Customer Reviews

Ground Rules: What I Learned My Daughter's Fifteenth Year

5 star:		(2)
4 star:		(1)
3 star:		(0)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(1)

 

 

Imagine being married to the local San Francisco rabbi. Then imagine having the 15yo daughter from hell, complete with runaway episodes, truant behavior, the works. Sherril Jaffe had to deal with all of it, and she tells us the trials of her parenting efforts as she tries to understand, discipline, and help her older daughter thru the trials of adolescence while, at the same time, trying to hold the family together. And all of it is done under the eyes of her husband's congregation. Jaffe gets points for her honesty and humor.
Oy vey.

Sherril Jaffe's poetic approach to the description of her daughters' teen years is engaging and charming. For anyone who has ever coped with a rebellious teenager, or who has known someone who has, this book will have the ring of truth. The author's ability to create short chapters, each of which not only describes an event in the life of their family, but also illuminates a larger truth, gives the reader much more to think about than the "plot" material would indicate. Perhaps this mother, or these parents, did not do everything right in raising their daughters, but there are few who do; the obvious care and love which underlie their actions are universal and give the reader the impression that, in the long run, things will turn out well. So often parents believe that they are the only ones going through hard times with their teens; this book, which I have lent to several parents whose teens seemed out-of-control at the moment, despite good parenting, makes one realize that a little humor goes a long way in raising children, and that the darkest times may not be completely bleak. This is a book that allows one to keep a sense of perspective on difficulties and the author must be commended for her ability to realize that everything changes, and so will family life and the behavior of children.

Don't mistake this for a how-to book. It's much more... an intriguing memoir. Ground Rules reads like quality fiction. A big part of its appeal is the humor.

....I am not so sure. Although my heart broke for this poor woman as I read about her children, I still wanted to shake her. I understand that sometimes we cannot control our children's actions, which this I do agree with the author. However, we can control how we react. When she ever told her daughter, "I feel awful when you call me a dumbass." I thought I would scream. Sounds like her problems started along time ago. Those girls took violin lessons, let me tell you, because they played her like a pro. Glad to hear all is now well for her. And lets talk about the father. He must have been the one to give the girls lessons. They all knew exactly what they wanted from the mother and they got it.