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Getting Through to the Man You Love: The No-Nonsense, No-Nagging Guide for Women Paperback – October 27, 1999


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Product Details

  • Paperback: 272 pages
  • Publisher: Golden Guides from St. Martin's Press; 1st edition (October 27, 1999)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 158238035X
  • ISBN-13: 978-1582380353
  • Product Dimensions: 6 x 0.7 x 9 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (17 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #374,734 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Michele Weiner-Davis is an internationally renowned relationship expert and therapist in private practice. She specializes in a revolutionary therapy approach-Solution-Oriented Brief Therapy-aimed at helping people change their lives quickly and painlessly. She is the best-selling author of Divorce and Change Your Life and Everyone in It and the co-author of In Search of Solutions. She is the creator of the relationship program Keeping Love Alive. She lives outside of Chicago with her husband and two children.

More About the Author

Michele Weiner Davis, MSW, is an internationally renowned relationship expert, highly acclaimed speaker and author of several books including the best-selling The Sex-Starved Marriage, and the best-selling Divorce Busting, The Divorce Remedy, Getting Through to the Man You Love, Change Your Life and Everyone in It, and In Search of Solutions. She has appeared as a regular guest on Oprah, 48 Hours, the Today show, CBS This Morning, and 20/20. Michele is the Founder and Director of The Divorce Busting Center with offices in Colorado and Illinois. Her popular websites, www.divorcebusting.com and www.sexstarvedwife.com offer visitors practical information for making their marriages more loving and lusty. She lives in Colorado with her husband.

On a personal note, there was a specific reason Michele developed a passion for helping couples fall in love again and keep their marriages and families together. She grew up in an East Coast version of the Walton family. Michele had two parents who loved her and her two brothers. Her parents never fought. Michele had lots of friends and was a good student, so life for her as a child was wonderful. There was a big extended family, so holidays were warm and memorable.

All this came to a screeching halt when she turned 16 and was a senior in highschool. Her mother sat the whole family down and told them that she had been unhappy for 23 years of marriage. Needless to say, this was a shocking revelation because Michele's parents never fought. Then her mother announced, "There comes a time in everyone's life when you have to throw in the towel." Those words changed Michele's life forever. Not only did her parents marriage dissolve, her warm, nurturing family disbanded completely. Her mother had been the hub of the wheel in the family and when she divorce, she resigned from the position. Michele left for college shortly after this announcement and as she did, her home, her family fell apart.

As a result, Michele has been determined to make her own marriage work and to learn everything she could about what it takes to have a healthy and loving relationship so that she could teach it to everyone who crossed her path. This fire within her led her to specializing in work with couples and writing the best-selling book, Divorce Busting. She feels blessed that she has helped hundreds of thousands of couples to renew their love and decide to make their marriages work. She's convinced that people don't just fall out of love, they simply don't have the skills they need to make love last. And these skills, she believes, can definitely be acquired. Visitors to her web site www.divorcebusting.com find resources to resolve conflict and reconnect. This is her mission in life- to help people restore their love.

For more information, go to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michele_Weiner-Davis

Customer Reviews

It has even been fun to try out things differently than the way I had always handled them.
Lisa Short
I have recommended this to several friends- all of whom have thanked me- one said she was buying copies for her daughter and daughter-in-law!
book junkie
This is an action book and you can easily use her advice to change some of the things that need changing in your relationships.
T. Stewart

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

47 of 49 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on June 18, 2004
Format: Paperback
Let me just say - I loved this book, and have loaned it to some friend who've been very impessed as well. I'm shocked it only has one review so far, and so was inspired to write another.
It's very pragmatic, action-oriented, and goal oriented. I actually took notes on it. Here's a summary of my notes(although you'll definately want the get the book, if just for the examples and short stories alone):
Instead of thinking of things he shouldn't do, think of what he should do.
Your goals should be specific and action oriented, like "hold hands in movies".
Break your goals into mini-goals
If a particular stragety doesn't work, don't do it! Keep your eyes on the cheese.
Do something different strategies:
- do something unexpected
- do a 180
- act as if...
- "easier done than said", i.e. take action
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66 of 73 people found the following review helpful By Louise on May 8, 2000
Format: Paperback
I am only one of a lot of women out there but wanted to personally say I love this book.
I call it my "man bible". I literally carry it with me all the time. I don't keep it at home because heaven forbid he would find it. I have now read the book twice and am now going through it again a third time underlining everything that I want to emphasize in my head. That way I figured I could look at these lined phrases in those emergency circumstances.
This wonderful book has really given me new eyes to look through. I will probably memorize it from cover to cover and then read some more. I have already seen some changes! This book is the best thing I have found in a long time.
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27 of 29 people found the following review helpful By Jill Williams on February 21, 2006
Format: Paperback
Are you bitter because everything you try to discuss with your man never seems to be heard, let alone get through? Then this is he book for you! Michele Weiner-Davis is amazing! Its like she's been there. The ending is the best, though! If your marriage is in trouble because of communication problems, this is a must have! It sure helped me! And I didn't think ANYTHING could save us!
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12 of 13 people found the following review helpful By T. Stewart on August 11, 2004
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
The author is right and her book is a refreshing read. This is an action book and you can easily use her advice to change some of the things that need changing in your relationships. Interestingly enough, this book is on my shelf right next to Karen Pryor's Don't Shoot the Dog - both are great books on how to shape and change behavior... and they're both well grounded.
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8 of 8 people found the following review helpful By Melissa Flores on May 31, 2009
Format: Paperback
everything my mother taught me just came flying off the window! This book is such a practical eye opener to the things women leave unnoticed or take for granted about the men the love. I recommended it to every married woman i know!
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5 of 5 people found the following review helpful By Matt on February 21, 2012
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
It's great, every man shoud get a copy for his wife, if she's ok with it. The best thing about the author is that she is very down to earth and uses realistic approaches to real problems. If you apply what you read, you are bound to see results. She is also the author of the Divorce Remedy which I have found very helpful.
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9 of 11 people found the following review helpful By mrssmith on July 10, 2008
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
I read this book cover to cover in 3 nights before going to sleep. I plan to read it through again, and try to use the suggestions that are given. Ms. Weiner-Davis does impart a sense of being there for you and genuinely wanting to help. Some of the suggestions are very original, others, I'm not sure how one could ever follow through with these and not get into some major conflict with your spouse.
Ms. Weiner-Davis presents herself as someone I would love to have for my own family therapist- she's very personable and funny. The book may not save my marriage, but I have learned some valuable actions that can be taken to change the unhealthy patterns a relationship can fall into.
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6 of 7 people found the following review helpful By Jazzy J on February 10, 2010
Format: Paperback
So the title is a little off putting, it almost seems as if you're going to be manipulating your relationship and the person you're with. BUT, as soon as you start reading, you feel that there is a lot of truth in what Michelle is saying. It's not how to change the person, but really how to use their "language" to your benefit. It's really a guide in effective communication. Hopefully by succumbing to how your mate talks and listens, they'll be more aware of how you talk and listen, and therefore it would be mutually beneficial. Some of the analogies are a little, "eh", but I loved the ideas she suggested. It gives me more ideas to use in my own relationship.

I wouldn't show your partner that you're reading it though, haha, may come off the wrong way!
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