Gifts from the Unknown: Using Extraordinary Experiences to Cope with Loss & Change [Paperback]

Louis LaGrand (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: April 24, 2001

Louis LaGrand, who has had many years of experiences as a grief counselor, is a master at discerning the many ways in which after death communications come to the bereaved as well as people dealing with abuse, disaster, and trauma. In Western society we are taught to ignore such experiences, to laugh them off, and to deride those who take them seriously. But as LaGrand shows so well, they can serve as a very special aid in confronting the loss of a loved one in a unique and life-affirming way that in itself is growth producing. If I were to suffer a great loss, the first person I would turn to is LaGrand, from what I know of him from his three wonderful books. But he is only one person among millions of people in need. So he has done the next best thing: he has made his wisdom and experience available in this book. Because in compiling it he has drawn on all of his varied in-depth experiences and has organized and presented them only after long reflection, reading it may be even better than talking with him in person! Readers, even if they have not suffered a major loss, are likely to be grateful for the book because of the way it opens us to life as well as death. Don't be the one to pass it by. Rhea A. White Founder/DirectorExceptional Human Experience Network

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Louis E. LaGrand, Ph.D., is Distinguished Service Professor Emeritus at the State University of New York and is known world-wide for his research on the extraordinary experiences of the bereaved. He is a certified grief counselor and one of the founding members of the Hospice of St. Lawrence Valley. Currently, he is Bereavement Coordinator at Our Lady of Lourdes Church and Director of Loss Education Associates in Venice, Florida.

Product Details

• Paperback: 348 pages
• Publisher: iUniverse (April 24, 2001)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0595178693
• ISBN-13: 978-0595178698
• Product Dimensions: 9 x 6.1 x 0.8 inches
• Shipping Weight: 1.4 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (1 customer review)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,712,368 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

24 of 24 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars You Must Read This Extraordinary Book, May 9, 2002

By 

C. Shook "msshrink" (Pawcatuck, CT United States) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Gifts from the Unknown: Using Extraordinary Experiences to Cope with Loss & Change (Paperback)

Louis LaGrand recently lectured in Portland, Oregon at a large gathering of professionals specializing in death and dying. Some keynote speakers were quite conservative while others, like Dr. LaGrand, risked being "outside the comfort zone" with his refreshing views on continuing a bond with someone we love, even after they have died. Contrary to the stereotyped goal most grief counselors seem to harp on about "letting go and moving on", LaGrand has managed to very nicely reframe this into "Let go of the pain, hold on to the love, and continue your relationship with your loved one in a way that is healing while not being intrusive." Nice thought, huh?

An "extraordinary experience", according to LaGrand, is one that can range from actually encountering the dead person in a physical way (seeing them in the home), or, more commonly, in a dream or symbolic way (such as a group of cardinals appearing where they hardly ever do, and this happened to be the loved one's most treasured bird). His writing is compassionate and caring rather than cold and clinical and, not surprisingly, he opens the book by telling you that this is just as much for mourners to read as it is for those of us in the "death and dying business".

Readers may possibly find some of their core beliefs about what happens to us after we die being challenged, but just give LaGrand's alternative view a chance. I have already used his philosophy of NOT taking someone's grief away (or suggesting they need to move beyond the person they lost) and rewording it as a "loving energy that is fueled as much by love and yearning as it is by the possibility that he/she is very closeby." This should not be mistaken as a chip off of "Crossing Over" as LaGrand does not suggest we are clairvoyant nor are we necessarily capable of communicating with the spirit world, but, rather, only with the cherished few whom we miss terribly and feel there may be unfinished business with.

As a professional and also as someone who has experienced their own personal losses, Extroardinary Experiences was one in and of itself just reading the book. I also highly recommend it as a resource therapists share with their grieving clients - they deserve to have their grief not only validated and respected but to have it nicely labeled as "loving energy".