Customer Reviews

Goal-Free Living: How to Have the Life You Want NOW!

5 star:		(11)
4 star:		(5)
3 star:		(2)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(2)

 

 

There are tons of self help books that basically tell you to follow my plan and you will achieve your dreams. This is not one of them-- which is a very good thing. I am not a fan of self help books and this is not one of them.

Shapiro has taken a different look at the issue of you and your success and turned it on its head. The idea is simple, while we may keep score based on our goals, our quality of life is not based on the score but rather how we play the game.

If you think about it, that is important and something that is easy to lose sight of. Goal Free living helps you get that back into your sights and better your life.

The book does provide eight tools for you really apply to your daily life. A plan is for a person, tools are things that everyone can use. Those tools include:

> Use a compass, not a map
> Trust that you are never lost
> Remember that opportunity knocks often, but sometimes softly
> Want what you have
> Seek out adventure
> Become a people magnet
> Embrace your limits
> Remain detached

These eight secrets are presented in an actionable format and illustrated with stories about real and remarkable people. People that you can relate to, not a one in a million superstar who you can admire but not emulate. Those stories and Shapiro's unique conversational style make them accessible.

I highly recommend this book as it will cause you to pause, evaluate what you are doing, and adopt the tools that can improve your life.

*****
This book, Goal-Free Living by Stephen Shapiro, offers just what it promises---practical ways to have the life you want WITHOUT setting goals. The material is fresh and very useful. Each concept has many concrete applications so that you can easily see how you personally can live your life and accomplish things without formal goals.

As a high achiever with a Type-A personality, having strived for excellence my whole life, I now find myself middle-aged and very, very tired. I find the author's apporach VERY stress-relieving. I paradoxically find that I get more done, and the "right" things done as well, when I follow the concepts in the book.

I am a big fan of Stephen Shapiro's blog at http://www.goalfree.com/blog/ and read it daily. It's full of useful articles. Browse it to "get a taste" of the book and to see what you think. The author also offers a free discussion guide there.

As others have mentioned, it is full of information, but a fast and easy read (maybe 3-5 hours depending upon how quickly you read). Highly recommended!
*****

From a marketing perspective, the title works. As a career consultant, I meet many people who are terrified of goals and, at the same time, desire a new life that can be delivered as quickly as a cheese pizza.

But in choosing a "goal-free" premise, author Shapiro finds himself doing just what he argues against. On page 61, Shapiro brings up the New Age slogan, "What you focus on, expands." Following through, he needs to heed the wisdom of the classic law of attraction authors. Instead of seeking to be debt-free, they tell us, we should see prosperity. The universe hears the word "debt" and gives us more.

Whether you accept law of attraction or think it's hokey, I'd say it's important to demand consistency. Self-contradiction can be a credibility buster.

That said, why write a book based on the premise of something you don't want? What replaces goals -- spontaneity? serendipity? seizing the moment?

In attacking goals, Shapiro uses a very specific concept of goals. At one point he compares having goals to following a recipe. The best cooks, he says, eventually learn to create their own recipes. But, as he acknowledges, they know what they're not using.

Shapiro also seems to attack goals that come from others. Most career consultants would agree. Those who become lawyers, doctors and salespersons to satisfy a parent's dream often become restless and dissatisfied. But some people dream of those very achievements, which call for considerable sacrifice along the way.

Finally, Shapiro loses credibility for me when he relies on Myers-Briggs to differentiate goal-oriented vs goal-free individuals. Everyone should read Annie Paul's book, The Cult of Personality, before resorting to the controversial and unscientific MBTI.

In the end, this book seems to be more about taking control of your life and getting an honest sense of what you want. Most of the content seems good, if not especially original. Why get hung up on whether you're following or not following goals?

And what if we decide to follow some of the author's recommendations, such as, "Become a people magnet." Are we or are we not pursuing a goal? And who cares?

I first heard about this book from an interview with the author on Tom Peters' web site. Shapiro's viewpoint was intriguing, but I wondered whether, as with many other business books, this would turn out to be the informational equivalent of a 10-page article, puffed up with enough hot air to make it book-length.

Fortunately, it's not like that. While the "Secrets of Goal-Free Living" can be listed in half a page of text, the chapter on each "secret" includes ample illustrations of how it works: anecdotes from Shapiro's personal experience, research findings, statistical data, interviews, etc.; so what sounds like a simplistic platitude in the chapter heading often turns out to be a profound statement about life. And his questions for the reader to ponder are stimulating. I was especially intrigued by his story of how he came to write this book (which was NOT the book he originally set out to write); it's a classic instance of what goal-free living is all about.

I've seen far too many examples of goals gone wrong: disastrous marriages because someone was determined to start their family by age 25, missed oportunities ("If you join the Peace Corps, you'll be 2 years late in starting medical school"), bad career decisions (including my first) because someone was pressured to choose a specific goal before they knew what they really wanted to do with their life, and profound disappointment when someone achieved a long-pursued goal, only to be confronted with "What's next?" (And, from many years of dieting, I can vouch that goal-setting is NOT a magical formula for success!) I heartily endorse Shapiro's advice to set your "compass" in a general direction, but to live in the present and remain open to the opportunities it offers; if you're constantly living for the future, you'll miss all the joy in the present moment.

Stephen Shapiro's books doesn't really recommend being "goal free" -- it recommends being clear about what's really important and focusing on getting the most out of the present rather than focusing foremost on the future. He is laying out the value of this versus being overly goal-focused (the "it's the journey,not the destination" perspective). He offers a well thought out approach to living a fulfilling life that will especially resonate with anyone with a high Myers Briggs "perceiver" preference. If you spend a lot of time feeling you "should" have more and better goals, this book may give you an alternative way to look at your journey.

As an experienced voice instructor, I see students all the time who work really hard at their goal of "trying to sing". What inevitably happens is that they strain their throats, stick their necks out and hurt themselves in the process!

In order to really sing beautifully, easily and expressively, we need to relax, breathe and align ourselves with our passion in the moment (not worrying about what just happened or what should happen next).

Stephen Shapiro's goal-free take on life reminds me that this is also true in the rest of your life -- and I definitely have been needing the reminder lately!

As our music school's executive director with major fundraising deadlines, it's been MUCH more of a challenge.

Goal-free Living helped me to look at my past 2 years and realize that the times I have gotten the best results were the times that I was open to the flow and serendipity of life in the moment and took care of myself. The times that I was stressed, overworking and desperate were the times that I was the least effective. The past week was living proof!

Thank you Stephen for your fun, inspiring and life-changing book!

From another perspective, many of the tools he recommends are easy to understand explanations of Buddhist philosophies that have been working and respected for centuries.

And what incredible people he interviewed! The fascinating stories of the voodoo priest, the dating club members, the CIO of Intel are worth your time and money alone. I'd love to see a sequel of all the interesting stories and people that couldn't fit into this book.

Goal free living has many interesting concepts and ideas that will change the way you think. One of the many key concepts that I liked is not always looking for one particular outcome but instead looking for any significant outcome. This makes a lot of sense, today we are tied to looking for the one thing that will bring us happiness, and by just looking for that one thing we pass up so many other things in the process. Every thing we do we should be looking for a significant outcome, and it may not be the one we were expecting. This is just one of many exciting concepts in the book. The book is not about being lazy or just going through life with no direction but instead going through life with a theme. The book is very easy to read and is short. Enjoy, and continue seeking different knowledge not just more knowledge..

Many people live their lives to please others -- their parents, their spouses, their employers or their friends. Others find themselves caught up in cookbook advice that will lead to being wealthy . . . such as live where the costs are low (but there are drawbacks to living in the middle of the Sahara Desert). Still others pick goals and never get around to rechecking their choices.

Creativity expert Stephen Shapiro challenges these people to get in touch with themselves and pursue a life that pleases them every day . . . not just on days when major goals are accomplished or praise is won from others. It's a noble and worthwhile message.

Although Mr. Shapiro was not a teenager in the 1960s, he could have been. Many of the book's themes will resonate powerfully with those who love New Age approaches learned in those distant days. In addition, his viewpoint is one that those in the Judeo-Christian tradition will find comfortable.

His concept is boiled down from 150 interviews with those leading pleasing lives into the following principles:

Use a compass, not a map (this allows you to be flexible in making progress towards uncovering and enjoying your passions)

Trust that you are never lost (look around to see what's good about where you are and keep moving ahead rather than sticking with the past)

Remember that opportunity knocks often, but sometimes softly (listen to that wee, quiet voice within -- Christians will like this advice!)

Want what you have (appreciate everything: it's all good for you)

Seek out adventure (be open to that road less traveled and go for the zest every day!)

Become a people magnet (alone you can do little, together almost anything is possible)

Embrace your limits (look for what's good about what you cannot do and back off from doing too much)

Remain detached (be like the meditator who sees herself from outside herself)

Curiously, although the book's title is Goal-Free Living, the Goalaholic quiz in the back suggests that you can be too goal-less for your own good. That's called being Directionless.

The phraseology differentiates between goals (which are usually bad because they often don't reflect what you really want) and aspirations (which are good because they inspire you and feed your passion).

Phraseology aside, if you have goals that fit your aspirations, you probably can use all kinds of goals.

I wondered how I would rank on the quiz. I turned out to be Goal-Free which surprised me because I use goals quite a lot. Apparently, my goals must be in tune with my aspirations. Whew!

This book isn't for everyone. But if you often question how you ended up with a life that you don't really care for, this book will be a superb guide to leading you back to what's important for you.

If you liked Mr. Shapiro's book, 24/7 Innovation, you'll find this book is quote compatible with that work (and better written): This of this book as 24/7 Living Innovation.

Enjoy your life!

In a goal-driven society, it was very hard for me to believe that someone had "invented" a concept of "Goal-Free Living." But Stephen Shapiro has done just that! With innovative thinking and progressive concepts, he has transformed me from a guilt-ridden person to a (almost!) guilt-free person, allowing me to "write the script" of my life as each day presents itself. It is important to keep in mind that living goal-free does not mean you can't plan a trip or achieve a desired level of employment due to well thought out steps of progress. On the contrary, I find this book frees up my time to "plan" the things that are really important to me and leave behind the things that aren't. Whether you are a career minded person or someone in a unique position such as myself (care-giver to my sister who has terminal cancer), you will find tidbits of usable knowledge on each and every page. This book will always be on my end table or my nightstand. I guarantee you will not regret investing in this book. Good luck!!!

I got this book after attending an event organized by my alma matter so perhaps my review is bias for that reason.

Anyway, my biggest takaway is: Goal free living is about knowing where you are going, celebrating the progress, being open to take diferrent paths, enjoying every moment in life and connecting with people. Its a good read, and advice everyone should get at some point in life.