Customer Reviews

The Girl's Guide to Homelessness

5 star:		(12)
4 star:		(12)
3 star:		(11)
2 star:		(15)
1 star:		(24)

 

 

I dearly LOVE my Kindle, but this is one of those times when I wished I'd bought this as an actual book, because that way I could resell the book and get a little of my money back.

I thought this book should have been entitled "The Girls Guide to Bad Choices." It really has very little to do with the realities of being homeless, and frankly I'm not sure that choosing an alternative living arrangement is tantamount to being homeless. Plenty of people choose to RV full time; they generally don't consider themselves "homeless." I've known people who camped on the beach for months who didn't consider themselves homeless.

I kept wanting to call her and ask her why she was spending her hard-to-come-by money on trips and other things, instead of socking a bit of cash away. I kept wanting to ask her why she didn't move someplace with a slightly cheaper cost of living than Orange County. I get why she chose not to live with family, but I thought the telling of her family story was melodramatic and over-the-top.

Finally, I didn't feel like this was very well written. Her work is, in my opinion, rife with cliches, and I just wonder how accurate her telling of some of these anecdotes really is. Judging from some of the things I've read today (which I wish I'd read before I bought this book, alas) there's some indication that this could be the latest "Million Little Pieces" moment of 2011.

I haven't read past the first chapter of this book but I do know the author. I'm not calling this book pure fabrication, but I also know enough to question it. My then girlfriend was room mates with Brianna when she had that job as an executive assistant. I know that her 6 months working as an executive assistant were not spent in a cottage by the beach. She lived with 3 other room mates in a house next to a man-made lake in the city of Lake Forrest California. I don't know why she was fired, but I do know that she called out sick once or twice a week. I don't know what her mother was like, but it was her mom that moved her stuff out of the house when she left. I don't know what she had against us, but she told the neighbors that we were physically abusing her and that she had to move for her own safety. Since she spent all of her time holed up in her room we didn't know what she was talking about, or why she was telling it to the neighbors, but she hadn't paid rent in 2 months and we were glad to finally look for a paying room mate. Again, lots of the stuff in this book probably happened in some form or other, but the parts I can corroborate don't jive with what happened. I wish her well and good luck, but it's hard to see something you know is not true without commenting. So, I hope the readers enjoy this book. Though I can't recommend it, I'm sure it's entertaining. Read with a grain of salt.

"The review for this is going to be hard to write" is what I wrote immediately after finishing the book. I have had a few days to digest it now but I am still unsure how to address my thoughts.
The Girl's Guide to Homelessness is a memoir from twenty something Brianna Karp. Abused and neglected as a child by her bipolar mother, Brianna grew up in a dysfunctional Jehovah's Witness family. Despite her truly shocking childhood circumstances, Brianna establishes herself as an independent adult, until redundancy and the current state of the economy, forces her back home to live with her mother and stepfather. Brianna is immediately victimised by her mother until in a nasty confrontation, Brianna is told to leave. With no where to go, Brianna tracks down her recently deceased biological father's trailer and moves into a Walmart carpark with her beloved dog. Starbucks' free WiFi allows her to keep job hunting and unemployment benefits keep her fed but it's a struggle to keep body and soul together in such soul crushing circumstances.
Briana Karp is to be commended for highlighting the face of homelessness that people would prefer to ignore. It is far more comfortable to blame homelessness on drug addiction, laziness or mental illness, than a combination of circumstances that could befall anyone, especially in times of global financial stress. For most people living payday to payday the thought is truly terrifying and so to push it away they choose to ignore the issue, and brand the 'homeless' with stereotypes. I have heard the complaints that Briana faced from those I know - wanting to know how do the homeless justify cell phones and laptops but it seems sensible to me that these are tools that in this age are essential for anyone seeking work, just as much as a good suit and access to transport. Brianna reminds us to that each homeless person has individual circumstances that led them to their situation and quite frankly no one is immune.
Had the memoir continued to explore these issues and Brianna's struggle to reestablish her life, this would have been a five star book for me. Karp writes with an honest and authentic voice and her tone is confiding rather than preachy. I think her style would particularly appeal to young adults, and she had the potential to become a role model for them.
Unfortunately the memoir slowly devolves as Karp's relationship with Matt becomes the focus. Obviously this relationship had a major impact on Brianna and this is her memoir, but the issues of her homelessness are pushed aside in favour of melodrama. The respect I had developed for her slowly ebbed away as she made Matt a priority in her life. Her independence suffered, her determination to improve her situation waned and it was frustrating. I couldn't help but be disappointed in Brianna's decision to buy an expensive first edition book as a gift for Matt, even while I recognise I don't have the right to judge her. There is no doubt her trip to Scotland is heartbreaking and I had sympathy for her, there is no doubt it is a sad story.
Personally though this entire drama left me disenchanted with the book, it wasn't what I wanted to know, or what I was expecting given the first half of the book. I almost felt deceived, even if that reaction seems unfair.
When I finished the book, I went to browse Brianna's blog but found that in the 18 months since the book's end Brianna has posted very rarely and has made little progress towards stability. I am both saddened and disheartened by that, she seems to be reveling in her status as a 'celebrity' homeless person, her initial goals forgotten. Of course there is still plenty of time for her to find her way. I truly wish Brianna the best and hope she takes full advantage of the opportunities she will get upon publication of this book to create a safe, secure and happy life for herself.
I do think The Girl's Guide to Homelessness should be read widely for the message she has about the issues surrounding dispossessed persons and the stereotypes it confronts. Yet I think several might share a similar opinion to mine on the second half of the book, so I recommend it with that caveat. In turns inspiring, heartbreaking and (over)dramatic, The Girl's Guide to Homelessness is compelling and confronting reading.

When I was eighteen, I was disowned by my family. For a year and a half the help and support of my friends was able to keep me afloat, until I lost my job, my lease ran out, and I had nowhere left to turn. After sleeping on a church floor for a week, I found my way into a more permanent shelter, where I spent the better part of the next year before getting a job and being able to move out. A year later, I'm scraping by. I am the same age as Karp, and when I saw the book in the supermarket, I was automatically pinged by the title. The first chapter or two (which I read there) were interesting enough for me to pick up the book with my groceries.

Now that it's done, I'm not sure what I think.

Don't get me wrong: I agree wholeheartedly that homelessness can vary wildly. In the shelter and in the church I met a huge range of homeless people: some who camped in the woods in the summer, some recovering from illness or addiction, some parents with children who couldn't bring 3-4 people into a friend's basement or couch. I met a father who quit his job and moved into the shelter to help support his ex and their children, a man who had been in and out of the shelter over the past few years, and one woman who had savings but was sick enough that she needed to keep them for medical expenses, and hope to apply for assisted living. There are all kinds of homelessness, and none is more or less legit than the other. As long as you don't have a place that is safe, with electricity, running water, and heat in the winter, and is ultimately your own? That's homeless. Park benches have nothing to do with it.

Likewise, I've been in the same situation as Karp as far as laptops and phones go: applying to jobs and using the shelter's address and phone number got me pointed looks and half questions from employers until I managed to get a Trackphone and PO box. A store manager once gave me a hard time for using and owning a laptop, not even believing I "could" be homeless for having one. Karp is absolutely right that even though these are things that can be sold, they're also "needs." My contact to my friends, my way to look for jobs, and hell, a way for me to watch movies and relax after a long day. In fact, in general, I found myself agreeing with Karp on her philosophies about the "rights" of homeless people: they are, in fact, allowed to relax and enjoy themselves and even (god forbid) spend a little money on themselves now and then. Everyone needs to relax.

But I couldn't bring myself to like the book. I wanted to! I really did! The early sections were fascinating in a morbid sort of way, a, "can this really be...? wow!", interest. But as the book came on, the events became more and more strained and implausible. Don't get me wrong: I fully believe Karp was homeless, and that the events in the book happened. I just don't know if we're getting the whole story here. It can be difficult and humiliating to own up to actions and mistakes, to be bluntly honest even when at fault. And I do not expect blunt honesty from a cheap paperback memoir, either. But Karp is never wrong. She is always the victim. The blameless victim. She is always calm, rational, intelligent, self-deprecating and witty. The book reads like she's telling the story of past events to friends--with big words and fancy turn of phrase that, while impressive, don't always sound natural, like how people really talk when she quotes dialogue--direct quotes, of course, as though this is exactly what was said. It's a story. From her point of view, with no self reflection or much awareness, but a lot of repressed anger and a lot of unconscious desire to appeal to her readers, get them on her side.

And in the end, the book just feels artificial.

Nor is it about homelessness.

Yes, she was homeless. But that's clearly not what the story is about. This isn't a story of a girl in a bad place getting her life back together--it's one of a girl in a bad place who falls for a guy, makes stupid decisions (again: spending some money on yourself, okay. flying your boyfriend half around the world and buying him a netbook? Umm, aren't you supposed to be saving for an apartment?), and ends the book relying entirely on the kindness of friends... and still homeless. There's nothing wrong with kindness of friends or even with still being homeless! But Ms Karp, whatever happened to all those job applications?

In the end, the book feels like an attempt to... well, capitalize on her situation. I don't mind this. When you're in a tough spot, do whatever you can. But in doing so, she presents an angry yet self-glorifying, highly biased story, that, while probably true never RINGS true. An interesting story about Karp's life, written by a girl desperate to impress her audience and prove she's a good person? Maybe. But a story about homelessness? Not at all.

I can't remember how I heard about Brianna Karp and her book. It may have been online, or on the radio, but either way, my wife and I were very interested in reading her story. I don't often read entire books in two days, but this one was initially captivating. But, the more I read, the angrier I became with Brianna, and by the end of the book, I was completely fed up with her and the book. So much so that my wife and I have decided to throw it away rather than give it to a thrift shop, which is normally what we do with books we are finished with.

The first issue is that this is not a guide to homelessness. It is a memoir. A blog bound in book form. I knew that going in, but be warned. There is virtually nothing, save for a few links to homeless organizations and support websites, that offers any assistance to anyone living on the streets. The fact that it is published by Harlequin should come as no surprise. It quickly transitions from "my screwed-up early life and how I became homeless" to "doomed sordid international internet romance". This is not the face of true "begging on the street, jobless, hopeless, hope the National Guard Armory is open because it's 40 degrees and raining, sleep on the library porch, cook every meal on the park barbeque" homelessness. This is the face of a twenty-something girl, who like many of us, has made some really bad choices, both before and during her ordeal as a homeless person.

The second issue is that even though this book has only been out for a couple of months, there is already some backlash in the form of displeasure directed at Brianna for some of the choices she has made with the apparently very limited money she has. I understand as well as anyone that sometimes in life, you are left with just what you can carry. Homes are lost, cars are lost, belongings are lost, and you keep what is most valuable. I don't begrudge Brianna for having a laptop, as some short-sighted readers do. What I do question are multiple international trips for her and her boyfriend. No truly homeless person would ever consider such an extraordinary expense. Many even reasonably-secure people don't, especially in the worst economic environment in decades. It makes me question the reason for the book, as well as all the reasons she claims to be homeless. It makes the book a lie.

The third issue is the dubious nature of her claims. Right here on Amazon, a reviewer claiming to know Brianna casts doubt on the claim that she had a "cottage by the beach". She seems to have had the worst childhood ever recorded, complete with physical, sexual, and mental abuse. She claims to have been responsible for driving her sister around well before the age that she could actually have even a learner's permit, she claims to have "entered the workforce to support her family" at age 10, and the list goes on. Through all of this, she has a love-hate relationship with her mother, who in between beatings and abuse, finds time to go shopping with her.

What drew me to this book is that it is timely, (it supposedly happened over the last three years), it is local to me (right under my nose, as we may have even unknowingly crossed paths), and it's relevant (many people are way closer to homelessness than they think, like maybe one paycheck away).

What I want to see is third-party verification of every claim she makes, from every employer mentioned, every person mentioned, every WalMart or Starbucks employee, every relative, and every person who has come in contact with her during these years. Because what I fear is going to happen is another "A Million Little Pieces" scandal that duped Oprah. Until then, this book is nothing more than a "based on a true story" pulp fiction novel, and it is at best a very one-sided version of a story that obviously has a very big, very important other side to it.

I read about The Girls Guide To Homelessness in PEOPLE magazine and was looking forward to picking it up. The idea, I thought, was interesting enough and the book was made to sound like it would be quick read. I finished the book in a single night, mostly because I couldn't wait to write this review, but felt in order to do so, I owed Brianna a fair shake at things.

This book should have been have been written in three parts: Belief, Suspicion of Disbelief and Total Disbelief.

I harbored a feeling, a strong feeling at that, that most of this book is written from Brianna supposed reality, and I highly doubt most of it is actual reality. A lot has been made about fictions claims and stories in the books--and I'm guessing that is probably the only nonfiction thing about this story.

Brianna claims to be homeless, and yes, by definition she is without a stable home ergo homeless. But she far, far, far and away from the image of a woman sitting curbside asking for change. She's not that by a mile and a half. She works really hard to sell you on why her version of homeless is still legit, despite having money enough to fly her online boyfriend around the world 4 times, own a Blackberry cell phone, a neo mastiff and 2 cars, oops...lets not forget her trailer. Brianna tries, and fails, to justify these actions by pull the old "poor little me" excuse to explain away various expenses she occurs in the pursuit of wooing her man.

There are moments where you'll feel for this girl, of course. If this story even harbors 1/10th of truth, that's a real shame. But she's also an active and willing participant in making poor decisions, al a, taking her unemployment, when she's to broke to buy food mind you, to fly her boyfriend to the US for an extended "sex and getting to know you" vacation. Those tickets aren't cheap and that same money could go far spent in practical ways.

I have no doubt Brianna struggles, be it from her circumstances or free will, but the reader will have a hard time reconciling the two. If it wasn't for bad luck, Brianna would have none and so I wish her the best and hope she can realign her priorities so she can get back her life.

I thought this book would be along the lines of "Where the Heart Is" but I was completely wrong. The book starts off on a tangent and continues as such, barely promising to touch on the subject in the book's title. As I made my way through the memoir (using the term loosely), I discovered I was reading a melodramatic account of an immature girl who has somehow managed to get a publisher to print her one-sided diary.

There was some aftertaste that I did not like, and it was obvious that the false presentation of her account set the unsettling tone until its end. This was no homeless life, and everybody knew it including the author herself. It was just a matter of attention the title of homelessness could capture. I bet I am not the only one to have been drawn to this book by its title just to find such a false ad the book seemed to be promoted by. Her book was apparently received with this type of question as she herself mentioned on the radio show that I caught, too. If that was why she seemed to be so apologetic or had to compulsively make excuses, then, the title should have been revised, for there is more to a book than its marketing strategies and sales: the moral a book conveys, and it has to do with a series of conscious choices one is committed to make in his/her account. In this regard, I found this book questionable after all.

This is more about the author's suddenly downsized and downgraded life, and her 'gutsy approach' to 'rise above again', or put any cliche in the blank, anything but homelessness. Therefore, calling her life homeless was too much exaggeration as well as unethical given the real homeless population's real predicament she was nowhere near. When I heard her claim this actually helped reaching out the 'real' homeless population, it seemed a bit arrogant of her while she capitalized and monopolized the 'presentable and likable' homeless girl. That is the marketing strategy she chose way before she got down to this book, so I was curious if it was pathology that seemed to attract her the condition of homelessness.

I was personally intrigued by the author's insider account of JW, but even this made me feel guilty for its unsound connotation of the organization's almost official link to the harrowing life styles one after another. I enjoyed reading this part and found it unexpectedly worthwhile the most: the dots of social problems were somehow connected all together-- if loosely and irresponsibly--the generations of the cult community, the abused and the runaways, the poor, the marginalized-- all by demonized JW. Is this what made her aspire to cash her turbulent life in? If so, I am afraid that it is pathological enough.

After going through the account, though, I thought I could summarize what was the oddest in her account: the book continuously insists how the author was free from the mental desease and crazy life styles she claimed were running in the family. If that was what she was running away from with all her might and determination, then, why did she still think of playing with the concept and life styles that she had sworn off? That part only appears to be not only ill but also illogical had it not been for her sophistication of how to benefit people's pity for those who are underprivileged. Why would she want to play with the concept of homelessness when she really was neither nor wanted to be one? That really is a dangerous path given it could lead her to supposedly unwanted consequences, and I bet what happened in Scotland was inevitably one. She was putting herself into the condition believing the best way to get the unreliable boyfriend's attention back was to pretend homeless. Also, if having a trailer house were equivalent of being homeless, then, didn't it ever occur to her that it could be doubly insulting to those who live in trailer houses as well as people who do not even have trailers? To my understanding, owning a trailer could be such an asset, let alone those who have ones are considered to be anything but the homeless population.

The book lacks depth in analysis and integrity, and in that sense, is even infantile. Yet, since youth is the major feature of the appeal to the major audiences, lots of readers actually might like it instead of questioning it. Personally, the shallowness was the determinate factor for me to rate as it is.

First, I think it is important to get one thing out of the way: this is not a guide for homeless people looking for tips on how to get by - even though there IS a list of resources at the end of the book. But the focus of this book isn't about using those resources or where and how to find help. It is simply one person's revealing take on her life after she was laid off from a job where she'd worked for a relatively short period of time. Yes, her salary was $50,000 but c'mon...this happened in California and she didn't have time to save much after paying rent and other living expenses. Not before losing her job. Not after depending on unemployment after that job loss, with those funds often arriving sporadically.

Also, please see the bottom of this review to see how the book is basically divided into three parts, each focusing on another aspect of Brianna's life, with plenty of overlapping events.

Did Brianna always make the best decisions before or after being laid off? Even she questions that and perhaps she'd have done things differently....if only she'd known what was about to happen.

More about the content of this book in a second. But since the publication of The Girl's Guide to Homelessness: A Memoir (emphasis on "memoir;) Brianna has had articles written about her and there have been plenty willing to slam her. But hey...this is written by a 23 year old! She didn't have courses about how to deal with the consequences of unemployment. Also, based on what Brianna wrote, she had a very odd family situation (and that is an understatement). We are all products of our backgrounds and they affect us until we gain more insight along the way and hopefully move in different directions. Brianna decided to do just that rather than remain trapped in a lifestyle that was leading nowhere and was tapping out whatever money she did have.

Bottom line? This is an engrossing memoir of one young woman, Brianna Karp, and her experiences after she gets laid off from her job as an executive assistant. Eventually, she has very few options. She couldn't stay in her very dysfunctional and abusive family situation and her friends were also pressed to the wall financially. When Brianna inherits a trailer after her father's suicide (they hadn't seen each other for years), she sets up camp in a Walmart parking lot - where Walmart staff allowed only cars or trailers to stay in one far section of the parking lot.

Why Walmart? Simple. Trailer parks and RV sites could cost as much as $40 a day. Walmart was free.

Because Brianna had not given up her laptop (a wise decision, although one slammed by some readers), she was able to hang out at the local coffee shop while going through the last of her unemployment benefits. She desperately scoured the internet for job leads. After a friend suggests she start a blog about her life, she did just that, aptly named The Girl's Guide to Homelessness. With her website and blog, she has the chance to gain local and national attention and start to build a life with some stability.. But there are plenty of bumps, including a romance that....well, I'm not giving any info about that. You'll have to read the book to learn more.

This book has won praise by distinguished writers such as Margaret Atwood. Brianna's blog has also caused arguments and debates, primarily because she may be seen as an atypical homeless person, with a job history and potentially more options than others who have lost everything. She is somehow able to get enough money to hang out at Starbucks where there are wireless connections - but only for the cost of a cup of coffee because the servers don't care how long she stays after her purchase. She has a trailer but that trailer is far from a luxurious living space and there aren't water hook-ups in that parking lot.

Again, I'll bet a fair number of readers will argue that Brianna wasn't a "typical" homeless person. But what IS the typical face of homelessness? How would YOU define it? I'm no expert but I've worked as a volunteer with homeless people and know that some wouldn't meet the definitions of those who think all homeless people live on the streets, begging for money to buy food. Instead, some manage to find refuge in their cars or (temporarily) in the homes of friends or in shelters...and many won't turn to shelters because some are far from safe. Like Brianna, some have temporary unemployment benefits but no immediate prospect of a job. Once those unemployment benefits run out...well, that is it. Again, based on my volunteer experience, I know that food pantries and other places that used to provide a bit of a safety net for those without money have been hard pressed during difficult financial times - or even run out of funds, free food, clothing, and other resources. They can be far from a sure thing - more like hit or miss.

And yes, many homeless people do try desperately to hang onto their cars, even if that means sleeping in a parking lot or whatever space they can find. They may not have gas money but a car can be seen as a last refuge, the border between truly living on the streets or having at least a private space, however inadequate, to live.

Because The Girl's Guide to Homelessness is a chronicle of one period in Brianna's life, the early sections focus intensely on her family - and how they affected her for the worse - as much as on the eventual crisis that led to her living in that Walmart parking lot. Until she was 9 years old, Brianna felt loved but that would change. Brianna describes her mother as growing more and more abusive, not only verbally attacking Brianna but also stealing what money she could earn. When Brianna lost her job, events also led to an ultimatum where she was forced to leave home with only $300 in her pocket.

Again, as you read Brianna's memoir, you may find yourself wondering how a woman with a trailer could truly be considered "homeless." You're not alone. So did other bloggers and online readers at a site called HomelessTales (yes, all one word), accusing Brianna of merely "playing" at being homeless - among other things. Brianna countered by bringing up the different pasts and experiences of ALL individuals, including the way people coped with living without a permanent landing place. Some were scorned for hanging onto laptops, cell phones (often pay as you go) or other items that they could have sold. But these things could be lifelines in difficult circumstances. Cell phones could be the quickest link to an employer's call - if and when it comes - as well as a way to hide one's status as homeless.

There is also romance in this memoir and that takes up much of the last section. Yes, this isn't a typical book about "homelessness" but I couldn't put it down. Instead of a guide, I found it to be an account of how Brianna coped with being on her own with little to no resources - until she started her blog and that blog drew more and more readers. Her decisions about how to spend her money and time are sure to raise some eyebrows. But this book is still compelling and well worth reading.

This memoir could easily be divided into 3 chronological parts:

Part I - early family life and complications from a dysfunctional family

Part II - job history, unemployment and getting by.

Part III - romance and growing attention for Brianna's plight.

I read the entire book, and it reaffirmed my belief that you cannot save people from themselves. I understand the need for a laptop and cell phone, and I understand that the author represents a different sect of homelessness that defies the stereotype. I get it, and I don't hold that against her. She lost me at international plane tickets and buying a second laptop. It made me think about how long I have to save up for items like that, and I realized that I have to save for a long time because I make paying for shelter a priority. I believe she started out down and out, but it seems like somewhere along the way, she got off on being the "poster child" for homelessness, and then began to identify with it.