Going Home: Finding Peace When Pets Die [Hardcover]

Jon Katz (Author)

Book Description

Release date: September 27, 2011

In Soul of a Dog, Izzy & Lenore,  A Good Dog, and other acclaimed works, New York Times bestselling author Jon Katz has written meaningfully about the cherished bond between humans and animals—especially our intense connection to our pets. Now, in this moving and thoughtful book, Katz addresses the difficult but necessary topic of saying goodbye to a devoted companion, and offers comfort, wisdom, and a way forward from sorrow to acceptance.

When Jon Katz first brought Orson home, he couldn’t predict how this boisterous border collie would change his life, most notably by inspiring him to buy Bedlam Farm. Yet for all of Katz’s years as a dog owner, Orson’s death shook him in a deeply profound way. “I was embarrassed by my grief,” he remembers. “What right did I have to fall to pieces over a border collie?”

Drawing on personal experiences, stories from fellow pet owners, and philosophical reflections, Katz provides guidance and support for those in mourning. By allowing ourselves to grieve honestly and openly, he posits, we can in time celebrate the dogs, cats, and other creatures that have so enriched us. With great compassion, Katz compels us to consider if we gave our pets good lives, if we were their advocates in times of need, and if we used our best judgments in the end. In dealing with these issues, we can alleviate guilt, let go, and help others who are undergoing similar passages. 

Full of empathy, insight, and sage advice, Going Home is an invaluable guide and touchstone for anyone who has lost a pet. Jon Katz honors the animals that have graced our lives and reveals their truly timeless gifts: unwavering companionship and undying love.

Editorial Reviews

Review

Praise for Going Home

"[He's] probably my favorite dog writer, although I will warn people that he's such a lovely writer that he ... tends to make me cry.  I have at least twice ended up in tears on an airplane reading a Jon Katz book."—Julie Rovner, NPR

"For the country’s 77.5 million dog owners and 93.6 million cat owners, this account of the essential grieving process should be extremely helpful."--Library Journal

"(R)eaders will find this book refreshing in its honest depiction of grief over pet loss."--Kirkus

"(A) must-read while your pet is vibrant and healthy...the perfect guidebook for both preparing for and coping with that eventual loss most painfully approach with trepidation."--Seattle Kennel Club


Praise for Jon Katz
 
“With wisdom and grace, Katz unlocks the canine soul and the complicated wonders that lie within and offers powerful insights to anyone who has ever struggled with, and loved, a troubled animal.”—John Grogan, author of Marley & Me
 
“Katz’s world—of animals and humans and their combined generosity of spirit—is a place you’re glad you’ve been.”—The Boston Globe
 
“From Toto to Marley, our canine friends are a sure bet in the literary biz. But no one seems to speak their language like Jon Katz.”—San Antonio Express-News
 
“Katz proves himself a Thoreau for modern times as he ponders the relationships between man and animals, humanity and nature.”—Fort Worth Star-Telegram
 
“I toss a lifetime award of three liver snaps to Jon Katz.”—Maureen Corrigan, National Public Radio’s Fresh Air

About the Author

Jon Katz has written twenty books—eight novels and twelve works of nonfiction—including Soul of a Dog, Izzy & Lenore, Dog Days, A Good Dog, and The Dogs of Bedlam Farm. He has written for The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, Slate, Rolling Stone, Wired, and the AKC Gazette. He has worked for CBS News, The Boston Globe, The Washington Post, and The Philadelphia Inquirer. Katz is also a photographer and the author of a children’s book, Meet the Dogs of Bedlam Farm. He lives on Bedlam Farm in upstate New York with his wife, the artist Maria Wulf; his dogs, Rose, Izzy, Lenore, and Frieda; his donkeys, Lulu and Fanny; and his barn cats, Mother and Minnie.

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Product Details

• Hardcover: 192 pages
• Publisher: Villard; First Edition edition (September 27, 2011)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0345502698
• ISBN-13: 978-0345502698
• Product Dimensions: 5.5 x 0.9 x 8.3 inches
• Shipping Weight: 13.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (97 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #154,050 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
  • #38 in Books > Crafts, Hobbies & Home > Pets & Animal Care > Pet Loss

More About the Author

Bedlam Farm in upstate New York is where I live, write and tend my animals - four dogs, two donkeys, two barn cats. The rambling old farmhouse was built in 1862; it's surrounded by pastures, streams and wooded hillsides, plus four barns and a milkhouse in various stages of disrepair.

I write books- memoirs, novels, short story collections, and beginning in 2011, children's books. I am also a photographer.

In my former life, before I grew preoccupied with sheepherding and moving manure around. I wanted to change my life and write more about the experience of living with and understanding animals.
I write novels and nonfiction books (I've written 20 books), along with columns and articles for Rolling Stone, Wired, the New York Times, and the website HotWired.
Coming to the farm turned out to be a Joseph Campbell style "Hero's Journey." I went off into some dark places, got divorced, struggled to face myself, and found someone to share my life.

My wife Maria Wulf is an artist, who specializes in fiber art. She works in the Studio Barn across the road from the farmhouse. Earlier this year, I thought briefly of selling Bedlam Farm. After getting married, we decided to stay here. My daughter Emma, a sportswriter living in Brooklyn, has written her own book about New York baseball. I publish a blog I love dearly - www.bedlafarm.com. My photos appear there daily. My dogs are Izzy, Lenore, Frieda and Rose, the working dog who helps me run the farm.

My writing life began with a novel - "Sign Off" - an unwittingly prescient story about the jarring changes in work and security.

This year - 2010 - I am returning to fiction. I've written a novel, "Rose In A Storm," about a border collie stranded on a farm in upstate New York during a terrible storm. I wrote this book in conjunction with some animal behaviorists who helped me enter the mind of a dog, and hopefully, be faithful to that. My first children's book "Meet The Dogs Of Bedlam Farm," will be published by Henry Holt next year. I have just finished a short story collection to be published next year by Villard/Random House.
In recent years, photography has become central to me as well as writing. I have been fortunate enough to have several gallery showings of my work, and also sell my photos as notecards through the Redux Gallery in Dorset, Vt.

I am also working on a book about animal grieving. Hopefully, it will be useful.

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

42 of 43 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars I still miss them all August 10, 2011

By Charles M. Nobles VINE™ VOICE

Format:Hardcover|Amazon Vine™ Review (What's this?)

I have read most if not all of Jon Katz's books and have reviewed at least one in both the print and electronic media. I have found them to be insightful, well-written, and generally displaying a thoughtful understanding of animals, especially dogs, that will cause the reader to smile, sometimes laugh out loud; shed a tear or two; and nod their head in understanding and agreement with many of the opinions and theories offered by Katz.
This book is a bit different in that it deals with a subject many fear facing, the death of a cherished animal. Katz encourages the reader to accept, even welcome, grief that naturally occurs when a loved companion pet dies and to recognize it as a healthy sign...within limits. He argues that we should recognize grief as a normal, even healthy, result of our deep feelings for our pets and we should not be ashamed of our feelings. However, he cautions that we should learn to accept the death of an animal as a natural occurance and not try to second-guess how we treated our pet, especially if we had to make the sometimes gut-wrenching decision to euthanize it due to illness, injury, etc. He suggests that mourning is natural and that we should strive to remain connected internally by finding a place for them in our current lives. This can be as simple as remembering them to sharing memories of them with others to more formal activities such as memorials, etc.
I have recently lost a companion dog and have found myself second guessing my decision to have him euthanized a number of times. This book has helped me think through my relationship with him and to almost stop the second guessing, almost but not quite. A least the book has helped me view my relationship with him in a different light and to relearn the fact that death to an animal is a natural part of life and not something they dwell on but accept in the natural order of things. I do not agree with Katz when he asserts that dogs cannot tell us when it is time for them to go. I have had many dogs and truly believe that most if not all have told me in their own way that it was time.
However, that said I heartily recommend this book for anyone that has recently lost a pet or is close to experiencing such a heart breaking event or, for that matter, anyone that simply wants to know more about the subject of pet loss and grieving. This book may well be one of those that become more helpful after more than one reading. I plan to reread it and suspect I will discover more helpful ideas, suggestions, and common sense that I missed the first time. I still miss them all but maybe, just maybe, I did the correct thing in the case of those that I had to have euthanized.

43 of 46 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars "Animals Have Taught Me How to Love Purely." August 2, 2011

By H. F. Corbin TOP 500 REVIEWERVINE™ VOICE

Format:Hardcover|Amazon Vine™ Review (What's this?)

If there is one thing that Jon Katz makes perfectly clear in his latest volume on our relationship with animals, GOING HOME: FINDING PEACE WHEN PETS DIE, is that our pets are not "furry children," they are not people. We can love them as they fill important gaps in our lives but we should not feel guilt, a phenomenon unknown to animals, when we have to make responsible decisions about the ends of their lives. We should consult with our vet but the decision is ultimately ours. Based on the information we have, we should move forward, reminding ourselves that we have done our best. That is good advice.

There is a wealth of other good advice in this book that should become a reference manual for people dealing with losing a pet and the accompanying grief that follows. Since only about 50% of the population has pets, we should be careful about whom we seek out for comfort, perhaps another animal lover or a sensitive friend so that we don't hear from well-meaning people that he was just a dog or a cat after all. Or we can find help via the internet, where we can remain anonymous, from others who have suffered similar losses.

We should anticipate what will happen at the end of our pet's life so we should be prepared, as best we can, when the end comes and grief overcomes us. Everyone grieves in his own time. As Emily Dickinson reminds us, sorrow has its own season. Since animals cannot speak, we have an obligation to speak for them and do the responsible thing for them. We should be honest with our children when their pet dies as well. Mr. Katz suggests that children are much better able to deal with the death of a pet than many of us believe.

One of the most beautiful things about this book is Mr. Katz' incredible candor, something that should not surprise anyone who has read his previous books. He says of his beloved border collie Orson--whom he has written about before-- that he had to have put down after the dog had bitten three individuals: "He was the dog who changed my life." Powerful words. Mr. Katz goes on to say that he felt closer to "this crazy dog" than to his own father, that the dog brought him to a farm and to a new romance in his life. Another dog Izzy was a prince of an animal when it came to visiting people in hospice and taught Katz a great deal about dying. Another dog Stanley always made him laugh. Of course there was no dog like another border collie Rose. Finally, "Animals have taught me how to love purely. And patiently. They have helped fill some of the lonely gaps of life. They have helped me to be a better human being. That, I think, is their legacy and glorious purpose."

Mr. Katz' latest offering should be a book you will come back to again and again for both advice and comfort when your beloved animal "goes home."

19 of 19 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Help for those who've lost a dear furry friend September 27, 2011

By Megan @ Book Brats

Format:Hardcover

Having lost a dog around the same period as I received an advanced reader copy of this book, I was unsure of what to do. My black lab Ozzie had been a part of my life from a young age, and in a sense we grew up together. I'm 24 and Ozzie came into my family when I was 12, but I quickly took to him and he became like a furry brother for me. His death left a void in my life and I immediately picked up this book.

Going Home was both poignant and helpful for me in accepting my dog's death. It tells of celebrating a dog's life and how blessed I am to have been able to experience his life and his gifts to my family and my own life. Katz's own experiences with the death of his dog Orson resonated with me as I searched for hope and comfort in the days after Ozzie's death. What I learned, though, is that Ozzie changed me as a person. This book is the type that will teach you about the power our relationships with our pets have on us as people.

This book helped ease the grieving process involved with the death of a beloved family pet. Ozzie was more than just a pet, though. He really was part of my family. After reading Going Home, I learned to celebrate his life and be grateful for everything he did for me and my family. If you are in the process of grieving the loss of a pet, this is a book you cannot miss. It helps so much.