Customer Reviews

Gravity Pulls You in: Perspectives on Parenting Children on the Autism Spectrum (Mom's Choice Award Recipient)

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"Gravity Pulls You In" is a remarkable anthology of essays by parents of children with autism-spectrum diagnoses. Written by parents for parents, "Gravity Pulls You In" has a special resonance and immediacy that frequently read like poetry and even music. Each child described is unique, with a particular poignancy to the uniqueness. Part of being a parent to such a child seems to include a journey towards a totally different experience of the world. Being able to empathize with your child can open you to new worlds and new experiences. "Gravity Pulls You In" is well worth reading for all educators and child development related professions, as well as other parent. Here is one quotation that is both typical and striking in its originality: "Living with Jacob is about more than allowing the language of his mind to erase the chalk lines of my own patterns. It is about unexpected intersections, the willingness to walk blind, to discern shadows in the lay of the land. It is about the painful unburdening that comes when the mind expands to see anew (p.91)."

Gravity Pulls You In is the book I can finally point to and say, "Yes, this here -- this will give you a sense of what autism is really about, why 'autism' has no one meaning, how our families' and children's joys, pain, love, sorrow, realities feel. Yes. This will help you understand. And if you're a parent new to the world of autism, this will light your way."

I have to warn you -- Gravity Pulls You In is an emotional neutron star. It turned me inside out, had me weeping in both awe and anguish, and I quickly learned not to read it in public. While I mooned over Drama Mama's, Carolyn Walker's, and Emily Willingham's love letters to their children, even the stories that wrung me dry, like Maggie Kast's No Pity, or Ralph James Savarese's You're Adopting Whom? exude love, pride -- and such grace. As contributor Cheri Brackett came to write about herself, Gravity Pulls You In is a testament to parents "valiant and remarkably dedicated."

(Excerpted from my interview with editor Kyra Anderson on [...])

-Shannon Des Roches Rosa

Gravity Pulls You In is a collection of thirty-three essays and poems written by parents of children who are on the autism spectrum. Autism is not a disease but a disorder. The common thread of children who have autism is some degree of social impairment.

In his forward, John Elder Robinson, autistic himself, states that autism is all the autistic child knows. The autistic child may be aware of having less ability, but autism is their "normal." However, autism is not normal for the parent. In one essay, a mother says that she died the day her daughter was diagnosed as a savant.

These honest essays and poems examine the physiological and emotional toll that autism has on parents. Parents share personal experiences and perspectives about how their child's disorder affects them and how they see themselves as the "outsiders," trying to understand and move their children forward into functioning closer to "normal." Within the pages, parents discuss how they have become advocates for awareness of autism and for early intervention to help their children.

Through their stories, parents explain how the diagnosis of autism redefined their worlds and their parenting roles. In "Evolution of a Fairy," Carolyn Walker says, "When it is impossible for a child to change, a mother must, I discovered. It is the only way to keep the heart whole." Another mother asks, "Will today be the day you can start being the mother you wanted to be?"

Parents detail how difficult "autism land" can be, marked by therapies, IEPs (IEP is an acronym for individualized education plan, which outlines in detail what instructional and other special services will be provided for children with special needs), clinical charts, disclaimers, and more labels. And even through the anguish of the stories and poems, the reader hears hope, love and compassion in the voices of the parents who are growing inside of themselves, deliberately and fully embracing their journeys.

by Judy Miller
for Story Circle Book Reviews
reviewing books by, for, and about women

As a speech-language pathologist who works with children with autism spectrum disorders, I found this collection of incredible essays to be inspiring. It added many layers of understanding to my relationships with my clients and their families. I cannot recommend it highly enough - I read most of it in one sitting, I never wanted to put it down. I'd like to give a copy to every family I work with!

For a parent with a child on the Autism Spectrum meny of these storeys rang true to me. They brought back feelings I had when my child was diagnoised, and some funny storeys I had not looked at at the time as funny. I would recomend this to any one that deals with children on the spectrum. It is a great book!Gravity Pulls You in: Perspectives on Parenting Children on the Autism Spectrum

Gravity Pulls You in is the real deal - this is the book that talks about the dreams, the hopes, the fears, the life of raising a child on the autism spectrum. It is such a wonderful book that I forfeited a precious nights' sleep to luxuriate in every story. I'm getting a copy for every member of our family for the holidays this year - I recommend the same for all parents of children with special needs. Gravity offers the perfect insight into a day in the life.

I couldn't wait for Gravity Pulls You In to come out, and not just because I know several of the contributors (although that was part of the reason, of course). It's because the very idea of this book - a collection of essays and poems written by different parents of very different children on the autism spectrum - is unique and remarkable.

Kyra and Vicki have done an amazing job of editing and sequencing the contributions; the essays and poems flow into one another with the grace and beauty with which they were written. Each piece is an integral part of one of three sections: "Notes from Autism's Edges," insightful writings about the experiences of and observations on being the parent of a child with an ASD; "String Theory," emotional offerings on the connections we have with our children; "And the Shoes Will Take Us There," inspiring pieces about where we have gone with our children, and how we got there.

They are all beautiful, all universal. I found myself alternately laughing and crying my way through the book, all the while nodding my head. This is quite a journey we share. Our experiences may well be different, but we can identify with all of them. We empathize, we understand. And several times I felt like I was reading about my son, as if I had written it. As if this fellow parent had looked into my memories and said, "Yes, I've been there too. You are not alone."

Gravity Pulls You In is a wonderfully touching anthology that I highly recommend to anyone whose life is affected by autism, whether a parent, relative, friend, neighbor, teacher, or therapist. This book is the parents' perspective - what we think and believe, how we feel, what we do, and why. I've read many autism-related books over the years since my son's diagnosis. Almost all of them I enjoyed, but only a few found a permanent home on my bookshelves. The rest have been given away to others who might also enjoy them or learn from them. But not Gravity Pulls You In. It's staying right here. It's that beautiful.