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The Gift of Fear Kindle Edition

by Gavin de Becker (Author)

1,452 customer reviews

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A Special Kindle Edition of The Gift of Fear, with a new Foreword by the author.

A stranger in a deserted parking lot offers to help carry a woman's groceries. Is he a good Samaritan or is he after something else? A fired employee says "You'll be sorry." Will he return with a gun? After their first date, a man tells a woman it is their "destiny" to be married. What will he do when she won't see him again? A mother has an uneasy feeling about the nice babysitter she's just hired. Should she not go to work today?

These days, no one in America feels immune to violence. But now, in this extraordinary groundbreaking book, the nation's leading expert on predicting violent behavior unlocks the puzzle of human violence and shows that, like every creature on earth, we have within us the ability to predict the harm others might do us and get out of its way. Contrary to popular myth, human violence almost always has a discernible motive and is preceded by clear warning signs.

Through dozens of compelling examples from his own career, Gavin de Becker teaches us how to read the signs, using our most basic but often most discounted survival skill - our intuition. The Gift of Fear is a remarkable, unique combination of practical guidance on leading a safer life and profound insight into human behavior.

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Product Details

File Size: 531 KB
Print Length: 352 pages
Publisher: Gavin de Becker (January 20, 2010)
Publication Date: January 20, 2010
Sold by: Amazon Digital Services, Inc.
Language: English
ASIN: B0036Z9U2A
Text-to-Speech: Enabled

X-Ray:

Enabled

Word Wise: Enabled
Lending: Enabled
Enhanced Typesetting: Not Enabled
Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #3,876 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
- #1 in Books > Self-Help > Abuse
- #1 in Kindle Store > Kindle eBooks > Health, Fitness & Dieting > Counseling & Psychology > Mental Health > Sexual Abuse
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Customer Reviews

1,452

4.6 out of 5 stars

5 star		76%
4 star		15%
3 star		5%
2 star		2%
1 star		2%

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450 of 466 people found the following review helpful

A book that dispells crime prevention myths

By Arnold Howard on September 11, 1999

Format: Mass Market Paperback

Few crime prevention experts emphasize intuition. Instead, they talk about staying alert to crime. Sometimes crime prevention experts generate more fear than they alleviate.
Gavin deBecker, on the other hand, makes intuition and freedom from fear the focus of his philosophy. Instead of imagining the bad things that could happen, he says, live without worry of crime.
He also says to stop watching the news. It only generates needless worry and gives one a distorted view of the world. I have been teaching these same concepts for years as a black belt in karate, so it was refreshing to read them from someone else. I avoid newspapers and TV news--it only darkens our view of the world. It only makes crime seem worse. Give up news for two weeks and notice how your outlook improves.
As a teacher of women's self-defense, I've heard many stories of intuition. Some people call it the "back ground music," because it is like the music that plays in a movie before something bad happens.
As deBecker writes, act upon your survival signals (run, search your house in the middle of the night, stay away from an individual, etc.), even if you feel foolish doing so.
Shed the fears in your life, because fear clouds the survival signals. Those who live in fear of crime are already victims.
Some of the book is difficult to read, such as chapters on child abuse. But the book is still worth it. Buy copies for yourself and friends. If you spend time worrying about crime, this book could change your life.

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166 of 172 people found the following review helpful

Recognize and dump a manipulator!

By A Customer on March 8, 2002

Format: Mass Market Paperback

This book recently helped me to recognize the manipulative tactics of a man I dated one time, and it showed me the most effective way to dump him before getting sucked into a bad relationship. Repeatedly discounting the word "no", even in small matters; typecasting; attempted loansharking; deceptive and self-serving charm; and unwarranted persistence were all warning signs of a bad dating situation.
The chapter "I was trying to let him down easy" provides an effective method to end a no-win situation quickly and without guilt. The strategy: Tell him explicitly that you have decided to not go out with him again. (Do not use the word "date"; he may counter-offer and suggest "going out as friends" instead. Then you are still stuck with him.) Do not offer reasons why. Do not negotiate. Your reasons are your business; his only interest is in your final decision. Cease contact, and do not respond to any attempted contact by him.
This technique may appear cold; certainly, it isn't warranted in every breakup. Recognize, though, that manipulators have honed a strategy that advances their interests with little regard to your well-being. Don't feel sorry for them. They know what they are doing. With this book, you are better equipped to see them realistically and rid them from your life before they cause real damage.

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323 of 343 people found the following review helpful

The Gift Is Within You

By Mary Esterhammer-Fic VINE VOICE on February 11, 2004

Format: Mass Market Paperback

When a young relative of mine was vacationing, a stranger grabbed her by the arm and said, "Come with me or I'll kill you." She reacted instinctively and broke free, and as she ran she expected to be shot at any second. But she made it to safety and provided the cops with a good description.

One year later and 100 miles from where that happened, another little girl was grabbed by a stranger, who said something to her--this was captured on videotape. The frightened child, instead of fleeing, cooperated. She was later murdered by her abductor.

I think most of us fall into that second category, because we don't listen to the instinct to run, or to fight, or to (best of all) avoid those situations in the first place. We've been trained to suppress those very instincts that exist to preserve our lives.

What deBecker's book so expertly does is re-train us to listen to our intuition, to scope out our environment and everyone in it, and to read the danger signs we would otherwise prefer to ignore.

Panic and anxiety are not useful emotions; fear is different. Fear is what compels us to take action if there is a clear and present danger; it's what allows us to see what's happening and respond appropriately. It's an emotion that should be nurtured instead of conquered. We don't want our kids to grow up afraid of the boogeyman, scared to go out of their homes or try new things or meet new people. De becker teaches us that, instead, if we develop and learn to trust our intuition, we can free ourselves from that trap, just as we can react positively if we are ever in a position that requires immediate escape.Read more ›

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145 of 153 people found the following review helpful

Better than the book

By G. Lawton on June 3, 2006

Format: Audio CD Verified Purchase

I found this 2 tape set, narrated by the author, to be superior in many respects to the longer book. First, given the limited time available, the points made about crime avoidance are reduced to their essential elements. Second, the author is a convincing narrator, who brings passion and the abhorence of violent crime to his subject. In particular, the author's narration of the crime described in the opening pages of the book, and the victim's instinctive reliance on the "gift of fear" which saves her life, is riveting. While the book is worthy of a careful read, the taped version is an excellent condensation. Buy it, if not for yourself, for your sons, daughters, cousins, nieces, and nephews.

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Most Recent Customer Reviews

Everyone Must Read This!

Excellent book from someone who really knows what he is talking about. So glad I read this. There is way too much fear in the world and much of it is being created by the media,... Read more

Published 16 hours ago by Katrina

Anti-gun book, primarily focusing on stalker, work-place and domenstic...

After seeing this book recommended in several places, I purchased the book looking for useful everyday information to share with my family on avoiding crime and violence. Read more

Published 1 day ago by Marco Forcone

Past this along to everyone you know.

This is a very clear and easy read that points out many thing people do everyday that can, and in many cases does lead to their demise. Read more

Published 1 day ago by Sgt D.

I highly recommend this book and it deserves 10 stars if I ...

I was blown away by this book! In my opinion this should be a book that is required in all high schools/colleges! Incredibly informative and educational, for women and men alike. Read more

Published 3 days ago by Bruce Gilliam

Very good read.

Good book. My husband and I both enjoyed it.

Published 3 days ago by Christy

Understand what your inner voice is telling you about your...

If you're interesting in understanding your inner voice, that intuitive feeling or that sixth sense, than you'll most likely appreciate this book. Read more

Published 5 days ago by Amazon Customer

Five Stars

Lots of good info!

Published 5 days ago by SK

useful

Very useful. It helped me think about the security issues one doesn't always think about.

Published 6 days ago by 5toomany

Five Stars

A great read and some important lessons. This book is pretty old but the lessons still hold true.

Published 7 days ago by Regina Collins

Understanding unconscious signals - Must have book

Absolute must have book for everyone. Have you ever experienced a sense of something that you couldn't quite place or have a "gut feeling" or feel the hair on the back of... Read more

Published 9 days ago by Robert L. Gray

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