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Getting Ready For Marriage [Kindle Edition]

Jerry D Hardin , Dianne C Sloan
4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (66 customer reviews)

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Book Description

The saying goes "When you marry, you don't just marry an individual, you marry a whole family."  But more specifically, you are marrying the influences that family has had on your spouse.  Our families have shaped our views on everything from religion to finances to sex, and, whether helpful or harmful, these views are brought to our marriage and can unknowingly affect it.

Getting Ready for Marriage Workbook helps engaged couples and newlyweds:
  • learn what "ghosts' they bring to marriage
  • examine their family backgrounds
  • determine guidelines for their own marriage
Through interactive exercises, couples discover the roots of their beliefs, sight potential problem ares, and learn how to successfully through problems.  Couples are then encouraged to make their own covenants in specific areas such as financial matters, resolving conflict, religious orientation,. and family planning & children-essential in building a strong marriage partnership.

Product Details

  • File Size: 2084 KB
  • Print Length: 292 pages
  • Publisher: Thomas Nelson (January 7, 1992)
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B000VI62TO
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Lending: Not Enabled
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #536,079 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
80 of 81 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Use to spur important conversations June 9, 2006
By Rehey
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
This book is a nice start for Christian couples (not recommended for people looking for a general, nonreligious/spiritual view) in that it raises important issues and encourages you to keep the discussion open afterward. The book is organized into topics such as Finance, Family Planning etc...and your future spouse answers the questions separately from you, guessing how you might answer, as well as answering for him/herself. Then the book asks you to grade how many questions you answered wrong/right, and sign a covenent on each subject based on things discussed. As thorough as this might be, there are some issues to keep in mind while reading this: 1) The language assumes certain roles and biases, which you may or may not agree with whether or not you are a Christian. E.g. "My father usually left a good tip for the waitress/waiter in restaurants," or irrelevant questions such as questions assuming your parents are still together or their relationship was consistent throughout their marriage. Some of the questions don't seem to have been updated for several decades. 2) You have to answer true or false, though many of the statements are not that easily answered. My fiancee and I ended up disregarding the scoring process, and discussing statements we thought were partly true or partly false rather than simplifying things to a T or F. The point is not to get a certain score after all, the point is to grow and learn about each other. 3) The chapter on finances is somewhat unspecific, so my fiancee and I are going to read a guide to finance next. There are other topics that are broad as well, but this book is designed that way. It's up to you to follow through to the next steps. If you think finishing this book prepares you for marriage, you possibly are walking into marriage short-sighted. It is a good vehicle, however, for starting the conversation that you and your future spouse will continue to have for the rest of your lives. Good luck!
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52 of 52 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Helped us nip a lot of things in the bud! February 8, 1999
By A Customer
Any pre-marital preparation and counseling is a good idea in my book, but this is something special. While we were engaged and living in different cities, my wife and I went through this workbook individually chapter by chapter and discussed our responses over the phone. So many topics came up that we would never have thought to be major issues for us to deal with! The particular strength of this book over some others is the authors' emphasis on families of origin. We each bring so much baggage and so many expectations into the marriage that comes from our families where we grew up! Many books ignore this, but Sloan and Hardin wisely forced us to look hard beyond puppy love and into real-life commitment. I get the feeling the authors have seen their share of wrecked marriages, have traced the problems, and have used that knowledge in the creation this book. Highly recommended.
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211 of 239 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars Extremely Religious Guide April 6, 2001
The book itself I'm sure is an excellent guide for devout Christians, or Christians period. The fact that every single page had at least one religious reference made it very difficult for a nonreligious person to read.
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33 of 35 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Good, easy book to do together December 21, 2005
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
My wife and I did this book before we got married. The chapters are very short, only a couple of pages, and getting through the book is relatively easy. We set a goal of one chapter per week, but if we missed a week, it was easy to make up.

Besides the short chapters there were a few "list exercises" to complete. We would complete them separately, then compare afterwards. The great thing about this book is that it helps to start conversation about various topics. In a way, that is the best part of a pre-marital book, getting couples to talk about themselves, especially about topics that they may not regularly discuss. With discussion, expections can be set, and points of view can be expressed before there are conflicts. It doesn't mean that there will be no conflicts, but at least you talked about it beforehand...

Regardless of whether you're Christian or not, this book has a good breadth of discussion points that could be very useful to anyone.
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24 of 26 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars this book is not for everyone June 13, 2006
By E. Webb
This book asks some good questions. There are important points that each couple should be talking about, however, the scoring for the test is very confusing. Also, my boyfriends parents are both deceased. Many of the questions are about your parents and family. The questions do not take into account the different circumstances in many people's lives. The questions are geared toward a young couple in an ideal situation. What about adoption or foster care families? We ended up being very frustrated after doing 2 chapters of the book. We decided to read the questions to each other and not score it. This way we use it to get to know each other.
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19 of 20 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars better than professional premarital counseling! November 30, 2004
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
My husband and I have been happpily married for over ten years. We didn't want to make a mistake, so we had professional and pastoral counseling as we were preparing for our marriage. We also went through one chapter a week of this book and found this book to be far more effective than the other types of counseling.

We each completed questions that got us to talking about our perceptions about the different aspects of marriage that had been formed by the way things were in our family of origin. When we uncovered differences, we discussed them and became far more aware of why they were differing opinions. Even better, we came to resolution about how our own marriage would become. This book is a must for every engaged couple!
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Great
Insightful, book, well written, practical guidance for all couples planning to enter into marriage. What more can I say? Read it yourself.
Published 6 days ago by ADESHOLA EZEOKOLI
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellant Resource!!!
I purchased this for my nephew, I hope it will give them both the foundation to start off with. Or maybe the author should write a follow up book.... Read more
Published 18 days ago by Cheryl Washington
1.0 out of 5 stars Not for young Couples
If you even slightly known your future spouse or communicate then this book is a waste of time. For example, it asks things along the lines of, Who are your spouses best friends? Read more
Published 1 month ago by CRunk
5.0 out of 5 stars Great
Worked great and the result is fabulous, this is something I must share with those that that I thing may benefit.
Published 2 months ago by Al Rutherford
5.0 out of 5 stars .Required for all couples!
This is a great book. We have used it for years and require anyone getting marriage counseling to purchase to begin the sessions. Great book!
Published 2 months ago by Shieye
5.0 out of 5 stars This is a great resource for every newly engaged couple.
My wife and I use this workbook with every couple who plan to get married. I love how it asks unique questions that most people never think about.
Published 2 months ago by Brandon
5.0 out of 5 stars Great workbook
Some workbooks are not really workbooks, but more of a devotional. This really is a workbook. The entire book is activities that get you & your partner talking and communicating... Read more
Published 3 months ago by BambiWatson
5.0 out of 5 stars For My Son and girlfriend
My Son and his girlfriend were talking about marriage and our preacher had a sermon using this book. They worked together on it. FYI...they are now engaged.
Published 3 months ago by K. D. Baxter
5.0 out of 5 stars Christian based. . . Great tool
This is a great book for any couples that are engaged or not engaged but discussing marriage. It goes into all aspects of marriage in way that makes you reflect on your childhood... Read more
Published 4 months ago by Karen
5.0 out of 5 stars Highly recommended for any one contemplating marriage.
Excellent working sessions that force both parties to address and resolve issues that are sure to come up after marriage, and could turn out to be deal breakers. Read more
Published 5 months ago by J. D. Kumana
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