Customer Reviews

The Gift of Being Yourself: The Sacred Call to Self-Discovery

5 star:		(11)
4 star:		(1)
3 star:		(2)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(1)

 

 

Perhaps the best book on Christian Identity I've read and the best book I've read this year. Benner drives home the profound yet paradoxically simple nature of our relationship to self and others through our relationship with the Divine. In "The Gift of Being Yourself" Benner outlines practical ways to improve your relationship with the Divine and through relationship with the Divine begin to understand our true self and calling. I read this after reading Benner's "Surrender to Love." The two go hand-in-hand, but I recommend reading "The Gift of Being Yourself" before reading "Surrender to Love" (just my opinion).

"The Gift of Being Yourself" is an exceptional investigation of the subject of self-identity. The author, David Benner, is able to masterfully bridge the Biblical paradox of death-to-self and self-discovery. He writes, "For if we find our true self we find God, and if we find God, we find our most authentic self." We don't find our true self by seeking self-identity but by seeking God.

Benner sees our identity not as a creation but as a discovery and as a gift from God. By discovering and living our uniqueness, we fulfill our destiny. The purpose of the book is to assist people in the transformational journey of becoming their true self in Christ and living out the vocation that this involves. To do so we must know ourselves as known by God. In knowing ourselves and knowing God we can experience the gift of being ourselves.

The author contends that through self-deception, we tend to confuse our true self with some ideal self we wish we were. We adopt mask that portray us differently than who we authentically are. Self-discovery is not to escape reality but to commit to it. We must decide to accept what is really there and accept ourselves as we are and accept God as He is, not how we would want each to be. Spiritual transformation does not result from fixing our problems. Our sin nature is not self-fixable. Instead, spiritual transformation results from turning to God in the midst of our problems and meeting God just as we are.

It starts by coming to know God. If we come to know God, we come to know love, and to love God is to know God. It's not simply knowing about God, but it is personally meeting God in Jesus. To do so Benner recommends Spirit-guided meditation of the Gospels and meeting God in the events of life through prayerfully reviewing each day. Benner puts a high value on solitude throughout the process of self-discovery. He gives instruction and insights into carrying out these disciplines.

All of us tend to reject our true self that is created in the likeness of God. Instead we chose a way independent of God that is our false self. This false-self is created out of placing my value in what I have, what I do and what people think of me, rather than in God's loving acceptance of me. If we do not want to live in bondage to our false-self we must be prepared to be other than our image of our self. We must allow God to embrace us just the way we really are.

Coming to know and trust God's love is a lifelong process. It begins by letting God know our desire to experience His perfect love. We must allow God to accept us just as we are and enable us to accept ourselves. In doing this we dare to allow God access to the dark parts of our soul. Self-acceptance always precedes genuine self-surrender and self-transformation.

Following a discovery of our authentic self, Benner then moves into a discovery of our vocation. Our vocation is always a response to a Divine call to take our place in the Kingdom of God. It always involves the care of God's creation and people, moving us to humility, love, self-sacrifice and stewardship. From Luke 4 Benner wonderfully explains that Jesus' understanding of vocation came out of wrestling with God, himself and the devil in the solitude of the wilderness.

"The Gift of Being Yourself" is a thoughtful, practical, and easy read. It is not the definitive textbook for self-discovery nor does it fully answer all of the questions. Yet, the small investment of time you spend reading the book may provide just what you've needed to begin the journey of self-discovery through an encounter with God.

On its own, discovering ourself could be quite dangerous. David Benner puts the importance of knowing one's self in proper perspective. It's not "who I am," but "who I am in Christ." Who I am in Christ is a beloved creation of God, fraught with sinfulness but loved nevertheless. Knowing this is the starting point for allowing God, trusting God to have his will in my life. It is at the same time reassuring and humbling. It does not go against the teachings of Christ and Paul when they said we must deny ourselves, and be crucified with Christ. If I don't accept who I am in Christ, how can I possibly deny myself?

A copy of this book literally fell of a library shelf a year or so ago and ever since then I've been such a fan that I've recommended it to nearly everyone I know. We are currently using the book in an adult study to rave reviews. I recommend this book to anyone who wants to go deeper, not in their knowledge ABOUT God, but in their KNOWING of God.

An awesome, powerful and eye opening walk to discovering your identity in God through Jesus Christ and the purpose for which your were created.

While this book is relatively thin, don't let the size deceive you! You will want to read this one several times (with a journal in hand). Written by a Christian psychologist it goes deeper than the first glance. Highly recommended especially for anyone who is struggling with their identity in Christ or more importantly, anyone who thinks they've already got that "wired."

I found Benner to be a man of spiritual depth who has walked with God long enough to grasp more deeply than most the level of acceptance and grace He offers.

It's an easy read but full of challenging thoughts and personal exercises to deepen one's own experience of God's unchanging grace.

This is an excellent book for one who is ready to be genuine and is struggling with the issue of knowing God verses knowing about God. It is a journey and this is a tool that can help with self awareness and God awareness. I highly recommend it.

This is a short book, but needs to be read slowly to digest all the points Benner makes about going on this inner journey. He talks about the contemplative life the Desert Fathers might have sought after, but puts it in modern terms. Daydreaming on a gospel story, reflecting on your day to find where God was, embracing all of who we are because God does are all salient points and exercises that lead one to accepting the gift of being yourself.
The book goes against our present church culture of producing for God and reminds us that God already loves us and wants us to slow down and spend time with Him.

yes, the message of the book is one no christian today can dismiss (even if they think psychology WON'T explain away everything): the real problems we humans deal go very very deep. thus, david g. benner's book (one that echoes "Abba's Child" by Brennan Manning) is one that essentially, is a spiritual exploration into the very essence of every human being. while most books in the christian retail world deal with how to help you "fix" or "deny" or "abandon" or "QUIT!" sinning, benner's book realizes that this is not essentially the "core" matter of the "problem" we all seem to face. these are symptoms of a much deeper problem and as one reads along with benner, one realizes that he is on to something saints like thomas merton and teresa de avila explored exhaustively.the reason i'm not giving this book more stars is not b/c of the message...for it is truly one EVERY person needs to hear. but it is b/c of the writing (who am I to judge, right?) and the end-of-the-chapter "try this experience out" thing that seems to marginalize and discourage creativity, in a book that seems to so be preaching in the opposite direction. if we're trying to run away from talking in christianese, and resist speaking in words and phrases that really don't MEAN anything to us, then why must the author include these end-of-the-chapter "sit silence for five minutes and do this..."??? i'm not harping on his instructions, for many of them are good and worthy and very valuable things to do. i'm only wishing he would've backed off a bit. he's possibly trying to write to a broader audience and this, perhaps, helps the baby boomer generation out a bit, but for someone who's 22 and constantly trying to experience God and know God and make this knowledge personal, real, authentic, life-changing and transformative (through and by the work of the Holy Spirit) and just still wrap my head around the idea that being is better than doing, and knowing i'm no longer a sinner but a saint, this little bit slightly bends some of the book's total punch for me.however, all things considering, it's one i'm recommending nonetheless. you can read it in an afternoon, so get it and see for yourself.