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39 of 46 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars
1 star only because I can't give it less, February 20, 2007
A ghastly book by the sadly misnamed Sarah Smiley. I have a weakness for domestic memoirs (Jean Kerr, Shirley Jackson, Erma Bombeck) and I am, myself, a military wife, so I was excited to find this book and fully expected to enjoy it.
I hated it. A lot. With the exception of books about serial killers, I don't believe I've ever read a book with a protagonist I liked less. 260 pages of whining. No empathy for anyone: poor Sarah always has it worse. Her mother (an admiral's wife) comments that deployments used to be worse back in the days before email. No, says Sarah, email is worse because there is more disappointed anticipation. ?!?
A friend suffers a miscarriage and Sarah has to be literally shamed into going to help her (Sarah doesn't like blood, you see). Nowhere in the remainder of the book is there an inkling of sympathy for this woman (also a military wife) who has had three miscarriages, the last one while her husband was deployed. It's all about Sarah (who has to babysit for the woman's older child).
Another friend's husband is sent home from the deployment and their family must relocate to California (from Florida) in a month. The reasons for this are not specified, but I can tell you that an officer isn't usually sent home early from a deployment for good behavior. Sarah's response? First, jealousy that her friend's husband is coming home; second, discontent that she (Sarah) will be losing her friend!
The worst, though, is her treatment of her husband, whom she is mad at throughout the entire book. To use one example only: Sarah's husband sends her an email -- one that would have broken my heart had my husband sent it to me -- in which he writes sadly that he will miss seeing their new baby's first smile, just as he missed seeing their older son's. Sarah's response to this? To be angry because that was the only email he sent her that day.
I finished the book only because I was hoping she would grow up! Nope, though. She was just as self-absorbed and whiney on the last page as she had been on the first. I came to Amazon and read the reviews and found several people who said something like "I don't know anything about the military, but now I have an understanding of what military wives go through." I hate the idea that people will read this tripe and think it is in any way representative of me, or of any of the fine military spouses I have known!
And this was a memoir! I can't imagine writing a book in which I acted like a spoiled brat from page 1 to page 260 and allowing it to be published with my picture on the front! Of course, Sarah doesn't think she is a spoiled brat -- oh no! Sarah pees champagne and poops gold bricks and is the white-hot center of the universe...
Once I finished it I threw the thing in the garbage. Yep, the garbage. Usually I donate books I don't want anymore to the library, but that didn't seem final enough in this case. So it's on its way to the York County Waste Treatment Facility right now. And I'm not a bit sorry!
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9 of 11 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
I laughed! I cried! I wanted M&Ms!, March 20, 2006
In her memoir, Going Overboard, Sarah Smiley gives readers the details of the perils she suffered during one of her husband's unexpected deployments. It has to be one of the funniest, most refreshingly honest accounts I've ever read.
I must say I'm appalled at how cruel some of these other reviews are. Truthfully, I believe the negative reviewers either did not even read the book or completely missed the point. Sarah's book is the recollection of a difficult time in her life which helps her realize to that it's time to grow up. The book jacket clearly states that this is a memoir. I'm not sure how it came to be that readers are disappointed because it didn't turn out to be a "how to cope". Hopefully these readers realize that no one can tell you how to cope; that's something you have to figure out on your own after some soul-searching. Perhaps next time they might also scan the book jacket before penning a scathing review.
Sarah spent her entire life in a Navy household, so she figured she was prepared for life as a Navy spouse. However, when her husband deploys, she finds herself unsure and often miserable. Lack of communication on the part of her husband and a crush on her doctor make the situation complicated. Not once does Sarah brag about the status of her father or her husband. I find that refreshing. There is far too much enlisted vs officer chatter amongst military spouses. It does not matter how much money your husband makes. You will still feel the same pain in his absence.
I also love that Sarah tells the story as a woman and not as the stereotypical military spouse. She does not say that "spouses should do this" or "spouses should do that" in regards to their feelings and opinions on the jobs of their significant others. Finally! I commend Sarah for writing what she really felt as opposed to writing 300 pages of lies. No one wants to read that. That's not what writing is about. Can you imagine a book about a spouse enthusiastically seeing her partner off, only to clean house and do crafts for six months? How boring! That's not REAL.
The negative reviewers can deny it as much as they'd like, but the truth is, everyone feels like this at some point or another. Truly strong people are able to share it with others and grow from the experience. There's not a soul who can claim that their every action has been perfect. Sarah's book is about learning and "growing up". The person she was during that particular deployment is not the same person she is today. Rest assured she is stronger and more capable. Sarah, her family, and her marriage are no doubt more solid because of the lessons she learned during this period.
I absolutely adored Going Overboard. I laughed. I cried. Sarah's writing makes the reader feel like they are in the room as the conversation progresses. It feels like she's actually speaking. Congratulations on your book, Sarah. I loved every moment, and I'm looking forward to your next publication!
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
A Great Addition to My Military Spouse Library, May 26, 2006
This review is from: Going Overboard : The Misadventures of a Military Wife (Hardcover)
If Teri Hatcher were a Navy wife, this would be her book. Full of slapstick comedy and honest observations about herself and her world, it's like a chick-lit narrative that's hard to put down. I thoroughly enjoyed reading GOING OVERBOARD, just as I enjoy reading Sarah's weekly columns. Her insights are razor sharp.
GOING OVERBOARD isn't a deployment guide or a how-to book. It's an autobiographical novel or a memoir account of Navy family life during a deployment. If you want a guide, there are good guides out there already, but Sarah's book is a different genre.
As an Army wife, I applaud Sarah Smiley's courage and candor. I hope she inspires other military wives to open up and share their stories.
Marna Krajeski, author of HOUSEHOLD BAGGAGE: The Moving Life of a Soldier's Wife.
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