Customer Reviews

The Gifted Adult: A Revolutionary Guide for Liberating Everyday Genius(tm)

5 star:		(16)
4 star:		(5)
3 star:		(3)
2 star:		(4)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

"The Gifted Adult" is an excellent book, and provides one of a few lone voices drawing attention to "A Group Society Would Rather Pretend Doesn't Exist:" The Gifted Adult.

Adult Giftedness is one of the "Ugly Stepchildren" in the field of Psychology. Whereas researchers, psychologists and society in general go to great lengths to study, understand and help those who dwell a long way below the mean intellect, those living their lives an equal distance the opposite side of the mean often find themselves living in a void of confusion, misunderstanding-- and misinformation. Their lives are perhaps complicated by a "split personality" support system that provides tools and special programs to gifted children, but then vanishes into thin air once the gifted individual is deemed "Adult"-- in some cases providing an abrupt perception change from giftedness as having positive "value" to suddenly being a reason for discrimination and sneers.

Gifted Adults are "statistical outliers." As such, they often have special issues, living in a world whose actions are centered around accommodating the "norm." At best, a Gifted Adult seeking to have his/her needs understood, may hear the words "Well, we're ALL gifted, in our own special way." At worst (and more frequently) they will hear "How can you have problems, if you're so smart?"-- words that reflect a popular view that giftedness is a "privilege" that exempts a person from having any difficulties in life. Yet, Gifted Adults discover that working harder, seeking answers, seeing therapists and trying to contribute often leaves them with a sense of "emptiness" and lack of fulfillment.

Mary-Elaine Jacobsen's book is a much-needed tool to help gifted adults understand themselves, and accept the fact that their brains work a little bit differently. Real differences, I might add, that change the way a gifted person views their interactions with the world, their road to self-actualization, or considerations for seeking therapy.

In Part I of the book, Jacobsen starts to define her own view of giftedness, and addresses some of the Societal Myths (Giftedness = High IQ), and influences (Gifted adults' tendency to deny their giftedness) established by conventional thinking.

In Part II, she presents her alternative theory for measuring giftedness-- a broad system she has named "Evolutionary Intelligence" (or EvIQ). Although Jacobsen "borrows" heavily from the "Multiple Intelligences" theory originally set forth by Howard Gardner at Harvard, she adds a number of new facets, presented in a 240-item "self quiz" in Chapter 7 of the book. Unlike "standard" IQ tests, this is NOT a timed exercise with "right" and "wrong" answers, but rather a self-evaluation. Of course, honest self-scrutiny is central to obtaining a "valid" result-- which may present difficulty for some.

Part III explores most of the common "misunderstandings" gifted adults encounter in their interactions with daily life. Topics include "self mis-diagnoses;" the issues associated with "Failing to Fit In;" rewriting personal history and past events through understanding "common criticisms" often heard by gifted adults ("Can't you just stick with ONE thing?" "Where do you get those wild ideas?" "Can't you just slow down?"); the "False Self" and dumbing yourself down; as well as the "Impostor Syndrome" gifted adults often experience.

Parts IV and V offer a series of tools and possible solutions to help gifted adults reorient their energies in an effort to create lives that let them be "true to themselves"-- while still fitting into the "normalcy" of their surroundings. In part IV, Jacobsen explores both career issues and personal relationships, however, I found this section to be a bit general and "pep-talkish." The final section deals with summarizing and then applying the lessons learned in the book.

Observations: My general inclination is to say " Buy this book! Buy it NOW! Read it! Learn!"

However, the potential reader should understand just what the book will do for them. "The Gifted Adult" (Formerly published under the name "Liberating Everyday Genius"-- the name change is a GOOD idea!) is long on presenting Jacobsen's theory of Evolutionary Intelligence, and long on providing self-understanding for the gifted adult-- but somewhat short as a "How-To" guidebook on how to live life. If you're looking for "connect A to B" solutions, you'll find only a limited number here.

The author is also quite "liberal" with her use of the designation "gifted." Normally, the term is used to describe approximately 2% of the population. Jacobsen's definition may include as many as 10%-- and whether this is merely a technique to sell more books, or a figure backed by scientific research, I do not know. It doesn't detract materially from the value of the information presented-- but at times the writing does become a little bit "fluffy" and lacking in focus.

Some personal thoughts (Caveats): Society is engaged in a long-term love affair with the idea of "pathologizing" any behavior not tightly clustered around a narrow definition of "Normal." Incorrectly diagnosing and medicating giftedness as ADHD or Bipolar Disorder responds to a popular need for "A Quick And Easy Fix." If AT ALL possible, we want a "magic pill" rather than "hard work." And whereas disorders certainly DO occur, Adult Giftedness-- and the psychological makeup specific to it-- is NOT a pathology.

Overall rating: Outstanding (9.5 bookmarks out of a possible 10), not only for the gifted adult and anyone living with a gifted adult, but the book also should be required reading for any psychologist/therapist who's been asked if they are "familiar with the psychology of Adult Giftedness."

In general, I found this book very enlightening. I differ in one respect from most of the "everyday geniuses" the author describes: early in life I was identified as having a high IQ. But my parents and teachers suffered from the misconception that this was an isolated trait and, in all other respects, I was a completely normal child. It was fine with them that I learned quickly, but the qualities that they found less agreeable (my determination, enthusiasm, sensitivity, and immensely wide variety of interests) were redefined as negatives: I was "stubborn," "unfocused," "hasty," "too emotional," and so on. Plus the ideals that I was supposed to achieve -- get straight A's in school, be quiet and well-behaved, specify a career goal and pursue it -- didn't appeal to me in the least; I didn't want an ordinary life, I wanted an extraordinary one. But I grew up believing that, by refusing to squeeze myself into the slots that society provided, I was "failing to live up to my potential."

It wasn't until recently that I learned that there's more to giftedness than a high IQ or a talent in a particular area. Palladino's "Dreamers, Discoverers, and Dynamos," Gardner's work on "multiple intelligences," and many other books point out that the gifted child's mind actually works differently: intensity, drive, and sensitivity are all part of the package (which Palladino characterizes as "divergent thinking"). But the dividing line between genius and ADD is a blurry one, and our educational system's emphasis on normality and conformity often leads to defining any "divergence" as pathological or, at best, as misbehavior.

This book is a great antidote to such thinking. The author gives a self-test that enables the "everyday genius" to identify his/her strengths and personality traits, and I found the results interesting. Also very helpful are the lengthy sections on redefining your supposed negatives as positives: you're not someone who needs to "slow down"; doing things quickly is normal for you. I was greatly reassured to discover that my burning desire to "make a difference in the world" didn't stem from arrogance (which more than one teacher had scolded me for), but was, rather, a typical part of the high-EvI package. Although I don't agree with all of the author's suggestions in the "self-help" chapters, I think she's making an important point: the "everyday genius" can live and work effectively in the world not by suppressing his/her strengths, but by practicing self-discipline to use these strengths in the service of a higher goal. Given the scarcity of books written specifically for gifted adults (rather than children), this book fills a great need, and does it well.

I have only one quibble with the book, but it caused me to rate it with four stars rather than five. The author says things like "studies have shown ...", but she almost never gives the references for these studies; the footnotes to the chapters rarely mention research at all. I realize that she's writing a "popular" book rather than a scholarly work, and that many of her conclusions are based on her experience with her clients rather than on scientific research. But I feel it would give her conclusions far more credibility if she backed them up with harder data.

This is a review of the book "Liberating Everday Genius" by Jacobsen; I'm not sure if this book is the same under another name or if this new book offers more than the older version previously published.

I read this book in hopes that it would actually teach me how to liberate my creativity and intelligence. Unfortunately, most of what it offers is mere information and theory regarding what "everyday genius" is and how to tell if you are one using a rather generic "test." It then goes on to dispel myths and stereotypes that most "geniuses" seem to experience. I know that I found a lot of myself in this book although I'm not sure I'd call myself a genius. Perhaps I overestimate what the term really means, thus fitting in to the descriptions she gives of how society pushes down anyone who thinks differently than the majority. Sadly, none of my big questions were answered such as, "how do I overcome this programming?" I am just as confused and feel just as alone as I did prior to reading the book, so I can't say it has been any help to me except to point out that maybe there are others out there like me. What's the point if I still feel too lost to find them and to express my "true" self? Much of the material is repetitive in that she presents the same ideas and concepts over and over again. I assume she's trying to drill it into the head of the reader, but perhaps it's just book filler. I think she could have compacted the material into a book half the original size, thus lowering the price in the process. If you buy it, expect to be reading a Tony Robbins type self-esteem booster...do not expect to find real answers.

Throughout most of my 50 years of life, I have felt out of place. Like an alien being dropped upon this earth, I use a different vocabulary, have unusual bursts of energy, have a mind that travels at light speed, am highly reactive to external stimulus, and even sleep in a different pattern than most people. The labels given me are endless: too emotional, over-reacting, moody, anxiety disorder... even bipolar with hysterical mania, but without depression (the newest and my favorite!).

This book gave me great peace. I understand myself better now. With an IQ of 150 and a life-long creative (writer and artist), I am normal for me... and, there are others like me out there!

Those who are not "gifted," do not comprehend the lonliness or the anguish experienced by this misunderstood minority. I invite everyone to read this book, to gain insight into themselves, into loved ones, and/or into the world of the gifted.

Let us celebrate who we are, and the contributions we can give to society.

For someone who's gifted, Jacobsen's book can bring a sigh of relief and recognition. "I'm not an ugly duckling after all! I was meant to be a swan."

While some reviewers criticize this book as "elitist," I find the opposite. Jacobsen doesn't suggest that anyone be exempt from social norms or rules. To the contrary, she shows that the gifted may face a tougher challenge than the less-gifted: they must learn to accommodate to a society as an invisible often-resented minority group. It's up to each gifted person -- hopefully aided by mentors who can take advantage of "teaching moments" -- to learn to swim. That means adjusting a blunt style of speaking, communicating in a new style and, always, dealing with the loneliness of being "different." Gifted people tend to attract envy, not empathy, and they don't always grow into rich and successful adults. Indeed, without recognition early in life, the gifted can become severely depressed, mainly due to isolation.

Once you read this book, it's easy to recognize evidence of giftedness in yourself and others, including autobiographical accounts. A combination of characteristics -- sensitivity, high-speed, high-energy -- can appear frustrating to those who don't realize what's going on. Many gifted children get diagnosed as hyperactive, depressed, socially inept and worse.

I'm not overfond of pencil-and-paper tests, but Jacobsen offers ways to identify specific areas of giftedness through some simple questions. Readers can ignore this part if they choose.

Counselors, career coaches, therapists, managers, guidance professionals -- all should have this book on their shelves. When they find themselves getting overwhelmed by a gifted client, they need to know what's going on.

Mary-Elaine Jacobsen brings the largely invisible plights and possibilities of the gifted adult to our attention. As an intense, complex and driven gifted adult, myself, I truly appreciate her contribution to my life and the lives of others I know who've read the book. As a therapist to gifted adults for many years, Jacobsen knows what she's talking about and gives us many moving stories to find ourselves, our friends or our parents in. I cried many tears reading this book, remembering experiences in my own life and seeing them in a more self-compassionate light.

I've known I was smart, intense and driven but Jacobsen helped me to see why and what to do about it to have a happier, more fulfilled life. I'm probably writing this review right now because of the influence of this book. I've always craved to get my ideas out in the world and here on the Net and in my blog (tokerud's technology treats) I've sought out ways to do that. Jacobsen gives the gifted adult the good news and the bad news. The good news is great. I can forgive myself. The bad news is, that the only way things are going to change is for me to change some bad habits and be constructive and persistent in the world and express my gifts. If you know you are intense and driven and probably pretty smart, pick this book up. It could change YOUR life too.

This book is a well-written but occasionally dense read. However, it will be a page-turner for a gifted adult. And, for that matter, gifted adults tend to like dense books. One of the unfortunate facts that Jacobsen points out is that gifted adults have usually learned to keep a low profile about their giftedness. They've learned to cover it up and at a certain point in their lives, many gifted adults forget they are gifted. It is a convenient but, ultimately, very harmful defense mechanism. That's why I said earlier that if you merely suspect you might possibly be a gifted adult, read this book! It will shake you out of your unconsciousness and get you back on the track of getting your gifts out into the world where they belong!

I give this book three stars because everything the author says is right on the money. I did not give it 5 stars because the book is repetitious and the language rambling. I was really looking forward to reading this book, but I had trouble finishing it. I would have liked less preaching about liberating yourself and more insights on how to do it from examples of people who have done it. There are examples, but not as many as I would have liked, and not described in enough depth.

I gained more insights from "Gifted Grownups" by Marylou Kelly Streznewski. Her section about the physiology of giftedness, in particular, covered material I have not seen anywhere else.

In the end, how much you enjoy this book will depend much on how comfortable you are with your giftedness. If you have not become comfortable with being "different", you will probably value this book. If you are comfortable with the real gifted you, this is probably not the book for you.

I had to laugh at the editorial review, which accuses Dr. Jacobsen of being "elitist," one of the many criticisms that gifted people receive. Maybe that reviewer should have read the book more carefully. This is a terrific book that will help people realize their potential. That's a good thing for the world and should not be discouraged or belittled.

If you have struggled with fitting in only to feel like you cannot be your authentic self, this book will help you discover why. I also recommend "Dark Side of the Light Chasers" and other books by Debbie Ford to help you discover the damage done by all those messages to play small, and begin to heal, giving yourself permission to be BIG.

Imagine you owned a Ferrari Testarossa. Imagine that your Ferrari is the only car you will ever have. Now imagine that your Ferrari not only sets land speed records and wins road rallies, but has to be a daily commuter car, carry loads like a pick-up, handle deep snow like a SUV, and be the car that your kids learn to drive on. Now add to the mix that you *expect* your Ferrari to have the insurance rates, gas mileage, and maintenance requirements of the Honda Accords that everyone else has. Now imagine that you truly think your Ferrari is a Honda, and you're deeply, fundamentally distressed that it gives you so much pleasure but so many problems.

Welcome to reality as experienced by the Gifted.

The insights provided by the book were nothing less than a series of epiphanies for me. The author not only provides information around the fact that Giftedness has little correlation with high IQ, she also details the discrete set of personality characteristics typical of the Gifted, with a clear listing of the pitfalls and benefits derived from those characteristics. She explains how those "quirks" demand that Gifted people care for themselves in very different ways. She then goes on to dispel any myth that a Gifted person may have that they are "better" than non-Gifted people, while simultaneously providing encouragement to and insight into getting beyond the difficulties attendant with being a Ferrari in a Honda world.

If you are Gifted, work with,live with or love one, *please* read this book. It will make all your lives a lot easier. (And we're not quite as rare as you'd think!)

In an article in Advanced Development journal, Mary-Elaine Jacobsen noted the typical stereotypes of gifted people include the "temperamental artist, or the pathetic isolate whose brainy abilities are lost in foolishness, alcoholism or chronic depression," and the glittering superstar in the arts or sciences with talents elevating them [more or less effortlessly] to "an unreachable pedestal of human achievement."

One of the great values of her book is in showing how more ordinary people with exceptional abilities and sensitivities face challenges in, first of all, recognizing themselves, then realizing their multiple talents.

All too often, gifted adults [and children] get labeled as being problematical or pathological. Her book helps to better understand a range of gifted personality traits that can be embraced and used for living a more authentic and fulfilling life.