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97 of 101 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Best of Breed
I have read extensively on negotiation, including everything written by folks affiliated with the Harvard Negotiation Project. I think that _Getting Past No_ is the best of all the books.
Its conciseness is deceptive. The concepts expressed are profound. For example, I cannot count the number of clients to whom I have explained the concept of BATNA (best alternative...
Published on March 6, 2001 by Ruth Edlund

versus
18 of 19 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars 1st Read Getting To Yes; Then if Stumped, Try This
This is the next book to read after you've practiced the basic steps of Getting to Yes, for when the other person keeps saying "no." It helped me deal with really fuming, intransigent or deceitful behaviors of others, with specific techniques to:
* Defuse anger, hostility or defensiveness
* Control my own responses during hot moments
* Find out what people...
Published on August 13, 2009 by Roben Torosyan PhD


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97 of 101 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Best of Breed, March 6, 2001
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This review is from: Getting Past No: Negotiating in Difficult Situations (Paperback)
I have read extensively on negotiation, including everything written by folks affiliated with the Harvard Negotiation Project. I think that _Getting Past No_ is the best of all the books.
Its conciseness is deceptive. The concepts expressed are profound. For example, I cannot count the number of clients to whom I have explained the concept of BATNA (best alternative to a negotiated agreement, i.e. what you do if the negotiations fail) before we head into a session of mediation or other negotiation. I have reread this book several times at widely spaced intervals and have found it better than I remembered each time.
I think this particular book is also much more helpful to those who participate in negotiations that are less structured than labor or arms negotiations that are highly choreographed than was _Getting to Yes_, which at times seemed to assume that all players in the negotiation would be using the same text.
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70 of 73 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Impasse Blockbusting, January 26, 2003
By 
Jon Linden (Warren, N.J. United States) - See all my reviews
(VINE VOICE)   
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This review is from: Getting Past No: Negotiating in Difficult Situations (Paperback)
In his superb book, William Ury builds on the pricipals first put forth in his first book with Roger Fisher, "Getting To Yes." In "Getting Past No" Ury discusses the nuances and niceties of negotiating using a joint problem solving approach which is "interest based" rather than being "rights based" or "power based." Ury explains that the challenge is to convert a confrontational situation to a cooperative creative problem solving process, that integrates the parties in a negotiation into a cooperative mode, that results in the best long term agreements.
The specific wonder of this book, is its focus on what to do, when you don't know how to get past a problem. Ury calls his method the "Breakthrough Strategy" and is virtually totally as applicable for mediators as it is for negotiators. In fact, several times, Ury mentions that a mediator may assist the process.
Simply put, Ury contends that there are basically 5 things that one needs to do to preserve smooth negotiations and to break through an impasse if it occurs. He calls these 'steps' by the following designations: "Go To The Balcony", "Step To Their Side", "Reframe", "Build Them A Golden Bridge" and "Use Power To Educate." These simple concepts are extremely useful tools for negotiators and mediators alike.
There is no disappointment in this book. The approach and the writing style are just superb. Once again, the Harvard Group, especially William Ury, have produced a book that anyone can gain from and is almost a must for those in dispute resolution and negotiation on a day to day basis.
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48 of 52 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars The 2nd Best Book on Negotiation, April 25, 2001
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This review is from: Getting Past No: Negotiating in Difficult Situations (Paperback)
I thing "Getting to Yes" is the best book on negotiation in the market. It sets the outline. "Getting Past No" shows how to win difficult partner over the way you think. As in "Getting to Yes", Ury uses successfully a 5 step method for his method called "breakthrough negotiation".
1) Don't react 2) Disarm them 3) change the game 4) Make it easy to say YES 5) Make it hard to say NO
5 excellent steps in winning over a reluctant negotiation partner. Simple and clear steps that can have a great impact.
Getting Past No stands on its own. You don't need to have read Getting to Yes to understand and appreciate this one. Only do I love to go back to the basics of negotiation over and over, and their is for me no supplement to Getting to Yes.
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25 of 26 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars

#4 of my Top 10 Books on Negotiation, January 8, 1998

By 
eric@batna.com (Portola Valley, CA) - See all my reviews
This review is from: Getting Past No: Negotiating in Difficult Situations (Paperback)
Sometimes I'm tempted to tell people to bypass Getting to Yes and just go straight to this spin-off. It imparts the same essence of mutual-gains negotiation, and additionally includes lessons in good basic strategy for dealing with others' negotiation tactics, tricks, and attacks. While Getting to Yes gives you the foundation of principle-centered negotiation, this book focuses on what to do when that principle-centered negotiation breaks down due to the other side's deceitful, confused, or just plain difficult behavior. If this were a sales book, it would be called something like "Dealing with Sales Objections," but as a negotiation book, it's even more effective: It addresses ways of identifying and dealing with common barriers we all face when trying to strike deals.
Getting Past No has the same concise, pithy style as Getting to Yes, which makes the tactics sound a lot simpler than they prove to be when you try to put them into practice. But as an analysis of difficult negotiation and as a general roadmap to the land of "Don't get mad, don't get even, get what you want!", it really can't be beat.
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18 of 19 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars 1st Read Getting To Yes; Then if Stumped, Try This, August 13, 2009
Verified Purchase(What's this?)
This review is from: Getting Past No: Negotiating in Difficult Situations (Paperback)
This is the next book to read after you've practiced the basic steps of Getting to Yes, for when the other person keeps saying "no." It helped me deal with really fuming, intransigent or deceitful behaviors of others, with specific techniques to:
* Defuse anger, hostility or defensiveness
* Control my own responses during hot moments
* Find out what people really want
* Deepen inquiry into assumptions
The five steps here go even further than the first book:
1) Don't react: Go to the balcony (name the game; buy time to think; etc.)
2) Disarm them: Step to their side (paraphrase feelings too; agree without conceding; say "Yes, and")
3) Change the game: Don't reject; reframe (ask "What makes that fair?"; reinterpret, deflect or expose; negotiate the rules of the game; etc.)
4) Make it easy for them to say yes: Build them a golden bridge (involve the other; help them save face; go slow to go fast; etc.)
5) Make it hard to say no: Bring them to their senses, not their knees (use power to educate; use the minimum power necessary; let them choose; etc.)
It's really funny to me to reread these ideas, as I forget them all the time. For ex.: I constantly say "But," because it seems to get attention. But instead saying "Yes, and" would create so much less unneeded friction. I'd grade this a B+.
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17 of 18 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent: Clear & Practical, May 19, 2006
By 
Clovis (Chicago, Illinois United States) - See all my reviews
This review is from: Getting Past No: Negotiating in Difficult Situations (Paperback)
GETTING PAST NO by William Ury is well written and will become a classic must-read if it is not already. The book is brief, easy-to-read yet is strinkingly powerful and useful. The primary benefit from reading this book is how pratical it is. You can use the tools, tactics, and concepts in this book in professional life, business or even to negotiate with friends. In summary, if you want to improve your ability to negotiate, you would be doing yourself a very big favor by acquiring a copy of this book.

HIGHLIGHTS:

The aim of a negotiation is to reach a mutually beneficial outcome for the parties involved. To accomplish that end, you must identify your interests and your prize (desireable outcome). Further, you must also accurately identify your "opponent's" interests as well. What concerns might the other party have? Needs? A person's needs can be tangible as well as intangible such as the need to safe-face or be respected.

The strategy to negotiate effectively to reach a mutually beneficial outcome include (1) an objective and honest analysis of the negotiation and the process; (2) understanding the other party or parties by seeing the situation from their perspective; (3) reframing the negotiation to focus on satisfying interests and not on "positional statements;" (4) make it difficult for the other side to say no by building a "golden bridge" by acknowledging, involving, and respecting the other side; (5) bringing the other side to their senses by educating them on the consequences from not reaching a mutually satisfying agreement.

CLOSING

--

In closing, the organization of the book and the clarity in which the concepts are explained really add to the value of the book and makes it easier for readers to apply the material. A useful tool is the BATNA, which is your Best Alternative To a Negotiated Agreement; this is your measuring tool for the agreement you reach. It is also important to identify as well as develop one's BATNA when necessary to determine whether or not one should even negotiate. The author explains negotiations superbly, and virtually every aspect is covered from tactics (obstructive, offensive, depective) to pratical steps to draw the other side in to the negotiation process. I quite confidently recommend this book.

I hope the above was useful,

Clovis
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16 of 17 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A practical guidebook to "Win-Win" negotiation., July 29, 1998
This review is from: Getting Past No: Negotiating in Difficult Situations (Paperback)
William Ury is a not only an experienced high-level negotiator but an acute student of his art who can distill his wisdom into concise, memorable lessons. This book is indispensable for anyone who wants to do well in negotiations, formal or informal, without humiliating or destroying the other side. For Ury and his disciples, Win-Win is not a feel-good aspiration but a profitable practice. As a negotiation style which builds relationships while getting things done, Win-Win is a cornerstone of the "Sustainable Workstyles" we teach at MayoGenuine.
A key insight of his method is the possibility of being "soft on the people, hard on the problem." Negotiation is often associated with macho words like "bruising," "hard nosed," and "marathon" that it is easy to forget negotiation is not war pursued by other means. We negotiate as an alternative to battle, not as another version of it. Everyone wants an acceptable outcome and! would prefer to get to it without being harmed. Ury techniques for separating the issues from the personalities help produce resolutions without unnecessary upsets and leave all involved willing to negotiate another day.
Many books and articles use familiar examples from the news to illustrate their points. The difference with Getting Past No is that when Ury talks about the Cuban missile crisis is is with the authority of one who was in the room with JFK. He has also participated in labor negotiations, mergers and conversations with his children. His research and personal authority inform every suggestion.
If you are ready to reduce the time you spend capitulating and combating, if you are ready to start taking responsibility for crafting Win-Win agreements, then reading and applying this short book is your best start.
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12 of 12 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars One of the best books on negotiation, July 19, 2005
By 
T. Loo (California) - See all my reviews
This review is from: Getting Past No: Negotiating in Difficult Situations (Paperback)
"Getting Past No" further elaborates on the ideas based on Ury's first book "Getting to Yes." I read it front to back, probably 4-5 times now and I take something new from it everytime. The best thing about this book is that it bridges the gap between negotiation models and conflict resolution books--something that I've seen very little of on the bookshelf. The techniques that Ury offers are not industry specific and can be applied to both business, professional, or interpersonal relationships. He also writes it in a very easy to understand format, with each chapter being a new step in the process. Ury is right on when he says that overcoming difficult people are one of the biggest obstacles in a negotiation and his approach is the benchmark that I have been using in my own teachings and in my own book.
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15 of 16 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Goes along with Getting to Yes, May 7, 2000
By 
This review is from: Getting Past No: Negotiating in Difficult Situations (Paperback)
Clearly the book on negotiation to read if you enjoyed reading Getting to Yes. Where the former sets the framework, Getting past No deals with a straight-forward five-step strategy for tackling difficult people. Highly recommended as a supplementary to Getting to Yes.
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14 of 16 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Immediately useful, stimulating and wise, June 11, 1999
By A Customer
This review is from: Getting Past No: Negotiating in Difficult Situations (Paperback)
This book is filled with advice that will help you in your very next negotiation. Like Getting to YES, it's easy to read, entertaining, and most importantly, enormously helpful. The theory is elegant, and therefore easy to internalize.
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Getting Past No: Negotiating in Difficult Situations
Getting Past No: Negotiating in Difficult Situations by William Ury (Paperback - January 1, 1993)
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