Customer Reviews

Good Enough Is the New Perfect: Finding Happiness and Success in Modern Motherhood

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I have read Good Enough Is The New Perfect cover to cover - and disclose I am one of the mothers featured in the book (Dr. Jen - pediatrician with two sets of twins). I was BLOWN AWAY with the insights offered in this book on the life of today's mom - working, not working, thinking about working, one child, many children, married, single... Becky and Hollee get it on all levels. What I loved MOST is the approach to BALANCE this fabulous resource generates - and I have never read another book like it. What makes us happy as mothers? Where do we find balance, and what is balance and happiness all about? Becky and Hollee explore it all - through in-depth surveys with over 1000 moms to deep interviews with a handful of amazing women. I highly (highly!) suggest this book as a staple for ANY mom - because we've ALL BEEN THERE - wondering if we're doing it "right" and striving to find balance and happiness. This is also a fabulous book to buy as a gift for a new mom making those challenging decisions about getting back to work or staying home. Good enough is my motto in motherhood and life - and this PERFECT book hits it on the head!

"Good Enough Is the New Perfect" inspired me from the very first page. At first, I wasn't sure it would be for me, because though I used to have a demanding and successful career, I have chosen to stay home with my young daughter. Not being a "working mother", I wasn't sure what I'd get out of this book. But what I realized immediately as I started reading, is that all mothers take so much upon our shoulders, whether or not we are working full-time, working in an office, working from home, or even choosing to be "stay at home moms". The guilt and the need to achieve "perfection" in all aspects of our lives can really drag us down. I know I feel that way all the time, and it's so good to realize that I am not alone.

I love how this book begins... "This is not a book about settling". And it's true. It's a book that reminds women that each of us can achieve our own "new perfect". We need to stop judging each other, and especially judging ourselves, because what works for one woman and her family isn't going to work for another. Finding balance certainly isn't always easy, and the authors readily admit that, but the incredible women profiled in this book show us how we can find our own peace and a working balance between our responsibilities, our passions, and our families. The stories the authors and their subjects share are personal, sometimes painful, often triumphant -- and something I believe all women can relate to. This book makes me want to be a better mother, a better wife, and a better contributor to my society -- and not because I feel I'm falling short, but because I know now what is possible, and I know there's a community of women out there doing the same things and none of us have to be alone.

I don't do self-help books.

I feel like I should throw that out there because it speaks volumes about what I'm about to tell you.... I don't do self-help books; I hate non-fiction, for the most part; and documentaries, as much as I'd like to be all high-brow and love them, make me sleepy. I like my books and my movies full of fantasy, adventure, and romance and above all else, I want them to be 92% fake. At all times.

So at first, when Hollee Temple told me about the book she and Becky Gillespie wrote on modern day motherhood, "Good Enough is the New Perfect: Finding Happiness and Success in Modern Motherhood," I was skeptical. This was a book that was about my life; why did I want to sit down and read a book about my life? There would be no romance, no humor, no excitement... it was just some dry book about how much it sucks being a working mother, right?

Oh. So. Wrong.

Guys? This book is amazing.

You know how when you were growing up, you were told you could have it all as a woman? You know how you pictured your life being all white picket fences with two kids blowing bubbles in the yard while you stood and smiled with your slightly taller and oh-so-handsome husband? And then you'd both go off to your jobs and you'd have this awesome career that worked with your motherhood?

Oh, and then remember when you became a wife and a mother and a career woman and you didn't remember sleep deprivation and daycare as being part of your childhood equation?

Yeah.

This book? It's about that. It's about what comes after the Motherhood plus career equal sign. It's about making your life, just the way it is, equal happiness. It's brutally honest without being brutal to read. The book mixes humor and frailty and glaring honesty to paint a picture of what all of us career woman are *REALLY* going through on a daily basis. And then, just when you find yourself nodding and saying "Yes EXACTLY! That's exactly how I feel!" it starts to provide you with real life solutions that worked for real life women. Ultimately, the underlying theme of the book is just what the title says... being happy being good enough is the key to finding success as a modern, working (or non-working) mother.

I will admit that I skipped the chapter about being a good enough wife because I just couldn't take it. I read a bit of it and when I found myself feeling like a total failure in my own marriage, I had to skip on to the next part. But the rest of the book? I loved. It made me think about why I stress myself out over things like having a spotless house and being the best of the best at my job. It made me realize that I need to take a few more moments to breathe and to worry less about being, well, perfect. Because ultimately, we're all in this together... we're all just women trying to make this work for us and for our spouses and our kids. We're all just trying to make this work.

Partially from reading this book on finding new ways to make my life work without striving for constant perfection, I went out and found a new job.... and got a divorce. No, kidding about the divorce part... but as you all may have known, my job was not working for me as a mother. There was so much travel and so many long hours and I just couldn't do it and be the kind of mother I wanted to be.

After reading "Good Enough is the New Perfect: Finding Happiness and Success in Modern Motherhood," I realized that I didn't have to make that lifestyle and career fit me... I could find a career that fit me better and as a result, I could be happier in my home life. So later this week, I'll step back into my heels and head into a new office. This one is on the other side of the law, which means no more long travel, no more billable hours, and no more feeling like my life boils down to numbers on a time sheet. It's a start, right? And honestly, this is the kind of book you can go back and read and re-read. Like the chapter on the Best Laid Plans? Yeah, I may have read that a few times since my husband announced he wanted a divorce.

I don't say this lightly... This book is a life changer. It's one of those things you sit down and read a chapter or two of and think "Why am I running myself ragged?? These women are RIGHT!" and then you do something... even if it's a small something... to implement some better choices for yourself. When I find something like this book (which was provided to me for free to review), I want to share it with the world. My mother read a few chapters and fell in love. My friends have asked to borrow it.

You want to read this book... seriously... you do. Look, when I got this book, I was in a marriage I didn't know was bad; I was miserable; I was working a job that didn't fit me, and did I mention I was miserable? I'm not saying this book has magical qualities, but what I am saying is that I read it about two months ago when I was so miserable that the only thing that made any sense to me was giving up on everything... and now I'm living in a house I love, in a familiar town, with a brand new, no billable hour job, and without the husband who was making everything more difficult. So... maybe it is a touch magic? :)

This book manages an almost impossible task - it's fun to read and chock full of good advice. It's not preachy at all but gives good guidance for those looking to find their own "new perfect" (read the book to figure out what that means for you!). While I think it's a well-written, keenly observed look at a particular moment in time as American women push toward fuller equality and greater personal satisfaction, what I think I'll remember 10 years down the road is how this book gave me the courage to make some overdue adjustments in my life and my family's life.

Give it a try - I think you'll really like what you find. I know I did.

Oprah Winfrey often talks about an "Aha!" moment, that second where something clicks in your head and you can feel it in your heart. I had my aha moment while reading this book.

I have always tried to do everything right in my life to have all that I thought I wanted. But I wasn't happy. And, I was lonely. Right away when I started reading this book, I felt found. Through the authors' stories and interviews, I discovered this amazing inspiration to make some serious changes in my life. And, it was fun to read! When I wasn't nodding ferociously in agreement, I was laughing out loud. This book literally gave me the tools I need to live a better and healthier life. Thank you, Becky and Hollee!

The most refreshing thing about "Good Enough is the New Perfect" is its tone. Much of the "self-help" literature aimed at working moms is fraught with judgment, and wastes no time telling women how they're "doing it wrong" (whatever "it" may be) and will inevitably screw up their children as a result. It's all about guilt, and is no wonder that so many working women second-guess themselves to the brink of insanity.

But, Temple and Gillespie genuinely seem to want to offer guidance and help, not only demonstrating how the hotshot women in their book have figured out what works for them, but giving tips at the start of each chapter, with practical advice and suggestions for women seeking their own elusive work/life balance. And, the authors don't offer their book as the definitive word on the work/life balance topic, much like they realize there's no one size that fits all working women.

I've long been a subscriber to the theory that you can't be perfect.

Some would say that's the lazy woman's way out, a good rationale for not vacuuming or for taking the path of least resistance in life. But for me, what it has really meant is knowing when to cry "Uncle."

That's why "Good Enough Is the New Perfect: Finding Happiness and Success In Modern Motherhood" resonates so deeply with me. This wonderful, smart book by Becky Beaupre Gillespie and Hollee Schwartz Temple made me feel that much less alone on this imperfect path I've chosen as both a mom and a professional.

Hollee and Becky are both driven, intellectual powerhouses: Becky is an investigative journalist and Hollee is a lawyer and law professor, and they brought all of their skills to bear in this book.

Their original, ground-breaking research reveals a new paradigm emerging in modern motherhood, one that resonates deeply for me, and, I think, lots of other women.

Based on exclusive data, more than 100 in-depth interviews, and the latest research, Good Enough Is the New Perfect builds on the growing "anti-perfection parenting" movement.

More and more women are tossing their Never Enough attitudes aside and embracing a Good Enough mindset. While it may be a messier reality, Becky and Hollee show that Good Enoughs are often happier -- and more successful in their professional lives.

Written with a highly personal, engaging voice, the book tells the real and inspiring stories of moms (including the authors themselves) who reached their own breaking points when it came to striving for perfection. What they found when they released that self-expectation was that they were actually able to achieve more -- and with balance.

When my daughter was born, I fretted for four long months over whether or not to leave my high-paying but terribly unfulfilling corporate job as a marketing manager for a Fortune 100 company. The job came with a lovely salary, but was slowly sucking the soul out of me.

I never planned to be a stay-at-home mom, but suddenly, that was all I wanted. I couldn't bear leaving my child behind each day for work that paid for my fancy apartment but left me longing for the scent of my newborn's skin.

So, after long talks with my husband (and his full support), I left that behind. The day I resigned was one of the happiest of my life. Fast-forward six years and I find myself on a path of my own making, as a entrepreneur, social media consultant and freelance writer and editor.

It is a path I never could have imagined, one that didn't fit into my notion of what a perfect life would look like. There is little job security in what I do, but there is a tremendous amount of freedom and fun. I can be with my children when I choose and I also feel very, very good about the work I do.

I am satisfied.

My carpets are often dirty and dinner sometimes comes from a box or a bag, but we are perfectly imperfect.

I was lucky enough to be a first reader for Becky and Hollee's book, and I am here to tell you that if you read it, you will either feel less alone and validated -- or, if you are struggling with the burden of perfection, you will find in its pages the permission you need to lay that burden down.

When I started reading I struggled to relate to the women in the book because I don't consider myself a "high powered" career women such as a doctor or lawyer. But if you are a working mom, whether you are a doctor, lawyer, teacher (like me!), blogger, or whatever, we are all struggling to balance home, work, and personal time. Learning to accept how much you can do and be satisfied and happy with yourself is a personal journey. Good Enough is the New Perfect offers tips to help.

With one foot in the world of "working moms" and one in the world of "stay at home moms", I often feel alone and not good enough professionally or personally. I read the whole book (can't remember when I last made time to read an entire book that wasn't "required" in some way), and I'm quite glad I did. The authors' honest reflections and stories from their interviewees made me nod, several times, and feel less alone. Their stories of how they (and others) moved on from situations that were not working (and suggestions for those who find themselves similarly situated) also gave me some ideas for changes. Oh, and an idea for a birthday present for someone who may benefit from reading these stories before having to make critical choices of her own.

First off, is there a better name for a book? I mean really?! That alone made me want to dive right in!

Holle Schwartz Temple and Becky Beaupre Gillespie have teamed up to create: Good Enough is the New Perfect - Finding Happiness and Success in Modern Motherhood A book sharing the stories of many career women navigating their way through balancing life, love and family.

The research they did on this was mind blowing. They sent out an in-depth survey to more than 100 working moms. Capturing information like "Why do you work" and "How has your definition of success changed since having children". They interjected the women's personal stories along with their own to show why Good Enough IS the New Perfect. After compiling their research they noticed that most women were put in two categories, the "Never Enoughs" and the "Good Enoughs".

While I wasn't exactly a high powered female Lawyer or CEO before kids, I did work with their male counterparts all the while was a mom and helping my husband get through Medical School and Residency. I was just as stressed and fit clearly into the "Never Enough" pile during this time. Since becoming a stay at home mom of 3 boys and now deciding to start my own business, I can relate a lot more with the "Good Enough" moms.

I realize now that the house doesn't have to be sparkling (and if it is, I've clearly paid someone else to do it), the kids are just as happy playing with each other outside, or in, if i need to take a phone call or get some work done, and everyone will be fed, hugged and loved by the end of each night.

This book Good Enough is the New Perfect - Finding Happiness and Success in Modern Motherhood is an excellent read whether you are a career gal, or a stay at home mom. You are the one who can drive your own success and subsequent happiness. You just gotta be okay with what you chose to do, or not do. In my case, I'm perfectly happy not scrubbing my toilets. It works for us!