is the #1 book for your career chosen by The Wall Street Journal’s website, and is labeled “phenomenal” by Lawyers’ Weekly and “brilliant” by Liza Oz of the Oprah network.
 
Based on more than 20 years of research and practice among 30,000 people in 45 countries, Getting More concludes that finding and valuing the other party’s emotions and perceptions creates far more value than the conventional wisdom of power and logic. It is intended to provide better agreements for everyone no matter what they negotiate – from jobs to kids to billion dollar deals to shopping.
 
The book, a New York Times bestseller and #1 Wall Street Journal business best seller, is based on Professor Stuart Diamond’s award-winning course at the Wharton Business School, where the course has been the most popular over 13 years. It challenges the conventional wisdom on every page, from “win-win” to BATNA to rationality to the use of power. Companies have made billions of dollars so far using his new model and parents have gotten their 4-year-olds to willingly brush their teeth and go to bed.
 
Prof. Diamond draws from his experience as a Pulitzer Prize winning journalist at The New York Times, Harvard-trained attorney, Wharton MBA, U.N. Consultant in many countries and manager and executive in many sectors, including technology, agriculture, medical services, finance, energy and aviation. “The ROI from reading Getting More will make it the best investment you make this year,” says Rhys Dekle, the business development head of the Microsoft Games division, which produces X-Box. He added that the book was his team’s best investment of the year too. The model was also used to quickly solve the 2008 Hollywood Writer’s Strike.
 
The advice is addressed through the insightful stories of more than 400 people who have used Prof. Diamond’s tools with great success: A 20% savings on an item already on sale. An extra $300 million profit in a business. A woman from India getting out of her own arranged marriage. Better relationships with the family, including teenagers. Raises at work. Better jobs. Dealing with emotional situations. Meeting one’s goals. Finding better things to trade. Solving cultural and political problems, sports conflicts, and ordinary arguments.
 
The book is intended to be used in any situation. The most common response is “life changing”, beginning on page one. “The most inspirational book I have read this year” said David Simon, an attorney in San Francisco, CA. “This book can change the world,” says Craig Silverman, Investment Advisor, Long Island, NY

Product Details

• Hardcover: 416 pages
• Publisher: Crown Business (December 28, 2010)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0307716899
• ISBN-13: 978-0307716897
• Product Dimensions: 6.4 x 1.4 x 9.5 inches
• Shipping Weight: 1.4 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (105 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #52,084 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
  • #53 in Books > Business & Investing > Management & Leadership > Negotiating

Editorial Reviews

From Booklist

Getting to Yes (1991), by William Fisher and others, was just the beginning. Diamond, lawyer, journalist, and professor, using information and ideas gathered from his teachings, has further honed (and perfected) the art of goal-getting in today’s world, no matter what the specific personal or business objective. His 12 invisible strategies, from “goals are paramount” to “prepare and practice,” become the framework for achievement. This does not represent a win-win mentality, as he carefully points out; rather, his type of negotiation is transparent and based on trust, recognizing that personal relationships will always make or break the outcome. Think of this as a series of coaching sessions, facilitated by an expert with more than 20 years’ experience, filled with real-life examples and step-by-step exercises.

— Barbara Jacobs

Review

Acclaim For The New York Times Best-Seller, Getting More, And Author
Stuart Diamond
 
“#1 Business Book to read for your career in 2011.”  Wall Street Journal FINS blog
 
“Phenomenal.” Lawyers Weekly
 
“Brilliant.” Lisa Oz, Oprah Network
 
“This book will give the reader a massive advantage in any negotiation.”  Stephanie Camp, Senior Digital Strategist, Microsoft.
 
“Superb…counterintuitive…immensely useful.” Kirkus starred review (new books)

"The Getting More Model is the negotiation model of choice for our CEO clients & staff of Financial Advisors.”
–Morgan Stanley Smith Barney
 
“The book is amazing . . . extremely powerful in the real world. A must read!” Adam Guren, Chief Investment Officer, First New York Securities
 
“I am living proof that this course does pay! I saved $245 million for my company.” Richard T.   Morena, CFO, Asbury Park Press, NJ
 
 “The most valuable tools in my 15 years in sales, marketing, and business development.” Sandeep Sawhney, Director of Business Development, The Weather Channel

“The best training we have ever received on this or any subject. The benefits are immediate and tangible.”  John Sobel, Senior Vice President/General Counsel, Yahoo

“I am one of Stuart Diamond’s biggest fans; he taught me more than anyone I can recall.” Rob McIntosh, Procurement Director, Dell
 
“The crown jewel; it fundamentally changed my way of thinking.” Ravi Radhakrishnan, Senior Manager, Accenture
 
“The best book I’ve read after the Bible.” Jeff Schultz, Health Benefits Advocate, MN
 
“This book can change the world.” Craig Silverman, Investment Advisor, NY
 
“After just a few chapters, I became a better parent.” Vivek Nadkarni, Technology Exec, CA
 
“Life changing.” Kerri Kuhn, Morrison & Foester Law Firm, CA
 
“Wow, it really works! This stuff is truly valuable.” Matthew Doyle, Director, The Strauss Group HR & Executive Recruitment Co., Buffalo, NY.
 
“Cannot put it down!” Michael Magee, Director, Development Finance Bank, UK
 
“The first book I’ve bought that has actually made me money.” Owen Devitt, Marketing Executive, Enterprise Ireland, Irish Government
 
"I am still amazed how much I learned." Sylvia Reul, Managing Partner, Reul Law Firm, Germany
 
“Definitely, this book is a MUST for everybody.” Katrina Agustin, Network Marketing Firm, Philippines
 
“Stuart Diamond is the master of negotiation.” Robin Khuda, Executive Director, NEXTDC (data centers) Ltd., Australia & New Zealand.
 
“I rely on Stuart Diamond’s negotiation tools every day.”  Christian Hernandez, Head of International Business Development, Facebook.
 
“Practical, immediately applicable and highly effective.” Evan Wittenberg, Chief Talent Officer, Hewlett-Packard
 
“A flexible toolkit for getting your way, whether…a million-dollar deal, a botched restaurant dish, or a petulant 4-year-old.”  Psychology Today
 
“Stuart Diamond equipped me with the tools to be more effective in all of life’s pursuits.” Larry B. Loftus, Head of Procter & Gamble Far East
 
“For women, empowering and enabling.”  Umber Ahmad, Exec Director, Platinum Gate Capital Management; former vice president, Goldman Sachs
 
“Invaluable in helping me achieve my goals, whether on the field, in the office, or at home with my five children.” Anthony Noto, CFO, National Football League
 
“There isn’t an hour that goes by in my personal and professional lives when I don’t use what I learned from you…”  Bill Ruhl, Director, National Customer Service Operations, Verizon

“Wonderful!” Laura Chavez, Host, ABC’s “Let’s Talk Live.”

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Hardcover: 416 pages
• Publisher: Crown Business (December 28, 2010)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0307716899
• ISBN-13: 978-0307716897
• Product Dimensions: 6.4 x 1.4 x 9.5 inches
• Shipping Weight: 1.4 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (105 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #52,084 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
  • #53 in Books > Business & Investing > Management & Leadership > Negotiating

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

77 of 82 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars "Getting More" is a Must Read - Review by a Former Student January 11, 2011

By Mike S.

Format:Hardcover|Amazon Verified Purchase

I studied negotiation with Prof. Diamond as a student at Penn Law. His class is legendary, both at the Law School and Wharton, and it's nearly impossible to get into, at least at the Law School. I got into the class as a 3L, and I was amazed by how well these techniques work. Prof. Diamond encourages his students to use the techniques to go out and haggle with their credit card companies, cell phone carriers, cable companies, and landlords in hopes of getting more from them. By the end of the semester, I most assuredly had gotten more. In fact, when I later called Comcast Cable to try to extend the free six months of HBO and Shotime I'd received while in Prof. Diamond's class, the customer service representative said, "Ok, I'll give you another six months free, but this is the last promotion you're getting. I'm looking at your account, and you have more free promotions than most Comcast employees." (As it turns out, that was not the last freebie Comcast would give me.)

But as time wore on and law school receded into the rearview mirror, I stopped practicing Prof. Diamond's techniques as I had when I took his class. Gradually, my skills faded, although I still brushed them off every now and again when the situation clearly called for them. But I'd stopped contacting my cable company and other service providers to get free goodies, and I slowly forgot just how applicable Prof. Diamond's methods are to nearly every interaction. In short, I started getting less. And then "Getting More" came out.

I realized about a dozen pages into the book that by failing to practice these tools, I was indeed getting less. This book really could not have arrived at a better time for me.... And I can confirm that "Getting More" captures the negotiation course's ideas and strategies to a tee. Many of the phrases Prof. Diamond uses in the book - such as "Be incremental," "Think about the pictures in their heads," "Be extreme, or come to me," and "Is it your policy to [insert behavior]?" - appear verbatim in my course notes.

I'm happy to report that after reading Prof. Diamond's book, I am back to getting more. Just last week, I used standards to buy my wife a pair of skis for less than the ski shop had paid for them. The next time I find myself forgetting to use these tools (and hopefully there won't be a next time), I'll re-read "Getting More." In fact, this is one of those rare books that probably should be re-read annually.

The only downside to this book is that I and others had to pay $40,000 a year at Penn Law or Wharton to learn Prof. Diamond's techniques, while "Getting More" costs a mere $13.85. The tools won't work if they're not used, as I learned, and money won't just fall out of the binding when you open the book. But for those who use Prof. Diamond's techniques, the $13.85 investment will come back to them hundreds of times over, or more. "Getting More" is a must-read. Read more ›

28 of 30 people found the following review helpful

3.0 out of 5 stars Worth reading but be sure to consult other sources as well April 24, 2012

By Bornonthewater

Format:Hardcover

I'll start by saying there is a fair amount good information in this book and I would recommend reading it. Just be prepared to sift through a lot of filler to pick out the things of value. Mr. Diamond pretty regularly delivers a "look how great I am" feel that gets in the way of effectively delivering his message. He uses several examples that are questionable at best and for that reason should have been left out. I do have one fundamental disagreement with Mr. Diamond. He stresses putting yourself in other people's shoes. In the role playing scenarios he describes that can often be helpful just to better prepare you but in an active negotiation it's a sure fire way to make you look like an ass. That's because when you put yourself in someone else's shoes you start to make assumptions about that person. ASSumptions are a quick way to lose credibility and kill a deal. Stick to his method of asking the right questions to get the actual facts and you won't have to put yourself in their shoes because they'll spell it out for you. Also, please don't take his advice on negotiating with every person you see. Leave those poor retail sales people alone. They already put up with enough garbage and don't need you walking into their place of business to practice your newly discovered negotiating techniques on them. Just because you can get a discount doesn't mean you should. If you negotiate with everyone you meet you probably won't be well liked either. Overall, this book delivers a lot of good information and most people will take enough away from it to justify the purchase and time spent reading it. Just don't use it as your only source on negotiation. The rating of the book seems to be inflated because Mr. Diamond appears to have many enthusiastic former students eager to praise him.

16 of 19 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Life changer December 29, 2010

By xerox

Format:Hardcover|Amazon Verified Purchase

Love the book! Prof. Diamond's wisdom and insight will bring about a lot of positive change to the way you communicate and interact with people.

12 of 14 people found the following review helpful

1.0 out of 5 stars Horrible May 8, 2013

By Darlana

Format:Hardcover

I can't believe I picked up this book. It's horrible, and you can tell the author is full of himself. The way to get more in life is to be respectful and nice, not a manipulative jerk. I laughed my way through. So really if you feel the need to hate one more person in this life time then pick this up.

9 of 10 people found the following review helpful

2.0 out of 5 stars Where is the editor? June 3, 2012

By Eddy

Format:Hardcover

Though, yes, this book proposes new and powerful tools and insight about negotiation in fact, it's too long, too confusing, and too chaotically edited. The author can't tell strategies from tools and models. Where is the editor or proofreader? There are too many examples because i think the author uses them as a kind of acknowledgment for his students. This book should be more nice and compact. I don't want to get more!

9 of 10 people found the following review helpful

3.0 out of 5 stars Get more by reading other books as well June 1, 2012

By Professor Sybil

Format:Hardcover

I like this book but there are problems with it that few reviewers mention. Therefore I will focus on a range of problems in an attempt to achieve balance. For a start, experienced negotiators and scholars will find little in it that is unconventional, despite the hype. The main strength of the book is the author's idiosyncratic way of ordering and discussing evergreen themes. To anyone who has studied and practised serious negotiation, the elements of the four quadrant model (Aren't there always four quadrants?) and the twelve strategies will be valuable even though they are conventional apart from the astute strategy "Use Their Standards".

Confidence is fine but there seems to be a lot of implicit and explicit boasting by the author. `"Blah blah blah" said [insert John or Jane Doe], one of my former students and now the President of [insert `Goldman Sachs' etc.].' That is, if you are smart (rich?) enough to take his program and use the Diamond method you are, or will become, a high-flier. The formula becomes tedious.

The last paragraph of chapter 6 (Emotion) makes me wonder about the accuracy of some anecdotes given to the author: `"Her mother and the nurses looked at me like I was some sort of magician," Craig said. "Where did you learn that?" they asked. I'm happy to say he referred them to this book.' Pardon? Craig learned to negotiate from the book in which he is quoted as saying he learned from it? I hope the author is joking with us.

Professor Diamond is at his best when he describes and analyses major cases in which he has been involved, but too much of the book is about egotism and petty power rather than astute negotiation.... Many of the anecdotes depict repugnant attitudes and annoying behaviour by people such as the great negotiator who thinks it is clever to muscle someone at midnight to get some fries, when the less privileged person who feeds the buyer's belly and ego probably should be at home sleeping to prepare for school next morning. So much for empathy. Other reviewers have pointed to financial greed and lust for control, so I will not say more on such matters. Well, one more thing. I wonder how many of those obsessed with screwing someone out of a buck here and there would go to an art gallery only if all the exhibits depicted some form of money.

A small section on page 371 does not do justice to the author and should have been edited out: `I once was so obnoxious that I sat down in their conference room, leaned back in my chair, and put my feet up on their conference table. My message "I'm right at home." ' No, the message was "I have a gargantuan ego and simian manners." Too many American negotiators have a reputation for this sort of crass, naďve tactic, especially in Asia, where I have had a lot of success as a negotiator about things that matter. Test boorish tactics in New York if you like but not in Tokyo, Beijing or Jakarta. They should be discouraged in the interests of dignity and respect, let alone successful negotiating.

The suggestion that a strike-rate of one in nine is good negotiating reminds me of carpet-bombing in Vietnam. It also reminds me of a friend in tele-sales who had one success for every eighty cold calls she made. With obscure logic, whenever someone hung up on her she would say to herself "Thank you for taking me one step closer to a sale."

Concerning the familiar picture (page 59) used in psychological tests, I wonder how the author `passed out copies of each half of the picture--the old woman and the young woman--to different halves of the class'. The elements that comprise the old woman also comprise the young one.

A revised edition should: (a) be shorter by at least 25 per cent, (b) exclude trivia and repetitiveness, (c) include an index, (d) include a complete chapter on ethics, and (e) be edited by a professional editor. I also recommend a new title, as the current one suggests exponential greed and, like many of the anecdotes, does not match the author's recommendation that we negotiate intelligently, with empathy and in the spirit of fairness and reciprocity. How about `Getting and Giving More'? The change in title would require significant change in content.

From other reviews, and comments on them, it seems a few members of the Wharton-Diamond cheer squad are ready to unleash a fusillade at anyone who does not give unqualified praise to this book. Professor Diamond might consider asking them to hold fire.

This book can help negotiators in any field to improve their skills but it must be read with a constructively critical eye. Certainly buy it, but also read a few other books that are outstanding for practical and intellectual reasons (e.g. Herb Cohen's `You Can Negotiate Anything', `The [Hostage] Negotiator' by Ben Lopez, `The Creative Negotiator' by Stephen Kozicki, and Tony English's profound 'Tug of War: The Tension Concept and the Art of International Negotiation'). Read more ›