6 of 6 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars
One of the Best Indie Books of 2011, December 8, 2011
This review is from: Girl Over the Edge (Kindle Edition)
Girl Over the Edge, by Amy L Kinzer, Kindle Edition
Summary:
After Chloe and Beckett make a bad decision as a college party, they're dropped from top rung of the social ladder straight to the bottom. Beckett manages her way back into the outer skirts of her old circle of friends, while Chloe slips deeper into a depression and steps closer to the edge, both figuratively and literally. Chloe's obsession with Aurora Bridge--also know as Suicide Bridge--is growing, and Beckett is the only one who can stop Chloe from making the jump. But Becket's fear of remaining a social outcast keeps getting in the way.
Overall Impressions:
I LOVED this story. It's an addicting, fast-paced read that had me in tears by the time I reached the end of the story. Amy L Kinzer has a clear natural talent and a story worth sharing. Beckett's "voice" throughout the story really added to the tone of the novel, and I found it very fitting and an excellent way to convey emotion. There were also bits of humor sprinkled throughout thanks to Beckett's unenthusiastic enthusiasm towards things like Mom of the Year! and School Spirit! These things were poignant in a way, too, as we can see the juxtaposition between how Beckett used to view life and how she views it now, after The Incident.
There were some aspects of this novel that made it hard for me determine a star rating. While the author has a clear natural talent, there were some very basic skills that, if learned, would have taken the effect of her writing to the next level. There were errors in logic and continuity and repetitiveness that I felt any critique group would have spotted, and there were typos throughout, especially in the first half of the book. At some parts in the story, there were whole ends of paragraphs missing, sentences that made no sense, and completely incorrect words in the middle of sentences. (Think using the word "frog" when you mean "cafeteria"). Had this book been in the hands of a strong editor, I believe one pass for editing and one for proofreading would have been all it would take to make this book flawless. As it stands, there were times I felt this was a first draft.
To fairly rate this, I've decided to offer a more comprehensive star rating and give my overall star rating based on that.
Story: 5 Stars
This is one of the best stories I've read in a long time. A really long time. I haven't been this addicted to a read in I can't remember how long. It's definitely character-based, where the plot is found in the characters and not in what is happening around them. In some regards, I think this story would hold some merit as literary fiction if it'd been better revised and edited in the writing department.
Pacing: 5 Stars
Excellent. Even with all the repetitions in ideas and descriptions, the pace breezed right along. I don't know how long the story was, but it FELT like I was reading a novella. I didn't find any parts that lagged or bored me, which is saying a lot. I almost always feel that way, even with my favorite books (and with my own writing!). Not the case here. I don't know how many words this novel was, but it read quickly.
Voice: 4 Stars
As I said before, I found this voice overall pleasing. About 80% of the way through, however, there were a couple chapters in the a row that seemed overly repetitive and choppy in the style of the voice. Too much she did this, he did that, it did this, etc. A lot of this could have been fixed through critique also, especially if the author was working on the continuity and flow of her sentences.
Characters: 4 Stars
I thought Chloe and Beckett were brilliant characters. Even the parents in the story (specifically Chloe's Mom and Beckett's Mom and Dad) were well developed and believable. Sometimes some of the characters seemed to similar. Such as the way Chloe wouldn't take care of herself, and then Beckett's little brother wouldn't take care of himself. The parallels there, especially when those two chapters were so close together, really stuck out to me, especially as Beckett was saying the same things to both of them, which made the idea feel repetitive and the characters seem less unique to themselves. Emma as a character stood out to me also as being more of a plot device. I found it hard to understand why Beckett was accepted back into the group of friends but Chloe, who used to be even more popular than Beckett, wasn't. Why did Chloe get it the worst? Were her actions in the pictures taken more severe? I feel like there were some motivations unexplored here that would have made a few of these characters (and the story) more believable. A simple critique prior to publication would have caught this, I believe. Overall, though, the main characters were some of the best characters I've read in a long time.
Theme: 5 Stars
This novel is extremely TIMELY. I'd say it'd make some great required reading in both middle schools and high schools. The themes on struggling friendships, consequences for actions, bullying, peer pressure...these are all great topics to cover in a young adult book.
Continuity: 3 Stars
Overall, the story flows pretty well. There are times where ideas repeat or ideas skip around or things come up that weren't mentioned before (but are being spoke about like they were recently discussed) or ideas are mentioned but never resolved. One example of an idea that is never resolved is why Chloe is losing so much weight. I assumed anorexia. At one point, Beckett mentions knowing Chloe's secret, which made me think there was something more about Chloe (and like maybe her anorexia would later be revealed) but anorexia is never revealed nor do we find out what this "secret" was. Some of the scenes felt repetitive both in what happened and how things were described. I noticed this was really only a problem in a few chapters, not all of them.
Logic: 3 Stars
There weren't a ton of logic issues, but what was there really bugged me. For example, at the beginning of the story there's a girl going under a bridge on a sailboat. But then after that, we're told that it's concrete under the bridge and they walk down there. I tried and tried to visualize how it could be both, but I couldn't. If it could be both, a better description cue from the author would have helped. There were other logic issues throughout--little things that I feel a critique partner or critique group would have spotted. All of these would have be very easy to fix, should the author decide to make some changes and put out a second edition of this fabulous novel!
Dialogue: 4 Stars
Dialogue was something I barely noticed in this novel, perhaps because it was so flawless and natural. Toward the end, there were a couple awkward conversation where people said things I didn't think they would say or said things in unnatural ways that didn't feel true to the situation. In a few instances, there were also characters saying similar things in similar ways to the point their voices did mush together for that brief moment. But these really were anomalies compared to the rest of the dialogue in the book. To be honest, rarely do I see such natural dialogue in writing. It's a hard skill to master--this author must have a natural ear for it.
Setting: 4 Stars
Not a lot of time is spend on setting, but I think this is partly what keeps the pace moving along. There's enough to fill in the blanks and let the reader use their imagination. Sometimes what is described is a bit repetitive and some variation would have been nice. The sparse style really worked for this novel overall.
Writing: 3 Stars
I've mentioned a few things already in passing, but there were some other things about the writing I felt could have been improved. There were tense slips (past instead of present in a present tense moment.) There were missing words, typos, missing punctuation, and other proofreading errors. Also, I noticed the author saying "I nod my head" and "She waves her hand" and things like that a lot. This kind of overwriting can become redundant, not just because it's being used so frequently (sometimes 3 head nods in one scene) but also because of how it's worded. "She nods" is enough. "She waves" is enough. We know people nod heads and wave hands. Now, if they're nodding their feet or waving their nose, then the author might want to specify. Again, these are the kind of nit pics that are considered basics in writing. This is why I say the writer has such natural talent. She knows the stuff that can't be taught. Empower her with some basic writing skills, and watch out!
The Ending: 4 Stars
I feel that the wrap up chapter just barely missed the mark, though I liked the general idea. In some regards, more closure/explanation was needed, along with more hope for the future. Endings are always hard, though. The climax, however, was amazing and made me cry!
Closing Thoughts:
In the end, there were a few things that detracted from my reading (probably things that wouldn't bother your average reader!) but it didn't stop me from loving this novel. If those few things had been fixed, I'd have given this five stars. I hope this author can soon get a good critique group and a fabulous editor to help her novel reach her full potential. This is the kind of novel I would sign as an acquiring editor, as I can see the raw talent and untapped potential that would be oh-so-easy to bring to realization.
My overall rating at this time? 4 Stars
I'd recommend this novel to others, and I'd read more from this author.
Help other customers find the most helpful reviews
Was this review helpful to you? Yes
No
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars
Great story of teenage issues, August 23, 2011
This review is from: Girl Over the Edge (Kindle Edition)
I received a complimentary copy of this book in order to
review it. I would recommend this book to teenagers to read. It is a book about two high school girls
entering their senior year of high school. They did something they shouldn't have done, and it was captured
by someones cell phone, and sent to the entire school(altho it didn't tell you what they did,
till near the end of the book). The two girls became outcasts at school and everyone made fun of them.
This book talks about peer pressure, family situations, and suicide.
I enjoyed reading this book, and could see this as a problem for a lot of teens in this day and age, of facebook, twitter, and cell phones. It reminds us all
of be careful what you do, or the whole world will know.
Help other customers find the most helpful reviews
Was this review helpful to you? Yes
No
