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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
159 of 175 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars
SEGA Should Have Buried This Hatchet-Job,
By Poisoned Blade (California) - See all my reviews
= Fun:1.0 out of 5 stars
This review is from: Golden Axe: Beast Rider (Video Game)
This is one of the worst 360 games, I've seen. I'll start off with the good. The graphics are mediocre, Tyris's run speed is kinda fast, and Death Adder looks cool. Everything else is terrible. This game takes the worst elements of the original Golden Axe and slaps them together at a pathetic attempt to make a next gen game.
Story - 0/10 The game begins with Tyris walking through a barren valley by herself and realizing she's late for a huge ceremony where her Dragon God flies down from the sky and blesses her people. She realizes that being late for this is probably a bad thing and starts to run, but encounters orc-like creatures called, "BOOGEYMEN." Seriously, that's that they're called. She battles her way through the BOOGEYMEN and arrives at the ceremony too late. A group of BOOGEYMEN kill all of the priestesses, knock Tyris out, and kidnap her all mighty Dragon God. - If your Dragon God gets kidnapped by a band of Orcs, it's time to get a new God. Later Tyris awakens and the dwarf from the original game is there, pulling an axe out of his chest. He sees Tyris and exclaims, "By my balls, I thought you were dead." Ok, if you're a hot chick who was unconscious and the first thing you hear is a dwarf talking about his testicles, that's not a good thing. Maybe he's saying he resurrected you somehow with his balls, or he is your father, or maybe that's just a contemporary Dwarven expression. Anyway, the Dwarf gives Tyris an axe and says you must find the pieces and reassemble it. Lucky for Tyris, the pieces just snap on. Near the end of the game, Axe Battler from the original game appears and says something like, "Gee, Tyris, I'm sorry your game sucks so bad. See Ya," and he's gone. I think there are 30 lines of bad dialogue in the entire story. Gameplay - 1/10 In this day and age, developers of real games put the player in an adventure and let them battle their way through it. Golden Axe puts the player in a world and punishes them if they don't do what the designers intended. No attempt is made to make a cohesive world. Instead, the game just stops from time to time and says, "Challenge Complete" and gives you a score, usually telling you that you suck. If you die during a Challenge, you have a LIMITED NUMBER OF CONTINUES that you can use or you must start over. The game also makes every attempt to take cheap shots at the player: Bombs hidden in objectives, poison hidden in chests, near impossible jumps... Controls - 1/10 The controls are very awkward at best. A - Jump, B - Mount Beast, X - Light Attack, Y - Heavy Attack, RB - Parry, LB - Evade, D-Pad - Choose Magic, L Trigger - Run, R Trigger - Magic, X+Y = Knockback Attack. Combat relies heavily on pressing RB, LB, and X+Y. Where do you put your hands to press RB, then X+Y immediately after that?! Combat - 2/10 You begin AND END the game with 2 combos. XXX for multiple enemies. YYY to do damage to a single enemy. If you delay your presses, you deal extra damage. You can mix and match the X's and Y's, but there's no point. You can't get new moves or new weapon types, so you'd better love pressing XXX or YYY. Most of the focus of combat is on Defense, which is a lot less fun than thinking about slaughtering enemies. There is NO BLOCK in the game. Tyris can Parry or Evade. The enemy attacks are color coded. Orange Attacks can be Evaded, Blue can be parried. If you are successful, you can counter attack for extra damage. If you try to Parry a Blue or Evade an Orange, Tyris just stands there and gets beaten up. If no attacks are coming at you, THE BUTTONS DO NOTHING AND YOU ARE IMMOBILE FOR 2 SECONDS. If you are attacking, the Parry and Evade don't take effect until the animation ends, so the best way to fight is to stand still, Parry or Evade, then attack. Boy, I bet you can't wait to experience that! There is no combat manager in the game, so Tyris can be attacked by a Blue and Orange at the same time, which means you get hit and lose your bonus. This reminds Tyris that the world is cruel and unfair. Beasts - 3/10 Beasts are only in the game about 10% of the time. The beasts are sluggish and clunky and they only have 3 attacks each. X, Y, and X+Y. In some cases, using the X+Y attack drains the beast's health. The beasts are disposable and if Tyris gets knocked off a beast, the weakest enemy can jump on it and ride it, to remind her that she is not special. Leveling Up - 0/10 At the end of each challenge, you accumulate Gold. If you defend well, you get a bonus to the gold that you pick up. If you get hit once, the bonus drops to zero. This is very frustrating. When you complete a level, you get graded based on damage taken, gold, time, and dismemberment. If you play on NORMAL MODE, the game multiplies your gold by 1/3!!!!!! You only keep 1/3 of your GOLD!!! The background for this screen should have been a giant middle finger! (Hard Mode is x1) Getting gold, fills a bar at the bottom of the screen. When that fills up, you get what the game decides to give you. You usually get a new outfit for Tyris that looks the same as the one she already has. This reminds Tyris that no matter how hard she tries, she will never get ahead in the world. Level Design - 0/10 Every level looks the same. From the rocky barren plains, to the dusty barren plains dotted with ruins. In every level, there are spikes that randomly pop in and out of the ground for no apparent reason. Absolutely no attempt is made to make this look like a world. Instead the levels are there to take cheap shots at Tyris. In some levels, while riding a dinosaur, the wind can blow you and the dino off of the cliff. Opening doors is incredibly confusing. There are 9 different ways to open doors, but there is only 1 way to open each door, and you never really know how you are supposed to open them. If you ever get lost, the best way to tell if you are headed in the right direction is the slow down. The game drops frames to load in enemies. So, if the game suddenly pauses for a second, that's a good thing. There are invisible walls everywhere, so the levels may look like mass expanses of dirt, but they're linear dirt trails surrounded by dirt. Bosses 1/10 Almost all the bosses are the same guy. It's a 60 foot tall giant that you attack. After you hit him a few times, he crouches. When he crouches, Tyris kicks him and he goes flying backwards into a fire column to take damage. If Tyris can move a 60 foot tall giant with a kick, why can't she jump more than 5 feet? Perhaps the bosses are made of helium. Bugs - 10/10 I've seen Tyris get stuck in level geometry. I've seen the game crash. I've heard the sound skip. I've seen Tyris fall out of the world. There are render tears and slowdown. I've also seen an entire palette shift to blue. Sound - 5/10 The music is ok, but neither feels epic nor atmospheric. The Ending - 0/10 Tyris catches up with her captured Dragon God and he tells her the final piece of the axe is his soul. She stabs him in the head and does her best Darth Vader Episode 3, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" I laughed for a minute. Then you fight Death Adder. The fight is 20 minutes long and makes no sense. But, that's ok because the fight pauses every few minutes and pop-up windows appear giving you detalied instructions on what you are supposed to be doing. Hit him, ride him, make him destroy some statues, then a cutscene plays where Death Adder says, "Fool, I will destroy you!" Tyris replies, "Maybe, but not this day!" Seriously, that's what she says. She chops his head off. Your reward... a skimpy white bikini costume. So, the final scene plays and the Dwarf and Axe are there. Tyris says, "I've lost my land, my god, my people..." But it's hard to take her seriously because she looks like `Fun in the Sun' Tyris who's about to go play beach volleyball and drink something with a little umbrella in it. Axe Battler says, "This is just the beginning." The dwarf starts to talk, but is abruptly cut off by the credits. That's right, the credits interrupt the last cutscene. The game is rated M for violence, gore, and nudity. Unfortunately, the nudity is only on dead, charred, or dismembered bodies. If you're going to put breasts in a game, put them on living women so the non-necrophiliacs can enjoy them, too. If you're dying to play a hack and slash game, you should play Ninja Gaiden 2, Devil May Cry 4, Oblivion, Too Human, Viking, The Force Unleashed, Lego Star Wars, Assassin's Creed... then buy a Wii and play Zelda and No More Heroes... then buy Castle Crashers on the Xbox Marketplace... You're better off avoiding this game. If you feel you must play it, it's only 6-8 hours long and not very difficult. You might be thinking, "Poisoned Blade, if the game was so bad, why did you finish it?" I did it, so you don't have to.
18 of 22 people found the following review helpful:
3.0 out of 5 stars
not a must-own, but not as bad as people say,
By
= Fun:3.0 out of 5 stars
This review is from: Golden Axe: Beast Rider (Video Game)
it's funny. most people who give this game a crap review go on to say "i played for a half hour and shut it off". that's like watching a movie for 3 minutes and saying it's crap. you can't comment on what you don't know. after playing through most of the game (i'm almost done)i can say this game isn't as bad as people say. it's not without some design flaws, but in a game like this, combat is most important, and i find it satisfying. there is a neat parry/evade system with counterattacks that feels good.
here's is the games signature(it isn't riding beasts, been there, done that): in any game, typically when you enter a button sequence for a combo, the attack animation plays out no matter what, leaving you open for damage. in this game, however, you can cancel out of a combo with a parry/evade button press, whichever is most appropriate. in my opinion this is very refreshing. if you're a fan of the conan-type setting, give this one a whirl. rent before purchase, but trust me, i've played much worse. i give it 6/10.
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:
3.0 out of 5 stars
Gold or Pyrite?,
= Fun:3.0 out of 5 stars
Amazon Verified Purchase(What's this?)
This review is from: Golden Axe: Beast Rider (Video Game)
Golden Axe. That name is instantly recognized by so many gamers that to not know what it is would mean you are very young or naïve when it comes to classic gaming. I absolutely loved the original game, both the Arcade and Genesis versions. It was simple to pick up, hard as nails to master and an absolute blast to play through with a friend. It came out in a time when the Conan movies were still popular and fresh and the Frazetta inspired art style was the norm for anything Sword and Sorcery. The Genesis version caught the eye of many and proved that, at least with Golden Axe, the catchy marketing slogan "Genesis does what Nintendon't" rang true. It certainly was not a revolutionary game by any standard, not even in its hack `n slash genre, but it remains one of my most treasured games ever and to this day provides me with great joy. It just nailed the presentation perfectly and always felt like an epic adventure with a perfect combination of great art direction, catchy music and accessible but challenging game play you could enjoy with a friend.
When I first heard Sega was bringing back their Golden Axe franchise I immediately looked for news on it. I am always skeptical about classic 2D franchises being brought back to life in a 3D world, but I was hopeful that maybe Sega could do this series justice. When I looked into Golden Axe: Beast Rider after first hearing about it, I was extremely disappointed that it did not have coop, which was one of the main draws of the original game twenty years ago. Not only was there no coop, but you could only play as the Amazon, Tyris. No Dwarf? I think it's safe to say that the Dwarf was most people's favorite character, so not including him as a playable character was a serious omission. As for Tyris herself, to me she looked nothing like an Amazon warrior but like most other cliché female protagonists found in Video Games. Tyris looks like she moonlights as a cage dancer in a Vegas night club, not the tall and spry warrior she is supposed to be. I was so turned off by these odd design choices that I just stopped paying attention to its upcoming release and was not the least bit surprised when I noticed all the terrible reviews it was getting. No coop, no Dwarf, a short little club girl with a Vidal Sassoon hairstyle posing as Tyris and according to the reviews, bad game play to boot. I never picked the game up and completely forgot about it until recently. A couple months ago I downloaded the classic arcade version of Golden Axe for 200 points during a sale on XBLA. It is worth the normal 400 points, but since I have multiple versions of this game on my Genesis and PC, I never bothered looking for it on XBLA. I thought it would be fun to experience the Arcade version on my Xbox and on my HDTV with leader boards and a graphics filter which smoothened out the pixilated visuals. I was hooked all over again, I absolutely love this game, and I suddenly found myself taking a second look at Beast Rider. I heard it was terrible and just assumed it was considering how harsh so many reviewers were on the game. I knew that it lacked coop and the Dwarf as a playable character yet I had Golden Axe on the brain and felt a growing urge to pick up Beast Rider. I checked out many game play videos on youtube and though I didn't see much redeeming quality in these videos, a good number of the people playing did insist that although the game may not be great, the reviews were too harsh. I also noticed something when watching these videos that I had ignored before, the art style. In a day and age when so many Fantasy games seem to be going for a Korean influenced look in their art design with bright pastel colors and ridiculously disproportionate armor and weapons, it was nice to see Beast Rider stay true to the Conan/ Frank Frazetta art style the original game used to have. The game dropped to a very cheap price on Amazon and I decided to pull the trigger and give it a try. What the hell, if anything I could write my first one star review for a truly bad game which would make me appreciate the better games out there all the more. After a slow start and a feeling I was just wasting my time (I'm not in the habit of buying bad games and writing reviews since I don't get paid to do it), something funny happened, the game started to pick up the pace and actually be quite enjoyable at times. After having completed the game I have to say that though there are plenty of flaws to be found, it really isn't that bad of a game and many of the professional reviews I have read seem to unfairly trash it. Golden Axe: Beast Rider is an underrated title, though underrated doesn't mean it's great. When I first fired up the game I was shown a cutscene explaining the origins of the Golden Axe. Nothing special here, I could tell the story was not going to be much. After this intro I arrived at the title screen where I could select to play the main Campaign, Challenge Mode or Trials of Tyris mode. The challenge mode is basically the same as selecting individual chapters from the campaign to replay in an attempt to get a higher ranking (your ranking is a letter grade you are awarded for how well you did) and the Trials of Tyris take place in six arenas which you unlock as you progress further in the campaign. In these arenas you face 10 waves of enemies and it reminded me a little of the Duel mode from the Genesis version of Golden Axe. As you play the game and collect more and more loot, referred to as tribute in Beast Rider, new weapons are unlocked for you to use in the challenge or trials. You cannot upgrade weapons during the campaign. Different outfits will be unlocked for Tyris to wear as you progress in campaign, you can choose which to wear in challenge or trials mode, but the game selects them for you while playing the campaign. Once you beat the campaign the first time through to unlock most of the weapons and the outfits, there is no reason to play campaign mode again, just go to challenge mode and select each chapter manually so you can choose which weapons and outfits you want. When starting the campaign the game sets up what little story there is, Tyris is part of some Dragon worshipping cult of hot babes and she is late for a ceremony. She isn't doing anything in particular, just wandering in the woods and suddenly realizes she is late, oops. She gets to her ceremony and her Dragon God is attacked by the armies of the evil Death Adder (bad guy from the original games) and the priestesses she knows as sisters are slaughtered. Tyris survives the ambush, runs into the Dwarf from the classic games (who we can't play as) and he tells her about the Golden Axe and how she must put the pieces together to defeat the evil Death Adder. So our journey begins. As mentioned before, the game starts off very slow. I really had to force myself through the first few challenges as the pacing was just dreadful. There is a quick tutorial at the beginning of the game, but it doesn't teach you much beyond the basics and in my opinion, could have explained some of the intricacies of the combat system better. The entire game is actually one long continuous journey which is divided up into "challenges". These challenges have no clear end to them, there is no real boss or anything at the end of them, you just cross an invisible line and then a "challenge complete" screen pops up and shows you your stats. It's an awkward design decision as it intrudes on the pacing of the game. The beginning of each challenge serves as a checkpoint so when you die, it's back to the beginning of a challenge unless you have a Dragon Statue which you can use to resurrect yourself on the spot (it is best to conserve these). During the early challenges I wasted quite a few of these dragon statues since I was struggling with the combat and was still trying to figure the game out. The early level design of the game isn't all that inspired either and it all just felt like a long hard slog I had to force myself through. Some enemies would pop up, I would kill them, run for a while until some random wooden spikes popped out of the ground or another pack of enemies would come after me. These early challenges in the game are excruciatingly boring and frustrating, but sometime shortly after challenge 4 the game did start to come together for me and I started to have fun. The fun started when I got used to the evade and parry system. Golden Axe: Beast Rider has a heavy focus on defense and if you try and play this game like your usual offensive based hack and slash, or a button masher, then you are screwed. An orange flash on the enemy's weapon means an evadable attack is coming (left bumper to evade) and a blue flash means you parry (right bumper). A green flash means the attack can be either evaded or parried. In addition to evading or parrying, you can also counter if your timing is right and you press the right button for the enemy you are facing. After parrying/evading an attack you want to press the A button (quick strike), X button (Heavy strike) or A and X simultaneously (knock back attack) to perform a counterattack (which has its own animation) which devastates a foe's health and can also damage those around you in a certain radius. Small enemies are countered with the X button, medium sized enemies with X and A at the same time while Large and undead enemies are countered with the A button. You will face bosses in this game as well and they too can be countered using one of these three inputs, you'll just have to experiment to find out which. You can also parry and evade ranged magic attacks. The only way to really get used to this system is to play the game until it clicks. Once everything starts to come together the game does get progressively more fun and I can appreciate what the developers were trying to do here. They wanted to create some real intense... Read more › 2115|R17J8BS4D0ND5R;2115|R2GSGSCYS7O62P;2115|R2F0XVMXP34FHN;
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