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Girlfag: A Life Told in Sex and Musicals Paperback – September 1, 2012


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Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Janet W. Hardy is the author or coauthor of ten groundbreaking books about relationships and sexuality, including The Ethical Slut (nearly 100,000 copies sold to date). She has traveled the world as a speaker and teacher on topics ranging from ethical multipartner relationships to erotic spanking and beyond, and has appeared in documentary films, television shows and radio showst. Janet's writing has appeared in publications as various as The Sondheim Review, Clamor, and EIDOS. She holds an MFA in Creative Nonfiction from St. Mary's College of California.

Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.

This is a book about dissolution, in all the senses of the word. Lawyers call a divorce a "dissolution,” and there's a divorce in here, although a rather anticlimactic one. And some people say you're "dissolute” if they think that you're morally not quite up to par, and, well, there's a lot of that in here too, mostly with me at its center. But "dissolution” is the noun form of the verb "dissolve.” Moviemakers use a "dissolve” to transition from one scene to the next, so that they can jump all around their story, sometimes to things that seem irrelevant at the time but that start to make more sense as the movie progresses. And physicists mean "dissolve” to mean the softening of edges, the loss of boundaries, the point where the lump of sugar becomes smaller and smaller, and then the sugar is liquid, and then the water is sweet. And that's really what this book is about: dissolving, dissolution, solution. Edges softening, edges disappearing, edges so far gone that you realize they never existed and that you're standing like Wile E Coyote in midair. Don't worry, you'll only fall if you think too much about how you got there in the first place.
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 192 pages
  • Publisher: Beyond Binary Books (September 1, 2012)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 193812300X
  • ISBN-13: 978-1938123009
  • Product Dimensions: 5 x 1.5 x 8 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (8 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,234,624 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

6 of 6 people found the following review helpful By David M. Ortmann on October 20, 2012
Format: Paperback
In Girlfag: A life told in Sex and Musicals, Janet Hardy is unapologetically herself. Fierce, incisive, and witty, Hardy challenges us to think about gender and sexuality outside of the boxes we've become used to - and perhaps cling to - with candor and tenderness. GirlFag breaks new ground in spirit and thought and is just another well-crafted reason to celebrate, yet again, one of the foremost voices in sexuality, gender, and queer thought.
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5 of 5 people found the following review helpful By David Amos on October 26, 2012
Format: Paperback
Girlfag" was tender, moving and well-written. I really liked was the ways it made me think about things I had thought were immutable - gender and orientation, who we are and what we want. Recommended for anyone who's ever felt an unnamable desire, or maybe anyone who just wants to read a really good memoir.
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful By Karen60 on October 16, 2012
Format: Paperback
Girlfag; A life told in Sex and Musicals by Janet Hardy is fun, easy and entertaining to read. It offered me a peek inside the life of a woman who has the courage to be herself and provided me with insight into what it means to be a Girlfag. The following passage describes my reading experience perfectly, "...a softening of edges, the loss of boundaries, the point where the lump of sugar becomes smaller and smaller, and then the sugar is liquid, and the water is sweet".
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By TammyJo Eckhart VINE VOICE on December 30, 2013
Format: Paperback
If you don't know who Janet Hardy is and you consider yourself kinky or identify with an alternative sexuality you need an education. Janet has been a force of information and insight, empowering readers with her own work and the works of others through her editing and publishing careers.

You would barely know that from this memoir however because most of her work as an educator and publisher is brushed over. That is a problem with this book. Hardy spends a decent amount of time on her childhood, teens, young adult life and even her first marriage but the later part of her lift is only covered in bits and pieces.

The musicals are interwoven well though not as much as I expected given the title; the same for the sex but that is part of the book's point -- sex (and gender) is not what you think, it is not what we are taught and told.

The glimpses into Hardy's life created frustrations for me personally. I wanted to know more, a lot more, than what she covers often in very short chapters or sections (ranging from one to six or so pages) especially about how she got into the kink community and became known as an expert and respected publisher -- are those connected to her sexual/gender identity and if not, why not?

I hope she'll consider expanding this a lot if she ever revises it.

You should know that I have been published by Hardy twice and have had numerous conversations with her online and on the telephone but I have not met her face-to-face. I may have higher expectations because of this so please consider that when reading the above review.
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