Customer Reviews

The Gift of Shyness: Embrace Your Shy Side and Find Your Soul Mate

5 star:		(3)
4 star:		(1)
3 star:		(0)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

This is about the best book I have read on shyness,
focussing on all the gifts and wonderfulness of
shyness rather than on how to change oneself.

The paradox is that when one accepts their sensitivity
as a positive trait, their shyness naturally transforms
into an attractive way of being.

Unlike other books that assume that your shyness has
to be changed and is something to be ashamed about or
overcome, Dr. Avila shows how one can really
learn to love themselves as they are and use their
natural trait to best advantage.

This book opens with a long introductory section about how wonderful it is to be shy. Ironically, rest of the book is dedicated to many and varied techniques to explain how you must become extroverted.
But you can't blame the book for this reality. There are a lot of interesting methods, some of which are nonesense or not sufficiently explained, and some of which are very clever and unique.
I definitely recommend this book, but just don't expect it to deliver the miracle you've been waiting for: a way to meet people without developing a signifcant social presense.

As a shy person myself, I've heard all the comments from well-meaning, but clueless, individuals about "getting over" my shyness. I've also read a lot of books on the subject, but this is the first one that truly GETS IT!!! Shyness is NOT a disease! Shyness is NOT something to conquer or overcome! Avila understands that shyness is simply a part of one's personality. Other books try to deal with this issue, but come off as very condescending with their advise on how to "get out there and meet people!". No wonder so many of us spend years believing we're not normal! This book addresses that and so much more. It shows the many facets of shyness, and how it's viewed in our society and others. But mainly, it invites you to understand exactly why shyness should be embraced as a gift. The advise here is realistic, yet fun, because the focus is on nurturing aspects of your personality that already exist, not changing yourself. Avila tells the truth and gives techniques that encourage growth. Forget all those other books on shyness, this is the only one you need!

Dr. Avila's book, The Gift of Shyness, is truly a Gift in itself.
This Brilliant creation has changed my life! By applying the techniques I learned from the book, I have been able to develop my "Inner Actress"(The Queen) and minimize my "Observer"(Thought Demon). The quality of my relationships, not only with members of the opposite sex, but friends, family and co-workers has been greatly enhanced and are much more satisfying. I highly recommend reading this book. It is fun, easy to read and understand. Reading this book and following it's instructions has tranformed me into a much happier, more peaceful and serene person. If you are shy, this is the book for you!

I agree wholeheartedly with the premise of "The Gift of Shyness" -shyness is a positive not a negative condition and shy people everywhere have something to offer the world -- sensitivy and intelligence. That's the good of the book. The problem is a lack of depth and too much repetition. I couldn't finish the book due to the writing style. It sounds like it was written for middle school kids.