Customer Reviews

Grief Girl: My True Story

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As a male in his thirties, I'm quite the opposite of Grief Girl's target reader, and yet I found this book thoroughly engrossing and moving. Erin Vincent adopts the perfect tone and style for Grief Girl -- descriptive enough to be literary, yet not so ornate that we lose the the voice of the young girl experiencing the trauma of losing both parents. (Vincent writes in present tense to put us in the moment, and uncannily captures what a 14-year-old sounds like.) Vincent also writes with such honesty that we can't help but feel everything she is going through. I hope more adults take the opportunity to read Grief Girl -- go ahead, you can let your teenage daughter read it when you're done.

"grief girl" is a memoir that reads like a YA problem novel. The narrator/author is fourteen years old when the unthinkable happens. Her beloved mother dies in a car crash and her father is severely injured. A month later, Erin's father dies from a blood clot to the heart.

Erin is the middle child, and much of her struggle after her parents' death results from her powerlessness. Older sister Tracy turns eighteen just days after their mother dies. She has already left school (grief girl is set in Australia) and begun a training program in cosmetology. Tracy has a steady boyfriend--a solid guy named Chris--and she assumes full responsibility for Erin and their much younger brother, Trent. As is only natural, she tries to shield Erin and Trent from responsibility, but is also angry that everything fell to her.

What I most appreciated about "grief girl" is its honesty. Vincent asks brutal questions, even if they don't have an answer and, in fact, reflect badly on her. Before her parents' death, Erin imagines the following scene while rehearsing a play with her theater group:

"I'll be sitting in this same chair a week from today and Mum and Dad will be gone. Tragedy will strike. Life will be ruined, changed forever. But the show must go on. I'll have to struggle on without them. I'll be up onstage rehearsing through the pain and everyone will think I'm noble and brave. Most people, if their parents died, would never be able to perform...but not me. I'm amazing and strong. It will be the best performance of my life. Everyone will say, 'Look at her! Isn't she incredible? A true star.'" (30-31)

Erin is not always likable as she narrates her story. While in school she becomes absorbed in her grief and it defines her. She wears her father's shirt for months on end. She fights with her sister and dreams of success only she can bring to her family. But, she's honest and straightforward, and "grief girl" resonates long after you've read the last page.

The death of Erin Vincent's parents, as chronicled in her memoir GRIEF GIRL, threw her into a kind of adolescent nightmare. Everything about being an early teen was heightened. Most 14-year-olds forget to vacuum but when Erin leaves the house a mess she risks her older sister's losing custody of their baby brother. Juggling school and a job is difficult but if Erin gets fired her family loses an important source of income. Arguing with her older and responsible (but still teenage) sister is like taking on her sister and your mother at once. Her monstrous grandparents are no longer an inconvenience and an embarrassment but a real threat as they try to weasel little Trent (one of the most loving portraits of a sibling I can remember reading) from his sisters' control. The feeling that everyone is looking at you is heightened because, well, everyone is looking at you, the grief girl. And how do you deal with having fantasized about your parents' death when they actually die?

Erin Vincent unflinchingly records her ambivalent feelings about her parents, who were loving but flawed. She talks about her flirtation with religion, her relationships with her teachers, her confusion, her friendships. Her raw grief and anger predominate but the humor and warmth keep this from being a dismal read. The one thing it never is, is self-pitying.

Highly recommended.

I just barely finished reading Erin Vincent's memoir, Grief Girl. When Erin was fourteen, both of her parents were killed in a car crash. Her mom, instantly. Her father died a little later in the hospital, due to a blood clot. Now, left with her sister (17), brother (3), and a band of relatives with suspicious motives, Erin must figure out how to pick up the pieces and remember how to live her own life. So far, I'm really liking Erin's raw, emotional story. She somehow manages to mix a sense of humor in with moments of deep despair. A gripping, sincere read.

This book was on the list of choices for my 8th grade child's English class. (Autobiographical stories) So, I read it too. It's a sad, true story that is very moving, and I found it to be an interesting read, but I was disappointed with the profanity scattered through the book. This book was published specifically for the adolescent market, and the inclusion of such words, speaks to an impoverished vocabulary on the part of the author and the publisher. This detacts from a story that is otherwise worth reading.

In this heartbreaking yet uplifting memoir, Erin Vincent recounts the tragedy of losing both of her parents in a terrible car accident when she was fourteen. What makes the story so sad, at least for me, was that fact that her father, unlike her mother, was not killed instantly in the crash, but survived for a number of weeks before succumbing to his injuries. For me, this fact made Ms. Vincent's story even more difficult, as it felt like hope had left her family for good.

"They say God is a comfort to all those who mourn. How can you be a comfort to those you've made suffer? What manipulation! It's like having your wounds dressed by the person who hurt you...No, sorry, you're a bit late, God."

For Erin, it takes awhile to realize that wishing something bad would happen to your parents is not the same as killing them. It doesn't take long, though, to realize that her horrible extended family - her father's parents and her mother's wretched brothers - are up to no good. With only her older sister, Tracy, and Tracy's boyfriend, Chris, to watch our for Erin and her younger brother, Trent, things are not going to get easier in a hurry.

As life goes on - Erin returns to school, she watches as both her mother and father are buried, she goes on a trip with her theater group - she realizes that life cannot be categorized as either good or bad, but rather is a series of ups and downs, of highs and lows. As Erin leans on her best girlfriend, as the only true friends of her parents help out her beleaguered "family" when they need help, she learns that life does go on, whether you want it to or not.

The wonderful thing about GRIEF GIRL is that Ms. Vincent never comes across as pitiful, although it would be easy to pity a girl who lost both of her parents. Although technically an orphan, she never adopted that orphan attitude. And even though there were many times throughout her life in which both friends and family took advantage of her, Erin shows in the end the fighting spirit to reclaim what is hers - something that I'm sure would make her mother and father very, very proud.

This is a wonderful memoir I would recommend to anyone, but especially those who have faced their own losses. Ms. Vincent's enduring spirit of strength is to be admired.

Reviewed by: Jennifer Wardrip, aka "The Genius"

This is a memoir about a girl who lost both her parents when she was fourteen. She had a very young brother and a teenage older sister at the time, and they learned how to raise themselves. The situation reminded me of the old TV show Party of Five or Eggers' memoir A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius, but this book is unique and special.

Though the situation is very sad, the author has a wonderful sense of humor and a bright outlook. And there is an upbeat, hopeful ending. It's narrated with refreshing honesty and sensitivity. The people in Vincent's life-- her burdened older sister and her caring best friend and her rotten uncles and grandparents-- are fully described. Even her departed parents are shown as flawed individuals. It's an engrossing book and surprisingly heartwarming. I'd recommend it to anyone.

This is the most honest, daring, and original memoir I have ever read... definitely not just for teens.
And when it comes to grief... no one has written about it like this before.
Absolutely BRILLIANT!!!!

Grief Girl: My True Story
Grief Girl is a very good example of how NOT to raise a child. The book tells, in vivid detail, what happens when a child has no value system, faith or hope. It is the story of what NOT to do during the grieving process. While well written, it is NOT a story of love and hope. I do NOT recommend it for reading to help someone with their grieving.