Customer Reviews

Girl Wars

5 star:		(6)
4 star:		(1)
3 star:		(0)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

I picked this up after reading Rachel Simmons' "Odd Girl Out" (which was outstanding) and wanting to know how I could take action against social aggression as a teacher. This book did not supply the answers. First, it's aimed primarily at parents, with hardly any direct recommendations to teachers (in fact, it almost takes the view that teachers are not likely to be effective allies in the battle against social aggression). Second, it espouses a number of strategies that strike me as naive and counterproductive. In her book, Simmons took a much savvier tack, identifying approaches that are likely to convince picked-on kids that YOU JUST DON'T GET IT AT ALL. Dellasega and Nixon seem to me to overemphasize church communities as a retreat from aggression -- this strikes me as not only naive but dangerous, since so many social aggressors cloak their meanness behind a façade of impeccable niceness, and what better way to prove how nice you are than to belong to a church group? They also endorse an activity called "the PowHer Game," which sounded to me about as bright an idea as a Jumping to Conclusions Mat; to confirm my hunch, I ran it past my sister (whose own junior-high experiences prompted her interest in "Odd Girl Out" and, by extension, mine), and she said, yep, any kid would think that was hokey beyond belief, and not one would put an ounce of trust in it.

Somewhere, either in print or in someone's mind, there is a book that can help parents, teachers and kids resist social aggression effectively. I don't think this one is it.

As the dad of a teen girl who has gone through a lot of bullying I was nodding my head at the stories. Then I got to the chapter on Dads and Daughters and thought "At last!" This is the first concrete advice I've found on how to help my daughter. It's great to recognize that fathers play an important role too. One of my daughter's teachers read this, and is going to start a program at her school to stop relational aggression, so even more girls will benefit.

This book on female bullying is an absolutely wonderful. "Sticks and stones can break your bones, but words can break your heart." That's what female bullying would hurt girls deeply. This book is worth reading and there are some great take-home points. I really enjoyed the book and found it helpful. Only if I read it earlier!

I am a Senior Account Manager, and I have worked for Staples Contract Inc, for three years. The first year was simplistic without much complication other than it was a long drive to and from work. I then transferred to the Retail Account Management program to work with Rewards customers with another team. I was introduced to Marlo Lathan who was to become my tormentor on the job for the next two years. She is clever, beautiful and controls the team with her emotional abuse. I did not understand what was happening to me until I saw the news about girls bullying girls and they were filming it! They were sent to jail for beating a classmate. They filmed the beating and uploaded it on YouTube. I could not understand how, or why they would do such a thing to another child. I wondered to myself "does this stop?" Do we graduate from High School and does it end? I concluded from work experience with Marlo that it does not end. I reported her to my supervisor, and to human resources without success. I talked with her directly, and again, it merely got worse. What is one to do? This book teaches you the tools to deal with the bully in your class at school, and the co-worker who just will not stop. I simply wish I had this tool when I was a kid so I could have better identified and managed the problem long before I as an adult and thinking... I'm crazy... now, that I've read this book I would recommend it to anyone.

Good practical advice. Recommended for those who want some ideas of how to deal with relational aggression issues. I like this one much better than "Queen Bees..." as this is researched based, not speculative in its' advice and information. I would want every parent with girls to read this, as well as teens and adolescents themselves. It also has great vignettes by girls themselves, which my daughter could not stop reading once she started.

I am a school counselor at a small high school. This book is easy to read and had applicable ideas to implement.

This is the first book ever I read about bullying as it relates to relationship amongst females. It is important to mention that this book is focusing on teenage girls and bullying that occurs in middle schools. Book is combination of testimonials from youngs girls, their mothers, teachers and even fathers. Authors are emphasizing on various reasons for bullying such as jealousy, gossip, cliques and popularity contests.

It is painful to realize that both initiators of bullying and their victims are deeply wounded people. The lask of self-confidence and self-estime in perpetrators is being transferred to their victims who sometimes withdraw from educational system or become permanently emotionally damaged if not provided with adequate professional help.

Some of the examples presented in the book, apply to modern day workplace as well. It is valuable book for women of all generations to read, but also it is valuable handbook for fatehrs with daughters who are actively looking ot ease their daughter's transition into adolescence.

What I have learnt from this book is that the politically correct name for bullying is "relational aggression" (RA). No matter how it is called it is form of harrassment and it is ofter overlooked compared to sexual harrassment or racial/social harrassment. No matter how called it is unacceptable in society, school system and workplace.

This book is fabulous - just what I was looking for!! Every adult who works with young girls should read this book.