23 of 23 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Well written, solid advice., February 28, 2010
This review is from: Getting Naked Again: Dating, Romance, Sex, and Love When You've Been Divorced, Widowed, Dumped, or Distracted (Paperback)
So, here I am. Forty years old and fresh out of a 19 year long marriage. On one hand, I'm tempted to give up, grab my dog and retreat to singlehood forever. But, for some reason, I can't. Even though I'm shy and reclusive, I feel the need for a significant other in my life.
I tried online dating for a few months and was beset by weirdos and creeps. Is there something wrong with me that I only attract losers? I finally broke down and bought a couple of dating books. Let me first say that I loathe the concept of self-help and pop psychology. I think of myself as a unique and special snowflake and none of that drivel applies to my perfect, unique self, right?! Wrong.
This book doesn't exactly say anything you don't already know, but it presents it in a clear way. For me, it helped crystallize my intent, and offered consolation that other women have walked this path and emerged happy. She also points out certain pitfalls that might be unique to older women. For example, how does your relationship with all the other men in your life change once you become single? I hadn't exactly thought about that, but suddenly realized why some of my long standing male friends and co-workers seem a little less at ease around me. They're not quite 'buddies' anymore.
After reading it, I'm determined to go on more dates with men that I may have unfairly rejected for petty reasons. Yes, I have rejected men on the basis of poor spelling. I'm determined that the next guy doesn't have to be the one and only. He can be a pleasant evening and nothing more. I've reconsidered that it might be okay to become physically intimate with someone I don't intend to spend the rest of my life with.
Most of all, I really enjoyed the author's writing style and witty asides. I will definitely read more of her books. Lastly, can I point out that she has coined one of the most delightful phrases I've ever come across? "Fretful salsa of age". I just love it. I'm so glad this was the first dating advice book I read. Check out my other reviews for the flip side of the coin.
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6 of 7 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars
Very Practical!, October 16, 2009
A practical guide to dating after loss for older women. I probably wouldn't recommend it to anyone under 40, as it seems aimed at women who are middle-aged or older. Many of the situations and most of the advice wouldn't apply to younger women who divorced or were widowed early on. But very practical advice and sensitive to your situation!
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8 of 10 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Even Old Guys Can Learn Something, May 25, 2010
As a 65-year-old widower who hasn't been on a date since 1977, I know I've probably got a bit of brushing up to do, when it comes to dating. While "Getting Naked Again: Dating, Romance, Sex, and Love When You've Been Divorced, Widowed, Dumped, or Distracted" hasn't been a literal dating how-to, it does let you know that you're sharing the same boat of fears and apprehensions with the women you may be dating. Frankly, I think the author wrote with a greater direction to those in their 30s, 40s, and perhaps, early 50s. Those of us in our 60s and beyond have many other issues, with which we deal, when dating, romance, and sex re-enter our lives. With adult children and grandchildren, estate issues inevitably come into play when selecting a new partner. You worry more about being stripped financially naked than getting naked for senior sex(whatever that is.) And, one cannot discount issues of health that inevitably come into play when seeking out a future companion. I'd like someone to tell me what you do when you think you've met the next partner of your dreams and discover that they're taking multiple medications every day. Or, when you begin a relationship and the "prospect" can't seem to stop talking about their ex or late spouse.
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