The Gift of Shyness: Embrace Your Shy Side and Find Your Soul Mate [Paperback]

Alexander Avila (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: January 1, 2002

This surprising and heartening celebration of shyness explains why shy people have a decided advantage in the search for romance, and shows how to make the most of a gentle introverted inner nature. Reversing the common belief that shyness is a liability when looking for love, psychologist and relationship expert Dr. Alexander Avila argues that a shy nature enhances the appeal of men and women alike and is often the key to creating lasting relationships at any age. Avila identifies the seven innate characteristics that make shy people stand out from their extroverted chohorts - sensitivity, loyalty, listening, reflection, modesty, mystery and gentleness - and teaches readers how to make the most of them in romantic encounters. In an innovative, step-by-step program, Avila provides a blend of improvisational acting techniques and theatre games designed to help shy people integrate their spontaneous sides (the Actor) into the self-conscience, self-reflective style (the Observer) that comes naturally to them.

Editorial Reviews

Review

Gregory J. P. Godek author of 1001 Ways to Be Romantic A gift to the millions of shy people. -- Review

From the Publisher

"A revolutionary approach to help shy singles accept who they are and take the right steps toward romantic fulfillment."--Dr. John Gray, author of Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus

"A new prescription for dating loneliness . . . attract the love of your life."--Dr. Harville Hendrix, author of Getting the Love You Want

"A gift to the millions of shy people."--Gregory J.P. Godek, author of 1001 Ways to be Romantic

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Paperback: 256 pages
• Publisher: Fireside (January 1, 2002)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0743200756
• ISBN-13: 978-0743200752
• Product Dimensions: 8.3 x 5.4 x 0.7 inches
• Shipping Weight: 8 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (5 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,137,389 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

20 of 20 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Finally, a book that values shyness, February 14, 2002

By A Customer

This review is from: The Gift of Shyness: Embrace Your Shy Side and Find Your Soul Mate (Paperback)

This is about the best book I have read on shyness,
focussing on all the gifts and wonderfulness of
shyness rather than on how to change oneself.

The paradox is that when one accepts their sensitivity
as a positive trait, their shyness naturally transforms
into an attractive way of being.

Unlike other books that assume that your shyness has
to be changed and is something to be ashamed about or
overcome, Dr. Avila shows how one can really
learn to love themselves as they are and use their
natural trait to best advantage.

19 of 22 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Unique but Misleading, July 28, 2002

By 

SammyJ (San Diego, CA USA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: The Gift of Shyness: Embrace Your Shy Side and Find Your Soul Mate (Paperback)

This book opens with a long introductory section about how wonderful it is to be shy. Ironically, rest of the book is dedicated to many and varied techniques to explain how you must become extroverted.
But you can't blame the book for this reality. There are a lot of interesting methods, some of which are nonesense or not sufficiently explained, and some of which are very clever and unique.
I definitely recommend this book, but just don't expect it to deliver the miracle you've been waiting for: a way to meet people without developing a signifcant social presense.

11 of 12 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars At Last!!!, October 22, 2004

By 

L.D. Mit (Los Angeles, CA United States) - See all my reviews

This review is from: The Gift of Shyness: Embrace Your Shy Side and Find Your Soul Mate (Paperback)

As a shy person myself, I've heard all the comments from well-meaning, but clueless, individuals about "getting over" my shyness. I've also read a lot of books on the subject, but this is the first one that truly GETS IT!!! Shyness is NOT a disease! Shyness is NOT something to conquer or overcome! Avila understands that shyness is simply a part of one's personality. Other books try to deal with this issue, but come off as very condescending with their advise on how to "get out there and meet people!". No wonder so many of us spend years believing we're not normal! This book addresses that and so much more. It shows the many facets of shyness, and how it's viewed in our society and others. But mainly, it invites you to understand exactly why shyness should be embraced as a gift. The advise here is realistic, yet fun, because the focus is on nurturing aspects of your personality that already exist, not changing yourself. Avila tells the truth and gives techniques that encourage growth. Forget all those other books on shyness, this is the only one you need!